Best way to avoid a fight: shut your mouth

You know I love you really but it's for your own good. (I was going to add something about spanking but remembered in time how old Julian is ) :D;)
Okay, I almost dropped my peanut butter and celery on that one, Tez.
 
I have spent years de-escalating fights with my witty ripostes :)
This works too.
 
I really don't think it is the volume. I believe it is more about what you are saying. Attitude is everything.

I worked in a night shift McDonald's there for a bit. And as people dragged their drunk selves from the clubs. There were tons of fights that were started by stupid comments.

I assume these guys were behaving like that all night but the night club music was just drowning out their idiocy.
 
Even in schools I've noticed it. The shy nerdy kids don't often get in fights because they're quiet and no one bothers with them but the mouthy jocks get in loads of fights.
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Not the way I remember K-12 school. The shy or nerdy or awkward or goofy looking reserved kids got beat up or bullied by the louds jock or mean boastful punks. Maybe that's just my childhod memories ?

I think most predators look for meek prey. Not saying to be loud but don't be not shy with your eyes looking at floor.
 
I've noticed that bullying is often not physical. Now that fighting and contact are completely off limits, the nerdy kids are often the bullies because they don't fear any physical repercussion.
 
I have spent years de-escalating fights with my witty ripostes :)
This works too.

Lol. When I saw your "witty" comment I flashed back to my first year on the street. Responded with another officer to a disturbance call. Get to the corner to see two guys yelling and cursing at each other. I am talking to one of em and he won't stop ranting and raving so I finally said "while your witty repartee has been amusing could you please answer a few simple questions?" He immediately stopped ranting and just looked utterly confused.
 
Lol. When I saw your "witty" comment I flashed back to my first year on the street. Responded with another officer to a disturbance call. Get to the corner to see two guys yelling and cursing at each other. I am talking to one of em and he won't stop ranting and raving so I finally said "while your witty repartee has been amusing could you please answer a few simple questions?" He immediately stopped ranting and just looked utterly confused.


The trick isn't to keep quiet or to be mouthy but to keep calm and say the right thing. One time I had to check the IDs of a bunch of drunk squaddies after an incident and who were just at that point where it could have turned very nasty so to see their IDs I just told them 'come on lads' get them out for me', now of course being squaddies they took this quite the wrong way, as I intended, I got a lot of ribald comments, lots of laughs but they showed their IDs with good grace and I could let them move on. A male colleague wasn't amused, he said he'd have ordered them to show ID and they would have damn well done it, he would have ordered back up and the dogs! Well, no they wouldn't have 'done it', his words and tone of voice would have taken them to the point where they would have turned, mine wasn't the way he would have done it but it did the job without grief. to me that is a result.
It does take confidence and it does take not letting the ego use your mouth but often the way to not get into trouble is to adjust your attitude.
 
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