road rage

[painstain]

i was headed to my parents house with all my children in the van with me.
two guys in another car was bullying everyone around them with their vehicle. they drive next to me and i just looked at em. just for looking at them i became a target. they got behind me riding so close i couldn't see anything but their windshield in my rear view mirror. i sped up they sped up then i slowed to almost a stop. they pulled up next to me and flicked a cigarette into my window then they got in front of me and stopped. i tried to go around but they kept blocking me. i got out of my van and rushed the driver while he was getting out. i couldn't collect myself i was so freakin scared and angry. all i could think is that my kids are ganna see me get my head kicked in. like i said i rushed the driver while he was getting out. i slammed his door back and fourth with him inbetween the door and the driver seat. the passenger had gotten out and had his arm around my throat trying to pull me to the ground. i'm a small guy (5.8 150) i was able to get out of his grip and ended up behind and i laid the hardest center punch into that guys spine that i had ever delivered. the driver was in obvious pain holding onto his shins and bleeding from his chest from catching the corner of the door. now while this was going on and i'm sure it wasn't a long time i looked over to my van and an off duty police officer had stopped and was just looking in on my kids. he also called the police thankfully. he told me he thought i was an officer or atleast a military person by the way i handled it. all the time people were gathering and NOT helping. the off duty police officer allowed me to just leave and thats just what i did. the point?? there isn't one. i was scared for my kids and didn't know what else to do. the guys would not let me drive away. when i punched the passenger in the back as hard as i possible could he dropped and didn't even try to get back up. he knew him and his partner were about to go to jail. has anyone else here had a scary road rage incident.

 

[Dark]

Not as bad as yours and oh by the way, don't beat yourself up for acting the way you did it's called parental instinct

In this age of dead-beat parents you have my compliments...

 

[Jenna]

i was headed to my parents house with all my children in the van with me.
two guys in another car was bullying everyone around them with their vehicle. they drive next to me and i just looked at em. just for looking at them i became a target. they got behind me riding so close i couldn't see anything but their windshield in my rear view mirror. i sped up they sped up then i slowed to almost a stop. they pulled up next to me and flicked a cigarette into my window then they got in front of me and stopped. i tried to go around but they kept blocking me. i got out of my van and rushed the driver while he was getting out. i couldn't collect myself i was so freakin scared and angry. all i could think is that my kids are ganna see me get my head kicked in. like i said i rushed the driver while he was getting out. i slammed his door back and fourth with him inbetween the door and the driver seat. the passenger had gotten out and had his arm around my throat trying to pull me to the ground. i'm a small guy (5.8 150) i was able to get out of his grip and ended up behind and i laid the hardest center punch into that guys spine that i had ever delivered. the driver was in obvious pain holding onto his shins and bleeding from his chest from catching the corner of the door. now while this was going on and i'm sure it wasn't a long time i looked over to my van and an off duty police officer had stopped and was just looking in on my kids. he also called the police thankfully. he told me he thought i was an officer or atleast a military person by the way i handled it. all the time people were gathering and NOT helping. the off duty police officer allowed me to just leave and thats just what i did. the point?? there isn't one. i was scared for my kids and didn't know what else to do. the guys would not let me drive away. when i punched the passenger in the back as hard as i possible could he dropped and didn't even try to get back up. he knew him and his partner were about to go to jail. has anyone else here had a scary road rage incident.

This is terrifying my friend.. and I am SO glad you are alright and especially with your children and I am very grateful that none of you were hurt.. man I just cannot believe some people in their damn vehicles.. I would only say to NEVER engage a road rager having been caught out many many times previously.. I know it is not the "manly" thing for either gals or guys to do .. especially martial artists! but for me.. nowadays I always give way and pull right to the side or just whatever because there are folk who once they press their ignition become suddenly sociopathic at best and more inclined towards the psychopathic at worst..

I have NEVER once gotten out of my vehicle at a road rager no matter whether or not I felt I could take them. NEVER. and that my friend would be my advice to you or anyone regardless of their martial arts proficiency.. Stay in your car.. make certain your doors are locked AT ALL TIMES when you are driving.. never make eye contact with a road rager and if you do accidentally make certain you either smile nod or wave absolutely honestly and sincerely as generally these monkeys are not setting out to be personally aggressive but they are determined to blaze a path through which no one is entitled to be in front of them...

Personally because of the car I drove and have had to sell recently and gone back to a smaller car.. I have been on the receiving end of a LOT of road rage but I am happy to turn right off the road and off my course just to avoid someone who wants to try their luck with me..

So again I will say I am grateful that you and your precious cargo are all safe and that is the main thing and everything else takes the lower priority but I will give my tips for future which are nothing special or clever but just what I have learned myself from awful experience... drivers here in London particularly terrify me sometimes..

