Japaneese taboos...

[Don Roley]

Actually, now that I think about it, my Navy "boot camp" could more accurately have been called a "school for boys." No joke. The Navy concentrates more on mental tear down than physical. LOL.

And I assume you feel you came out the better for it? Of course, trying to compare navy :barf: basic training with a real military's basic training is a little off topic. hee hee hee.

But you understand how the biggest challenges you face will not be the ones placed on your body, but on your spirit. I remember being dropped for pushups and hating it. It was not because of the ache in my muscles, but the shame I felt in letting down my unit and ultimatly myself that caused me grief. By comparison, I remember one time when we were begging the West Point plebe to drop us in the rain and mud so that we could show our spirit by chanting, "we love the rain- ONE!" This was right after we had done a dance in the tear gas chamber.

Guess what, it is the same in taijutsu. You will get hit in the face and other parts of your body. I got a kyoketsu shoge shoved into my back with enough force to give my muscle spasms today at a demonstration. That is nothing. It is facing the fact that you are not being as good as you can, that you are letting down people that have put so much time into helping you that will bother you at night and not let you sleep. That is, if you are the type of person caring about.

Are you?

Don't tell me, show me. Let me know with your actions instead of trying to get on my good side with what you say. You know how people have tried to explain away their mistakes and failings to the drill instructors. Did they ever get any better? Or was it a wiser choice to shut up and just show this pompus, ignorant, unfeeling son- of- a- she- dog that you would do better no matter how much they screamed at you?

 

[Satt]

Oh yeah, by the way, NAVY BEAT ARMY YESTERDAY!!!!!!! LOL. :2xBird2:

 

[Don Roley]

Oh yeah, by the way, NAVY BEAT ARMY YESTERDAY!!!!!!! LOL. :2xBird2:

I hate football anyways.

 

[sojobow]

Jason,

Don't listen to any of the naysayers say you can't do this. You can do anything you put your mind, heart, and soul to. Keep up your training!

This is the best advice yet for Jason. I would only ad that as a student, keep your spine straight and don't back off or bow down to anyone. Respect your Sensei and cut the rest twice when confronted wrongly as you have been in this thread.

If you have questions or concerns, post them. It is our choice to answer if we so incline or don't answer if we have no answer. Think I read a Soke stating that he'd cut god if god got in the way (or something like that). Stop apologizing. You did nothing wrong.

 

[Grey Eyed Bandit]

No, you saw it in Kill Bill.

 

[Bester]

Well, since the subject is Japanese Taboos (and not the porno movie at that....)

I got this a while ago in my email. How true is this long winding message?

=

Realfighting Newsletter #46 - August 29, 2004
​

Some Things to Know Before you travel to Japan
​

Japan is a fun place to visit, there’s no place on earth remotely like it, it’s like going to a giant theme park, there’s always something interesting to see or do. Whether you go for vacation or training, it can be a very unique and rewarding experience. For those interested in fight training, there are of course traditional martial arts schools, but for the serious fight student, there are many top-tier No-Holds-Barred (NHB) training centers that prepare fighter’s for Pride, Shooto, the UFC and other similar venues.



Although Japan looks like any other civilized western city, don’t let this facade fool you. Just because Japanese wear western clothes, manufacture western products and are enveloped in high-technology doesn’t mean their sensibilities and social structure is the same as ours, on the contrary, the Japanese are completely different than any other social group in the world, even among other Asians. Why is knowing this so important? Because in Japan, like no other place, knowing the rules can determine the quality of your visit -- it can open doors for you or slam them in your face.



I have visited and lived in Japan multiple times and recount my frustrations here in an effort to save others the annoying and confusing maze I had to wade through. The following discourse is in no way a comprehensive work on the Japanese and their society, but merely an overall guide to assist visitors in making sense of a baffling subject.



The Ancient Culture Myth

The Japanese like to think of themselves as an ancient culture; well that depends on what your definition of ancient culture is. In the mini-series, “Shogun,” the pilot’s consort makes a reference that Japan had a high civilization when European’s were only crawling out of caves. The truth is, when Athens was at its height, circa 500 BC, the Japanese were literally living in caves; culture eventually came to them via China and Korea. Furthermore, Japan at its height never attained anywhere near the level of civilization that the ancient Greeks did.



