The Fear of Failure!

[Brian R. VanCise]

Okay everyone is afraid to fail at something right? However, if you never take the steps that might lead to failure it is hard to sometimes succeed in what you are doing. Personally I am always trying to succeed in what I am doing but I also understand that failure on something comes along with the territory. In regards to the martial arts the absolute best instructors that I have ever witnessed were not afraid to play outside of the box and every now and then that included some failure's. It is and was how they generally then improved and kept going and something that made them very special. So do not be afraid to fail every now and then and think outside the box when you are training.

This thread all came about based on a conversation with a fellow practitioner the other night.

So have you failed at anything lately and what did you learn about that failure?

 

[exile]

So have you failed at anything lately and what did you learn about that failure?

Well, funny you should ask about that...

I was in a tournament this past Saturday competing in forms, and I was doing a hyung—Palgwe Chil Jang—that I know well and have even worked out some preliminary ideas about bunkai for. And I was just humming along until at one point, about 2/3 of the way through, I just blanked on the next move. It was only a fraction of a second, but it showed, and I didn't do very well in the competition, though better than I though I would, given that it was so obvious to the judges that I had blanked. I tend to have very bad nerves for that sort of thing, whether it's MA or giving a paper at a conference on something in my field, even something I've worked out in minute detail and know top-to-bottom—doesn't matter; the performance situation is enough to replace my clear picture of what's involved with this chaotic strobe-light confusion. It wasn't quite that bad on Saturday—the move did come back to me, just a millisecond too late though.

What it showed me was that I need to add another `bookmark' to the form, in addition to those I already have there. When I'm learning a form, there are, I've found, specific places where confusion is going to arise because the move at that point is very similar to a move that's already been done just a little while before, so that the proximity in time of the two similar (but not identical) moves is a perfect place for confusion to arise—like, where the hell am I in this form?, sort of thing. I have a way of `tagging' such places, so that they get a kind of mental circle drawn around them, and a little warning: this is a double mid level knifehand, not the double down knifehand from three moves earlier, so the following move is the damned front kick, not the lunge punch, etc. Usually I only need one or two of these mental bookmarks; mostly, the form seems to go on rails, when I've worked on it for a bit. I'd thought the point where I blanked was one of the latter, but clearly, I need that mental bookmark (or highlighter?) for it. There's another tournament coming up next April that I'll do the same hyung in, and I'm pretty confident I'll get it completely right next time... we can but try, eh?

 

[MattJ]

Good thread. Fear of failure is normal, but pushing past the fear is essential for continued growth in martial arts and life in general. I have found that fear often comes from not having defined (realistically defined, that is) goals. The HOW? and WHAT IFs? can crush the spirit very easily without enough direction towards the goal.

By taking smaller, methodical steps, there is less fear, since the steps are guiding you. Easier than going feet first into the deep end.

I fumble techniques in my BJJ class every time I free-roll. Only thing to do is accept getting tapped out, and try to figure out how to avoid it next time.

 

[terryl965]

Brian in my book you never fail unless you never try. One must be able to get over the fear of failure and get into the relm of trying. Once that is done the rest is easy.

 

[MA-Caver]

I've been failing at a lot of different things at a lot of different times... only thing I can learn is to keep getting up and trying again, and again, and again. It's like the hippie philosophy: "Look, the world is round right?" ... "yeah" ... "I'll get there!"

 

[Cruentus]

This is a good thread.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up." - Thomas Edison

"If I find 10,000 ways something won't work, I haven't failed. I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward." - Thomas Edison
"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr (Danish physicist and Nobel Prize winner)

I think that failure is often just how you look at it. Not accomplishing a goal sucks, period. But it is only a failure if you don't learn and improve from it.

I'll say that I have "failed" at a whole hell of a lot myself. Really the amount of mistakes and failures I have made are too numerous to mention here; but it extends from job failures to academic failures to relationship failures to mistakes in thinking in the combat arts. But I am actually thankful for all of my mistakes, because they've helped to make me what I am today. I can say that I am a much better person with a diverse, unique, and respectable background because of mistakes that I have been able to learn from.

I think it is important to look at mistakes not as "failures," but as opportunities to learn and grow.

C.

 

[crushing]

Well, funny you should ask about that...

Well, funny you should bring up Palgwe Chil Jang. . .

I have a test coming up and my instructor has been drilling me on my forms. Sunday he had me doing the Palgwes. I was cruising through them feeling really good about it, then Palgwe Chil Jang. I got through the top bar and immediately went into the side kicks and elbow strikes of Palgwe Pal Jang rather than the X-block. I was headed back down the center bar when my instructor pointed out my mistake.

I was embarrassed by my failure on this form. My instructor said I was so smooth and without hesitation in my mistake that he almost didn't realize I was doing something wrong.

I learned that I still have a lot more work to do.

"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently." -Henry Ford

 

[Nomad]

Failure is a much better teacher than success... if you try something and accomplish it easily, you haven't learned much at all. If you try something and fail at it 5 times, then succeed on the 6th, you've learned a great deal in the process.

One of our senior instructors has stated in class that a black belt is composed of 10000 mistakes (a conservative estimate in my experience ) One of the things we have to do is get over the point where we're worried about making mistakes, and just do the technique.

