What is the Greatest Lesson You Have Learned from the Martial Arts?

[Curlykarateka]

Strength is not doing it first time. It's about getting up and trying again, and going a little further than the last time.

 

[Aiki Lee]

The only thing that prevents me from obtaining my goals, is me.

 

[Kung Fu Wang]

The only thing that prevents me from obtaining my goals, is me.

When you train in

- slow speed, everything is perfect, that's the "fake you".
- combat speed, nothing is perfect, that's the "real you".

You want a "non-perfect you" that work. You don't want a "perfect you" that doesn't work.

 

[Kong Soo Do]

I've got a project going where I am trying to collect a huge cross section of lessons learned by different aspects of the martial arts. There are so many take-aways from different schools, instructors, philosophies, hard-way lessons, different situations, etc. The martial arts is a benefit to so many lives in so many different ways. I'm working to paint the arts in a unique way and capture all of the not-initially-apparent lessons that people can glean from essentially learning how to fight.

So far I've gotten answers from lots of well known martial artists from around the world as well as amateurs. I've already published a nice full-color book of all these lessons, but I'm working on compiling enough for a second edition. I figured this would be a good discussion topic for this forum, but if you want a chance to be published in the book, let me know and I will tell you how to submit your passage of up to 1000 words.

A contribution from Diana Lee Inosanto published in the first edition of Greatest Lessons from the Martial Arts:
"Be calm. Keep a calm state of mind and guard yourself against depression, agitation and stress, because most of the things we combat in life are psychological, not physical."

I also have much longer contributions from Dr Yang Jwing-Ming, Grandmaster Wong Kiew Kit and many others.

So, what is the greatest lesson you have learned from training?

Minimum force may not be the same as minimal force.

 

[jacefox]

Breathe and be patient with oneself.

 

[Xue Sheng]

crushing my enemies, seeing them driven before me, and listening to the lamentation of their women is a wonderful thing.

That and don't fight because fighing is a very serious thing.

 

[grumpywolfman]

Learning to walk away from insults is one of the greatest skills a martial artist can have; because if you lose self control, you'll risk losing everything - you can't solve your problems with your fists.

 

[kodora81]

Although setting goals for yourself are productive and necessary (especially in martial arts), it's important to be present and content with where you are currently at.

In other words, mindfulness mindfulness mindfulness.

 

[EddieCyrax]

Humility. There is always something new to learn, things to improve, and room to grow within your art. Avoid comparing one-self to others as they are on their own path and timeline.

 

[Cyriacus]

You can do pretty much anything, if you can figure out how, and you aren't opposed to the how.

That can be applied to alot of things.

 

[malteaser14]

To control my aggression! Not quite mastered it yet, but I am a calmer, nicer person thanks to MA! I still slip up now and then, but I figure out why and ways to prevent it in the future.

I also have learnt to trust and respect people. And to also conquer my fears.
Basically had a relationship with a MA's 10yrs ago, it wasn't good and ended badly. Since then I have made lots of bad choices, didnt trust any man, especially not MA's!! I started MA so I could look after myself and kids... But walking into a dojo day after day was probably the hardest thing I have ever done! But it was also the best thing I could do! I now have my life back... And I feel totally safe in the dojo and amongst fellow MA's

 

[Tony Dismukes]

Okay, this may be a long one.
I've learned a lot of important lessons from the martial arts over the years, but the biggest lesson came about 26 years ago, while I was training in Bujinkan taijutsu (or Togakure Ryu ninjutsu, as it was marketed in those days).

To set the stage, you have to understand that Stephen Hayes and some of his black belts who were running the Dayton dojo at the time tended to use the physical aspects of the art as metaphors for philosophical life lessons and I enthusiastically embraced this approach, regularly trying to find the relevant personal lesson in whatever I was practicing.

The start of the lesson came when a friend from the dojo and I were showing off techniques for a woman we were both interested in and going a bit rough. How rough, I found out a few days later when my friend informed me that I had broken his hand, necessitating doctor's bills that he could ill afford.

Naturally, I felt terrible about this. It got worse, though. I was talking to another friend about the incident and she told me "Well, you can't be surprised. You know you have a problem with your control. After all, you injured soandso a couple of months ago and they had to take time off from training." This was news to me. Soandso had never told me they were injured, either at the time or afterwards, and neither had anyone else. Now I really felt like a jerk. Not only had I injured someone that I liked, but I hadn't even known about it to apologize.

So after I sought out soandso to deliver my belated apology, I tried to find a useful life lesson from the experience. Perhaps, I theorized, the physical could be a metaphor for the social. Just as my lack of physical awareness allowed me to hurt my training partners without realizing it, perhaps I could also be inadvertantly hurting feelings or offending people in social interactions without realizing it.

I doubted this was actually the case, but I ran the theory past some of my friends. It actually felt like I was fishing for compliments. Surely they would say "Oh no, Tony. Everybody knows you're a nice guy." The actual reaction I got - awkward silences.

As it turned out, people were too polite to say it to my face, but I was just as oblivious socially as I was physically. I really was just as likely to offend someone with a clueless comment as I was to apply a wristlock too quickly on my training partner.

This started me on parallel quests to learn awareness and control in conversation and in the dojo. This was a long and emotionally painful process that took several years before I got to the point where I was consistently happy with myself on either front. As it turned out, the physical really was a good metaphor for the non-physical in this case. In both situations, my problem was lack of awareness. In the dojo, the problem wasn't that I was necessarily going too hard in general. It was that I couldn't tell how hard to go with a given individual on a given technique on a given day. In conversation, it wasn't that I was saying mean things. It was that I was unaware of the signals people were sending me.

I've gotten a lot of other important benefits from the martial arts since, but starting me on the path to being socially competent has probably made the most difference in my life.

 

[Miles]

Patience with myself and others.

 

[Gnarlie]

If you put liquid heat rub between your shoulder blades, then it runs down the middle of your back, you're pretty much going to have a bad day.

Gnarlie

 

[martial sparrer]

Ma is about training evil out of your spirit....then yu are to destroy evil in the world

 

[Cyriacus]

then yu are to destroy evil in the world

Sometimes i remember why i love and adore forums.

 

[martial sparrer]

what is your greatest lesson learned??....please man.....destroying evil in the world can be as simple as being kind to people....check your attitude.....useless

Sometimes i remember why i love and adore forums.

 

[Cyriacus]

what is your greatest lesson learned??....please man.....destroying evil in the world can be as simple as being kind to people....check your attitude.....useless

My greatest lesson learnt is on the previous page.
But if you want to destroy evil in the world, first you need the selfrighteousness to define yourself as good, and right no matter what differences and contradictions exist in other species, other cultures, and human history. Being a good person is different to destroying evil. Destroying evil is paramount to genocide, which in and of itself is evil.

Anything else?

 

[pgsmith]

Ma is about training evil out of your spirit....then yu are to destroy evil in the world

My Ma tried to beat the evil out of me on occasion, but never tried training it out. Or were you talking about your own Ma? What does anyone's Ma have to do with martial arts anyway?

Guess I'm confused. Must be the evil in my spirit!

 

[bookworm_cn317]

To never give up.