The Impenetrable Japanese

In the James Bond film “You Only Live Twice,” the Englishman (with the wooden leg) says to Bond [something to the effect of], “I’ve lived in Japan over 20 years and only now barely have begun to understand the Japanese.” Well that’s the typical nonsensical Hollywood statement -- that the Japanese are so mysterious and far and away more sophisticated than any western person could ever be; and many Japanese would have you think that as well. I don’t see it that way at all; if a 3-year old Japanese child can be fully versed in the subtleties of their culture so can you, but you need to do your homework first.



Understanding the Basics

The trick to understanding the Japanese is to view them within their sociological and cultural matrix. The two key concepts are: Individualism vs. Collectivism, and High and Low Context Cultures.



Individualism vs. Collectivism

Individualistic cultures are somewhat remote (compared to collectivistic cultures) and display less non-verbal communication (e.g. American, British and Germanic cultures). Collectivistic cultures stress cohesion as a group, and spend time in close proximity to one another (e.g. Southern Europe, many Asian cultures, especially Japan).



High and Low Context Cultures

People in low context cultures (e.g. American, British and Germanic cultures) express their thoughts and feeling directly to one another. In the west this is perceived as being straight forward and honest. Whereas people in high context cultures are more implicit in their verbal codes, and perceive highly verbal persons less attractive, they tend to be more reliant on and tuned into non-verbal communication, and have many non-verbal codes in their language.



Low-Context Cultures (e.g. American, British and Germanic cultures)

1. Overtly display meanings through direct communication

2. Value individualism

3. Develop many transitory or fleeting personal relationships.

4. Emphasize logic.

5. Value direct verbal interaction, less able to read nonverbal expressions.

6. Uses "logic" to present ideas.

7. Emphasizes highly structured messages, gives details, and places great

stress on words and technical signs.



High-Context Cultures (e.g. Southern Europe, Asia, especially Japan)

1. Implicitly embeds meanings at different levels of the sociocultural context

2. Value group sense

3. Take time to cultivate and establish permanent personal relationships

4. Deemphasizes logic

5. Value indirect verbal interactions, able to read nonverbal expressions

6. Tend to use more "feeling" in expression.

7. Tend to give simple, ambiguous, noncontexting messages.



To summarize, the Japanese are part of a “collectivistic, high context” culture; meaning, the participation of the group (group awareness) and non-verbal communication is paramount in their society. When dealing with Japanese, remember, they think and communicate in terms of their group, not the individual, and much of their communication will come through non-verbal codes they EXPECT you to know!



Some Concepts



Face

This is extremely important to the Japanese. Morality isn’t as important as saving face, not only is it embarrassing to lose face but it’s also shameful. Therefore going out of your way not to directly confront or embarrass someone will save you lots of headaches. So if someone comes up to you and speaks English in a strange way, try not to fall down laughing, you could be the cause of a major psychological catastrophe.



Haragei

This translates to “gut-feeling” about a person or a particular business venture. Many Japanese will not do business with someone if they don’t have a good feeling about. I know this makes no logic, but no one ever accused the Japanese of being logical.



Giri

This means obligation or reciprocity. This pervades daily life and is never ignored. Before you perform a generous act, be mindful that your recipient will feel obligated to return the favor in some way.



Turning Japanese

In Japan there are many European’s and American’s who are Japanophiles, or Japan lovers. Many (but not all) have no identity or pride in their homeland and think Japan embodies the pinnacle of culture, and they represent the lowly barbarian. They’ll dress in traditional Japanese clothes, learn the language perfectly, follow Japanese customs and marry a Japanese wife, while this may work nearly everywhere else in the world, it won’t work in Japan. No matter what they do, they will always be considered “gaijin” (outsiders). Even Japanese businessmen and their families who have returned from working abroad are no longer accepted in society as they were before they left.



The People

Japanese are illogical and irrational people, if you only understand this one principle, you will be way ahead of the game. They are shy, aloof and hypersensitive to what others might think of them, especially if people talk behind their backs (gossip is almost a national sport.) The Japanese are very hesitant to do anything new, different, or independent. Being ostracized is one of the worst things that can happen to Japanese, who are raised to be part of a group and depend on others. They have a saying, “The nail that sticks up, gets hit.”



