Getting spouses "into" Kenpo

[Les]

Years ago, my son used to train in the Kenpo Kids class.

He was always dishartened with his performance, because he felt that as his father was the instructor, he should be automatically good at Kenpo. There was no way I could convince him that his best was good enough.

After my divorce, he continued to train, but he was quite disruptive in class sometimes. His "problem" was that he couldn't seperate 'dad the instructor' from 'dad the dad'. and he resented sharing me with a bunch of other kids, even for an hour.

Now, he's 15, and has no interest in training, as he knows he doesn't have the commitment and wouldn't accept the discipline.

Every now and then I ask him if he want's to come training, but I never pressure him into it.

He does, however, tell all his friends how cool Kenpo is, and is always willing to help with leaflet drops, etc.

Les

 

[Les]

This isn't really spouses, but back in 1996 I had a female student, a single parent, who bought her five kids to Kenpo.

They were unique in that everyone in their household was a Kenpo student, in adult or junior classes.

The local paper did an article on them, and this was picked up by a national magazine.

Six years later, the mother and two of the children are still training with me, and her son, now 21, is about to resume Kenpo, after travelling around the country for work reasons.

You can see their picture on my website, www.americankenpo.co.uk
Go to 'pictures' then click on 'early days'

I know this isn't quite what the thread was about, but I'm proud of them, and they deserve a mention, so please indulge me.

Les

 

[Klondike93]

She has no interest in doing any MA training, but she does let me practice techniques on her every once and a while.

She does do Tae Bo and likes it alot, but that's as far as it goes for her.


That was a real cool thing to do MinnieMin, don't see things like that very often anymore.


:asian:

 

[Les]

Originally posted by Klondike93

That was a real cool thing to do MinnieMin, don't see things like that very often anymore.

MiniMin is a star.

A credit to the Kenpo community.



Les

 

[lifewise]

Originally posted by MinnieMin




Sorry, you can't make it this time ...wait, I have a thought, if it really drives you a NUTS, make a phone call to check if you still can sign in. If you can, I will pay for you first and you can pay me later if you want. I mean that!!!

Min

Incredible kindness.

Think this post/offer by Min is an example of "The Best of Martial Talk" ...

In my opinion you are a credit to Kenpo Min, and will be a great black belt.


:asian:

 

[Klondike93]

Lets be carefull here, she might get a big head over all this attention


:asian:









(still it was a cool thing)

 

[MinnieMin]

Originally posted by Klondike93

Lets be carefull here, she might get a big head over all this attention


:asian:

Acturally, I am flattered and now struggling to find the right words to thank you guys saying such nice things about me. To me, I just offered a little help to others, no bigy.


Min :asian:





(still it was a cool thing)

 

[Klondike93]

After reading some other posts it was nice to see a stranger offer something like that to another stranger. There seems to be a lot of negativity on other posts and yours was very refreshing to see.


:asian:

 

[Michael Billings]

OOS Min,

Wish everyone could see her post! It is a lot better than the sniping going on elsewhere. She
"WALKS THE WALK ... NOT JUST TALKS THE TALK"

Michael Billings
Senior Instructor in the Art
(and proud of my students)

 

[kenpochip]

It would be cool to get my wife into Kenpo, but I'm not holding my breath. Getting kids to do it will be relatively easy.

KenpoChip

 

[Kirk]

Originally posted by kenpochip

It would be cool to get my wife into Kenpo, but I'm not holding my breath. Getting kids to do it will be relatively easy.

KenpoChip

How so? I have 3 1/2 years to "plan my attack" so to speak.

 

[RCastillo]

Originally posted by Kirk



Ditto .. I'd LOVE LOVE LOVE it if my wife joined up, but I don't
force her. What comes around goes around, I might end up in
a knitting class. :rofl: I do worry about her being attacked at
night and what not .. but would forcing her to go help her learn
anything? I doubt it.

Wonderful, A Kenpoist with knitting needles. Dangerous Indeed!

 

[RCastillo]

Originally posted by Kirk

Mr Billings taught me a tech at that seminar, DAMNED good
teacher! Sorry I don't remember seeing you there, but I guess
there will be more chances in the future.

