Register Your Hands - Only 19.95!

[astrobiologist]

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha... and so on........

I used to laugh at the kids in school who said that since I was a black belt I must have had my hands registered as lethal weapons. I honestly have no idea where this rumor could have started. I mean, seriously, martial artists are not registered as lethal weapons; we're just people. I wonder what the history of this rumor is. I've tried to do some research, but to no avail. All of my online research has brought back subjective reports and speculation.

I wonder if we here at MartialTalk could put an end to this rumor together.

 

[jks9199]

Why idiocy? I think warning someone to quit what he's doing before he gets tased is perfectly ok and good practice. Plus, if you get hit with a taser yourself then you might be less trigger happy with one because you know it's no fun to put give or take 4 million volts (I actually don't know how much voltage it is but I just wanted to make reference to the DEAD PARROT) through the human body. Do tasers have triggers? You know what I mean.

The call of "taser, taser, taser" is only minimally aimed at the potential target. You'll probably already have informed him (if the situation is appropriate) that if he doesn't stop being stupid in whatever way he's choosing to be stupid, he's going to ride the lightening for 5 seconds. You may even have tried to drive the point home by giving him a light show... The "taser, taser, taser" is a warning and notice to other cops around you... so that they can take appropriate steps to be ready to support you. And it lets the world around you know that you aren't shooting the idjit dead.

 

[GuroJason]

The call of "taser, taser, taser" is only minimally aimed at the potential target. You'll probably already have informed him (if the situation is appropriate) that if he doesn't stop being stupid in whatever way he's choosing to be stupid, he's going to ride the lightening for 5 seconds. You may even have tried to drive the point home by giving him a light show... The "taser, taser, taser" is a warning and notice to other cops around you... so that they can take appropriate steps to be ready to support you. And it lets the world around you know that you aren't shooting the idjit dead.

These are all great points. I don't have any experience with law enforcement, but it seems to me like the ideas formerly referred to as "idiocy" are actually quite sound, and very much not idiocy. I'm still curious what Big Don meant by that post. Elaborate for us, Big Don!

It's true that the police are probably not required to shoot themselves before being allowed to carry a gun, but I don't think a taser and a handgun are the same thing. A taser might be taken more lightly, and therefore be abused, by someone who has never experienced being hit with one, so that's why I would imagine that it's required that you get hit by one to be able to carry one.

On the other hand, it's pretty common knowledge that gun + bullet + trigger pulling = dead or wounded severely, so the two aren't exactly in the same ball park.

 

[Shicomm]

So funny and yet so sad...

***

You can do the deluxe registration also !
Just add some more money for the bonus ... you can even do a bit of the forms yourself.
See here

 

[Andrew Green]

gonna be honest, slightly tempted to get my hands registered in "Drunken penguin ninjitsu"...

 

[CoryKS]

I wonder if they offer a "Register Your Feet" option for the TKD aficionados.

 

[Xue Sheng]

I wonder if they offer a "Register Your Feet" option for the TKD aficionados.

Hmm, I had not thought of that, registering your hands would be of little use if you were trained in say Savate... and what do you register if you do Judo or Shuaijiao

 

[Andrew Green]

Hmm, I had not thought of that, registering your hands would be of little use if you were trained in say Savate... and what do you register if you do Judo or Shuaijiao

Or Kiai-jitsu, you'd have to register your voice

 

[Brian S]

gonna be honest, slightly tempted to get my hands registered in "Drunken penguin ninjitsu"...

BWAHAHA!!! I didn't think of that!!

 

[Brian S]

Actually several are registered under judo, one in kendo,lol. ???

The most registered art is Tae Kwon Do. Says alot about the art anymore. Ruined!!

 

[CoryKS]

Hmm, I had not thought of that, registering your hands would be of little use if you were trained in say Savate... and what do you register if you do Judo or Shuaijiao

I guess they could open it up as a general "Register your ______ as a deadly weapon" form. I'm sure nobody will abuse that feature.

 

[celtic_crippler]

I'm glad I didn't see any Kenpoist on there. :uhyeah:

 

[hogstooth]

OMG. My prayers have been answered. I always wanted to be registered as a deadly weapon. I wonder if I pay more could I be registered as a weapon of mass destruction. God that is pathetic. Talk about playing into urban myths. Just plain stupid.
:bs:

 

[celtic_crippler]

Does anybody have a link to register the rest of my body?

How about other bodily functions like anal vapor and halitosis? Those things can be pretty deadly too....it's like anatomical chemical warefare.

 

[Big Don]

Hmm, I had not thought of that, registering your hands would be of little use if you were trained in say Savate... and what do you register if you do Judo or Shuaijiao

Hips? I dated a few girls whose hips should have been registered, not as deadly, but, distracting as all get out...

 

[Deaf Smith]

We should just register minds. After all, the mind is the weapon, everything else is just a tool.

Come to think of it we do. It's called an ID.

Deaf

 

[Mimir]

This was one of the questions on the written test I had to take for my blackbelt. No the answer was not "Yes - immediately go to this site"
:bs:
The really sad part is that they have ANY customers at all.

 

[Perpetual White Belt]

I guess they could open it up as a general "Register your ______ as a deadly weapon" form. I'm sure nobody will abuse that feature.

I thought of this as well, and have already abused the feature...

 

[Perpetual White Belt]

How come I didn't see Frank Dux on there? Isn't he the deadliest of all?

Both he and Ashada Kim are registered worldwide. They're just so Ninja-y that you can't even see their names. :ninja: