If I keep repeating myself

[Transk53]

Nothing wrong with legitimate therapy. The days when it was seen as a taboo perhaps, have disappeared. In many respects there probably is too much diagnosed as needed. I remember a time when Prozac was dished out like sweets. At the time when I was diagnosed as having severe depression, which quite frankly was horrible, I volunteered at an animal shelter for a while and that was tremendous help. Nothing wrong with therapy, but it has to be tactile IMHO.

At the very least in a place where one can off load with the correct stimulus. A forum cannot be unless you personally know someone with which to confide in. Even though, I still think facetime is needed with a human or an animal. Dogs are good like that because they can silently feel the vibes of a person, and the environment does not have to be the age old bloke in a white coat sitting down with pen and paper.

 

[Tez3]

Apparently this! Although as soon as drop bear said it, I thought something else.

A group of people jumping on on person and creating a tower of people while crushing the people on bottom.
If some one falls over everyone nearby jumps on him/her thus creating a dog pile.

What about though someone who lies down and invites people to jump on him?

 

[Cirdan]

I do, and the reason I keep doing that is because Im trying to make a point, and Im just not making the point even though I keep trying using different examples, and it can go on for gazillion times. I don't like it anymore than anyone else here, its really frustrating not being able to make a point no matter how many times I try.

Just maybe you should ask questions instead of trying make a point all the time then?

This is really intended as good advice mind you, that might actually benefit you, so no need to report me or anything

 

[Transk53]

What about though someone who lies down and invites people to jump on him?

I really am not sure how to answer this one

 

[drop bear]

What about though someone who lies down and invites people to jump on him?

 

[Transk53]

LOL

 

[Buka]

We are fortunate to live in a time that we can get advice on therapy from an Internet forum. I hooked up with a therapist just last week on-line.
That's me with the mustache -

I have since shaved off the stache. I'm better now.

 

[Transk53]

@Buka. LOL

 

[Chris Parker]

Hmm. Okay.

I am getting help. How? By discussing it here.

That is absolutely not you "getting help". It is, if anything (scratch that… it absolutely is) you engaging in a form of self-enabiling behaviour. It is the opposite to "getting help"… it's actively avoiding it. It's a form of behaviour that is circular and, bluntly, self destructive… there's no "help" for you here in that sense.

But let's assume there is some therapeutic upside to posting here… some way that posting can act as therapy. It would require you to actively not only take on board what you're told (you don't), but work on improving, based on such input. It would also require the responses you get to be far more directed, direct, and singular in their format (the opposing views here kinda goes against the way therapy works, you know)… in short, the way you interact here with the responses you get shows that you're not getting any kind of therapy from us… and frankly, you shouldn't look here for it.

Venting, and repeating your overly literal yet still ill-informed beliefs and views with no ability to take on board what your told is not therapy.

Posting the same threads over and over is not therapy. It's a form of obsessive behaviour.

This is not therapy.

You need the real stuff.

I do, and the reason I keep doing that is because Im trying to make a point, and Im just not making the point even though I keep trying using different examples, and it can go on for gazillion times. I don't like it anymore than anyone else here, its really frustrating not being able to make a point no matter how many times I try.

This is the issue… you're not making any points. You're trying to express your views as to how things should be, and we're telling you what the reality is… I've told you numerous times that what you think things should be like is really irrelevant when you're facing the way things are. So it doesn't matter how many times you post the same thing… if it's not a realistic expectation of the world, posting your desire for the world to be another way won't change it… nor will it get others to agree with you… or make any "point".

I'll put it this way… we have always understood what you're trying to say… each time you post the same thing, we've never had an issue understanding what you're saying… it's just been that what you've been saying is the issue.

really?

i mean if you don't like his threads do we need a discussion on how silly they are?

is anybody actually in a position to make a qualified call on whether someone needs therapy or not?

be a big call to make.

And, as I told you before, you really don't seem to have a grasp on the background, context, and relevant information.

As for "why do we need to have a discussion on (the threads)?", well, there's a number of reasons for that… one major one is that, well, this is a discussion forum… we discuss things here. Another is that, well, those are the kinds of responses such threads and posts dictate and require. In a very real way, it is an attempt to give the best advice we can… and I can say that definitively in my case.

