Yes. Being this attractive, however, can be a burden.
Did I say I was upset THAT men were discussing this matter? No. I did not.
Your entire post is complaining about the fact that it's men engaging in most of the discussion, starting with "I just can't help but sigh" and ending with "Get a grip, fellas ... literally." If you didn't intend to come across as upset then you might have set on the post for a while then gone back and re-read it, re-writing it to change the tone.
For that matter, aren't you assuming gender here? How do you know these posters are all men other than you don't like what they wrote? Not with me, of course. I'm a guy and I admit it.
That most of the discussion had tends to slant towards the assumption that a woman is out-and-about engaging in risky behavior wearing clothing that men think invites them or is meant to attract their attention when the truth is the majority of women who are raped are wearing things like pajamas, mumus, casual clothing doing nothing but going about their daily business.
Most of the discussion in this thread, made by men (we assume) specifically didn't not say that what a person is wearing "invites" the attack, though, yes, how a person presents themselves can draw attention. These are two different things and they shouldn't be conflated, though apparently some people mistakenly do.
All the time. I'm kinda short (despite being this attractive). Sometimes I even have to stand on my tippy-toes to get stuff of the top shelf. I'm a little jealous of those really tall people. But it's good-natured jealousy.
Are you sure you're not upset? It sure sounds like it again.
Ironically, most women have been sexually assaulted yet few men claim to know any man who has assaulted someone.
Two reasons (at least). First, the best statistics we have tend to indicate that the
VAST majority of men aren't actually rapists, meaning that the set of rapist men is much smaller than the general pool of men. Second, it turns out that a lot of people who engage is a crime often don't brag about it. So while some may, apparently many don't, thus, again, reducing the likelihood that any person would knowingly know a rapist.
Some of the discussion in this thread intimates the responsibility of sexual assault on female victims based on what they wear and where they go and what they do - NOT ON THE ACTIONS OF BAD ACTORS.
No. Some discussion in this thread suggests that some people engage in behavior which increases their odds of being targeted by predators. This does not excuse the predator. But if you're going to give advice about personal safety, that should include not putting oneself in higher-risk situations.
To respond to your strawman fallacy, yes - women DO call out other women on bad actions ... theft, robbery, spousal abuse, paternal manipulation, etcetera.
And most men have no problem saying that criminal actions are criminal actions. Nevertheless, the criminal bears the responsibility for their own actions. Wasn't that one of your points?
How do you know most men miss it?
because they infantilize this type of social responsibility taken on mostly by women as bickering or cat-fighting, transform it into something sexually arousing, and reassign its meaning to suit their desires instead of recognizing the usefulness.
I'm not sure where you get your ideas of how "most men" think. At best it's a caricature and wildly inaccurate. At worst, it's a stereotype and lazy thinking.
So it would be GREAT if MEN could say - "hey, just because a woman dresses up and puts makeup on doesn't mean she's trying to attract someone.
That's kinda irrelevant to the discussion and I see lots of people frequently make the mistake. The advice is about managing risk. If a person wants to dress up attractively, that's their right and, in a perfect world, nothing would happen to them that they don't want. But a lot of actions, not just clothing choices, can draw the attention of a predator. The person needs to be aware that they're making choices which could affect their risk profile. If you want to reduce your risk profile as much as possible, do these things. If you're willing to accept a different risk profile, at least understand what it is.
Shut that **** down." It is a GENERAL, SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY - just as many martial artists purport to possess, that of protecting themselves, their loved ones, and someone in genuine need if logically feasible and sensible.
You seem to be assuming that the "men" in this thread, when suggesting risk mitigation strategies, are somehow absolving the criminal of guilt. This is not the case. Learning how to manage and mitigate risk is a part of the picture. Heck it's a long-standing crime-prevention strategy and is present in all manner of programs and strategies such as CPTED (as one example). You don't put CPTED strategies in place because the criminal bears no responsibility for their actions, you put them in place to reduce your risk.
I'll grab some tums and circle back for your recommendation, but the last I checked when visiting elderly relatives, weapons weren't allowed to be possessed by the nursing home residents.
When did nursing homes come into it? That's the first time the "nursing home" restriction has appeared in this thread. You wrote "old women." I know a lot of old women (I'm related to several). Most of them aren't in nursing homes. You're moving the goal-posts.
Virtually EVERY expert on rape completely disagrees with this. When do YOU think it's about sex?
No they don't. That's just what most focus on; the violent attacks. Other rapes, particularly those which feature inability to consent, frequently are about sex much much more than asserting power and authority. To use the stereotype, when a guy gets a chick blackout drunk so that he can have sex with her, it's both sex and is rape (because she cannot consent). Sometime back there was a nutter who was breaking into houses and performing cunnilingus on women. That was all about his personal sexual bent and not about power and control.
The problem is that humans want simple answers so they can have simple solutions. It's weirdly comforting, somehow, for humans to think that all rapes are about violence and power and sex is just the vehicle because it makes it simple.
So yes, some rapes are about power and control and not about sex. But some are.
As usual, the subject is just a lot more complex than the caricature being presented.