Japanese (in Japan) are also extremely racist towards anyone who is non-Japanese, especially blacks (koko-jin); BUT, this is almost never expressed in hostility (although it has happened to me once). Dating a westerner may be cool for a Japanese girl, but marriage is a bit more complicated (in Japan). If you’re going to marry a Japanese girl, do her and yourself a favor, bring her back to the west.



The Language

Basic Japanese phrases are not too difficult to learn and you really don’t need to spend too much time studying the language since many subway/train, highway and local signs are romanized. In addition, the Japanese welcome any opportunity to practice English with any foreigner they meet, even on the street.



While living in Japan, the two things thing that pissed me off the most was that no one ever stated a straight yes or no, and everyone always used the same phrases -- saying the same thing over and over. I remember thinking, “Are these people robots or something?” The language actually consists of many of these standard phrases used over and over again. There are specific phrases for every occasion, it’s like cut & paste.



If you’re a male don’t learn Japanese from a female. Male and female forms of the language are a little different. Men speak with shorter phrases and the women’s form of the language is more embellished. If you speak using the women’s form, you may be perceived as being gay.



Why Don't They Mean What They Say?

No -- you can’t take what a Japanese person says literally, the language is structured to avoid any type of confrontational situation; so don’t expect a direct answer. For example, if someone says to you “That’s a little difficult” it really means “forget it.” If they say, “I’ll think about it” that really means “NO.” The phrase, “Perhaps another time” really means “Never.” If you understand these codes you’ll avoid a lot of frustration. Unfortunately I had no one to guide me and made as many enemies as I made friends.



Understanding the Real Message

Two of the most used phrases in Japan are, “Please visit my home,” and “let’s have dinner together sometime.” These are not invitations; they are rather amicable ways of saying goodbye. In general, they DO NOT mean come visit me or let’s have dinner literally. I once made the mistake of visiting a Japanese family man at his home after he invited me several times; his wife was in absolute shock, as was he when he came to the door -- I could’ve knocked him over with a feather.



You Don’t Have to Act Japanese

I really don’t like westerners who try so hard to be Japanese; the gestures are not really appreciated, and quite often they’ll laugh at you behind your back. In Japan I’ve always navigated the cultural stream with self-respect as well as respect for the local people, but I never groveled.



On Bowing

The Japanese have their own rules for this and it can get complicated but generally as a westerner, don’t bow too low, I’ve always gotten by with a slight bow of my head and neck. Some people bow very low, but that’s more like a peasant bowing to a lord, you don’t have to go that far. You can also shake hands but don’t give a strong western handshake. The Japanese shake hands in a very weak manner, try not to crush their hands.

*Note: The business card should be given after the bow.



Introductions

In introductions use the person’s last name plus the word san which means Mr. or Ms. the Japanese prefer to use last names. Never call yourself “San,” and don’t ask them to call you by your first name only, that will make them uncomfortable.



Beware of the Smile

A smile from a Japanese person can either mean pleasure or extreme discomfort. Remember this, when they smile, look at their eyes, if the eyes are smiling it’s positive, if the eyes look upset, it’s a negative sign.



Expressing Yourself

Avoid expressing your opinions too directly. Japanese have what they call "honne" (real opinion) and "tatemae" (public opinion). They will express the latter in most situations so as not to disturb the group harmony. It is of course flexible and consists of agreeing with the people around you as much as possible. This is the reason why Japanese are so bad at debating serious issues in public. "Honne" is what you really think but do not say openly, or only to close friends or relatives.



Don’t interrupt people when they’re speaking or thinking about an answer. Japanese don’t mind short periods of silence in the middle of a discussion, they actually prefer it. Periods of silence with the Japanese are the norm, whereas in the west, you’re considered a bore.



Don’t stare at people in public or even during a conversation. Japanese are not comfortable with too much eye-contact.



