how to deal with fear in a street fight

This has been beat to death at this point and most of the posts are correct. It's such a compelling subject though that I couldn't resist responding to it. Even if I just cover the same ground again.

I've been practicing martial arts for 23 years now. I've been in maybe two actual real world engagements since learning it. One was absolutely life and death with a weapon involved.

No amount of training makes fear go away. Both times I was terrified! All I can say is just keep breathing, in and out, in and out. It's okay to run away. On my last and most dangerous encounter I couldn’t run away because I had my two small children with me. I had no choice but to fight. I was scared for myself and scared even more so for my kids.

I think the thing that helped me most was the feeling that okay I have to fight and I could die but that's okay. The only thing that matters is my kids. At that moment much of the fear burned off because I accepted the possibility of death and dismissed it as not really a big deal, not compared to my kids.

Try to buy yourself some time. Keep moving. Most engagements are pretty brief, they feel like an eternity but I bet most are less than two minutes long.

The adrenalin is really going wreck refined motor skills. You have greater strength but less fine motor. Protect your core and your head. If you have to catch something nasty it's better to get in an arm.

Don’t try a bunch of fancy moves. Breath in, breath out, chin down, hands up, and keep your balance. Don't be afraid to grab the nearest chair and use it as a shield. Make your moves count, you might only get one or two.

Also I suggest getting a friend in your class to grab you once in awhile and drag you around the room, push you into things, say terrible things to you. Rough you up and make life hard for you. Essentially desensitize you to some of the things that trigger terror. With my students' I occasionally step it up to near real world and make them afraid. You can see the fear response. A couple of times I've had to ask them not to hurt me and to remind them that I am merely teaching them. I tell them that I am going to play act like a bully, mugger, rapist, bar drunk, etc. Then we role play it out. I shout at them and do what I think that evil person might do. Then after words we talk about what happened and how it might have gone differently. We are all still friendly after words and it gives them confidence for when these nasty little incidences crop up in the real world, that they have seen this before and they know what to do.
 
Hi guys, hoping to find to some help here on an issue that is mentally messing me up.

Firstly I would like to stress that I'm not a trouble maker and do not go around looking for trouble either.

Recently I got involved in a street fight and to say the least, I lost. I didn't lose cause I was floored, knocked out etc, but because I simply didn't know what the hell to do. When I was being hit I couldn't move forward to strike I was simply FROZEN. My emotions at the time went into negativity and instead of attacking and progressing forward I was allowing myself to be defeated.
Also just before the fight kicked off, my legs went jelly and I was scared beyond belief, despite not knowing who my attacker actually would be.

My question is to you guys is what is wrong with me and why did that happen? Im mentally beating myself up because I didn't do anything, please advise appropriately.

Nathan,
What you experienced is natural and is one of the prime reasons why many martial artists even highly regarded ones often find their skills disappear when faced with a street confrontation. My advice to you based upon what has worked for me is as follows.
  1. learn to hit hard, very hard! hit bags, hit pads and hit sparring partners. Develop real confidence that you have the power to do damage.
  2. spar / practice defence scenarios hard. Train with a real threat of being knocked out / hurt. Develop confidence that you can deal with random attacks thrown with real intent and also realise that you are harder to put down than you think.
  3. Is there anything else that you have fear of? heights, spiders etc it doesn't have to be a phobia just something that gets your pulse going. If there is use exposure to it to trigger an adrenalin dump (if you don't have any general fears, try a theme park or parachute jump, track time with a pro racer etc) try to remember the feelings. If appropriate try practicing a couple of basic responses whilst the feelings are fresh, if not try to anchor the feelings by giving yourself a signal eg pinching your ear and repeat the whole thing a few times. When you are training scenarios give yourself the signal to try and replicate the feelings
  4. Use visualisation to see yourself winning street encounters. For this to work the visualisation has to be realistic and you should try to recapture some of those feelings of shaking legs, sinking stomach etc.
Hope it helps
 
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