What’s the worst bit of advice you’ve ever received?

[Steve]

And here I am thinking of good advice that I didn't heed over the years.

Some of that too.

 

[Chrisinmd]

Funny thing about this thread is that it's hard for me to actually remember any bad advice. I can think of a lot of good advice that I'm glad I've heeded over the years.

You must have had some wise and good hearted people in your life that cared about you and gave you good advice. Not all of us were so lucky!

 

[Steve]

You must have had some wise and good hearted people in your life that cared about you and gave you good advice. Not all of us were so lucky!

I wonder about that. I mean, yeah, I feel like that's true. But I also wonder if I just don't retain that kind of thing. Believe me, I have had plenty of jackasses in my life, and I'm sure they've given me bad advice. I just don't think I listened to them very closely.

 

[dvcochran]

I so wish I had good carpentry skills. I watch some finished carpenters I know make things and I watch them with wonder in my eyes. There's not just skill involved in good carpentry, there's an art to it.

A close friend of mine out here is a landscaper. When people ask what he does he says "I cut grass for a living." And that's the majority of the work he does.

He earns over 250 grand a year, every year. We call him the Marquise de Sod.

My grandfather and father were carpenters. It just went with the territory growing up. My oldest brother owns a large construction company. My other brother does carpentry regularly in his work. It came easy for them. I have a hard time drawing a straight line with a square in my hand. I can frame no problem but finish carpentry is a whole other level and like you said, an art.
Just not in my blood.

 

[Ivan]

Whew! Have you ever bought completely into the "you must go to college to be someone" lie.

It’s the reality I am living. I am in college now and it honestly feels like a huge waste. The reality is, that it’s such a brainwashing environment it’s insane.

Everyone thinks the same, and God forbid you go against the status quo. I am studying for a degree in computer science which I have no interest in. I have just started my second semester and I have already thought to myself multiple times that I should have enlisted in the army. Though I will admit that I am too scared of deployment to join.

The only reasons I am even moderately attached to staying are due to me not being able to find a job due to the pandemic, and my family refusing to provide any support unless I am studying in uni. I also want to go to an exchange in Japan at the Tokyo university for my third year.

I also plan to get a good job with my degree so that I can earn up to but a place to open a dojo. I am staying in university for literally everything but the education.

Worst advice I’ve ever gotten? Go to university.

 

[jobo]

It’s the reality I am living. I am in college now and it honestly feels like a huge waste. The reality is, that it’s such a brainwashing environment it’s insane.

Everyone thinks the same, and God forbid you go against the status quo. I am studying for a degree in computer science which I have no interest in. I have just started my second semester and I have already thought to myself multiple times that I should have enlisted in the army. Though I will admit that I am too scared of deployment to join.

The only reasons I am even moderately attached to staying are due to me not being able to find a job due to the pandemic, and my family refusing to provide any support unless I am studying in uni. I also want to go to an exchange in Japan at the Tokyo university for my third year.

I also plan to get a good job with my degree so that I can earn up to but a place to open a dojo. I am staying in university for literally everything but the education.

Worst advice I’ve ever gotten? Go to university.

il give you some more advice, qualifications are like having your own gold mine, provived you pick the right ones and computer science sounds good to me. people who only kbow how to change a hard drive/ ram/ processors make a good living out of the fact that most people are clueless.

stick it out, do all your studenty thibgs and turn up for lectures occasionally, or turn on zoom if that what your doing

twenty years from now youl ve glad you didnt throw it sway to get shouted at and occationaly shot at

 

[dvcochran]

It’s the reality I am living. I am in college now and it honestly feels like a huge waste. The reality is, that it’s such a brainwashing environment it’s insane.

Everyone thinks the same, and God forbid you go against the status quo. I am studying for a degree in computer science which I have no interest in. I have just started my second semester and I have already thought to myself multiple times that I should have enlisted in the army. Though I will admit that I am too scared of deployment to join.

The only reasons I am even moderately attached to staying are due to me not being able to find a job due to the pandemic, and my family refusing to provide any support unless I am studying in uni. I also want to go to an exchange in Japan at the Tokyo university for my third year.

I also plan to get a good job with my degree so that I can earn up to but a place to open a dojo. I am staying in university for literally everything but the education.

Worst advice I’ve ever gotten? Go to university.

First and foremost, these comments scare the hell out of me. "(I also plan to get a good job with my degree so that I can earn up to but a place to open a dojo. I am staying in university for literally everything but the education.

Worst advice I’ve ever gotten? Go to university.)"
I do not know you at all but you have always impressed me with your willingness to ask questions. I have no way of knowing what you do with the answers you receive. Asking alone means nothing. Absolutely nothing unless something results form the information.

