Attacked in my front yard

[matt.m]

Matt,

Glad to hear that your OK, and nice job doing the right thing and defending yourself, but not overstepping the lines of SD.

That said, the thing that sucks the worst about this is that he is your neighbor. The worst thing to have is a feud with a neighbor. Reason is, this might not be over. This could go on and on and on. He could attack you again, wait for when you are not home and do something to you family, pets, property. It could be a constant struggle.

I am sorry to say this, and I am not trying to make you paranoid. But this does happen. And now he will have a reason to perpetuate a conflict, because you kicked his *** (never mind the fact that he is the ******* that attacked you first, because these *******s never see that).

I would consider trying to talk to him, or make some sort of amends (even though you weren't wrong, but that doesn't matter). Kind of test the waters to see if you guys can coexist. This isn't necessarily the right answer, just something to consider and think about. Only you can really know the right answer here because you are closer to the situation then anyone on this forum.

Good luck, man.

Believe it or not I thought of this same approach, once he is done with the police. I did press charges. He is not afraid to hit women, that is my biggest concern. I mean if I get hurt then that sucks, if my wife or dog get hurt.....that would be unbearable.

To bad you can't interview your prospective neighbors before putting an offer on the house.

 

[matt.m]

Yeah, see, this is exactly what I'm wondering also. This guy should be on parole at this point, looking at five to ten if he puts a single toe out of line. But his past doesn't seem to have clipped his wings at all. Why not? Involved in a physical conflict with an LEO? Come on!!

Something seems seriously wrong here....

For some reason the folks in his family or those he wronged in the neighborhood were afraid to press charges on crazy man. Honestly, I think in his mind he has to be the rooster of the barnyard and everyone will respect him. Whether genuine or through fear. I feel sorry for people like this, they have very unfulfilled lives.

 

[Cruentus]

Fear and angry aggression come from the same part of the brain; amygdala. People who are overtly angry aggressive who use intimidation to get their way against innocent people are often very fearful people as well at their core. So, fear can often be a motivator for them.

I am not implying that you should do anything illegal or crazy, but I am just stating this for you to keep in mind and use to your advantage if needed.

 

[Bill Lear]

Press charges, temporary restraining order and take some extra precautions for the future.

Thank goodness you are okay!

I second that notion. This guy obviously doesn't really care that much about himself, and his lovely disposition might actually land him in a correctional facility with others that share his nasty habits. Just make sure you're safe and not the statistic that buys him his trip to life on the inside.

 

[Bill Lear]

Fear and angry aggression come from the same part of the brain; amygdala. People who are overtly angry aggressive who use intimidation to get their way against innocent people are often very fearful people as well at their core. So, fear can often be a motivator for them.

I am not implying that you should do anything illegal or crazy, but I am just stating this for you to keep in mind and use to your advantage if needed.

I agree. Don't forget that people who are affraid usually bring weapons to tip the scales in their favor.

 

[Tames D]

Believe it or not I thought of this same approach, once he is done with the police. I did press charges. He is not afraid to hit women, that is my biggest concern. I mean if I get hurt then that sucks, if my wife or dog get hurt.....that would be unbearable.

To bad you can't interview your prospective neighbors before putting an offer on the house.

I think it stinks that you have to live next door to a guy like this. Talk about bringing down the harmony in the neighborhood. I will NEVER complain about my neighbor again. He drinks too much and whenever I go out front he runs over and wants to talk my head off, but a very nice and social guy. So I feel your pain having to live next to your neighbor. I'll never complain again about mine, LOL.

 

[jdinca]

Well done. Let's hope he's learned his lesson. I feel sorry for his family.

 

[Xue Sheng]

I know I am late but I just noticed this post.

Matt I am glad to hear you are alright and you were not wrong in your response and it sounds like you have handled everything just fine.

 

[MJS]

Slightly off subject here, but I can't let this thought go. This jerk has got to much history. A retired cop neighbor "beat him down"? I can understand him not wanting to go back after a cop,..... assualt charges / domestic battery(s),..........Drunk charges,..............and whatever else is on his sheet............My question is - What is this idiot doing out? You just have to scratch your head and wonder just what the hell happened to the judicial system. :idunno:

I often wonder the same thing. I've seen the rap sheets of some guys, with 30 arrests. The charges are either dropped or they're given a suspended sentence. Some of these charges include drug violations, assault, robbery. Go figure.

Mike

 

[Andy Moynihan]

Won't let me rep you just now, but had to send my support your way none the less.

The USMC standard hanging by the garage shouldve been this loser's clue.

Good job but stay alert.

 

[CoryKS]

The USMC standard hanging by the garage shouldve been this loser's clue.

