I've got a situation...

[deadhand31]

Well, let's look at it this way...

-I've taken a week of my vacation twice that the Sabunim has known about to cover for my instructor's vacation on two occasions. I actually have a key so I can open the school in emergencies.

-Every day he gets a running toll of all the people who help out in the classes, as we also have a running attendance board that is updated daily.

-Last Friday, I was the person in the office during a heavy snow day since my instructor was on a trip. I spoke with my sabunim several times throughout the day regarding the weather situation.

So, in other words, there's no way that he doesn't know what I've put in.

I don't want to sound like I'm boasting, but I have given A LOT to the school. If the rule is no one gets any type of reimbursement, or break, then I would understand that. But if some people are given special treatment when they haven't given as much as others, then that's where I start to take issue.

 

[Kacey]

I don't want to sound like I'm boasting, but I have given A LOT to the school. If the rule is no one gets any type of reimbursement, or break, then I would understand that. But if some people are given special treatment when they haven't given as much as others, then that's where I start to take issue.

I agree and I don't. At one point in my life, I was extremely broke (recently divorced) and I was given a cut on my organization dues based on the fact that I was working as an assistant instructor - something other people didn't get. It was a recognition of my participation and assistance at classes, tournaments, seminars, and other events, which I wasn't paid for; no one was - but not many people helped at everything, either - based on my participation and financial circumstances, my dues were waived. The thing is, no one told me that was why they were waived; they told me that dues were waived for all assistant instructors... so when I talked about it, unknowingly, it got me in trouble. But that's a different story.

My point it, if people are being treated differently, you need to know why.
If it is due to compassion for those who have financial problems, that's one thing; if it's due to the squeaky wheel getting the grease, that's something else.

None of us are there; there are too many little details of which we are not aware. You need to find out what's going on, specifically as it relates to others being paid and you not, and then decide what is in your own best interests, and what you are willing to continue to do.

 

[deadhand31]

Ok... now here comes a new tidbit that has my blood boiling just a teensy bit.

As stated earlier, last Friday I opened the school, as my instructor was away. It snowed alot where I live, to the point where it was debated whether or not I kept the school open for the afternoon classes. When my Sabunim called me to see how things were going or if I had received calls, I named an instructor at another branch by his given name.

Today, I get pulled into the office. He tells me that I should use Mr. or posabunim in front the instructor's last name. And, well, I have to say he's right. There's a code of respect he wishes to maintain among all the instructors. Did I goof? Yes.

But here's what he threatened:

If I have a breach of etiquette like that I would have my instructor privileges taken from me.

Yes, no tuition breaks or compensation of any kind for the time I put in there.... but I'd not be allowed to come in and put those hours in.

Even without the previously mentioned situation.... Do I have a right to be pissed?

 

[tellner]

Not so much a right as an obligation :disgust:

 

[Grenadier]

First of all, are you happy at the school? Do you think that it's worth the money that you're paying? If you can honestly answer "yes," then it shouldn't matter what others are paying. It's the value that you are getting that is important.

Second, do you want to be paid by your instructor, or do you need a tuition waiver? If so, then ask him in a polite and respectful manner, and don't bother bringing up the information you received about the other guy.

Are there other circumstances?

Is the other black belt in dire financial straits? That could be the reason why your instructor isn't charging him tuition.

Unfortunately, all you have at this point is a dose of second hand information on this fellow, and if such information were used in your conversation, that could create a rift.

If you want to get it off your chest, then talk to your instructor and see what can be done for you. You could get your tuition waived, maybe compensated for your teaching time at the best. At the very least, you will be no better or no worse off than you are at right now.

 

[gblnking]

Ok... now here comes a new tidbit that has my blood boiling just a teensy bit.

As stated earlier, last Friday I opened the school, as my instructor was away. It snowed alot where I live, to the point where it was debated whether or not I kept the school open for the afternoon classes. When my Sabunim called me to see how things were going or if I had received calls, I named an instructor at another branch by his given name.

Today, I get pulled into the office. He tells me that I should use Mr. or posabunim in front the instructor's last name. And, well, I have to say he's right. There's a code of respect he wishes to maintain among all the instructors. Did I goof? Yes.

But here's what he threatened:

If I have a breach of etiquette like that I would have my instructor privileges taken from me.

Yes, no tuition breaks or compensation of any kind for the time I put in there.... but I'd not be allowed to come in and put those hours in.

Even without the previously mentioned situation.... Do I have a right to be pissed?

One of my fellow students inadvertently over heard a conversation between my teacher and another student. The other student was having some financial difficulties and was going to drop out for a while. Instead my teacher told him not to worry about the next 3 months of dues. Does this make me angry that he cut him a break? Not at all, it makes me happy to know that my teacher is compassionate enough to want to help his students out. Obviously the situations are different. Oh and my teacher doesn’t want to be called “teacher” “sifu” “Mr.” Or anything other than his first name. So as to if you have a right to be pissed off about being dressed down about the etiquette? I don’t know if it’s necessarily right, but I’d be pissed.

 

[Kacey]

If that level of etiquette is appropriate at your school (it is at mine), then yes, you should be reminded of it when you err - as all of us do. Threatening you in that fashion, however, does seem to be a little over the top. Respect should be earned by deserving respect - not by intimidating the trappings of respect out of others.

 

[Brian R. VanCise]

I think you need to address your concerns with your Instructor and see what comes of it. Personally I think you want something and feel you are being slighted. If that is the case then you need to sort that out.

 

[Bodhisattva]

Not sure if this is the place, but here it goes. Please forgive the lengthy background:

I am an assistant instructor at a local TKD school. I have been a regular student for over 7 years, and I have been helping out with instruction for 5 of them. For the past 2 years, I have been running the Saturday kids classes with a fellow student. Despite holding down a job and going to school, I have made a continuous commitment to helping out at the school. None of this is paid, and I continue to pay full tuition.

The school is owned by my sabunim, who comes to the school twice a week. The bulk of the teaching is done by my instructor, who has no say in finances and has also run the school at great personal sacrifice for measly pay.

Last night, I was at an outing with several former students who have moved away, but still stay in close contact with my instructor. During the outing, one of them had mentioned that my instructor had said another student was "on the books." I asked what this meant, and she claimed that he had set hours, and was compensated.

Now, I don't wish to downplay this student's skill. He is an excellent student, and has always displayed a natural talent for the arts. However, I know for a fact that his attendance is nowhere near consistent as mine, and several times he has been gone for weeks at a time. I can also say that I have been willing to give alot more of my time to the school; in the past 5 years I have missed perhaps 2 testings as an assistant. The only person who is at the school more than I am is my instructor.

What I don't know is what to do. Do I mention what was said to my instructor? He has been exploited by my master instructor for longer than I have been in the school. If what was said is true, it's not his doing at all. Do I ask this other student if it's true? If it is, I couldn't blame him, because I would snap up the opportunity in a heartbeat.

I will be at my school in about 50 minutes, and already this has weighed heavily on my mind. Any advice would be appreciated.

I don't know - if the situation was working for you before - why screw it up now?

If someone gets more Kool Aid than you, is it really a problem?

Maybe its time for you to open your own school?

Then again, this could be a great reason and a great time for you to get some MMA / boxing / Clinch / Groundfighting training time in