Watch Those Shoes

Never enter a Japanese house (or apartment) with your shoes. This is one of the few rules for which Japanese will not make allowances for just because you’re a foreigner. This rule is also valid for schools and other establishments. Slippers are usually provided in the entrance hall.

*Note: There are special slippers for the toilet, they are usually located near or in front of the toilet, use them ONLY for the toilet, NEVER use them to walk around the house.



Is it the Bathroom or the Toilet?

In Japan the toilet and the bathroom are not usually one room. More often than not, the toilet and bath areas are in separate rooms. If you wish to use the toilet the more polite term is “toire or otearai.”



The Bath

Japanese wash themselves before entering the bath, as they have a custom of sharing the bath water. The reason is that other people will use the same water after you. Therefore, you should not empty the bath after using it. In public baths, don’t mistake men and women's changing rooms, this is bad. The men's room is usually on the left, and normally has a blue curtain with "otoko" The women's room is usually on the right, with a red curtain reading "onna"

Note: Tattoos are banned in most public baths. If you have one, talk to the staff at reception beforehand to avoid causing trouble.

In Japan the whole family uses the same bath water -- as a guest you will probably be given the privilege of using the bath water first. Do NOT drain the water out after you have finished your bath!



What’s an Omiyage?

If you’re invited to a Japanese home, bring a small present called "omiyage" (usually food). For example, whenever I was invited by a friend I would go to a local pastry shop and bring a cake or cookies.



Gift giving is very important in Japan, but extravagant gifts require an equally or slightly higher extravagant gift in return. Avoid giving pricey gifts. Gifts should be given at the end of a visit; good gift ideas include top choice beef, fruit and alcohol such as brandy, quality whiskey and Bourbon along with excellent wines. They also appreciate gifts from high-end department stores like Saks and Neiman Marcus.



Always wrap gifts. The selection of the wrapping paper is critical. Don’t give anything wrapped in white as it symbolizes death. Do not use bright colors or bows to wrap the gift. It is better to have the hotel or the store warp the gift to ensure that it is appropriate. Do not give gifts in odd numbers or use the number four or fourteen, as odd numbers are bad luck and four sounds like the word for death in Japanese.



Do not surprise the recipient with the gift. Give your host some warning during the evening that you intend to give them a present. Give the gift with both hands and accept gifts with hands. Generally, gifts will not be opened in your presence. If your host insists that you open the gift do so slowly and carefully. They take pride in gift wrapping; show that you appreciate the effort.



It's polite to belittle the value of your gift or food when you offer it, even if it's blatantly untrue. In formal circumstances it's impolite to unwrap a gift someone brings you as soon as you receive it. In casual surroundings it's normal to ask the giver if it can be opened now.



Do not admire anything belonging to your host too closely. The Japanese strive to please; you may be rewarded for your admiration.



General Situations

Some shops, cafes or department stores provide plastic covers for umbrellas. Make sure not to enter with a dripping wet umbrella without one.



Blowing your Nose

Never blow your nose in front of other people. Japanese only use paper tissue for this. As in other Asian countries, it is considered rude to blow your nose in a handkerchief and stuff it in your pocket afterward.



Pointing

Don’t point your finger, feet or chopsticks at people. If you have to indicate an object or direction to someone, wave your fingers with the palm downwards.



The Feet

Never place your feet on top of tables and other objects, this is never appreciated.



Traditional Situations

In the most traditional families, (as well as traditional martial arts schools) you may be required to sit on the floor in a “seiza” position. It involves sitting on the floor with the legs folded under your body, with your back resting on your heels. I never did this, it hurt me, I just stretched my legs out in front, I didn’t care what they thought of me. Nowadays many top quality restaurants have both a tatami section and a western seating area.



Eating & drinking

The good news, the food tastes great, especially outside of Tokyo and there is no tipping. The bad news, it’s expensive. Although it’s impolite, check your bill to make sure it’s correct, there were many times when I was overcharged while dining at fancy and expensive restaurants.

If invited to a dinner, allow the host to order and pay for the meal.



The "oshibori" is a small towel (cold in summer, hot in winter) used to wipe your hands, don’t wipe your face or neck with it, it’s considered bad form.



Never pour your own drink, pour your guests drink, they will pour yours

If you don't want any more to drink, leave your glass full.