I think this is directly applicable in many different ways outside the dojo as well.

 

[Kosho Gakkusei]

I have a test coming up and my instructor has been drilling me on my forms. Sunday he had me doing the Palgwes. I was cruising through them feeling really good about it, then Palgwe Chil Jang. I got through the top bar and immediately went into the side kicks and elbow strikes of Palgwe Pal Jang rather than the X-block. I was headed back down the center bar when my instructor pointed out my mistake.

I've done that - transition right into a section from a different form. Kind of just happened when I was in a state of Mushin (no mind). I thought it was pretty cool though so I started trying to do it on purpose but then it's not as smooth as when you do it by mistake. I figure if I can get to where I can interchange forms a seamlessly as when I do it by mistake then I'll be better.

_Don Flatt

 

[exile]

Well, funny you should bring up Palgwe Chil Jang. . .

I have a test coming up and my instructor has been drilling me on my forms. Sunday he had me doing the Palgwes. I was cruising through them feeling really good about it, then Palgwe Chil Jang. I got through the top bar and immediately went into the side kicks and elbow strikes of Palgwe Pal Jang rather than the X-block. I was headed back down the center bar when my instructor pointed out my mistake.

Whoa... that's really interesting! Do you have any idea of what it was that made that seem a natural continuation?

I was embarrassed by my failure on this form. My instructor said I was so smooth and without hesitation in my mistake that he almost didn't realize I was doing something wrong.

That suggests that at some level, that fusion of those parts of the two hyungs made sense to you... it would be very illuminating, I think, if one could put one's finger on just why it did. Because I suspect that a lot of form-creation in the old days happened in just that way.

I learned that I still have a lot more work to do.

"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently." -Henry Ford

Don't we all! But it does suggest some kind of creative assimilation of the material you were training and recombining. Unfortunately, we don't get points for that on our belt tests—speaking of which, CR, best of luck on yours!

 

[CoryKS]

I've done that - transition right into a section from a different form. Kind of just happened when I was in a state of Mushin (no mind). I thought it was pretty cool though so I started trying to do it on purpose but then it's not as smooth as when you do it by mistake. I figure if I can get to where I can interchange forms a seamlessly as when I do it by mistake then I'll be better.

_Don Flatt

We have this two-man form called Little Tiger/Little Crane. The Tiger side of it is mostly attacking while the Crane side of it is mostly blocking with a couple of exceptions. There's one point in particular where the Crane throws two downward strikes while Tiger does upward blocks. When I practice on my own, I'm fine. But when practicing with someone else, I do the strikes and immediately transition into Tiger. Every. single. time.

 

[MA-Caver]

"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr (Danish physicist and Nobel Prize winner)

If I made all the mistakes one can make while vertical caving .... I'd be dead... not an expert.

In fact if I made ONE mistake while doing that... I wouldn't live to make all the other ones.

But I DO get the point of the quote... just had to look at it from another perspective. This would apply to (street applied) MA, Law Enforcement and Military Combat.

 

[exile]

This is a good thread.

["An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr (Danish physicist and Nobel Prize winner)

I can say that I am a much better person with a diverse, unique, and respectable background because of mistakes that I have been able to learn from.

I think it is important to look at mistakes not as "failures," but as opportunities to learn and grow.

C.

If I made all the mistakes one can make while vertical caving .... I'd be dead... not an expert.

In fact if I made ONE mistake while doing that... I wouldn't live to make all the other ones.

But I DO get the point of the quote... just had to look at it from another perspective. This would apply to (street applied) MA, Law Enforcement and Military Combat.

I happen to think both of you chaps are right... relative to intended context. Bohr was thinking about cases where, by the nature of the case, you'll live to fight another day, clearly; for the cases MA-C has in mind, I like Churchill's remark:

Play for more than you can afford to lose, and you will learn the game.

 

[aplonis]

I can't say I'd much care for any modern physics gurus laying claim to that attitude. TMI and Chernobyl anyone?

 

[Cruentus]

If I made all the mistakes one can make while vertical caving .... I'd be dead... not an expert.

In fact if I made ONE mistake while doing that... I wouldn't live to make all the other ones.

But I DO get the point of the quote... just had to look at it from another perspective. This would apply to (street applied) MA, Law Enforcement and Military Combat.

Sure. I would have liked to have added "without getting killed" to the quote but that would have been an academic no-no...

 

[TheOriginalName]

Firstly what a fantastic post.....just brilliant!!

And i totally agree. We MUST fail at something. Everyone fails at something. It is how we deal with failure that defines if it is truely a failure. IF we learn from our failures, then is it truely failure??

Personally for me, i suffered a failure just the other night.
It was pre-grading testing. We needed to perform a number of traditional blocks whilst also performing a traditional strance.
To put it bluntly - i totally stuffed it. I think i only managed the combination once....which to me is a failure on my behalf.
However, what have i learnt...that this is an area that i need to focus on, practise and ensure that i do not suffer the same failure again.

Fortunately i still managed to pass my testing....as my instructor know that it was only my combination that was weak, no my technique - but still this WON'T happen again.

I think Winston Churchill put it best

"Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm"

 

[Gordon Nore]

I can't say I'd much care for any modern physics gurus laying claim to that attitude. TMI and Chernobyl anyone?

LOL