JadeDragon3
Black Belt
kicks to the knee & monkey grabs peaches technique (grabbing the testicles) works really good.
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And a few other characters as well as Richard Ames... the point is, in a true self-defense situation, the key factor is to react - and react quickly. What you do is not as important as not freezing.
One of my students told me recently (after a year in class) that the reason she joined was because she was set upon by a pair of girls in her area, who cornered her against a building (she was in the corner) and proceeded to beat on her; she didn't know how to get out, so she just cowered in the corner with her arms over her head. She is determined that this not happen again - that, if she is accosted again like that and can't run, she wants to know how to get out of the situation. Now that she understands that she may have to take a little punishment to get out, she's much more sanguine about her chances than she was before... in fact, she asked this question after class one day, and several of my other students jumped in with suggestions as well, helping her create scenarios and ways to get out of them; "what if" is a wonderful tool to get students thinking about applications and reactions - because your first reaction is what you're likely to do in a real situation.
My point, I guess, is that it doesn't matter what you do - or what you do it with, or how many "dirty tricks" you have up your sleeve - it matters whether you react or freeze when the need is upon you. Now, I realize this may not be in keeping with the original, light-hearted nature of the question - but it's what I've got!
Dirty tricks for street fighting
1. Step on the foot and push backward to straight blast punching
2. Spit into the face and kick the groin
3. Throw dirt, snow, mud, pooo, drink, etc. in their face, and go
4. Grab and rip the shirt pocket, to uppercut to chin
5. Belt grab pull and punch face
6. Coat/sleeve hold and punch
7. Coat lapel choke
8. Pull coat down over arms to trap arms and punch
9. Pull the coat over their head and knee/kick
10. Push over chair, barstool object etc.
11. Pull bottom of t-shirt over their head front/back sides
12. Pull pants down and push over to kick- the way people hang them off rear anyway!
13. Slap in the face
14. Belt whip across mouth
15. flip shoe into face before punch
16. Fist loads, rolled up quarter's
17. Belt around knuckles for protection and harder punching power
18. Use shoes on hands for striking
19. Use clothes for handles and chokes
20. Use your coat for catching punches, kicks, over the head stuff
Here are a few I have used, and a few I have seen work in the street. Let's see what you can add to this? Your idea's welcome
Nubreed
...."There's no such thing as a clean, fair fight!" ...
As for the legal repercussions, if you're a woman being attacked by a (larger, stronger) man who is close enough to you to make a tactic like that work it's already a serious, probably life-threatening situation. "Disparity of force" and all that. It wouldn't be difficult at all to establish that a typical enraged man could beat a typical woman to death if she insisted on "fighting fair" and avoiding techniques that could cause serious damage.
Spinback, turning sideways means the groin isn't a target? Wow. That's going to come as a real surprise to an awful lot of people. My wife just gave you the Ol' Hairy Eyeball and muttered "G-d bless the human elbow, G-d bless it where it bends" (part of an Olde Englishe drinking song). I've seen short petite women perfect the hooking uppercut to the goolies.
And do you know what? I have grabbed guys who were wearing pants by the plums. It worked. My hand didn't slide off. I never did get "stomped for trying". The guys in question tended to get a lot more reasonable very quickly. It's all about being matter of fact about it and not being shy about getting your hand near a guy's wedding tackle or believing that it's a magical thing that will always win the fight.
When my father was still in urological practice he got a number of patients who had been grabbed hard by the tender parts. They tended to arrive in shock, sometimes life-threatening.
It's not the be-all end-all. But it's not as "stupid" (your word) an approach as you seem to think.
As for the legal repercussions, if you're a woman being attacked by a (larger, stronger) man who is close enough to you to make a tactic like that work it's already a serious, probably life-threatening situation. "Disparity of force" and all that. It wouldn't be difficult at all to establish that a typical enraged man could beat a typical woman to death if she insisted on "fighting fair" and avoiding techniques that could cause serious damage.
There are some very VERY tough guys out there; guys who eat pepper-spray for a snack and can take more physical punishment/ignore pain better than the average joe.
"A warrior uses what is at hand there is no shame in this!" Mako playing the role of Chuck Norris' sidekick in some movie I can't remember the title of.