"Is anybody actually in a position to make a qualified call…?" Yes. On this board? Let's play coy and say… possibly… there's certainly more than enough evidence to suggest it quite strongly.

completely different.

not an inherent victim. A victim of a specific circumstance. In this case a dog pile. It is not a veiled insult.

i read the Bruce lee thread. Posters are already using the therapy line.

If he's a victim of anything, to be blunt, he's a victim of his own issues and behaviours. He's not a victim of "special circumstance"… again, you need to know the background… we didn't just start saying this on his first post, you know…

I second that. It would take a genius, if it would even be possible, to determine if a person needs therapy based on just the posts they make on some message board.

No, not even close. Your posts are absolutely littered with a whole spectrum of indicators, ranging from obsessive behaviour, overly literal interpretation (with no ability to see nuance, metaphor, sarcasm, or anything else relating to inter-personal communication), an inability to filter information either coming into your world view, or that you repeat, and far, far more. I have, previously, questioned if you have been tested for things like autism, or aspbergers syndrome… both fairly wide-ranging conditions, both of which would match your behaviour and presentation method very well… and, it must be emphasised, this was asked (and is continued to be asked) with no malice, or ill-intent. Honestly, if you were to discover such a condition, and tell us, then we would be able to understand why you're having the issues you're having much easier… but you denied it, rather aggressively, so we are left only with either you being undiagnosed, or simply being a person with an incredible range of personality issues.

But really, determining that you need, or would benefit from, some form of (legitimate) therapy (not, and I repeat here, NOT posting the same things here again and again) doesn't take a genius, and is incredibly possible… frankly, it's very easy, once you understand how to recognise patterns, and know what those patterns indicate.

look if you were cutting yourself or posting some sort of self destructive rant. I could see where people might.

i haven't seen you post that.

Do you think that's the only indication of needing therapy? Or, indeed, anything to do with why we're suggesting it here?

He's told us he's in therapy. We're agreeing that he needs it. He's told us that he considers posting here therapy.

Hmm… other than the idea that posting here is "therapy", I haven't seen that… so can I ask Photon Guy to clarify? Are you actually in therapy of any kind?

I'll respond in kind first… I've been involved in various forms of therapeutic methods, on both sides of the couch, so to speak, for the past two decades.

There is if it takes 14,298,476 times to make a point. If you saw the movie Groundhog Day you will know that the day finally does move on when Phil does the right thing. Same thing with me, I might rehash something 14,298.476 times but if and when I finally do make my point, I move on.

You really, really missed the point of that film, then. Phil didn't do the same thing over and over again… he changed each day, improving on the day before. You haven't. In fact, you seemingly can't.

And, again, you aren't "making a point"… you're espousing views that don't gel with reality. Repeating them over and over doesn't make them any more real, nor does it help in making any "point" you think needs to be made.

I don't care, if that's what it takes for me to make a point, I will take the risk of looking foolish.

You're not making any point.

PhotonGuy is a victim of dog pile. You would think after all this time the members that don't like what he has to say would just ignore his threads and comments. But that's not the case. There seems to be a real interest in letting this guy know that he needs therapy and is not worthy of posting on this "friendly" site. It's called dog piling. So, my advice is, just ignore him.

Okay, this one I find raises some interesting points… but, at the outset, I'll say that I'm in complete disagreement, Tames… sorry…

Let's take it bit by bit. Is Photon Guy the victim of a dog pile? Well… kinda. But it really should be understood what's actually triggering these "dog piles" to take place… and, honestly, it's not really the membership here. You say that those that "don't like what he says" should just ignore his threads and comments… it's not really that simple, either. It's not a matter of "not liking" what he says… it's a matter of his posting certain beliefs, or statements… occasionally questions… asking for comment. So, we comment. And the first thing that is often needing to be said is to point out how at odds with reality many of the things he posts are. He then continues to repeat the same thing over and over, which leads to a certain amount of frustration with those trying to engage his postings… really, we start out trying to help him get a better understanding… and it really can't be overstated that it's taken a while to get to this point.

Your comment on there being a "real interest" in telling him he needs some form of therapy, well, that's us trying to help him. I have to say, though, I've never seen anyone tell him he's not worthy, not welcome, or anything else limiting his posting on the site… he is welcome here, he is worthy to post, as much as anyone, he's not (consciously, at least) trolling… or, if he is, it's one hell of an impressive job… but he needs to understand that his posts will garner a response… and that response might not be what he expects, or wants to hear.