Japanese say "Itadakimasu" (pronounced without the “u”) before eating and "Gochisosama deshita" (pronounce deshita as deshta) after eating, especially if you're being treated, don’t forget "Kanpai" for "Cheers." I hardly say these phrases, you won’t have to -- Kanpai though is easy to remember.



I was once invited to have a soba (noodles) dinner with a Japanese family. As we began eating, my hosts were making these hideous slurping sounds. I couldn’t take it and stood up and asked why everyone was eating like pigs? Well that’s the way they like to eat their noodles. I find it disgusting but you’ll have to bear with it.



Don’t eat while standing or walking in the street. Even inside a house, you should sit down to eat. The only exceptions are for eating at a counter (e.g. ramen) or for eating an ice-cream in the street. This custom is one of the most difficult to adapt to for many non-Japanese, as it doesn't seem to make much sense.



When sharing a dish, put what you take on your own plate before eating it.

Don’t use your chopsticks to skewer food, move dishes around, and NEVER dish out food to another using the same ends you just ate from, use the top ends. Don't ever leave your chopsticks standing up out of your food, that’s an offering for the dead and bad luck. I once freaked out an old lady by doing that.



Traditional Japanese food is served on several small plates, it's normal to alternate between dishes instead of fully eating one dish after another. It’s traditional in Japan to pick up your rice or miso soup bowl and hold it under your chin to keep your food from falling. Don't leave a mess on your plate, fold your napkins neatly. One of the worst things you can do is crush your napkin and place it on your dish, if you want to upset someone, this is a good way. Also, don’t put soy sauce on your rice or sugar or cream in Japanese tea, this seems to upset lots of people.



Don’t mix sake with hard liquor unless you want to become extremely sick.



Business

Never be late for an appointment, use the German method, always be a little early. However, if you are invited to a social event, punctuality is not expected, it’s the custom to be "fashionably late."



Meishi

Exchanging business cards is de rigueur in formal introductions. You should extend your card to the other person with both hands, right side up to them (upside down to you). You receive cards with both hands also. Be sure to look at the card and not just pocket it. Never put it in your pants pocket and sit on it in front of them.



It is polite to put "san" after another’s name, but NEVER use these after your own.



Avoid lots of jewelry or very colorful clothes when going to work. In the past I made the mistake of wearing impressive double-breasted suits, and behind my back I was called a playboy. Wear dark blue or dark grey single breasted suits only.



White-collar Japanese typically leave the office only after their superiors have done so. Do not expect someone to be instantly free once the official business hours are over.



Avoid shouting loudly at someone to get their attention--wave, or go up to them.



Walking around with your hands in your pants pocket somehow really upsets people here. When Clinton arrived in Japan years ago he strutted around the golf course with his hands in his pockets and several newspapers made a big deal out of it.



No patting someone on the back or hugging or excessive touching is appreciated in Japan, especially in a business setting.



There is no custom of "Ladies First" here, men always go first, get used to it.



Do not chew gum when working or in other formal situations.



Avoid the "OK" sign; in Japan it means money.



Women should not wear pants in a business situation. Japanese men tend to find it offensive. Women should only wear low-heeled shoes to avoid towering over men.



Most business entertaining is done in restaurants or bars after business hours. Often in karaoke or "hostess bars." Businesswomen should never attend "hostess bars.”



There’s no health consciousness in Japan, everyone smokes a lot, get used to it.



Japan has no tradition of making sarcastic remarks to make a point, for the most part, you’ll be misunderstood.



The Japanese gesture of "Who, me?" is pointing at their nose, not their chest as in the west.



The Japanese gesture for "Come here" is to put your hand palm out, fingers up, and raise and lower your fingers a few times. The western gesture of palm-up, closing your hand is only used to call animals to you.



The Japanese gesture for “no” is fanning your hand sideways a few times in front of your face.



Never wear your slippers into a tatami (straw) mat room.



Don't wear your slippers into the “genkan” (at the entrance to a home, where the shoes are kept), nor outside.



Japanese wear kimono or yukata (light summer kimono) with the left side over the right. The reverse is only for the dead at funerals.



