Just to add my 2 cents, though it may not be needed after all these posts, I have a bit of a "gun shy" disposition as well. I am actually a second dan BB, I'm 20 and I've been training for 13 years.(never shot anything living either). I, however, know that I can release the full extent of my force and ability because I have been in full contact competitions. This, though still a sport with rules, was a good indicator for me that I could release if I needed to. I have never had to go beyond joint locks and actually fight a person, so I don't know what would happen in actual combat, but I have a feeling I would be fine.
My gun shy problem I believe is from working with lower ranks almost all the time, there aren't many ppl at the level I am at in my small town, in fact, they are either below me or they are the few above me, there are no equals in rank and/or experience(not trying to be arrogant, just stating that my experience is a lot for the area I'm in, though it doesnt come close to the higher up instructors in my area). The way I let out my full power is on the heavy bags, it is a good way to get used to practicing at full power. Nobody gets hurt, so you don't have to fear that, and it is ok if you start out below max power and build up to it, just get your adrenaline flowin and it will all fall into place. It is good to have the confidence to know that you can pull it out when you need it, in case you ever have to.
My gun shy problem I believe is from working with lower ranks almost all the time, there aren't many ppl at the level I am at in my small town, in fact, they are either below me or they are the few above me, there are no equals in rank and/or experience(not trying to be arrogant, just stating that my experience is a lot for the area I'm in, though it doesnt come close to the higher up instructors in my area). The way I let out my full power is on the heavy bags, it is a good way to get used to practicing at full power. Nobody gets hurt, so you don't have to fear that, and it is ok if you start out below max power and build up to it, just get your adrenaline flowin and it will all fall into place. It is good to have the confidence to know that you can pull it out when you need it, in case you ever have to.