I have lost touch with many of my friends because all I do is train and lift weights now
As you get on in life, you will probably regret not having friends more than you will regret missing a day of training now and then. BTW - I train 4-5 days per week and I still manage to have a number of good friends that I stay in touch with. Having friends and training are not exclusive.
my girlfriend seems unhappy too but honestly I don't care. She may not be the right one if it is too hard to accept I have goals in life.
If you don't care about your girlfriend's happiness, then you are clearly not the right one for her.
This is all because I want to be something, I want to be somebody, Its my goal to go to competitions whether they be karate competitions, Judo competitions or mma competitions. I honestly don't care what the competition is so long as it will give me the following.
1. Credibility.
2. Proof, I want to prove to myself that I am good at what I been doing since my teen years.
And finally 3. Proof to other people that I am good at what I am doing.
It sounds like your primary motivation is to validate your worth and impress others through your martial arts skill. You will ultimately be happier in your own life and more satisfied with your martial arts training if you don't worry about impressing others, accept that you have worth as a human being regardless of your martial arts ability, and train because you love the art.
BTW - 99% of the people in your life won't really care if you win a trophy (or 10) for martial arts competition. At most it will be a bit of trivia for them about the hobbies you life.
So my question is what should I do here as far as continuing my training at the Shou Shu dojo. Many of my friends say that it will never make me meet my goals and they think the teacher is not talented enough.
Are your friends experienced martial artists who have observed your instructor's classes? If not, then their opinions on the subject are worthless.
The sifu does not wish to let me spar until purple belt which is like the 3rd belt, white, orange then purple.
How long is the expected timeline to reach purple belt in Shou Shu?
Even then I been hearing their sparring is full contact allowing anything, literally anything but the bouts are only 30 seconds long.
This of course is a concern for me because real matches are not that short.
What do you mean by "real matches?" Most real fights are probably over in 30 seconds. If you're talking about sport competition, then it depends on the sport. Do you know what the competition rules are for Shou Shu?
He did let me spar a few times but after hurting someone by accident he said it was a mistake to let me do that.
That I don't have enough control yet. I don't agree with this because it was an accident and the guy was smaller than me. It is very hard for me to distinguish the amount of force I should be using. I am often told not enough is being used, then when I use more force I get in trouble.
That is pretty much the textbook definition of "not having control."
Its my goal to go to competitions whether they be karate competitions, Judo competitions or mma competitions.
If you want to compete in karate, then you need to be training karate. If you want to compete in Judo, then you need to be training Judo. If you want to compete in MMA, then you need to be training MMA. Regardless of how good your Shou Shu classes are, they won't getting you ready to compete in these other contexts.
Not having seen your instructor or knowing what your training alternatives are, I have no opinion as to whether you should find another school. Here are some questions you might ask yourself to help figure out the answer:
Do you enjoy the training?
Do the senior students and the instructor display the skills and attributes you would like to develop in yourself?
What other schools are available in the area which fit with your schedule, budget, and transportation logistics?
Good luck!