It's polite to initially refuse someone's offer of help. Japanese may also initially refuse your offer even if they really want it. Traditionally an offer is made three times. It may be better to state you'll carry their bag, call a taxi, etc., instead of pushing them to be polite and refuse.



It's polite to see a guest to the door (or the front of a building even) when they leave.



For taxis the driver will open/close the rear left hand door for you. This is done mechanically by the driver.



Japanese often compliment each other to promote good will, but it is polite to deny how well you speak Japanese, how nice you look, how capable you are etc.



Dating in Japan

I found dating to be extremely easy in Japan. Many times girls would just approach me and suddenly start a conversation in English, and more often than not would accompany me home. The funny thing was, the next day they acted as if our escapade never occurred. Japanese girls think it’s cool to date a foreigner but it’s much more difficult to get more seriously involved. The Japanese frown on open displays of affection. They do not touch in public. Also, it's highly inappropriate to touch someone of the opposite sex in public.



Sexual Attitudes

I found Japanese sexual attitudes to be bizarre. Once a Japanese friend visited me with a female friend. He asked me if he could leave the female with me for a few hours while he completed some chores, I replied yes, and for the next two hours tried to converse with her. When my friend came back he collected his friend and said goodbye. Later that evening he returned and asked me in these exact words, “are you a fag?” I replied no way, and he asked me why I didn’t grab the girl and have sex with her. I said that in most countries that action constitutes rape. He said no, that’s the way you have to approach Japanese girls. That girl was expecting me to ravage her? After a few reluctant attempts of doing it his way, I have to admit, that’s the way Japanese girls do it. BUT, don’t try that outside of Japan.



Things You Should Never Discuss!

There are a few topics that you should avoid if you don’t want to make enemies. Never discuss WWII; they are in denial about this. The Japanese are taught they were the victims in this war. Don’t discuss the merits of having an Emperor, never mention the yakuza, they are not supposed to exist, and avoid the topic of Japan’s outcasts (the burakumin).



OSU and the Yakuza

The term “OSU,” typically used in karate dojos throughout Japan (and other parts of the world) it’s also used by the Yakuza and common street thugs. Avoid using this term, also don’t mention you study karate, kenpo or similar arts while in Japan, especially in a business setting. Most people will not feel comfortable around you, and you’ll probably be considered an oddball or thug. These arts are practiced by relatively few people nowadays. Golf, baseball, soccer, and other western sports and held in much higher esteem than their own martial arts.





WR, President, Realfighting

 

[George Kohler]

Oh yeah, by the way, NAVY BEAT ARMY YESTERDAY!!!!!!! LOL. :2xBird2:

Hmm...Cadets wanting to be Officers...There are only a few officers that I liked. The best time I had in the Army was going through a school where Officers didn't have any rank. When I was put in a leadership position in this school I had to kick a few of them, while they were in the prone position, to keep them from sleeping. (I wish there was a icon for kicking someone that was already down) Boy, it felt good kicking an Officer without worrying about his rank. Especially, if they were from West Point. :ultracool

Jason, I would listen to Don instead of his naysayers. Don knows what he's talking about.

 

[Kizaru]

I got this a while ago in my email. How true is this long winding message?

Eating & drinking

The good news, the food tastes great, ...

Japanese say "Itadakimasu" (pronounced without the “u&#8221 before eating and ....

And the pronounciation of "Itadakimasu" has always sounded like "Eat A Dirty Mouse" to me...

 

[Kreth]

And I assume you feel you came out the better for it? Of course, trying to compare navy basic training with a real military's basic training is a little off topic. hee hee hee.

Maybe I should interject then, as an Army Doggie has no clue about real basic training... Everyone knows that ARMY stands for Ain't Ready for the Marines Yet.

Jeff

 

[Don Roley]

No Kreth, US ARMY stands for Uncle Sam Ain't Released Me Yet. :2xBird2:

 

[Kreth]

Back to the topic at hand...

-If someone gives you a business card, do not put it in your wallet if you keep your wallet in your back pocket.
-Don't tip in a restaurant. The gratutity is part of the cost of a meal. I have had a waitress follow me outside the restaurant to give me my tip back.
-It seems to be impolite to lock eyes with someone when speaking to them. Most Japanese that I've met will look at your chest.