Just ignore him? No… that's no good for anyone. It may lead to a bit less conflict, but there will be no actual positive benefit. He'd end up like BillC, alienated and largely talking to himself… not "getting his point across", nor getting any genuine advice or help (in his understanding, correction, or anything else)… and the regular posters would simply get frustrated.

As a matter of fact, I should start reporting posts from people who say I need therapy or help, as I do find them offensive.

Go ahead, there's nothing stopping you. Of course, I might point out that simply reporting the posts doesn't mean that others will agree with your interpretation of the situation… and constantly reporting posts for the same reason, especially if it's deemed that it's not what you think it is, might see some infractions coming back your way for abusing the report system… but it's up to you.

Instead, though, I recommend you take on board why so many people are saying the same thing… it's not a conspiracy, you realise.

 

[MJS]

There is if it takes 14,298,476 times to make a point. If you saw the movie Groundhog Day you will know that the day finally does move on when Phil does the right thing. Same thing with me, I might rehash something 14,298.476 times but if and when I finally do make my point, I move on.

So, what exactly is the point of this thread?? Actually, doing what you're suggesting, has the risk of walking the fine line of trolling the forum.

 

[Transk53]

So, what exactly is the point of this thread?? Actually, doing what you're suggesting, has the risk of walking the fine line of trolling the forum.

Personally would advise against a ban. Not sure what is going on, but I think he is seeking an answer. Maybe a troll, but in this instance maybe not. A gut feeling that could be wrong, but PG , what is it that you want? PM if you wish.

 

[Steve]

"Is anybody actually in a position to make a qualified call…?" Yes. On this board? Let's play coy and say… possibly… there's certainly more than enough evidence to suggest it quite strongly.
anything to do with why we're suggesting it here?

Whoa!!!

Easy, Chris. "Coy" is a very, very, very insulting term, not to be used lightly or said in polite company.

 

[K-man]

Whoa!!!

Easy, Chris. "Coy" is a very, very, very insulting term, not to be used lightly or said in polite company.

Coy in context is fine. Coy as an insult is not. Some people have difficulty with context. Even if I called Chris a cantankerous bastard odds on he wouldn't be railing against the bastard tag. He would be arguing that he wasn't cantankerous, an arguement he won't win anyway.

 

[Steve]

Coy in context is fine. Coy as an insult is not. Some people have difficulty with context. Even if I called Chris a cantankerous bastard odds on he wouldn't be railing against the bastard tag. He would be arguing that he wasn't cantankerous, an arguement he won't win anyway.

LOL. You're so full of it.

 

[Tames D]

Chris, it really IS that simple to ignore him (I won't quote your entire post, it's a little too long. If you really want to help him, then walk away. Stop adding tothe dogpile.

 

[Tames D]

What about though someone who lies down and invites people to jump on him?

Who says he's asking for you to jump on him? Is a girl who wears sexy clothes inviting rape?

 

[Steve]

Who says he's asking for you to jump on him? Is a girl who wears sexy clothes inviting rape?

 

[Tez3]

Who says he's asking for you to jump on him? Is a girl who wears sexy clothes inviting rape?

Who is 'he'? and who says it has to be a sexy woman?

 

[Chris Parker]

Whoa!!!

Easy, Chris. "Coy" is a very, very, very insulting term, not to be used lightly or said in polite company.

Really, Steve? You're going to simply ignore the differences in contexts and usages of the word there to make a dig?

As you're fond of telling me… you're better than that.

Coy in context is fine. Coy as an insult is not. Some people have difficulty with context. Even if I called Chris a cantankerous bastard odds on he wouldn't be railing against the bastard tag. He would be arguing that he wasn't cantankerous, an arguement he won't win anyway.

Actually, cantankerous I'd very openly agree with… or grumpy…. or any of that ilk, really… as for the other term, well… my folks were married for a while before I came along… so…

Chris, it really IS that simple to ignore him (I won't quote your entire post, it's a little too long. If you really want to help him, then walk away. Stop adding tothe dogpile.

No, it's not that simple… I mean, sure, it's simple to ignore him… or to not respond… but what I was meaning was that "helping" was not that simple… and no, walking away isn't the best option, nor the best for Photon Guy, the board, or the threads in question. That's what makes it not that simple. Walking away simply leads to a continuance of the personally enabling behaviour… which is the last thing he needs.

 

[MJS]

Thread locked for review.