Respect- Given Or Earned?

[cali_tkdbruin]

Originally posted by Senfeng
I believe that respect should always be given automatically; especially if you've never met the person before. I also believ that it CAN be earned or increased, but can also be lost.

I don't know sportsfans, at least I will agree that we're not on the same page on this topic.

Respect is earned, not automatically given IMHO... :asian:

 

[Senfeng]

Originally posted by cali_tkdbruin
I don't know sportsfans, at least I will agree that we're not on the same page on this topic.

Respect is earned, not automatically given IMHO... :asian:

Well... its what I believe. All I'm saying is that I tend to give everyone the benefit of the doubt before casting judgement on them. They may do something to increase or decrease that level of respect by their actions.

 

[Rich Parsons]

Originally posted by LostGrrlDies
It always depends on the situation.

A great professor once said, "It depends." He made sure that if we learned nothing else under his instruction that we would always know, "it depends." Hence, now when asked a question it is my favorite initial response.

It depends. Blahblahblah.

It depends. Yaddayaddayadda.

It depends. blabyaddablah.

Quite annoying to my friends, if you could imagine. Of course I only do it to mess with them, so they stop asking me so many silly questions.

I agree it always depends upon the situation

 

[Ender]

Originally posted by Rich Parsons
Respect Given or Earned?

Short Answer: Both.

Long Answer:

When I meet someone new I give them the basi respect of meetnig someone new.

When, I come across people who are older than me (* i.e. 60+ *) I give them respect for their age and the life they have lived. If I learn after that, that they do not deserve my respect then I do not offer it. These are generalities.

When I meet a lady, I offer my respect. (* note if she steps onto the mats though, then she is either a student or a teacher, and has my respect as either, not just as a women. *)

In general I offer it in a limited manner until you prove yourself to me. Who am I to have anyone prove themselves to me? I am the one who is either going to or not going to offer his respect. There are those I do not respect yet I am forced to work with them and can do this.

Have a nice day

Excellent. an Initial and basic respect is given, and dimishes or grows after some time.

 

[Lunumbra]

I always try to be courteous to all people when I first meet them. From there, I evaluate them from my POV. I try to give folks a second chance, if they do something that I find offensive, I don't base a judgement of them on one incident. But I DO REMEMBER . . . if the negatives start to stack up . . .

Lunumbra

 

[DAC..florida]

Originally posted by D.Cobb
Ok here's the question.

Do you believe that respect, should be given, or earned?

Some people say that respect should be earned, but then tell me I should respect them automatically.

What makes them so special?

Others say that respect is a given. That it is up to you to keep it, by your actions, words and deeds.

I am wondering what you guys and gals have to say on this subject.

--Dave

:asian:

Respect is given and you must earn the right to keep it!:asian:

 

[gojukylie]

I agree with the principle behind your comments but I must genuinley say that I am 'Courteous' to all people, including strangers. From there if I get to know them, then they may earn their respect. I try not to confuse coutesy with respect.

 

[Nightingale]

Originally posted by DAC..florida
Respect is given and you must earn the right to keep it!:asian:

That's it exactly!!!!!!!

Well said!

:asian:

 

[KennethKu]

Originally posted by Kaith Rustaz
Rank can be bought. (cost of a black belt is only $3+S/H)

Got mine for $2.50. It was on sale.

Seriously, I don't respect any belt or rank or anything, any more than I would respect the person himself/herself.

The only thing that count is the character of the person and content of his/her conduct. I would (and I have) spit on a blackbelt or a master anyday, and I would bestow the highest respect to the lowest rank and file anyday. The underlying factor is what kind of a person he/she is, nor his/her rank or belt or status.

 

[KennethKu]

Originally posted by nightingale8472
I said that if they'd earned a black belt, they had my respect AS A MARTIAL ARTIST.

Respect for them as a human being is automatic.

Respect for them as a person/individual... now THAT one takes a long time to earn...

I can respect someone for their martial arts skills and hold a low opinion of their moral character, and vice versa.

If the guy is a scum ball, I wouldn't walk over the street to piss on him if he is on fire, no matter what his martial art skill is or is not.

