Another NON Father forced to Pay

[AceHBK]

Google child support horror stories and read some wodnerful stories.

NYS says that 17% is what you pay for 1 child based on your potential earning ability.
Yeah, potential. Not actual. They do not care if you have money for rent, heat, electric or even food and medicine. Just pay them what they decided you should, otherwise they will steal (sorry, garnish) bank accounts, steal (I mean sieze) assets, and do their best to destroy you mentally, emotionally and physically. Accuracy in record keeping is a joke.

That right there is sooooooo true. They don't even take into account what kind of bills you have or what not...just take money off the top and then if you have to change your lifestyle then so be it.

Then to add insut to injury most women willsay "you don't pay enough" and want the fathers to come off more money. The whole system is a joke and it favors women to the extreme. Men are seen as people who are good enough to pay child support but not good enough to raise a child.

I am going thru my own custody battle right now and I have gotten hosed on things where the judge later comes back and says "im sorry i made a mistake". The best interest of the child is so subjective it isn't even close to being funny. The system enables women to do this and there is nothing to prevent it.

The only way some sort of change will happen is if judges are held accountable for their decisions. I have seen some men come off $700/month in child support for 1 child and I will tell you in no way in this world does it take $700month to raise a child, not to mention they don't even consider how much the mother makes in some states.

 

[AceHBK]

This is anecdotal and does not represent the spirit of the general population. You cannot assume all women do this with malice as an intent. The State feels she did it for her child... so its OK.
Sean

I can't agree with you on this. The state is assuming what the mother did was right and we all know the state isn't the best at doing that. The system is as faulty as the people who wrote the laws down to the people who enforce them.

 

[Bob Hubbard]

Nah. Just your freedom.

 

[AceHBK]

When stuff like this happens or women asking for obscene amounts of money in divorces...it make a lifetime of having prostitutes, call girls, porn more economical feasible and a lot less stressful.

 

[CoryKS]

When stuff like this happens or women asking for obscene amounts of money in divorces...it make a lifetime of having prostitutes, call girls, porn more economical feasible and a lot less stressful.

One of my more bitter divorced friends likes to tell this joke: "Do you know why divorce is expensive?" "Because it's worth it."

Except the way he tells it, it doesn't sound like a joke.

 

[AceHBK]

One of my more bitter divorced friends likes to tell this joke: "Do you know why divorce is expensive?" "Because it's worth it."

Except the way he tells it, it doesn't sound like a joke.

lol...you know I hate to admit it but I do not see myself getting married. I see it as a toal waste of time and money. Marriage is an investment and right now it is a high risk with divorce being 50% if not higher.

If I ever did get married, I would spend more money on the prenup than the actual ceremony and other expenses.

 

[Sukerkin]

It's an interesting side-bar subject to query why the divorce rate is so high and from which partner the initiative comes.

There are no guarantees that marriages are always going to run smoothly but it seems from what I see and hear that people are going into marriages as if they are some form of 'entertainment' and as soon as they stop being entertaining then it's off to the divorce court. My folks have often termed it "Being in love with being in love" when that initial chemical glow fades and the erstwhle bride and groom go looking for someone else to get that feeling once again.

It is from my parents that I have learned a great lesson about relationships and how to make them work. It's very simple really. The core element for making a relationship last is for both parties to take an interest in the happiness of the other.

Fail in that and we're back to child support and alimony (thinly disguised, gender biased, legally approved robbery as it is).

 

[Big Don]

The women that do this ought to be tried for fraud. Fraud is defined by Law.com's legal dictionary as:

n. the intentional use of deceit, a trick or some dishonest means to deprive another of his/her/its money, property or a legal right.

Lying about the father of a child would certainly qualify.

 

[Touch Of Death]

The women that do this ought to be tried for fraud. Fraud is defined by Law.com's legal dictionary as: Lying about the father of a child would certainly qualify.

Not at the present time.
Sean

 

[Bob Hubbard]

The best part of the system is how you're required to pay, have no say over how th money is spent, have no right to even ask for an accounting, and your own ability to self-sustain is not important. The system is broken, and needs to be reformed so that it is fair to all participants.

 

[crushing]

The best part of the system is how you're required to pay, have no say over how th money is spent, have no right to even ask for an accounting, and your own ability to self-sustain is not important. The system is broken, and needs to be reformed so that it is fair to all participants.

The lack of paternal rights but requirement of responsibility if the mother so chooses starts well before that, but that turns the discussion to abortion.

No legal say, but the legal requirement to pay. Often rights and responsibility are married, but as I said previously, this is an area where they have been divorced.

 

[AceHBK]

The best part of the system is how you're required to pay, have no say over how th money is spent, have no right to even ask for an accounting, and your own ability to self-sustain is not important. The system is broken, and needs to be reformed so that it is fair to all participants.

This right here is nothing but the truth.
This is my biggest issue/concern with this whole thing.
As the non custodial parent you have NO IDEA of how that money is spent. Women are good for saying how expensive it is to raise a child (which I do agree) but men can do the samething and it not cost the same amount of money per month.

This system needs reform as bad as the welfare system (which i feel should be done away with.....but that is for another thread) and sad thing is that I don't forsee that happening anytime while I'm alive.

 

[Big Don]

This right here is nothing but the truth.
This is my biggest issue/concern with this whole thing.
As the non custodial parent you have NO IDEA of how that money is spent. Women are good for saying how expensive it is to raise a child (which I do agree) but men can do the samething and it not cost the same amount of money per month.

This system needs reform as bad as the welfare system (which i feel should be done away with.....but that is for another thread) and sad thing is that I don't forsee that happening anytime while I'm alive.

Reminds me of Chris Rock's bit about OJ."$4000 for food? FOUR THOUSAND DOLLARS for food! She must have had some extra cheese on her whopper.

 

[theletch1]

Right up until my ex handed my son over to me I paid every month on time...even before the court order. Constant bitching about money from her. She "needed" more. Thing is my son was always in ratty clothes, never got a new toy and so on. When she handed him over and I stopped paying her cell phone and internet suddenly got cut off. Gee, wonder where the money was going. I haven't recieved the first penny. Didn't ask for any. Just knowing that my son is with me and safe and happy is enough. As for an accounting of the money, hang it up. We can't invade the privacy of the parent.:shrug: The system is truly hosed.

 

[AceHBK]

Right up until my ex handed my son over to me I paid every month on time...even before the court order. Constant bitching about money from her. She "needed" more. Thing is my son was always in ratty clothes, never got a new toy and so on. When she handed him over and I stopped paying her cell phone and internet suddenly got cut off. Gee, wonder where the money was going. I haven't recieved the first penny. Didn't ask for any. Just knowing that my son is with me and safe and happy is enough. As for an accounting of the money, hang it up. We can't invade the privacy of the parent.:shrug: The system is truly hosed.

:highfive: Glad you was able to get your son. I know it must of been like going thru hell in the courts. I wonder how many men have their kids and actually get child support. I wouldn't doubt most men saying "I don't even want it...I can take care of it without her help." And yeah for some reason they always need more but when you see your kid your kid looks like he isn't receiving anything. Some women get $600 a month but want to call you every month and say, "your son/daughter needs more clothes, shoes, etc...things are expensive".



:lfao: @ Big don.