So, why can you not have some kind of job while you are in school? Simple question that deserves an answer.

I want to tread lightly with you on this. First and most important; is your family (or some other vehicle) fully funding your schooling? If the answer is yes, then this is one of the greatest gifts a person can receive, and waste if they so choose. Youthful perspective can make this very hard to see sometimes. "Wasting" the gift by either wasting your time on a degree that has little to no future potential OR not putting your best effort into the opportunity of knowledge acquired is beyond a slap in the face to yourself and your family. Do not be thinking about your 'today' but be thinking about your days 5 years from now. Not 20 or 30, just 5.
Even people who make the grades but never take the time to really learn the material (and this happens a LOT) are wasting their time. A big, big part of college/university is the social element with the educators and teachers, not with other students (as much as most want you to believe this). Sadly, there is a systemic issue in the school system that allows people to slide through 4-5 years of their life with little positive to show for it. In my opinion, about 70+% of this problem is the students fault. Tools, options, and programs are available to make your time there much, much more valuable for your future. But it is on You to figure these things out. And it needs to be done quickly; not when you are 2/3's of the way through your degree program and realizing the enormous was of time it has been.

If on the other hand you are paying/financing your way I would tell you there are some decisions to be made.
First and foremost: What do you want to do? Not everyone can figure out their life's pathway at 17-19 years old and that is okay. But everyone should be able to set down, alone or with a very trusted advisor, and map out some of the absolutes of a good and satisfying life.
Is your family structure such that you will continue in the "family business"? This completely changes the dynamic IMHO. This is where some long and deep conversations need to happen with you and your family. If you want this to become your future and going to university it is a 'requirement', make your education the best fit for the work. Frankly, if this is your situation it is too family personal for a stranger to be giving you advise.

Some folks on here think I am all about money. That is simply not true. But I very much understand the relationship of input/output. I also understood the time element of it. Simply stated, the sooner anything gets started the sooner it will come to fruition. In other words, the sooner you start developing a hard plan for your future the sooner it begins. Doesn't have to be perfect, and it Will change but starting is the number One thing.
Now, here is where it gets tricky and a crystal ball would come in very handy. If you are driven by the wrong things it will hurt you one way or another. Even is these things seem rather innocuous (MA's for example). Timing has so much to do with this and embracing priority is the single most important thing for a young person to do. Whatever it is; girls, sports, games, etc... must not be given too much weight. While they are satisfying they are sometimes downright seductive. They can chew up all of your time, just adding to the stress and fog of what your real purpose is with university.

I figured out pretty young that: A.) I am not a trust fund kid, B.) no big inheritance in my future and C.) I really was drawn to electrical engineering D.) I wanted to keep farming.

So, A & B obviously told me work was required to have any kind of existence. Sparing you the boring details, I bounced around various job types until I settled into the kind of work field that I spent the rest of my life in. And this pushed me to go back and finish my schooling (2 EE Masters degrees in my late 30'), after my job had solidified into a very good career. To rewind to my early 20's; by 28 I was married, owned 3 businesses, and owned the strip mall my first TKD dojang is/was in. So even though my 'job' was bouncing around somewhat aimlessly, I was not.
My sole point to saying this is to encourage you to Not think there is a singular line or path to your future or your happiness. Grab all of life's riches. But make damn sure you are willing to hang on for the ride and do the work. It Will not and Should not be easy. That is where you will find the most fun in all of it. And just know when and what to let go of.

Now, to be more direct. Why the hell are you wasting your time studying for something you have no interest in? I will say there are good and bad answers to the question but please answer this question before we continue this part of the conversation.

 

[dvcochran]

il give you some more advice, qualifications are like having your own gold mine, provived you pick the right ones and computer science sounds good to me. people who only kbow how to change a hard drive/ ram/ processors make a good living out of the fact that most people are clueless.

stick it out, do all your studenty thibgs and turn up for lectures occasionally, or turn on zoom if that what your doing

twenty years from now youl ve glad you didnt throw it sway to get shouted at and occationaly shot at

I do feel 'qualifications' can only come from applied knowledge. There is not much worse than having someone who has not truly 'been there' trying to tell you 'how' to do something. Pretty much like the guy you get on the phone when you call customer support and know they are reading off a script.

So Ivan, or anyone else can and should get quality education; whether it comes by virtue of formal schooling or training on the job, time and effort are the allies. Just make certain there are no regrets or should haves.
If formal schooling can be had with little to no cost it is a no brainer. What you do with the time invested in on you.

 

[Razznik]

Bullies are only mean because they need a hug XD