Can you explain what it is you feel when you're serving God at church? Is it serenity? euphoria? something else? Do you have to be in church to serve God? I've been trying to find out for years and nobody has ever been able to explain it to me. As I said, I find it hard to believe that there is an omnipotent and omniscient entity in the universe that cares any more about me than I do about an insect. On the other hand I find it equally difficult to believe that we are all here because of some cosmic accident and random genetic mutations. My truth and yours is obviously different and I'm wondering if I'm missing something or if I'm on the right track. It's good to re-examine one's beliefs every once in a while.
First, Elder and the rest are right, service to God is abolutely not limited to Church. It's just that for me, while in Church, I'm usually there to serve, not to be served. Also, Church is not a place where I go to "meet God." It's where I go to encourage and encourage others who are dealing with "growing pains." That is the "Great Commision" to make disciples, and by extention, to continue to be a disciple to others.
God is everywhere, he is in me, and in you, and while I may not "see" him everywhere, I see the art he has left behind to tell us what he is like. Like the power of the ocean, the stability of the mountains, the infinity of space, the intricacies of the flower, the sudden shock of the lightening -- they all give me something to understand a God that is much bigger than I can completely understand.
But serving God in general, or "being with him" whether in church, or home, or on the street, or whatever is like being married, a child, a brother, and a parent all rolled into one. Probably marriage is what it's like the most for me right now.
Sometimes, especially at first, there's the "honeymoon" when you're so excited about what you've found, and you can't shut up about how wonderful everything is, to the point where you just annoy everybody. Those who have been through it kind of sit back and let them enjoy it, because they know it won't last forever. Then there's the part where you have to start learning to live together. This is rough. This is often where I get angry at God, and I am quite honest when I tell him that I don't like how he does things. I don't do it in anger, but in honesty. (The Psalms are full of that kind of conversation with God -- those are the ones usually not sung in church. )
This is where many people think they've "fallen out of love" with God, like people "fall out of love" with their spouses. It's a time of not feeling very spiritual, and it's work. But it's also a time of growing. Eventually you get past that and sort of settle into the "old married couple" relationship and, while there are still things that really tick me off about God, the benifits far outweigh the annoyances. Of course, like marriage, you still go through the cycle on a small scale over and over, with times of emotional high, times of brutal reality, and times of rest. But one of the pictures described often in the Bible is that of marriage. "The Bride" is the Church, and the Messiah is the groom.
Overlaid with that, the magnitude of God feels like my parents, both of whom were great parents, and I have a lot of respect for them, and am close to both. When I was young, they had so much to teach me, but they taught me at the right times, and let me figure out a lot, without ever pulling away from me, or being "untouchable." Service is like being a parent, because I am helping to disciple others, who I want to teach, but I have to be patient with them, like I am with my kids. Also, I think of how I love my kids, and realize, whether I "feel" it or not, that's how God feels about me.
I've been in services where I was overwhelmed with emotion, and it wasn't bad, but it wasn't anything I would put my faith in. What helps me more is when I learned about "Love" being unconditional -- it is a gift to me, not based on what I've earned, but because of who God made me to be. It's not pity, or false modesty, or anything, but it is the true reaction to the "Spark of God" within all of us. "Created in God's image." Not in his power, or his infinity, or his royalty, but in his "personality." Like I have chacter traits of my real parents, so we all have character traits of our "Heavenly Father." The question is whether we develop them.
There was another thread that recently resurfaced about "Spirit: the forgotten third part of the triangle." And it would be easier to just read what I wrote
there about being controlled by the spirit, rather than the body.
A lot of my spiritual life feels a lot like martial arts -- sometimes it's frustrating and I wonder if I'm wasting my time, other times the lightbulb comes on and I realize that I was just thinking about it wrong.
I get suspicious about people who constantly over-spiritualize everything -- it's like people who brag too much about their uber-martial arts skills. They're exaggerating because they're insecure.
Someone once described it as "Supernaturally Natural."
As I said, I find it hard to believe that there is an omnipotent and omniscient entity in the universe that cares any more about me than I do about an insect.
Not to be a nitpick, but if there is an omniscient being out there, then he knows *everything* by definition. That means he knows you personally. If he knows you personally, then of course he can care about you. If he was less than omniscient, or too pressed for time to care about what he knows, then he wouldn't be big enough to be God, would he?
I once heard an athiest claim that he didn't believe in God because he couldn't imagine that God hears everybody's prayers. Well, if God couldn't hear everybody's prayers, then he wouldn't really be omniscient. I wouldn't believe in a god that small either.
