I 'll have a little more time later to address some of the things I've brought up-I'm kinda delighted with this discussion and the way it has progressed-there are a few other things that I think might need some quick housekeeping on my part.
Way upthread,we had this post:
I never teach students to use a "style" or even a martial art. I teach them to use approaches that don't require years to develop the skill. I make sure they understand that complicated moves and fine motor skills will leave them so use basic concepts and principles. When attacked, no one is in the "proper" mindset and they WILL be at a disadvantage. However, 95% of what I do recommend to them does come from martial arts.
Specifically, weapons first. Always be armed even if it is nothing more than a ballpoint pen, I tell them; but a knife or gun is best. Since most do not carry guns or knives the emphasis is on "environmental weapons", items to be naturally found on or around them. I, myself carry knives, rarely a gun; and since I need a cane to walk that becomes my primary weapon.
Secondly, I teach them that there is no such thing as self defense. Reason being that defense is a response to a prior advantage directed at them; you can't punch backing up, so to speak. What I prepare them to do is at the moment it appears an attack is forthcoming YOU become the aggressor. I think most people know when something bad is about to come down so it makes no sense to politely give the thug first dibs. In such situations you must EXPLODE into a violent and loud attack with everything and anything you know or have with you. Any attacker should not be left in a condition to regain his feet for at least a good while. The results of your initial action, they are instructed, will determine what your next move will be; be it to quickly leave the area or stay around. Always, I tell them, always call the police asap. Often the police don't like the idea of people protecting themselves but this fascist attitude is their problem, not yours.
Basically these are my pillars of self protection. There's more, of course, but this is the basic outline.
The "practical" parts of which were.......
interesting.....I just need to say that in the original actual event that led to this thread being started, the woman was ambushed and tackled. Most people who train weapons don't seem to include deploying a weapon from such a compromised position: I've trained with knives for....well, for a long time, now, and I had to seek out training on getting the knife out and using it in just this situation. Ditto-especially-firearms. In fact, I've had policemen who were more than a little helpless in this situation: I've taken them down and not only kept them from getting to their (Airsoft) pistol, I've controlled them with their duty belt, and often taken the pistol (don't usually like to scare the cops....)..then shown them how to fill in the gaps in their 6 months at the academy.....
As for the discenment and use of "environmental weapons," thatt could be a whole other thread...
Seems a bit like false advertising really. People tend to equate self defense with fighting prowess. Essentially a person who could fight was well adept at defending themselves against someone doing them harm.
It seems rather bizarre to hear instructors say that the point isn't to fight at all. Well if that's the point, why are you teaching people how to kill someone for the vast majority of your class time? That's quite the contradiction.
Of course it would be difficult to fill those training halls with people if you spent the entire lesson teaching about how to de-escalate a situation or turn the other cheek instead of teaching people how to smash windpipes. Right?
Here's a Japanese saying that predates judo, or "karate," never mind BJJ, and comes from a time when martial arts were
martial arts:
"Arasoi no nai
no ga bu
no riso," which means, "
Not to fight is the ideal of martial arts."
That was said by Katayama Hoki no Kami Hisayasu, who lived from 1575 to 1615, and founded the Hoki ryu.....
Of course, we're not really necessarily talking about "martial arts" here as much as we are "self-defense," a distinction that might also take up a whole other thread. In any case, while self defense teaching can and should be mostly the physical techniques of self-defense (as these are the very things that take the most to learn, not necessarily "what people are paying for") , proper training-to be properly "defensive" should, at the very least, include knowing when not to fight, something about de-escalation, and how and when
to run away. 
