Quitting taekwondo

[marques]

You are not alone. It happens elsewhere (not style specific).

In more than 9 years training I missed 1 or 2 regular classes; and monthly paying for extra training.

Last years, paid only to train others during regular classes. One day was also forced to advertise with papers... That was my last training.

It was just before getting the black belt, even passed the examinations and verbally congratulated.

Good luck!

 

[geezer]

Shh...shh...nothing going on over here.

OK, now it's up to ...hmm 5?

And I got one more post out of it too! Now back to "Bumblebee" if he's still around. Yeah. What others have said about having a private, heart to heart discussion with your instructor would be a good idea, at least if you still value the art and want to go on to Black Belt.

Otherwise, either join another TKD school, ...or try another style, or just get better at videogames. It's your life. Enjoy it!

 

[marques]

I don't understand your logic here. You should have learned enough TKD.

Do you need a

- teacher to train? Your teacher will die one day.
- school to train? You may move to another city one day.

Why can't you train TKD all by yourself? If you train 100 flying side kick on a tree daily, you will have the best flying side kick on this planet. Anybody who wants to learn flying side kick will need to learn from you. What else do you need?

My experience is similar and I can talk for myself.

I needed someone to organise the classes, finding a training room and gathering training partners. So I could focus on my own training (with people, not against bags or trees).

There is always someone better to learn from and I never enjoyed instructing formally as much as just guiding training partners (that was nice).

My pleasure was the train itself, not managing a class and paperwork and complains... So, when I felt I was being used for the love of the training (and not even training that often) I dropped out.

 

[Flying Crane]

Similar discussion in this thread: Asking Sensei to be paid?

Might find some helpful discussion here.

 

[skribs]

I don't understand your logic here. You should have learned enough TKD.

Do you need a

- teacher to train? Your teacher will die one day.
- school to train? You may move to another city one day.

Why can't you train TKD all by yourself? If you train 100 flying side kick on a tree daily, you will have the best flying side kick on this planet. Anybody who wants to learn flying side kick will need to learn from you. What else do you need?

I have more than 10 years training in TKD. Probably more than OP has (he didn't list time trained). I am a 3rd degree black, and OP isn't even black belt yet. I think it's safe to say that if OP has "learned enough TKD", then I definitely should have.

And yet...I still get advice and criticism from my Master. These are things I wouldn't learn just by repeating my kicks over and over again. In fact, if I were to just repeat my way of doing things over and over again, I'd be reinforcing bad technique.

Now, your logic is horrible. Any white belt can say their teacher will die one day, or they may move, or they may quit. Why should they keep going to classes? Just because the teacher will one day not be there, doesn't mean you shouldn't learn all you can while they are there.

 

[Deleted member 34973]

I officially decided to quit taekwondo. I haven't been happy at my dojo for a while and I finally decided it doesn't make sense to do something I no longer enjoy. It kind of sucks since I was about 10 months away from getting my black belt.

The biggest issue is my instructor was making me teach classes and no longer training me - and I was expected to continue paying the regular student fee. When one of our student instructors left, I was pushed into helping cover the classes. I was a little worried about pushing back on him too much as I was so close to my black belt. I didn't want him to retaliate by not letting me take my black belt test.

However, things started getting worse. The master instructor stopped doing advanced belt training or any type of advanced self defense. The classes were all open classes (for all ranks) and he focused solely on teaching the lower ranking belts. Higher belts just basically had a review class of the lower material. He said that because I was a "high" ranking student, I shouldn't even take classes but either teach or help teach classes. My own training was expected to be done on my own time (and without anyone critiquing me or pushing me to get better). I know that black belts are expected to help teach but I never wanted to be solely an instructor. I always thought when I got my black belt, I'd continue to learn new things and continue to grow as a martial artist. I haven’t even sparred in over a year. Someone asked me what type of training I would do after I got my black belt and I realized that there was no training - I just would have to attend 2 years worth of "classes" (aka show up and teach) and pretty much be given my 2nd degree black belt.

