Martial Artist Significant Others

[Phoenix44]

My partner is a martial artist, as are our kids. It definitely enhances the relationship.

If I couldn't be with a martial artist, I'd have to be with someone who is passionate about something--art, music, basketweaving, anything. It would be the only way he'd understand.

 

[Ceicei]

I was in Kenpo before I married my husband, so he knew already of my passion. He did take Karate during high school for a month or two. After we married, he decided to sign up and train with me for a year. He found it wasn't his thing, but he does have a very strong respect for the time and work involved with training. We have four children and three of the four train in Kenpo (my youngest is not ready yet). My husband supports and encourages all of us. When I chose to cross-train in in a second style (Jujitsu), he did not try to stop me, although he does worry more about me (since I had two surgeries as a result of jujitsu).

- Ceicei

 

[IcemanSK]

When I met my wife she knew I was pretty hard core. I talked about it & trained all the time. She's the type of person who "needs to understand" the things important folks in her life do. She would watch me train & ask lots of questions after. She has a great appreciation for the arts.

 

[MJS]

Same story, difference is I've been married 29 years. I think she actually looks forward to me going to class so she can have some alone time

Cool! Yeah, same here. She has her things that she does with her friends and the same for me. We have our time with each other as well. Personally, I think that it helps make a relationship stronger if there is that seperate time instead of always being together day after day.

My wife respects that I train, she just can't understand why I would subject myself to it. :lol:

LOL, funny you should say that. I get that look when I come home with the 'war wounds'

Mike

 

[MA-Caver]

I'm not married but if I do find that SO then I'd probably would like for her to get involved and start training. I agree with some of the others who felt that it helps the relationship because you both have some common ground to share... even if you're doing different arts you still can have lively conversations with each other about MA and even bounce moves/techniques off each other just for the fun of it.
But for me I'd feel better knowing that she is doing something that is multi-benficial; self-protection, and excercise to name a few ... I also heard that it helps the sex life too :uhyeah:

 

[stickarts]

I think it boils down to your spouse understanding how important martial arts is to you and being supportive of that. I have seen good relationships and troubled relationships when spouses are involved, and equally when they are not involved in martial arts.
If a spouse or a potential future spouse does not support what is important to you than that is a red flag in the relationship!

 

[bydand]

If a spouse or a potential future spouse does not support what is important to you than that is a red flag in the relationship!

Take heed to these words. A truer statement has probably never been uttered. I am lucky, very lucky; my wife supports things that are important to me, and I support the things that are important to her. I think if you are to really be SO's then it isn't just support, but also very important to you as well.

 

[Fluffy]

Very immportant, my wife is a 2nd Dan and an operations manager for my school. I made sure I married someone who understands all my bumps and bruises.

 

[Lisa]

Take heed to these words. A truer statement has probably never been uttered. I am lucky, very lucky; my wife supports things that are important to me, and I support the things that are important to her. I think if you are to really be SO's then it isn't just support, but also very important to you as well.

I agree also. Part of who I fell in love with was the gun shooting, hunting, firearm loving, competitor that my husband is. Wouldn't want him to change, that would not be fair.

 

[fnorfurfoot]

Before we got married, my wife and I started Kempo together almost 12 years ago. We got our yellow belts together before she had to go back to college. She didn't get back into it until last year.

In the mean time, I had opened my own school and had also been training our son for the past 4 years. She had no interest to train but she wanted to have a say in how I ran my school. It was my school because she did not train at the time. I didn't really feel that she should have any say since her only interest in the art was how much money it was making us.

Now that she has returned to training, she helps with my children's classes. Teaching my wife is tricky. It's hard to know how hard you can go before you hear about it at home. For the most part, what happens at the dojo, stays in the dojo, but you know that complaints will come if she feels that you are going too hard.

 

[chris_มวยไทย]

my girlfreind doesnt do a martial art and probably never will , however she does respect the fact that its a big part of my life and is always interested in it and likes me to teach her techniques when were play fighting :boxing:

 

[matt.m]

Since my dad is a hapkido master my wife has been overly supportive of me training. Tae kwon do has been an awesome way of physical therapy for me as well.

 

[Rich Parsons]

They should respect and understand why I train, teach and have a passion called Martial Arts.

 

[Arizona Angel]

It's not bad at all to have your significant other in class with you, but at home, one on one, that's another story. Someday I am sure I will figure out how to do that sucessfully since Kenpo is a way of life, not some sort of entertainment.

 

[MA-Caver]

I went ahead and pirated this thread/poll onto another discussion board because I was curious about my OTHER favorite activity (caving). Of course it's re-worded to fit the forum. It's getting good responses now and this is one of them from a gal I know. (my own explainatory comments are in italics)

If you're female, having a caving significant other solves a lot of problems.

No one thinks it strange when you go on a trip and 80% of the participants are men (They're other cavers. Do they count?) or you go out for beer with the boys.

The kids don't think it's an insult when someone says, "Yer mama wears combat boots." (Yeah. So?)

You both do laundry. The groady kind.

You don't have to explain that yes, you DO have to strip to the skin in mixed company after a trip, or risk freezing to death. (they've been there, too.) (clothes can be quite muddy after certian cave trips...)

There is nothing unusual, at the end of the day, to find stray bits of unrecognized clothing in the car.

No explanation is needed when one says, "I'll go to bed after I (finish the grotto newsletter, print the membership cards, get done packing, clean my lights,
find my (insert lost caving article here), pack my pig (an improvised caving pack made from two gallon bleach jugs) , answer this email from some stranger looking to take 50 scouts to a cave tomorrow.)

They understand when you want to wear your helmet and light to the theater-- they'll find theirs and come along, too.

They know why you prefer to clean someone else's cave than your own house, and you think camel crickets in the basement are way cool.

Wouldn't trade them for a million dollars and a mansion in the 'right' part of town.

 

[charyuop]

Before I met my wife she was doing MA, while the only interest I had in MA was watching kung fu movies. She quit MA and then we met. We have been married 5 years now. In the meanwhile I started Tai Chi and of course as ex MAist she supported. I then dragged her into Tai Chi as remedy to her artrites and now we do Tai Chi together.
Tomorrow I will start Aikido and when I told her she was happy for me to start that too.

But is it crucial to have a MAist near you? No, and I can't even expect for the partner to undertsand. If someone is not in MA it is normal that might get worried for you to get hurt or injured, thus he/she might not fully approve. The important is that there is no interference in the training.

 

[Haze]

I started training after we had been married about 5 years. My wife had and still has no interest in it for herself but does support me.

Same as I have no interest in pilates. Just not for me right now.

We have talked about getting into a TaiChi class together.
Maybe it will happen.

We have interests in common and we have are own interests. I think this makes for a stronger relationship.

(and she can probably kick my a** without any training,,,,,,,,,,,LOL)

 

[Shawn]

About 8 years ago I started dating the woman that became my wife just this year. When we started dating I was training 4-5 evenings a week, and I think she started coming to classes with me just to spend a little more time together.

Training together was great. We always got along well in class while training.

In the last year I've opened my own school. In many ways having my wife there is a huge asset. She knows the material, and helps new students (especially women) get started in class. She looks impressive and pleases students when she kicks my *** in demos . But teaching her, or correcting her in class, often causes strained moments. Not always, and not for long, but it does come up.

Its important to me that my partner be involved in the martial arts, but it may not be the best idea to have your partner as a student.

Shawn

 

[Mariachi Joe]

My wife and I started together but she quit after 7 months, said it was not interesting anymore and started doing a belly dancing class. She let's me train though so I'm cool.