Methodology of self-defense in five words or less

Also, disclaimer time: this thread was not intended to be serious in any way, shape or form -- just looking for funny self-defense themed puns (five word thing optional). At this point in my training I don't necessarily feel confident teaching someone how to tie their belt -- never mind educate them on the finer points of self defense.

My two buddies were having a hard time remembering the order of the moves on the first ten self defense forms and getting anxious, so I was trying to ease them up before the test. Plus, they're peers. I'd sooner punch myself in the boob (hard) than say something like that in front of the little kids, or anyone else that might actually take me seriously. Cheers!
 
KISS

Keep it simple stupid

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In all fairness, there are many circumstances that would change the above scenario a bit.

Where I was attacked, geographically. (Which was covered, but we don't all hang in book stores and church every time we go out.) :)

Did it come without warning.

Certain jobs would compel you to respond differently.

If a loved one that was with you got attacked.

I'm sure there are more, just saying, for some realism.


I see it coming, so as Josh oakley said, this will be my reaction here, below...........

Originally Posted by Josh Oakley Dodge, dip, duck, dive, dodge.
 
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