Well, they don't call Missouri the Show Me State for nothing! So Matt showed him. :rofl:

 

[donna]

Glad to hear that you and your wife are OK. Hope he gets what he deserves.

 

[Ninjamom]

Matt, I am Sooooooo glad that you are OK and that the situation ended as it did. You did exactly the right thing, and all your MT buds are proud of ya.

That said, I have one more thing to add: this may sound really stupid, but THANK GOD that YOU were the neighbor he tried something with! Things could easily have ended differently if he had tried this with ANYONE else in the area. If it had been my drunk neighbor messing with me, as small as I am, that could have easily been me lying on the pavement instead of him.

I try to teach my sons that the number one thing that really makes them a man is how they use their strength to protect and defend the women in their lives. If this guy beats on his wife and kids, then let's just say he is already less of a man, in my book. You used the training you had, your strength, and your instincts to stand up to someone who isn't afraid to hit people smaller and weaker than himself. If the only result of all this is that he thinks twice before hitting someone else, then, my friend, you have succeeded in defending a lot more than your own yard!

 

[searcher]

Well, they don't call Missouri the Show Me State for nothing! So Matt showed him. :rofl:

You have got to stop. I can't stop laughing long enough to hardly type.

 

[exile]

Won't let me rep you just now, but had to send my support your way none the less.

I'm in the same boat. But Matt has rep coming from me on this as soon as he's cycled off my current rep list.

The USMC standard hanging by the garage shouldve been this loser's clue.

Good job but stay alert.

My thoughts exactly... except that losers like the guy Matt decked are clueless, so clues are useless to them. My hope is, he'll do some hard time and maybe fall foul of some really scary guy inside, and then neither Matt nor anyone else will have to waste another moment of precious lifetime thinking about him. But yes, in cases like this, keep your powder dry.

The problem with imbiciles like this guy is that they do not learn from experience.....

 

[dragonswordkata]

I"m glad you are ok. Please do watch your back.

You know what sucks about this. His wife and probably kids will pay for this when he gets out of jail. Friggin bullies. I know the inner child speech about how he probably had an abusive childhood and it's just repeating itself. I do have some sympathy for his pain, but he's supposed to be an adult! Maybe he forgot; Marriage = love, honor, cherish.
Well, I know counciling to him would probably be futile but I do hope and pray that his wife sees that she CAN leave and she WILL do better on her own, before he gets worse.

 

[KenpoGunz]

Thank you for sharing your experience, and thank you for your service to our country.

I hope everything works out well for you and your family.

 

[exile]

I"m glad you are ok. Please do watch your back.

You know what sucks about this. His wife and probably kids will pay for this when he gets out of jail. Friggin bullies. I know the inner child speech about how he probably had an abusive childhood and it's just repeating itself. I do have some sympathy for his pain, but he's supposed to be an adult! Maybe he forgot; Marriage = love, honor, cherish.
Well, I know counciling to him would probably be futile but I do hope and pray that his wife sees that she CAN leave and she WILL do better on her own, before he gets worse.

There's a lot of sense in this. The guy is a nasty creep because he was badly damaged, somewhere along the line, almost certainly. That might be an explanation. But it can't be an excuse. There are a lot of people who have been badly damaged in their lives who are perfectly fine, functional, valuable human beings. This guy chooses not to be.

On the one hand, people who grow up in cruel, brutal circumstances are very likely to be cruel and brutal themselves. But on the other hand, the guy isn't an automaton, mindlessly acting out some script that's been programmed into him as though he were a robot. He can act, and he can also refrain from acting. If Matt were seven feet tall, weighted three hundred and fifty pounds of pure muscle, and had twin 10-guage sawed-offs in holsters strapped to his hip, it's very unlikely the guy would have attempted to assault him. So he knows that there are circumstances in which violence is an attractive choice for him, and circumstances where it isn't. Once he knows that, he's completely responsible for everything he does, because when he acts violently, it means he's decided that that situation is one in which it's an attractive choice. He can choose. That makes him responsible...

 

[bluemtn]

What an excellent way to demonstrate what a true warrior is, Matt. I'm glad that you weren't injured, and he's in jail right now. Great advice you gave your wife, too. I'm just sorry to hear that it happened, though. Did you get the restraining order?

Well, I know counciling to him would probably be futile but I do hope and pray that his wife sees that she CAN leave and she WILL do better on her own, before he gets worse.

I hope so too.

 

[Miles]

Matt, happy to hear that you (and your neighbor) are okay. You handled yourself well. As others have noted, you and your wife should keep your radar up when he eventually gets released.

Miles