Missing person
- Thread starter terryl965
- Start date
Well, you've got to wade through all of us first to get it and there is little chance of survival for you if you do.
grydth
Senior Master
Ha! I fear no man and just one woman....... and my wife is not amongst you.
Why wade when one can sneak in the shadows?
Two things I love the smell of: chocolate and currency.
Why wade when one can sneak in the shadows?
Two things I love the smell of: chocolate and currency.
Salvage? Chocolate? You don't know us very well, do you? I'm not saying there is any chocolate but I do know that if there is any that there will be none left. Not a crumb, a sliver, an atom. You won't even be able to smell it. It will be gone. ALL Gone. Finito. Tan muerto.
Let's put it this way - do you know what it takes to make 41000 pounds of chocolate disappear without a trace? Yet we can do it. A 150-300 lb. human male? Pff. No problem.
That you know of.
Beware the shadows near our turf - though they be dark they most certainly are not empty.
That's the smartest thing you've said. Really. I mean it. I might even like you for it. But I'm kinda busy right now. :EG:
Did someone say "mantis"? *cough*
I suggest you don't concern yourself with Caver, or chocolate. Hey! I just got a great idea! I'm gonna use that Carabiner I *found* to hook a bag of chocolate to my belt loop! Ohhh, this is great!
I suggest you don't concern yourself with Caver, or chocolate. Hey! I just got a great idea! I'm gonna use that Carabiner I *found* to hook a bag of chocolate to my belt loop! Ohhh, this is great!
grydth
Senior Master
NOTICE
Having been duly served with a writ of Habeas Choclatus, it be in my better interest for you to comply immediately. If you do so now, we will even accept MA back. If not, let all of you latter day Harpies beware - those jailed indefinitely on contempt charges get no chocolate.
I scoff at any inference that my most feared and loved wife is amongst your scurvy gang. She would need no pretext to terrorize me, and in any event prefers a healthy <yuck!> diet with awful substances like tofu in it. If my wife caught me fearing another woman, she would consider it unfaithfulness and the consequences are unthinkable.
Further, I have no fear of all these implied threats of cannibalism. One being what they eat, you will find no nutritional value in me; I am only tough hide, hair, bones and fat.... should you dare devour me you will look and feel bloated and will look terrible in your favorite outfits.
So there.
Having been duly served with a writ of Habeas Choclatus, it be in my better interest for you to comply immediately. If you do so now, we will even accept MA back. If not, let all of you latter day Harpies beware - those jailed indefinitely on contempt charges get no chocolate.
I scoff at any inference that my most feared and loved wife is amongst your scurvy gang. She would need no pretext to terrorize me, and in any event prefers a healthy <yuck!> diet with awful substances like tofu in it. If my wife caught me fearing another woman, she would consider it unfaithfulness and the consequences are unthinkable.
Further, I have no fear of all these implied threats of cannibalism. One being what they eat, you will find no nutritional value in me; I am only tough hide, hair, bones and fat.... should you dare devour me you will look and feel bloated and will look terrible in your favorite outfits.
So there.
Geez. And I thought people who love the smell of money and chocolate were smart.
I'll tell your lovely lady you said so. *rips up fake document scribbled on Hershey wrapper*
newGuy12
Master of Arts
Yes, the LEOs may be compromised, but we can now retain the attorneys! Hahahahaha!
Dear Madam:
This CEASE AND DESIST ORDER is to inform you that your and the Chocolate
Eater's harassing and intimidating actions against my fellow
users and I has become unbearable. Such anti-social behavior is
completely unacceptable and will not be tolerated in any way, shape or
form. This letter is to demand that your and the Chocolate Eaters
continuing involvement in, planning and encouragement of,
high-pressure recruitment, information gathering, harassment and
intimidation must CEASE AND DESIST immediately. Should you and the
Chocolate Eaters continue to pursue these activities in violation of this
CEASE AND DESIST ORDER, we will not hesitate to pursue further legal
action against you and the Chocolate Eaters, including, but not limited
to, civil action and/or criminal complaints.
Myself and my peers have a right to remain free from the Chocolate Eaters
cultic, intimidating, manipulative and high-pressure tactics, and we
will take the responsibility upon ourselves to protect that right.
Note that a copy of this letter and a record of its delivery will be
stored. Note too that it is admissible as evidence in a court of law
and will be used as such if need be in the future.
This CEASE AND DESIST ORDER demands that you immediately discontinue
and do not at any point in the future under any circumstances do the
following to me: speak to, contact, pursue, harass, attack, strike,
bump into, brush up against, push, tap, grab, hold, threaten,
telephone (via cellular or landline), instant message, page, fax,
email, follow, stalk, shadow, disturb my peace, keep me under
surveillance, gather information about and/or block my movements at
home, work, social gatherings, religious functions and/or at any
activities.
Very truly yours,
NewGuy12
thardey
Master Black Belt
I do know that there's no such thing as "Too much chocolate." I also know better than to even have the scent of chocolate on myself. So, I spent last night depositing chocolate accounts in various currencies (turtles, chocolate covered cherries, fudge, etc.) in various undisclosed locations. I also sent a large fudge bar to my lawyer to be unwrapped publicly, should anything "accidental" happen to me.
I'm not out to get anyone. I just have chocolate, and you have information. This could turn out very well for everybody involved. I don't particularly have any use for the chocolate, I just want to see it go to someone who would enjoy it!
Wow. All these Notices and Cease and desist orders. You silly little minions. One can not fight what one does not understand. We are omnipotent and scoff at your little orders. I would be watching my user titles in the near future if you continue down these roads. :EG:
What kind of information you looking for? Maybe I can help you. Come a little closer, don't be scared :angel:
thardey
Master Black Belt
Why does the phrase "biting the hand that feeds you" come into mind?
Here, Chew, have a squeaky penguin!
Take note: If Chew is biting you, you are not feeding Chew ... Chew is feeding on you.
All these newbies need to know how things werk around here!
Lisa, I'll hold him and you can punch first. :EG:
:bangahead:
Alright. I'll let you keep that one. There are plenty of Caver's carabiners left. Great idea, why not? We each in the LLR can use one to carry our stash.
grydth
Senior Master
I believe this is known as an "Order of Confection" :wink2:
Well, looks like Helga's slacking again. She's big and beautiful but short in the brains department. We best intervene here ladies.
OP
- Thread Starter
- #57
So no caver and chew is involved great I need to go on Vacation
I'm having a flashback to "the Gimp" in Pulp Fiction...
I just watched that movie yesterday. *closes eyes, breathes in deeply*
Ahh. Inspiring. :angel:
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