 

[IsshinryuKarateGirl]

In my dojo, the respect comes from both ways. You are always told to respect the person's rank, so some respect comes from that. But other respect you have to earn. I myself have definately had to earn a lot of respect, as a student and a female in the MA.

 

[tshadowchaser]

Originally posted by IssinryuKarateGirl
In my dojo, the respect comes from both ways. You are always told to respect the person's rank, so some respect comes from that. But other respect you have to earn.

Great answere. It should be both ways. A person should be respcted because of their accomplishments but should also earn that respect by what they do

 

[LostGrrlDies]

i am a 24 yo white belt. so as you can all see there are quite a few black belts younger than myself. i do not respect all of the black belts in my school on the same level. Some of them share the same rank and age but not the same discipline. I am more than willing to learn from a 16 yo. However, that 16 yo has to be willing to teach me. Some are, some arent. You can imagine which do and dont receive my respect. :shrug:

 

[James Kovacich]

Originally posted by LostGrrlDies
i am a 24 yo white belt. so as you can all see there are quite a few black belts younger than myself. i do not respect all of the black belts in my school on the same level. Some of them share the same rank and age but not the same discipline. I am more than willing to learn from a 16 yo. However, that 16 yo has to be willing to teach me. Some are, some arent. You can imagine which do and dont receive my respect. :shrug:

Its a difficult situation sometimes. At 16, they may not "understand" teaching. Earning a belt does make a teacher.

:asian:

 

[cali_tkdbruin]

Originally posted by KennethKu
Got mine for $2.50. It was on sale.

Seriously, I don't respect any belt or rank or anything, any more than I would respect the person himself/herself.

The only thing that count is the character of the person and content of his/her conduct. I would (and I have) spit on a blackbelt or a master anyday, and I would bestow the highest respect to the lowest rank and file anyday. The underlying factor is what kind of a person he/she is, nor his/her rank or belt or status.

Thank you, you and I are on the same page on this issue. It's the person his or herself who should be respected, and not their over-hyped rank.. :asian:

 

[theletch1]

Respect, like love is a human concept that has as many slight variations on definition as the people that espouse the concept. Websters has a definition for both words but I don't think anyone would say that that definition is EXACTLY what they would call respect or love. Do I love my parents? sure. Do I love my wife? Certainly. Do I love a good cup of coffee? Indeed. But none of these "loves" are the same. To put respect in the same light... Do I respect the person on the street that I've just met, yes. Do I respect the martial arts instructor who has proven to me that they are as dedicated to teaching as I am to learning? Certainly. Do I respect the bear that I walked up on in the woods last fall? Oh, yeah. But again, they are each completely different degrees of respect.

I know that the above paragraph doesn't do a lot to explain my answer on the first page of the thread but perhaps it will give just a little insight to my own thoughts during my answer.

 

[Michael Billings]

has an excellent answer, and the clarification helped. Very insightful.

I agree in theory and practice. A nice distinction and comparison.

-MB

 

[D.Cobb]

Originally posted by cali_tkdbruin
IMHO, a person needs to earn respect, and not expect it because of their rank or standing.

Originally posted by cali_tkdbruin
It's not someone's standing or rank that I respect, it's the person I respect... :asian:

So do you give them respect or do they have to earn it?
I'm not really talking about their rank just the person as a person.

--Dave
:asian:

 

[D.Cobb]

Originally posted by DAC..florida
Respect is given and you must earn the right to keep it!:asian:

I like this answer. This is what I try to do, but I'm still learning how to do it.

--Dave

:asian:

 

[D.Cobb]

Originally posted by IsshinryuKarateGirl
In my dojo, the respect comes from both ways. You are always told to respect the person's rank, so some respect comes from that. But other respect you have to earn. I myself have definately had to earn a lot of respect, as a student and a female in the MA.

Do you feel you have to earn it, or do you feel that you deserve respect?

Are there times, where you feel you don't deserve respect?
If so, why?

What about people outside the MA? Do you give them your respect or must they earn it?

If they have to earn your respect, do you expect theirs, or must you earn it?

Do you see where I'm going with this line of questioning?

--Dave

:asian: