Sometimes I type some ideas down and I realize that I just cannot be brief at all.
Tarot, when I chose a school, I made a decision based on factors that I never even though of, until I tried to do a school search. My team was given orders to take a mandatory 1 hour lunch break every day, and an hour with nothing to do at that place was torturous. So, I decided to train instead.
The most important thing to me at the time was distance from my job (I had to make it there and back within 1 hour) and lunchtime classes. I did some googling and found four schools within a suitable distance. I called them up in order of proximity.
The first school was different, it seemed to be a sort of MMA facility, according to it's web site. I visited it in the afternoon...it was basically a modern boxing gym. If I were up for a killer workout...I actually would have been tempted to join, but I was really looking for something more with more Asian influences. I scratched them off my list.
The second school had gone out of business. I scratched them off my list.
The third school was a Kenpo school. They had a huge website with lots of information about the school and the art. The school didn't seem overly commercialized, and there was a very family-oriented feel to the information. I had read a little bit about Kenpo, and it sounded very intriguing to me.
The fourth school was also a Kenpo school. Their website was less detailed, and their location was the furthest away from me, so I put them on the back burner.
I tried several times to call the third school. I always got an answering machine. I started picking through more of their website and found a page where they posted the school's rules. At that point, I almost shelved the idea of training.
There were rules about sparring, contact, weapons and a notable ban on horseplay. That started getting me a little worried. I was not in very good shape, and athletics has always been an area where I have performed poorly.
I was also surprised that I had to wrestle my training against the beliefs of my faith. This is something highly personal to me. I also thing other people's beliefs are also personal and deserving of respect. For that reason, I do not wish to discuss my faith or what I believe in or why I believe it. I'll just say...there were two rules at the dojo that were not unreasonable rules. One was a prohibition of all types of jewelry, the other was the mandate of an extremely specific type of bowing.
Another person of my faith suggested that I talk to the sensei about my faith. I was very reluctant to, because I did not want to seem disrespectful to my classmates. Nor did I want my personal beliefs exposed in such a fashion. He kept urging me to call, so I did, two more times. Answering machine, answering machine. I scratched the school of my list.
By the time I called the forth school, I felt like I didn't want to train at all. I didn't want to feel seperated from my faith. I didn't want to get hurt and banged up. I kept having these flashbacks of times I was in any kind of athletic class...the perpetually picked-last-in-gym class kid became the woman that simply could not follow or keep up with a group fitness class. It's not that I'm a stupid person...engineers typically aren't...but I just really have a tough time with athletics.
I called the forth school up, a woman answered the phone. I mentioned I was interested in studying martial arts, and we started talking. And...she listened. A lot. She listened to my concerns about being out of shape. About not having any innate abilities. About my fear of getting hurt. She talked about other people in the class that have started with very diverse levels, and yet they have succeeded.
I realized when talking to her that she had this incredibly gentle, warm, supportive aura about her that I have seen in other accomplished martial artists. She had such good energy, and something about her was making me believe that she was a very trustworthy person.
Then I realized, she never talked about herself. She never talked about what the instructors did, or how great they were. She only mentioned what the students accomplished. How the students did.
I felt very comfortable with her. She never said anything that felt like a sales pitch. She didn't ask anything of me. She didn't talk about money. We continued our conversation, and it actually made me very emotional. I just couldn't seem to keep up with group classes, even though I tried. She said in a very honest tone that being a white belt was difficult, that it may be the hardest belt of all because everything is new. She gave me new examples of students that had succeeded. She said that the most important thing was to be in class. It was then that I realized that...instead of telling me that the instructors were experienced and patient...she was showing me how their experience and patience resulted in successful students.
We were on the phone for almost an hour.
I joined for a summer program, and really liked it. It worked well with my work schedule. By the time the summer was over, I loved the school so much that I signed a two year contract.
And then, things at work got worse, and I got laid off.
There was a legal (and ethical) way that I could have broken my contract under the circumstances. I didn't wnt to break it. And when the folks at my school immediately offered support upon hearing the news, I realize that I just couldn't leave. It was too much a part of me.
So now....I drive 45 minutes to work. At the end of the day, I drive 60 minutes to my dojo. After class, I drive 40 minutes to get home. And sometimes go on Saturday. Several people ask me why the heck don't I just study Karate right here in Salem...but I would be absolutely heartbroken if I had to leave my school behind to train someplace else.
I hope you find a school that you like very soon!