Parents Should Have to Take Some Trial Classes!

[tsd]

nurturing is mommies job.

As a Mommy and a Martial Artist I am nurturing to both my children and my students. The trick is the right nurture for that child at that time....no small feat for mommy martial artists, but easier to accomplish if one is training.

 

[Lynne]

That wasn't an exaggeration about the adult/teenager (same class) warmups. (We don't always do wall kicks though - sometimes we do squat thrusts and laps...) We are allowed to modify but we have to keep moving. I can't do 100 pushups without modification. Also, I can't do 100 leg lifts (after a load of crunches) so I do something else.

I haven't observed the children's warmups. Sorry, I didn't intend to mislead. Now, I'm curious about their warmups. I'm sure their warm up is no walk in the park though.

Regarding the boy who failed his test, he was only 9 or 10. I bet he thought he was ready. My attitude would have been, "Let's talk to Master R and find out what you need to work on. We'll make sure you are ready next time." I think I was offended because his mother was yelling at him and actually angry.

I would not hold an instructor accountable for a child's failure in my Dojang. I see how hard our instructors work with these kids. We have the black belt instructors on the floor as well as Red Belts (Red Belts must teach a children's class every week). Our instructors are very, very good. A lot of parents enroll their children because they are discipline problems. That has to be tough for an instructor. You know some of the kids are manipulators and disrespectful when they come in.

On the otherhand, if a student does well, I believe it's because they have a good instructor(s).

The woman who wanted Kacey to nurture her child is a whacko. She's abdicating her parental responsibility to someone else.

I think introducing parents to MA philosophy is a fantastic idea. When someone walks into our school, I would think they'd get it though. Our student creeds are written on the wall (they're about our quest to be the best, discipline, perseverance, and so on). We have pamphlets that go over requirements for each belt. Discipline and etiquette are underscored in some fashion or another throughout the pamphlets. But, of course, I realize some people don't bother to read these things. *rolls eyes*

 

[Balrog]

When a new student comes in for an demo/intro lesson, I require the parents to join in. That way, they really get a feel for our teaching style and techniques. It also makes it not so "scary" for the younger ones if the folks are there.

And quite often, the parents will decide to join based on that intro lesson.

 

[Lynne]

When a new student comes in for an demo/intro lesson, I require the parents to join in. That way, they really get a feel for our teaching style and techniques. It also makes it not so "scary" for the younger ones if the folks are there.

And quite often, the parents will decide to join based on that intro lesson.

How smart you are! I would have joined months ago had I had a trial lesson with my daughter.

I was intimidated by the warm ups and, later, the forms. At the same time, I watched every class and was fascinated. Honestly, I was thinking, "Maybe when I lose 20 pounds and get in shape, I can give it a try."

Finally, they had buddy week where a student could bring a friend. My daughter asked me to go. I said, "I don't know..." She was persistent and finally said, "Mom, you're going!" Lol, the 17 year-old stinker. I loved my trial class although I had to do running jump sidekicks (still haven't learned it as it's higher rank move) and my daughter's highest orange belt form. Go up the middle? Of what!!

You know what really inspired me? I had several students come up to me and tell me that I did great, that they could tell I put a lot of effort into it. That meant a lot, that someone could tell I was trying. So, I hope you encourage the parents who are trying. It means a lot.

 

[Kacey]

Regarding the boy who failed his test, he was only 9 or 10. I bet he thought he was ready. My attitude would have been, "Let's talk to Master R and find out what you need to work on. We'll make sure you are ready next time." I think I was offended because his mother was yelling at him and actually angry.

As an instructor, it is my job to determine who is ready, and when - not the students. This goes for adults as well as kids. If I allow a student to test who is not ready, that is my fault. On the other hand, if I allow a student to test who is capable of passing, and the student performs badly, that may or may not be my fault. Lack of effort on the student's part is the student's fault; something going on in the student's life that affects the student's ability to pass... it depends. One of my students tested for BB and had some problems - but it was because her father had just completed chemo for prostate cancer; watching his then 17 year-old test was the first time he'd been out of the house since he finished, and they weren't sure of his prognosis at the time (he's fine now, and it's been 4 years) - she had an excuse to be a little off, and appropriate allowances were made. Another student I know celebrated too much the night before testing, showed up horribly hung-over, and flunked... and that was his own fault.