I also felt like the instructor was taking advantage of me a bit, by expecting me to pay to teach his classes. I was a regular attendee of classes for several years. I was one of those students you could always count on being there. And instead of continuing to help me grow as a martial artist, I feel like he's taken advantage of my loyalty to the school. I also feel like he's worried about the school itself since we are small. He focuses so much on keeping new students, that he forgets about his advanced students. I realize now why so many students left when they were a high colored belt/new black belt. There was also a liability concern - the instructor regularly left the building during classes and I was left alone teaching. If someone accidently got hurt, I was worried if I would be held liable.

It's sad because I really enjoyed the past few years there. But it doesn't seem like the school is a good fit for me anymore. I'm not sure what I'm doing next, but for now I'm taking a break from martial arts.

I am curious, can't you just tell your instructor, that you are not interested in the direction he has you on?

 

[Buka]

There was an agreement in place when you first went to that dojo. You pay dues, they teach you TKD. But now they are no longer teaching you, yet you still pay dues.

I have a store here. When you come in, you can just leave the money but not take home anything. Oh, and by the way, please stock the shelves and mop the floor as you drop off the check. And please tell your friends to shop here. Because if they come in on your referral - you can pay me an extra fifty bucks.

Your instructor is like a dog licking his balls. He does it because he can.

 

[bumblebee19]

Thanks to everyone who responded. I didn't really expect that many replies.

To answer a few questions - I live in a pretty rural area. The next closest school is 30 minutes away, and as I already have a long commute to work, that distance doesn't seem feasible. As for training in TKD by myself, I have thought about that. However, I don't see the point in paying someone else for that. I do see the value in teaching, it's just not something I enjoy doing every time I go into class. On days that I had a stressful or busy time at work, I found it especially difficult to enjoy teaching. I miss the days of being able to go in and train hard after a long day.

I do need to talk to the instructor. I had a slight knee injury, so I haven't been in classes for a while. And I guess while I was rehabbing, I got to thinking about the past few months and how I wasn't happy with how TKD was going. Part of my irritation is he seems unwilling to break the classes up based on rank - not even just separate classes but if there was a red belt and a white belt in class, he'd have both do white belt material the entire class. Which is good for review, but not when it's happening class after class. A few of us used to stay late after one class to pactice the higher belt material together (by ourselves, no help from the instructor), but the change in my work schedule made it very difficult to stay that late.

 

[PhotonGuy]

I officially decided to quit taekwondo. I haven't been happy at my dojo for a while and I finally decided it doesn't make sense to do something I no longer enjoy. It kind of sucks since I was about 10 months away from getting my black belt.

The biggest issue is my instructor was making me teach classes and no longer training me - and I was expected to continue paying the regular student fee. When one of our student instructors left, I was pushed into helping cover the classes. I was a little worried about pushing back on him too much as I was so close to my black belt. I didn't want him to retaliate by not letting me take my black belt test.

However, things started getting worse. The master instructor stopped doing advanced belt training or any type of advanced self defense. The classes were all open classes (for all ranks) and he focused solely on teaching the lower ranking belts. Higher belts just basically had a review class of the lower material. He said that because I was a "high" ranking student, I shouldn't even take classes but either teach or help teach classes. My own training was expected to be done on my own time (and without anyone critiquing me or pushing me to get better). I know that black belts are expected to help teach but I never wanted to be solely an instructor. I always thought when I got my black belt, I'd continue to learn new things and continue to grow as a martial artist. I haven’t even sparred in over a year. Someone asked me what type of training I would do after I got my black belt and I realized that there was no training - I just would have to attend 2 years worth of "classes" (aka show up and teach) and pretty much be given my 2nd degree black belt.

I also felt like the instructor was taking advantage of me a bit, by expecting me to pay to teach his classes. I was a regular attendee of classes for several years. I was one of those students you could always count on being there. And instead of continuing to help me grow as a martial artist, I feel like he's taken advantage of my loyalty to the school. I also feel like he's worried about the school itself since we are small. He focuses so much on keeping new students, that he forgets about his advanced students. I realize now why so many students left when they were a high colored belt/new black belt. There was also a liability concern - the instructor regularly left the building during classes and I was left alone teaching. If someone accidently got hurt, I was worried if I would be held liable.

It's sad because I really enjoyed the past few years there. But it doesn't seem like the school is a good fit for me anymore. I'm not sure what I'm doing next, but for now I'm taking a break from martial arts.

Your instructor doesn't sound like he's all that responsible of an instructor. With what you say in your post I got the impression that you've been training at this Tae Kwon Do school for quite some time, years at the least. It's a shame that you're quitting a school that you've devoted your time, effort, and commitment to, only to find out that in the long run its not the right school for you. Maybe you should stick it out until you at least get a black belt, that's what I would do, but the choice is yours. I hope your satisfied with whatever you decide to do.

 

[PhotonGuy]

As for the black belt who cares it's a piece of fabric just find a new place or train yourself

Its not a piece of fabric its a rank.
The fabric is just a symbol of the rank.

 

[Monkey Turned Wolf]

Thanks to everyone who responded. I didn't really expect that many replies.

To answer a few questions - I live in a pretty rural area. The next closest school is 30 minutes away, and as I already have a long commute to work, that distance doesn't seem feasible. As for training in TKD by myself, I have thought about that. However, I don't see the point in paying someone else for that. I do see the value in teaching, it's just not something I enjoy doing every time I go into class. On days that I had a stressful or busy time at work, I found it especially difficult to enjoy teaching. I miss the days of being able to go in and train hard after a long day.

I do need to talk to the instructor. I had a slight knee injury, so I haven't been in classes for a while. And I guess while I was rehabbing, I got to thinking about the past few months and how I wasn't happy with how TKD was going. Part of my irritation is he seems unwilling to break the classes up based on rank - not even just separate classes but if there was a red belt and a white belt in class, he'd have both do white belt material the entire class. Which is good for review, but not when it's happening class after class. A few of us used to stay late after one class to pactice the higher belt material together (by ourselves, no help from the instructor), but the change in my work schedule made it very difficult to stay that late.

One other option that a lot of people dont realize...depending on your work schedule, if you work in a more populated area, there are likely some schools near there. Look at their schedules and see if any are open before/after your work, where you could go to work, go to class then come home. Obviously not something everyone can do, but something to consider.

The other option is, if you mean the next closest TKD school (rather than the next closest martial arts school) is 30 minutes away, you could start training in a different style as a break for a bit.

 

[KenpoMaster805]

You are not alone it happens if you wanna leave you can leave no body's stoping u and if you wanna search another Martial artist in your Area you can

 

[Headhunter]

Its not a piece of fabric its a rank.
The fabric is just a symbol of the rank.

And what does that rank really mean? I've seen plenty of useless black belts who got given it when they don't deserve it. If the op got his black belt then he'd get w black belt even though he's not actually done any training in class. What matters is your ability not some silly rank. I've seen yellow belts who are better than some black belts so really rank doesn't mean a thing

 

[pdg]

And what does that rank really mean? I've seen plenty of useless black belts who got given it when they don't deserve it. If the op got his black belt then he'd get w black belt even though he's not actually done any training in class. What matters is your ability not some silly rank. I've seen yellow belts who are better than some black belts so really rank doesn't mean a thing

As has been stated a great number of times, there's no national or international standard so to you or me another person's rank outside our own sphere means nothing.

But, the rank means what it means to the organisation, it means what it means to the school and most importantly, it means what it means to the individual.

As an example, it could represent how far the individual has developed from where they started - what place is it of yours to belittle that for them?

Just because you don't personally agree with that particular interpretation of what a BB means it doesn't give you any right to say it's undeserved.

I'm quite sure there are more than a few that don't deserve the rank, but it's certainly not my place - or yours - to stand in judgement of which individual is deserving. Not unless you or I control the standards they train to.

Those yellow belts who were 'better' than black belts - in what way we're they better? If the way they were better in your eyes matters to you, does it matter to anyone else? Did you know their history? Were they 3 months off their couch and had made comparatively greater gains than a black belt who has spent 4 years using MA training to help recover from a spinal injury that doctors said would mean they'd never walk again?


Quite frankly, your opinion of what rank means to anyone else is the thing that's meaningless.

 

[Headhunter]

As has been stated a great number of times, there's no national or international standard so to you or me another person's rank outside our own sphere means nothing.

But, the rank means what it means to the organisation, it means what it means to the school and most importantly, it means what it means to the individual.

As an example, it could represent how far the individual has developed from where they started - what place is it of yours to belittle that for them?

Just because you don't personally agree with that particular interpretation of what a BB means it doesn't give you any right to say it's undeserved.

I'm quite sure there are more than a few that don't deserve the rank, but it's certainly not my place - or yours - to stand in judgement of which individual is deserving. Not unless you or I control the standards they train to.

Those yellow belts who were 'better' than black belts - in what way we're they better? If the way they were better in your eyes matters to you, does it matter to anyone else? Did you know their history? Were they 3 months off their couch and had made comparatively greater gains than a black belt who has spent 4 years using MA training to help recover from a spinal injury that doctors said would mean they'd never walk again?


Quite frankly, your opinion of what rank means to anyone else is the thing that's meaningless.

Lol did I hurt your feelings? Well I'm not sorry I'm allowed my opinion and that's my opinion. Don't like it? I don't care.

My opinion means just as much as yours if mine is meaningless then so is yours.

You say I have "no right" to say anything. Yes I do I have the right to say whatever I like its this thing called free speech. I'm not changing my opinion or hiding my opinion just to suit other people

 

[pdg]

Lol did I hurt your feelings? Well I'm not sorry I'm allowed my opinion and that's my opinion. Don't like it? I don't care.

My opinion means just as much as yours if mine is meaningless then so is yours.

You say I have "no right" to say anything. Yes I do I have the right to say whatever I like its this thing called free speech. I'm not changing my opinion or hiding my opinion just to suit other people

Didn't hurt my feelings at all.

And I never said my opinion was anything other than just as worthless as yours.

Free speech is one thing, bullying is another - and pointing at an individual and saying they don't deserve what they have is nothing above an attempt at inflating your own ego by dragging them down.

 

[Headhunter]

Didn't hurt my feelings at all.

And I never said my opinion was anything other than just as worthless as yours.

Free speech is one thing, bullying is another - and pointing at an individual and saying they don't deserve what they have is nothing above an attempt at inflating your own ego by dragging them down.

WTF?...who have I bullied? You name the person that I have "bullied"

 

[PhotonGuy]

And what does that rank really mean? I've seen plenty of useless black belts who got given it when they don't deserve it. If the op got his black belt then he'd get w black belt even though he's not actually done any training in class. What matters is your ability not some silly rank. I've seen yellow belts who are better than some black belts so really rank doesn't mean a thing

It depends on what you did to get it, that's what it means.
If its a useless black belt who gets it when they don't deserve it, as you put it, than it doesn't mean much, they obviously went to a school with very low standards.
Getting the rank if first dan at a good school with a good solid reputation that has high standards obviously means much more than having it handed to you at some rinky dink school with very low standards.

 

[Leviathan]

That's a sad story. Some trainers definitely don't deserve the respect they want. Yours obviously feels safe you're not gonna quit close to getting your black belt and he has been abusing it.

You may try talking with your trainer but I think it's a lost cause: he cannot have overlooked that.

In Bill Mattock's thread ("new student, when will you quit?") I had mentioned the trainer was sometimes the reason a student would quit. That drove mad a few guys who obviously were too closed minded to even consider that possibility. Well, you make my case with this thread.

My advice: quit that abusive trainer and find another tkd trainer or another martial art that fits you. You deserve much better.

 

[jobo]

It depends on what you did to get it, that's what it means.
If its a useless black belt who gets it when they don't deserve it, as you put it, than it doesn't mean much, they obviously went to a school with very low standards.
Getting the rank if first dan at a good school with a good solid reputation that has high standards obviously means much more than having it handed to you at some rinky dink school with very low standards.

I don't usually agree with headhunter, but really it doesn't, it depends entirely on what value you decided to put on it, only you know achieving it has translated to something of tangable value , or if it's some validati of time/ money effort exspended

if it's of tangible value, then the belt is completly meaningless, its value lies else where, if it's just external validation then its completely meaningless, either way its meaningless, beyond the value you choose to attached to it for physiological reasons,,
when I pass a belt they give me a nicely embosed certificate, I throw it in the bin outside, its not even worth the trouble if carrying home