I wont' be able to come to Mr Sepulveda's seminar, and it's
driving me NUTS! The finances just aren't there for it right now
*cry*. Can't wait to hear about it though!

He spent it all on his station wagon, and worse, it still runs!

 

[RCastillo]

Teach your own, whether it be the wife, or children.

 

[tonbo]

Yeah, I agree with that.

The owner/head instructor of our school has two kids who are also involved in the style. He told us YEARS ago that he wouldn't teach his own kids--that was OUR job as instructors. He would teach us, and we would teach his kids in class.

Makes sense. I didn't think my sons wanted to listen to me teaching them at home, either......and I was right........I sounded too much like a dad when teaching them, but sounded like an instructor in the school. Go figure.

Peace--

 

[jeffkyle]

Originally posted by tonbo

Yeah, I agree with that.

The owner/head instructor of our school has two kids who are also involved in the style. He told us YEARS ago that he wouldn't teach his own kids--that was OUR job as instructors. He would teach us, and we would teach his kids in class.

Makes sense. I didn't think my sons wanted to listen to me teaching them at home, either......and I was right........I sounded too much like a dad when teaching them, but sounded like an instructor in the school. Go figure.

Peace--

I totally agree with that. My dad tried to teach me before i got into Kenpo, and that didn't work because it was so informal and he was dad and we just didn't work well together. But he didn't force any martial arts on me ever. When i started in kenpo it was because i wanted to and he knew it would be best for me to go somewhere else to learn.
If and when my kid wants to start learning, i am going to have someone else i know, in kenpo, teaching him.
Actually if Brian and i get a place going then i am going to have him teach my kid, while i teach his. That seems to work out the best from what i have seen.

 

[Michael Billings]

According to Edmund, Jr., he and his dad had the same issues. Hence, his not getting a black belt until after Mr. Parker's passing. We cannot help ourselves growing up. Our parent's opinion of us, or our own issues, with a parent-figure get in the way. Who has not cut off their own nose to spite their face, at least a time or two in our lives? At jobs, school, martial arts, relationships?

I could not teach my ex-wife anything. Fortunately we eventually found a way around it, with one of the senior black belts doing privates with her, so she could come to class and not have the "issues" of a spouse also being in that critical parent role.

Anyhow, keep on keepin' on, and maybe your enthusiasm will become contageous.

-Michael
UKS-Texas

 

[ikenpo]

Originally posted by Michael Billings

According to Edmund, Jr., he and his dad had the same issues. Hence, his not getting a black belt until after Mr. Parker's passing. We cannot help ourselves growing up. Our parent's opinion of us, or our own issues, with a parent-figure get in the way. Who has not cut off their own nose to spite their face, at least a time or two in our lives? At jobs, school, martial arts, relationships?

I could not teach my ex-wife anything. Fortunately we eventually found a way around it, with one of the senior black belts doing privates with her, so she could come to class and not have the "issues" of a spouse also being in that critical parent role.

Anyhow, keep on keepin' on, and maybe your enthusiasm will become contageous.

-Michael
UKS-Texas

Maybe it's another one of those learned skills many Kenpo instructors(parents) just haven't mastered yet. There definitely isn't a training manual out on it that I know of . It seems like Wally Jay, Al Decasco (and his wife), Mike Inay, Remey Presas, Ernie Reyes Sr., Mike Pick, Darrin Phillips, Dan Inosanto and others have learned how to get their chidren in the arts successfully. I assume that most taught their own children, but I could be wrong.

jb:asian:

 

[jeffkyle]

Originally posted by jbkenpo



Maybe it's another one of those learned skills many Kenpo instructors(parents) just haven't mastered yet. There definitely isn't a training manual out on it that I know of . It seems like Wally Jay, Al Decasco (and his wife), Mike Inay, Remey Presas, Ernie Reyes Sr., Mike Pick, Darrin Phillips, Dan Inosanto and others have learned how to get their chidren in the arts successfully. I assume that most taught their own children, but I could be wrong.

jb:asian:

I am sure it can be done, and many have tried, but from what i have seen and learned and experienced, it seems easier to have someone else do it (under close supervision, of course ) because that whole "stranger" concept seems to help keep (kids for sure) them under control.