I would not hold an instructor accountable for a child's failure in my Dojang. I see how hard our instructors work with these kids. We have the black belt instructors on the floor as well as Red Belts (Red Belts must teach a children's class every week). Our instructors are very, very good. A lot of parents enroll their children because they are discipline problems. That has to be tough for an instructor. You know some of the kids are manipulators and disrespectful when they come in.

I would not hold an instructor responsible for a child's failure outside the dojang... inside, yes. Students should either learn to behave appropriately for their rank and MA, or they should not be allowed in the dojang. I have had students who were not allowed to re-enroll (rare), and students who chose not to re-enroll because they didn't want to work hard enough to meet my expectations (rare, but less so than the first one). As an instructor, it is my responsibility to provide an appropriate environment for all students, and to help them achieve success - and if they don't, it is my fault. I have had plenty of parents ask me how to get their kids to behave for them at home the way they do for me at the dojang; the difference is, I'm not their parent, the dojang is not their home, and the circumstances are different. Students behave, or their are consequences. In very extreme circumstances, the consequence is losing the privilege of attending class - generally when the safety of other students is impacted.

On the otherhand, if a student does well, I believe it's because they have a good instructor(s).

See, I have a problem with the dichotomy here - if the child does well, it's because of the instructor, but if the child does poorly, it's everyone else. I don't think you can have it both ways.

The woman who wanted Kacey to nurture her child is a whacko. She's abdicating her parental responsibility to someone else.

Sort of; the kid was spoiled rotten, and had no idea how to handle anything other than being told how wonderful he was; other parents whose kids went to the same elementary school said mom had the same problems with his teacher each year.

 

[Lynne]

As an instructor, it is my job to determine who is ready, and when - not the students. This goes for adults as well as kids. If I allow a student to test who is not ready, that is my fault. On the other hand, if I allow a student to test who is capable of passing, and the student performs badly, that may or may not be my fault. Lack of effort on the student's part is the student's fault; something going on in the student's life that affects the student's ability to pass... it depends. One of my students tested for BB and had some problems - but it was because her father had just completed chemo for prostate cancer; watching his then 17 year-old test was the first time he'd been out of the house since he finished, and they weren't sure of his prognosis at the time (he's fine now, and it's been 4 years) - she had an excuse to be a little off, and appropriate allowances were made. Another student I know celebrated too much the night before testing, showed up horribly hung-over, and flunked... and that was his own fault.



I would not hold an instructor responsible for a child's failure outside the dojang... inside, yes. Students should either learn to behave appropriately for their rank and MA, or they should not be allowed in the dojang. I have had students who were not allowed to re-enroll (rare), and students who chose not to re-enroll because they didn't want to work hard enough to meet my expectations (rare, but less so than the first one). As an instructor, it is my responsibility to provide an appropriate environment for all students, and to help them achieve success - and if they don't, it is my fault. I have had plenty of parents ask me how to get their kids to behave for them at home the way they do for me at the dojang; the difference is, I'm not their parent, the dojang is not their home, and the circumstances are different. Students behave, or their are consequences. In very extreme circumstances, the consequence is losing the privilege of attending class - generally when the safety of other students is impacted.



See, I have a problem with the dichotomy here - if the child does well, it's because of the instructor, but if the child does poorly, it's everyone else. I don't think you can have it both ways.



Sort of; the kid was spoiled rotten, and had no idea how to handle anything other than being told how wonderful he was; other parents whose kids went to the same elementary school said mom had the same problems with his teacher each year.

What a tough job you have, Kacey.

I can understand what you're saying about the dichotomy, especially from the standpoint that students should not be tested unless they are guaged ready