> never make eye contact with a road rager
> if you accidentally make eye contact try a sincere smile a polite wave or a respectful nod
> always keep the doors locked. ALWAYS
> always leave a gap to the car in front.. you will be able to manoeuvre if you get boxed in from the back.. and if the worst happens and you get shunted (yes I have had this) then you will not be in even more trouble at your front
> NEVER get out of your vehicle.. if you are run off road or run to a halt make certain you are ready to go again ASAP
and although it is not the done thing especially for guys.. try non-resistance and if you see someone tailgating or being aggressive do your utmost to let them by.. it is not your problem that they are driving illegally.. the best you can do if you are upset at this is to hope for some poetic justice at best.. but at worst they are not so large in your rearview and you have let them go..

Good luck

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Ants]

I say you are lucky! As a parent did you think what whould happen if that other driver or their friend had a weapon, Where would your kids be?

 

[Ants]

Then again I'm torn because often I want to do the same thing that you did but know that because I am a cop I would lose my job because their is a choice to be made to actually stop your vehicle and get into a physical confrontation that didn't need to take place.

I think for the future it is probably best to assume that the other driver has a knife or weapon and so does their passenger - stay in your car with locked doors and call the Police so that you kids still have a parent to take them home.

 

[Jade Tigress]

That's a very scary situation indeed and I'm glad you and children came out of it safely.

All I can say is I think your response was normal. Your adrenaline gets pumping and parental instinct kicks in. Yes, they could have had a weapon, but they also could have caused considerable harm or death with the way they were using their vehicle against you.

What you did was to defend yourself and your children by any means necessary. You were backed into a corner the way I see it. Road rage is a scary thing. Put a hunk of metal around someone and they think they're invinsible.

While I don't recomend people engage in road rage behaviors, and that if you can drive to a police station during a road rage attack then do it, but I must admit to some glee when good people stand up for themselves and not let bullies get away with that kind of crap.

Again, I am thankful the situation ended with the ultimate safety of you and your family. :asian:

 

[Grenadier]

You were certainly justified in using force.

When it comes down to it, not only was your life in danger, but also the lives of your children, which makes it even more justified.

While it's always a good idea to try avoiding the conflict in the first place, sometimes, you get stuck in a situation (not your fault) that can make things unavoidable. When that happens, you'd better fight, and fight to the best of your ability.

Jenna has already summarized the rest of the things that I wanted to say about trying your darndest to avoid contact with a rager.

 

[painstain]

i would have left had i felt they would not have followed me. plus they blocked me every time i tried to leave. i will surely never lock myself into a car to be terrorized and who knows what else. windows won't stop a bullet either. but if i can control the physical confrontation which i don't know til i'm in it, then i can assure the safety of my children. but i won't just do nothing if i'm being attacked. and to me the attack had started and i can't say i'd do it differently. this happened about a month and a half ago.

respectfully,
painstain

 

[still learning]

Hello, You were lucky....keep in mind alot of road rages...people carry guns,knives,clubs.

Anytime it is one against two or more...could mean more trouble than most can handle.

Anyway things work out for you....be more wise and do not let the others(road rage) get to you...always drive to the nearest public place with lots of people around before you stop.

Never try to get into a contest and let them win..........Aloha

PS: I agree with above..do not stare or give a ugly look..smile and wave nicely and hopefull they will move on..........Better to lose and live another day.

 

[Swordlady]

Oh wow...that was a pretty intense situation you were in. Jenna and everyone else already gave you some good pointers, so I don't want to be redundant. Just please be careful, especially since you have children. Getting into a physical confrontation should be a last resort (i.e., if you absolutely have NO other options). Glad that you and your family are safe.

 

[pstarr]

Glad that you and your children are okay! Like the others, I'd worry about the creeps having weapons - but if you couldn't drive away, you did the right thing.

And - nice punch! :uhyeah:

 

[BrandiJo]

iv only been driving for 2 years, and iv been in some scary places but none like that where i couldnt get away
​

 

[MJS]

i was headed to my parents house with all my children in the van with me.
two guys in another car was bullying everyone around them with their vehicle. they drive next to me and i just looked at em. just for looking at them i became a target. they got behind me riding so close i couldn't see anything but their windshield in my rear view mirror. i sped up they sped up then i slowed to almost a stop. they pulled up next to me and flicked a cigarette into my window then they got in front of me and stopped. i tried to go around but they kept blocking me. i got out of my van and rushed the driver while he was getting out. i couldn't collect myself i was so freakin scared and angry. all i could think is that my kids are ganna see me get my head kicked in. like i said i rushed the driver while he was getting out. i slammed his door back and fourth with him inbetween the door and the driver seat. the passenger had gotten out and had his arm around my throat trying to pull me to the ground. i'm a small guy (5.8 150) i was able to get out of his grip and ended up behind and i laid the hardest center punch into that guys spine that i had ever delivered. the driver was in obvious pain holding onto his shins and bleeding from his chest from catching the corner of the door. now while this was going on and i'm sure it wasn't a long time i looked over to my van and an off duty police officer had stopped and was just looking in on my kids. he also called the police thankfully. he told me he thought i was an officer or atleast a military person by the way i handled it. all the time people were gathering and NOT helping. the off duty police officer allowed me to just leave and thats just what i did. the point?? there isn't one. i was scared for my kids and didn't know what else to do. the guys would not let me drive away. when i punched the passenger in the back as hard as i possible could he dropped and didn't even try to get back up. he knew him and his partner were about to go to jail. has anyone else here had a scary road rage incident.

