eHarmony: Anyone Ever Use It?

[LoneRider]

I was talking over my dating flops with some good friends of mine and one of them came away with maybe I should post a profile on eHarmony or similar dating site so I can find exactly what I look for in a woman. Has anyone had any experience with using these online dating services?

 

[CuongNhuka]

I was talking over my dating flops with some good friends of mine and one of them came away with maybe I should post a profile on eHarmony or similar dating site so I can find exactly what I look for in a woman. Has anyone had any experience with using these online dating services?

Personnaly, I wouldn't, but I'm not going to say anything if you do.

However, I've heard things about craigslist.

 

[Ken Morgan]

I know of people who have used similar sites with some good and bad luck.

I think as long as its not going to cost you a ton of cash and your privacy is protected, what do you have to lose?

Ya gotta fish, where the fish are….

 

[MA-Caver]

I know of people who have used similar sites with some good and bad luck.

I think as long as its not going to cost you a ton of cash and your privacy is protected, what do you have to lose?

Ya gotta fish, where the fish are….

I've known a few people myself who have had success with on-line dating/meeting sites... some are happily married... my own brother has met his woman via Yahoo. I signed up for a few myself (including E-harmony) but haven't had success... I can't afford the E-harmony sites and their drawback is that you don't CHOOSE your match... they choose for you... they're supposed to be accurate but who knows? Don't be naive to trust their commercials okay...

Irony of it all (for me anyway) is that I met my present love in person a while back... it just took this long for us to realize that we are a pretty good match... and no dating site did it for us.

So yeah, fish where the fish are of course but keep your options open and get out of the house enough to meet people in person.

 

[rdonovan1]

I've trie eharmony before as well as several other dating websites, but with very little luck.

I've tried Love-town.com and I've tried MySpace as well as Match.com. All that I've come across with Love-town and MySpace were scams and because of all that I am really starting to think that I am probably going to end up alone and like Mr. Miyagi.

I don't know about anyone else, but I personally think being single sucks big time. That's just my personal opinion.

 

[Tez3]

My shift partner went on one called 'plentymorefish', I don't know if it's just a UK one or not. Anyway we kept finding him asleep and grumpy because he was so tired, well no wonder, he had a string of women to keep happy lol! After a little while he settled down with one and I think he will be leaving the job soon as she's bought him a pub to manage where she lives, he also gets to drive around in her BMW ZX4 sports car, is on holiday in the Canaries as I write ( oh I hate him) and gets given presents galore...£40 aftershave anyone!
You men could always look for British women lol!

 

[grydth]

I met my wife on match.com.

Came across the site by accident when I was checking out the weather channel for how to dress my two young daughters (then 7 and 4) the next day.... it was a link, as I recall.

As too many folks can tell you, when your ex walks out one doesn't feel too hot about the prospects of dating - but what the heck, the kids were asleep, nobody would ever know..... the site let you put in a profile, with the option of letting match.com find who's best for you. Given the 'success' of my last try on my own, I let them do it...... they found a woman who was a single mom that they claimed was a 100% match with me. They were right. We've been together for 6 years, married for 3. Can't imagine anyone could be better for either one of us.

I'd never have met her on my own, and I found the chance to talk on line far superior to trying to decide whether to hand out a phone number in a 20 minute first meeting.

Figuring (as she put it) if it could work for me, it could work for anyone my assistant at work tried one of these sites when her marriage went south..... she is now happily married to a great guy.

 

[Ken Morgan]

My shift partner went on one called 'plentymorefish', I don't know if it's just a UK one or not.

I’ve known a few women who have tried plentyoffish. To them it’s a pick up place, just to get laid. I think the one had a different guy at least every week, but that’s what she wanted. I’m sure there would be people on there looking for more in a relationship, but I don’t know.

 

[Tez3]

I’ve known a few women who have tried plentyoffish. To them it’s a pick up place, just to get laid. I think the one had a different guy at least every week, but that’s what she wanted. I’m sure there would be people on there looking for more in a relationship, but I don’t know.

My shift partner had just broken up with his missus and was very down, I think the women he met made him feel he still had 'it', I think it was a bit of a shock to him when he found a serious relationship. I think though there's sections on the site so you can met people for either 'friendship' or proper relationships.

 

[LoneRider]

Thanks for all the feedback you guys have given me. I've decided to post my profile on e-Harmony yet keeping my options open. I've just gotta stay hopeful.

 

[Tez3]

Thanks for all the feedback you guys have given me. I've decided to post my profile on e-Harmony yet keeping my options open. I've just gotta stay hopeful.

The trick is to look for friendships I think and let what ever else happens happen. Nothing puts potential partners off like the scent of desparation, just take it quite casually, you may not find a partner for a while but make friends and have a good time.

 

[Carol]

I liked eHarmony. I met a few nice guys on there, including one I dated for a little while. Something they don't tell you though - the faster you respond to the selections that you receive (even if its responding to say you aren't interested), the faster you will get new matches from the computer.

 

[rdonovan1]

I don't know if it is just me or not but from what I have seen of the entire dating world people just are not interested unless you are wealthy like Bill Gates and look like a movie star.

