Tactifool

[stonewall1350]

We have a Landrover, standard for where we live, in the countryside we need it plus they last for decades. I've seen fifty year old plus ones still running around here.

I'm partial to old Tacomas and broncos. My mom drives a land rover though. she loves it.


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[Steve]

My wife just got a spam email for a 'tactical pen', which is (from what I can tell), a common ink pen with a black rubber gripping surface.

It claims to be the world's leading choice for military and police the world over.

Huh.

When I was a Marine MP, I carried a pen. A 'Bic'. Very tactical. Oooh, scary stuff, kids.

And I find myself surrounded these days by guys in their twenties and thirties who have never served a day in the military, but they dress the part. Kind of. They try to cultivate the 'operator' look.

It starts with tattoos. Generally an entire sleeve or both arms, and perhaps an edgy "I don't really care if I can't find a job later" neck or face tattoo.

Then we've got the epic beard. I'll give them credit for this, it's usually better than I can grow. I don't know how they do it - I've seen kids in high schools with better beards that I can grow now. Heck, in Marine Corps boot camp, I hardly had to shave - I was mostly cutting peach fuzz and zits.

Then the plaid shirt, or some kind of pseudo military shirt. The 'Tapout' shirts seem to have gone away, but I still see them once in awhile; usually stretched over a belly that is bigger than mine.

Baseball caps for sure - usually designating some military service or another, or a famous police department.

Jeans have to be greasy for some reason - I guess to show they work on cars?

Doc Martens or boondockers round out the outfit.

They love them some jacked up four-wheel-drive vehicles, although from the looks of all that chrome and stuff hanging off them, they've never seen a non-paved trail, let alone really gone 'wheeling'.

Then we have the weapons. Oh dear me, they do love them some black guns. AR15, AK47, and of course all the FN-FAL and CETME and other fine semi-automatic versions of military weapons they can find.

And the accessories! Wow, they sure have a lot of accessories! Besides the weapon itself, they have aftermarket lasers, and usually iron sights AND one or even two optical sights as well. Sometimes they have night-vision stuff. Flash suppressors, hand guards, pistol grips, collapsible buttstocks, shortened barrels, trigger guards designed to allow extreme winter use with polar gloves on. I'm surprised they don't have a thing in the stock which tells time.

They were all operators. Let me tell you, they are all special forces. They have more jump time than I have time in. They have more wings than an angel. More cloth on their combat ribbons than a Turkish bath towel.

Well.

Just had to get this off my chest. My non-hairy, non-tattooed, non-tactical chest.

Add the dangling scrotum from the back of the pickup truck and this sounds pretty much like the run of the mill, South King County, Libertarian. Or as we call them around here, pretty much everyone. Living south of Seattle, there are many beards, many pickup trucks, a lot of tattoos and plenty of firearms.

I don't know whether they go in for the boutique, tactical equipment, but I suspect not. Although in the Fred Meyer the other day I did see a camouflage recliner. Not sure what one does with that, but it looked pretty strange to me.

 

[Carol]

Wow. I went to that website, how in the hell did you fall into their mailing list, you poor bastard?

If I understand this properly, they send you a monthly shipment of "tactical gear" that they select for you. I guess they decide what it is that you need? From the website, "curated tactical oriented items delivered to your door monthly".

Yes, "curated".

Better be careful, you might end up with a repeating monthly shipment of tactical pens, if that is all they have on hand at shipment time.

This is the kind of thing that to me, just screams "PARANOID!!!!!"

There's a service called "Cairn" that offers something similar for hiking gear. A few of my friends have subscribed, and love it. To me it just screams "Pay us to send you stuff that hasn't sold elsewhere!"

 

[JR 137]

Add the dangling scrotum from the back of the pickup truck and this sounds pretty much like the run of the mill, South King County, Libertarian. Or as we call them around here, pretty much everyone. Living south of Seattle, there are many beards, many pickup trucks, a lot of tattoos and plenty of firearms.

I don't know whether they go in for the boutique, tactical equipment, but I suspect not. Although in the Fred Meyer the other day I did see a camouflage recliner. Not sure what one does with that, but it looked pretty strange to me.

I also saw camo recliners. They had a duck dynasty logo on them. Along with a camo armoire placed further behind it.

Just, why?

 

[Steve]

I also saw camo recliners. They had a duck dynasty logo on them. Along with a camo armoire placed further behind it.

Just, why?

if you lose your camouflage wallet in the couch you'll never find it

 

[JR 137]

if you lose your camouflage wallet in the couch you'll never find it

I was thinking if you throw your camo jacket on the recliner, you'll never see it.

 

[Tames D]

There's a service called "Cairn" that offers something similar for hiking gear. A few of my friends have subscribed, and love it. To me it just screams "Pay us to send you stuff that hasn't sold elsewhere!"

Good to see you back Carol. I missed you!

 

[punisher73]

You forgot that they all are on the Paleo diet and do crossfit!

Seriously, I remember seeing an ad for a seminar. The topic was "Tactical Pull ups". I looked at it out of morbid curiousity to see if it was pulling yourself up and over obstacles, how to scale things. Nope, just how to do pull ups as exercise!

It makes me want to scream on how much crap is labeled "tactical". The tac pens really piss me off. They almost all look like they are a stabbing weapon that can write. Heaven forbid you actually use one to defend yourself. A good attorney is going to tear you up about how you wanted to stab someone. Just buy a freakin' cross pen for half the cost and it just looks like a nice pen.