Glad to hear that things went well with you. Out of curiosity, did you have a cell phone with you? I ask this because IMO, getting out of the car, for the reasons already mentioned should be a last resort. Calling the Police and getting some assistance would be the best route to go.

As for people not helping...many times people do not want to get involved for fear of retaliation, getting injured themselves while coming to your aid, etc.

I'd be interested to know what happened after the Police arrived.

Mike

 

[Shaolinwind]

Being a motorcyclist, that is I ride motorcycle and I own no car, I am constantly put in dangerous situations. The bay area is full of jerks who have little eyesight. And can you believe someone who almost ran me off the road changing lanes without looking called ME an A-hole? Something about mobility makes people madmen. And sometimes, I think a reality check is in order. I hope these two tweakers got a good lesson. The only thing I think you did wrong is not kicking one of them in the face.

i was headed to my parents house with all my children in the van with me.
two guys in another car was bullying everyone around them with their vehicle. they drive next to me and i just looked at em. just for looking at them i became a target. they got behind me riding so close i couldn't see anything but their windshield in my rear view mirror. i sped up they sped up then i slowed to almost a stop. they pulled up next to me and flicked a cigarette into my window then they got in front of me and stopped. i tried to go around but they kept blocking me. i got out of my van and rushed the driver while he was getting out. i couldn't collect myself i was so freakin scared and angry. all i could think is that my kids are ganna see me get my head kicked in. like i said i rushed the driver while he was getting out. i slammed his door back and fourth with him inbetween the door and the driver seat. the passenger had gotten out and had his arm around my throat trying to pull me to the ground. i'm a small guy (5.8 150) i was able to get out of his grip and ended up behind and i laid the hardest center punch into that guys spine that i had ever delivered. the driver was in obvious pain holding onto his shins and bleeding from his chest from catching the corner of the door. now while this was going on and i'm sure it wasn't a long time i looked over to my van and an off duty police officer had stopped and was just looking in on my kids. he also called the police thankfully. he told me he thought i was an officer or atleast a military person by the way i handled it. all the time people were gathering and NOT helping. the off duty police officer allowed me to just leave and thats just what i did. the point?? there isn't one. i was scared for my kids and didn't know what else to do. the guys would not let me drive away. when i punched the passenger in the back as hard as i possible could he dropped and didn't even try to get back up. he knew him and his partner were about to go to jail. has anyone else here had a scary road rage incident.

 

[painstain]

no i don't have a cell phone, never have. and trust me i would have left if i could have. i was in a public place, that did no good. and i will never lock myself into the vehicle, that gives them the upper hand. i felt the best thing i could do was to keep the driver from ever making it out of the door and i did.

i already practice every precaution regularly and try to avoid confrontation altogether. but in this situation, i had no choice.

with respect
painstain

 

[crushing]

I'm glad you and your children are fine.

Have you changed your license plates since the incident, or would that be going overboard? I would definately consider it.

I've only gotten out of my car once for a road rage incident. It was between two other drivers. I thought some whacked out guy was going to kill an elderly man. Fortunately, a man in another vehicle stopped too and we both walked up on them. The whacked out guy kept saying "This old man is trying to kill me. He's trying to kill me." The old guy was trying to get out of his car and that other guy shut his door on him. We told the man that he has nothing to gain and that he should just leave. After a few tense moments he finally stormed back to his white van and sped off. The old guy was alright, but a little shaken.

 

[Bigshadow]

Under the circumstances you described, I believe you probably did what was appropriate. The threat to your and your children's lives was already underway. Sounds like they gave you no option by getting in front of you like that and stopping like they did. Although, it isn't a good idea to get out, I believe you didn't have much alternatives to work with as they certainly were not fearful of causing someone an accident.

I am glad to hear you and the children made it through OK. Good for you! Maybe those guys will think about it now before threatening other people's lives.

 

[trueaspirer]

Wow. I'm not sure you might entirely the right choice, but you certainly cannot be blamed for that because at times like that instinct takes over, and there's nothing else you could, or probably should, do. Relating to this, have you ever read the book "The gift of fear"?

 

[painstain]

i haven't read it, who wrote it i will look for it.


thank you all for your advice. i love being a martial artists for this reason: you share a scary memory and everyone iis concerned. don't have to be from each others system to show concern and the value of life. this is what seperates us from non martial artists or at least from bullies.
with respect,

painstain

 

[evenflow1121]

I dont really have a road rage story as bad as yours I must say, I am glad you all are safe. The worse I have ever come to was going to the gym about 5:45 AM and having some dude my guess is he was late for work or something, flashing his high beams and honking the horn and getting real close to my bumper. I pretty much ignored it I figured as stupid as he was driving he wouldnt want to hit my car, the cost of fixing I am sure would have been high. But in your case however, I say you did the right thing, those idiots got off easy in my opinion for endangering the lives of children the way they did.