That's just my observation anyhow and that is why I am trying to fix my life up by as much as I can and as to why I am studying what I can as I am trying to compensate for what I don't have in those departments.

I might be the only one who believes this, but I personally think that personality is and should be more important than either looks or money as both looks and money are temporary.

I tend to think that personlity is the most important thing when it comes to the dating scene because once the looks and the money are gone all you will really have left is your overall personality as well as your morals and ethics and in my opinion that along with romance and how to really feel about someone is and will be the deciding factor into what kind of relationship that you have with a member of the opposite sex and as to what the quality of that relationship is going to be like.

That's just my personal opinion.

 

[Clint Franklin]

Tez3 and rdonovan1 have good points - it's really important in a long-term relationship to build bonds that go beyond the ephemeral things. Imagine when you're older coming to the realization that you and your partner have "lost" that connection that kept you together.

I tried eHarmony about five years back. Don't know how things are run now, but the match-making portion of it seemed a bit... well, dubious. Things I marked as "very important" being the polar opposite on the match's profile, etc. But, things may be better now, and my area may have been a factor (I live in a very rural area - to put it lightly).

Right now though, I'm content with being on my own. Personally, I think that people have a hard time connecting with someone who is uncomfortable with themselves (in the sense that they feel they "have to" be with someone). So, be patient, be vigilant, and - when the time is right - you'll probably find someone with whom you will be happy (and vice versa, with any luck).

 

[Tez3]

One quite nice thing to do is become a penpal with a military person, it may or may not lead to a relationship so I wouldn't go into it looking for love for sure but it certainly cheers them up when they are on ops to receive letters. At any rate it's a fun and worthwhile thing to do.

 

[rdonovan1]

I wonder why it is that whenever people try to meet members of the opposite sex and to establish a relationship with them they are often left feeling like they are either trying to compete for a job or going to war.

I've never figured it out, but that is how I often end up feeling as I myself can just never seem to meet any real quality women either online or offline.

eHarmormny's overall idea of compatibility matching is good, but what I don't like about is that you can't actually talk to the person and ask more free form questions like you can either via e-mail or in person.

I don't know but it just seems like meeting people today that have a decent personlity along with good morals and values is a lot like trying to be a dentist to a Cobra.

I'm not saying that to be mean, but from what I have seen a lot of people out in the world seem to run on things like fear and greed and trying to overcome any of that seems almost impossible because if you don't look or act certain way then they can and will cut you down and try to make you feel as though you are the worst person on this earth.

The only reason that I can think of as to why people tend to do that outside of fear and greed is ego and while I have not been able to prove it as of yet I am strongly thinking that many of the ideas that we get relating to love, romance, and sex basically comes from the media and the way we tend to view one another in society due to the way that we were taught and due to peer pressure as well.

These are just what I think might be some of the causes, but I may be wrong. All I know is that I am asking myself as to what I can change about myself so that I am not only more successfull financially, but in all areas of my life.

 

[Cryozombie]

I found that Eharmony was obnoxious, and you had to go thru a whole bunch of rigamaroll before you could even talk to anyone it matched you with... assuming you wanted to in the first place, since they dont let you select a lot of traits that may be important to you like Prior Marital Status, Kids, Body Type, etc... and even in the catagory of Age, it only gives you a very narrow range of ages to choose from.

FWIW, I met my current Girlfriend online, on OKCupid, which is free. Plus there is plenty to do on there other than just meet dates, so its like a Dating Social Network site. Its a good place to just post who you are, blog, take quizzes, answer questions, chat, forum, be yourself, and make some friends and do some dating. I had more dates in 3 months on there than I did in 12 months on Match.com... and I paid for match.

 

[Tez3]

I found that Eharmony was obnoxious, and you had to go thru a whole bunch of rigamaroll before you could even talk to anyone it matched you with... assuming you wanted to in the first place, since they dont let you select a lot of traits that may be important to you like Prior Marital Status, Kids, Body Type, etc... and even in the catagory of Age, it only gives you a very narrow range of ages to choose from.

FWIW, I met my current Girlfriend online, on OKCupid, which is free. Plus there is plenty to do on there other than just meet dates, so its like a Dating Social Network site. Its a good place to just post who you are, blog, take quizzes, answer questions, chat, forum, be yourself, and make some friends and do some dating. I had more dates in 3 months on there than I did in 12 months on Match.com... and I paid for match.

That sounds civilised and more like 'real' life. I think there's too much pressure sometimes on dates, much better to get to know each other, go out for a drink, a meal or do something together that you enjoy and let the relationship develop rather than sit eyeing each other and ticking boxes!

 

[Tames D]

Thanks for all the feedback you guys have given me. I've decided to post my profile on e-Harmony yet keeping my options open. I've just gotta stay hopeful.

I wish you the best and I know you'll find your match. When you do, will you be changing your user name?

 

[LoneRider]

I wish you the best and I know you'll find your match. When you do, will you be changing your user name?

Perhaps I'll keep it as a reminder of my days as a relative free spirit. I don't know yet.