Long winded answer ... fair warning, because I put off replying a tad longer than I intended because I wanted to read each post and then reflect my views on them.
Fear of dying is the subject then.
Often times I've contemplated or meditated about my own death, which as with all living things, must come.
Is it that God calls us? Or is it fate, destiny or sheer chance that one happens to be where they are when they die?
From Dune: "When God wants a creature to die in a particular place he causeth that creatures wants to driect them to that place... "
You're driving home on the freeway from work, the dojo, or just visiting with friends and a drunk driver collides with your vehicle head-on killing you. Is that God calling, or just plain bad luck?
I've more near-death experiences than I care to count myself; guns pointed at my face and cocked, knives thrust into my body, my own innards spilling out on to the floor when, as a child I fell upon a broken glass bottle, large rocks crashing inches from me when deep inside my beloved caves, car accidents, attacked by the scum of the earth (muggers) armed with knives and pistols, climbing up a 300 foot deep pit on a rope and finding it's beginning to fray as I reach the edge, and so forth.
Was this God calling me home and I just failed to answer the phone? Did I spit in death's face and told him to go take someone else for I am not ready to die today?
Or was God's hand in there somewhere sparing me each time, for a work I've yet to start or complete? A work that I may (or may not) be aware of? Who knows? God does I guess.
Being afraid of leaving things yet un-done is something that
shouldn't (IMO) concern us if our faith(s) in whatever God(s) we choose to believe (or not believe in) to take care of such things after we die, if our faith is strong enough. If it's there and you truly do believe then you can die in peace, trusting Him who is also sometimes known as the Almighty.
For those who do not (choose) to believe in such things, then it really doesn't matter does it. For when you die; that's it, nothing more, knowing nothing, feeling and thinking ... nothing... so it doesn't matter... right?
The last thing that you do before you die. Ah yes, all of us wish to be in the midst of doing something noble and good for our fellow man. Like the police/firemen in the North and South towers of the WTC, or to die fighting as your plane crashes into a previously unknown field somewhere in Pennslyvania. Much more preferable than sitting at your desk when your world erupts in a ball of flaming vaporizing jet fuel before you even had a chance to look up form your computer terminal to see what's coming. Or to be one of those who sat helplessly in their seats as the plane hurtled towards one of the buildings. But since we know not the hour of our impending deaths we go on with our lives best as we may and as we see fit.
We rarely choose the method of our deaths, save for suicides whether they be noble or selfish. We would like to think that we can choose them and go out peacefully, quietly or in a blaze of glory... or at least somewhere in between. We would like to think that we would appreciate the knowledge of the hour of our deaths. Yet there are many of us who would've been just as happy to remain ignorant. Cancer, diabetes, aids, lukemia and a dozen other diseases that would eventually bring us down should we the misfortune of getting them.
Jenna said:
You're quite correct fear serves no purpose whether in a fight or when facing death. Fear however; has a way of breaking any fences you might put up to keep it under control don't you think?
Yes, in one way but fear does sometimes throws up those same fences that will get you to run out (or in) that burning house or turn the steering wheel in time to avoid a collision, or to fight back and use your training to (try) knock the gun/knife out of an assailant's hand... it's a double edged sword; fear is.
Dying bravely or dying in fear, IMO death is indifferent to either. When it comes, it's finished. We can fight it or plead with it, it won't matter. Death has a schedule to keep and won't be thwarted by those resisting or begging for a few more moments of life.
crushing said:
I'm not really afraid of my own death, but I am concerned that in the confusion of such a life ending event, and that because around 110 people die a minute, that someone else's God might accidently take me home with her/Him/it.
Heh, you make me think of a quote from Alfred Hitchcock who spoke upon the differences between Horror and Terror. He explained:
"Terror is when you're in a crowded room and know that there's a bomb about to go off and there's no way out. Horror is after the bomb goes off and you're the only one left alive."
The things that I do certianly seem like I court danger and death everytime I do them, but I'm really not. I am doing them as safely as possible as my training and common sense makes me. I make sure that I and all those with me (for I never do it alone), are being as safe likewise because knowing that even their failings can suddenly terminate the whole trip for me, and them. But I do them because the rewards at the end are well worth the risks taken. Same with scuba diving, rock climbing, sky-diving, and so forth. I want to live doing what I enjoy. If I die while doing so... then at least I will have died doing what I love. There may be a few moments of terror (such as the rope breaking and falling or hearing a large rock falling towards me and I've no where to go (been there done that... whew), but I will at least have died enjoying my life at that moment.
upnorthkyosa said:
I'm afraid to die. My fear of death puts my seat belt around my lap. My fear of death makes me put a helmet on when I ski or ride a bike. My fear of death makes me put my PFD on when I am canoeing.
I'm afraid of the regret everyone in my life would fel. I'm afraid of the "thought of the pain they would feel. My hope is that when I die, I will be old enough that people will expect it and the parting will not be so bitter.
I think that everyone, at some level, is afraid to die. It's a natural instinct that preserves life. Would our species lasted this long without this inborn fear? Probably not. And I think that humans know this instinctually. Think about how we view people who don't fear death. Nuts. Crackpots. Crazies. Psychos. You name it.
Is it possible to over-ride this instinct? Yes. But even then, people are still afraid and only their conditioning allows them to over come that fear.
A great insight.
Nomad, putting on a seat-belt, wearing a helmet, putting on a PFD, securing a harness and double checking a rope anchor, and checking the air in your scuba tank, and ensuring your parachute is folded properly so that it'll open without a hitch and so on... it's all common sense that helps avoid the possibilty of death. If common sense is to be interpreted as a "fear of death" then by all means I think it sounds like a smart thing to have around.
For those who go out of their way or ignore or have an appalling lack of common sense go see
www.darwinawards.com to find the best of these examples.
I do have to agree with you Nomad however; on your point that being afraid of death
is pointless. It's going to happen whether you want it to or not, whether you know it or not, whether you expect it or not, whether you intend it to or not.
Fear is something IMO, multi-faceted like a diamond. There are so many ways to fear that it's difficult to pin down one type of fear for each situation, circumstance, person, incident, thing, occurrance and so on.
But I think you and upnorthkyosa need to stop and take a look at something both of you said before continuing on with your *ahem* debate... because they're exactly the same thing ... just said differently.
upnorthkyosa said:
<snip> Is it possible to over-ride this instinct? Yes. But even then, people are still afraid and only their conditioning allows them to overcome that fear.
Nomad said:
If you allow fear of anything (death, heights, dogs, etc.) to dictate your actions, then it rules you completely.
Sounds like to me you guys just agreed upon the same thing here :uhyeah:
Oh by the way Nomad I couldn't resist
Nomad said:
A caver is exploring areas that most people will never get a chance to see, often a place with beautiful limestone sculptures and other features. You think his only motivation comes from the possibility of getting lost, falling or otherwise dying in the cave?
I can answer that with a definite "no" but admit that while there is a possibility, we (cavers) train long and hard to avoid those things happening... having personally been on several (real) rescues and numerous rescue trainings, I can affirm that it is an awful thing to have to have happened and it's a scary thing too (if it didn't kill you outright at first). Thus, fear definitely motivates me to learn what I can do to avoid these things from happening to me (or anyone else).
The short answer (finally
) to the main question; is simply "no, I am not afraid to die." I don't want to and will fight it, but death is not that terrible. I saw it on the face of my mother the morning I went to wake her up and found her gone so many years ago. The peace and serenity that was on her countenance told me that I had nothing to fear. I've lived that way ever since.
:asian:
Thank you for your above thoughts... And sadly I have to get a bit shouty with you for mocking you just leave my angel alone you mister! And I see you looking at her through the eyes of a father and not a lover but even still you might be able to discern she is an angel and thus sworn to temperence and sobriety and abstinence from appetites and she is finding herself a little more um... pent up frustrated in.... OTHER ways if you follow. Now you can close your mind again and return to mundane thoughts, ha!