Jeff

 

[Cryozombie]

Back to the topic at hand...

-If someone gives you a business card, do not put it in your wallet if you keep your wallet in your back pocket.
-Don't tip in a restaurant. The gratutity is part of the cost of a meal. I have had a waitress follow me outside the restaurant to give me my tip back.
-It seems to be impolite to lock eyes with someone when speaking to them. Most Japanese that I've met will look at your chest.

Jeff

Dont tip? Look at their chest?

I'd fit right in!

 

[Bester]

Japanese girls have chests? I have been watching the wrong films. I thought they only got them in anime?


Seriously, how on the mark was that article. Some of it seems a bit, odd, to me.

 

[Kizaru]

Maybe I should interject then, as an Army Doggie has no clue about real basic training... Everyone knows that ARMY stands for Ain't Ready for the Marines Yet.
Jeff

USMC? Huh? What? "Uncle Sam's Misguided Children"?

I almost became a Marine. I did really well on all the tests at the recruiter's office, but the last one I flunked...couldn't get my head in the jar!!!

 

[Don Roley]

Guys! Guys! This is getting out of hand! We need to put away all this good- humored jabs between the Navy, the Marines and the Army....

And start making fun of those sissies in the Air Force.

 

[Bob Hubbard]

Hey, I had a friend who joing the Air Force.
He went in to be a pilot.
Last I heard, he's got the job of filling in holes in runways (life expectancy 12 minutes). >_<


ok, back to topic....

 

[Don Roley]

Seriously, how on the mark was that article. Some of it seems a bit, odd, to me.

To me as well. But it is based on things that really cannot be measured or counted. I find Kreth's comments about not looking people in the eye a little strange too. I never noticed it and it does not seem to be a problem.

I think the best summery would not be to talk too much about collective cultures and all that but instead focus on the lack of space they have here. That, and the way agriculture had to be done, has kind of led to a situation where they could not be honest and tell people off and then go off into a corner. They were pretty much forced into a situation where they would see each other on a near daily basis. In America, you could tellt he whole community to buzz off, move a few miles away and start up a farm. Heck, America was founded largely by people who told folks in Europe to go to hell and moved over the sea. With the lack of usable agricultural land and the need for waterways for rice crops, that was not much of an option for the Japanese.

In those cases, you make sure that nothing even closely disharmonious goes on above sea level. Everything that goes on, does so beneath the surface. When you see someone face to face you smile and ask how their kids are. Later on, you release steam with your frineds as you talk about him. This is done in an "in-group" of compatriots and not in public.

So you can't say something honestly if it may cause troubles in the least. If someone asks you what they think of something they did in the west, you would tell them straight off how you thought they could improve it. In Japan you have to ask three times and get two "hey I really like it" before they will point out problems. If they did not do that, then there may be trouble and they will have to work with you in the near future.

Getting people to talk about unpleasent things in public is a bit like pulling teeth for this reason. There are exceptions. Anytime there is some famous person who will trash another person on camera the media laps it up for the great ratings. And then they will cover with glee the person's plummeting status and reputation. People love watching uncouth folks like on the Jerry Springer Show, but that does not mean that everyone acts like that or that it is proper behavior.

In short, I think you have to be kind of like a long tailed cat in a racking chair factory in the level of paranoia you have. You can't wait for someone to tell you that you are doing wrong. You have to ask yourself if what you are about to do will cause trouble. And if you get a compliment or comment, you have to ask if they are trying to get you to question on your own the meanings behind it.

Yeah, and people wonder why I drink so much.

 

[Bester]

So, obviously being a rabid fan of Iron Chef will not give one enough of a clue, huh?

 

[Kreth]

I find Kreth's comments about not looking people in the eye a little strange too. I never noticed it and it does not seem to be a problem.

I think this is something I was told to me when I was stationed in Okinawa during that late 80s... :idunno:

Jeff

 

[Captain Harlock]

One that I believe was mentioned, however should be repeated.
Remember you are not in the US anymore. The laws, and customs, and social behaviors are different.
You are a guest.
Be respectful, polite and behave conservatively.