World Peace

[mj-hi-yah]

Subject: World Peace



A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a bottle. She picked it up and rubbed it, and 'low-and-behold' a genie appeared! The amazed woman asked if she got three wishes. The genie said, "Nope, sorry, three-wish genies are a storybook myth. I'm a one-wish genie.

So...what'll it be?" The woman did not hesitate. She said, "I want
peace in the Middle East. See this map? I want these countries to
stop fighting with each other and I want all the Arabs to love the Jews
and Americans and vice-versa. It will bring about world peace and
harmony."

The genie looked at the map and exclaimed, "Lady, be reasonable.
These countries have been at war for thousands of years. I'm out of shape
after being in a bottle for five hundred years. I'm good but not THAT
good! I don't think it can be done. Make another wish and please be
reasonable."

The woman thought for a minute and said, "Well, I've never been able
to find the right man. You know, one that's considerate and fun, likes
to cook and help with the house cleaning, is great in bed, and gets
along with my family, doesn't watch sports all the time, and is faithful.
That's what I wish for ... a good man."

The genie let out a sigh and said, "Let me see the ******* map
again."

 

[shesulsa]

Yeah - where's the map??? HE HE HE!!! Points for MJ!

 

[Adept]

On a similar note:

A man discovers a bottle, and upon rubbing it releases a genie. 'Awesome' he says, expecting three wishes. The genie then informs him he has only one wish. I dunno, cut rate genie or something.

Anyway, our guy is a really keen surfer, but he lives in Washington DC. So he asks the genie; 'I'd really like a super-highway from Washington to Hawaii'. The Genie nearly has a fit! 'Are you insane?! Just think of the logistics involved! The size of the pylons, the sheer volume of concrete required? The amount of questions people will ask? If word gets out about me I wont get a moments rest! Isn't there something else you could wish for?'

Our surfer has always been a sensitive kind of guy, but he shares a problem with all other men in the world. He thinks for a moment, and the asks 'Okay genie. I want to understand women. I want to know why they cry for no reason, why they go to the toilet in groups, why they can never put the seat down, I want to know what answer I should give when they ask me if they look fat in that dress, I want to get inside their heads. I want to really understand them'.

The genie is silent for a good long moment.

'So, do you want two lanes or four?'

 

[shesulsa]

Then there's the one where the man's wish is for his wanker to hang so low it touches the ground, so the genie shortens his legs.

 

[Adept]

Then there's the one where the man's wish is for his wanker to hang so low it touches the ground, so the genie shortens his legs.

lol, then there is the one who gets a genie with a hearing problem and ends up with a 12" pianist.

 

[shesulsa]

lol, then there is the one who gets a genie with a hearing problem and ends up with a 12" pianist.

:rofl::roflmao::rofl:

 

[Baytor]

Those are all oldies but goodies.:boing1: