Hellpppp???

[KickinIt]

Okay so this is my eleventh year in ITF Tae Kwon-Do. I have a severe problem here goes:
I wanted to test for my blackbelt half a year ago but I was in grade 12 and writing diplomas. I was forced to not go for it because of school.
Our class consists of the instructor, two new blackbelts (my dad and his friend), me the blackstripe, three redbelts, 4 bluebelts and one greenbelt.

My instructor has only ever shown me the first ten moves of Chun Moo and that was last April when I first wanted to test. He has only ever shown me the first ten Arnis stick attacks and that was around two years ago! We pull out the matts for self defense about 3 times in the season (3 classes) yet I should know self defense.
Last class we ran over WHITEBELT sparring techniques and the previous class before that we went over the turning kick technique. THE WHOLE CLASS. He rants for endless amounts of time. I have not practiced a flying technique IN THAT CLASS for two years!
For some of you reading you must be thinking that we obviously are not doing it right and that is why he must go over it so much. However that is not the case! I am a WANNABE-CHLOE BRUCE!!! I just thrive to be like that someday!
I am very frustrated. Our intructor is condesending and never has anythign nice to say. When my dad and his friend wanted their blackbelts at first he said no, they weren't ready. They told him they WERE going to test and they were prepared to do whatever it took. That is why they are now blackbelts.

Here is what the requirements for my test are:
10 self defense techniques
10 Arnis stick attacks, 10 defenses, 10 disarms
ALL patterns from whitebelt to blackbelt
ALL one step, two step, three step sparring techniques (27 techniques?)
Sparring one person, two people, and 3 people.
Board breaking.

I am a willing student. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Taekwon-Do. I feel like a caged animal! I'm a student who just wants to learn but is forced to do lower level techniques. I pay for this! I do not feel I should be neglected!
So anyway, I got frustrtated and quit. I am going to a new club now. My father went and talked to our instructor and the instructer said, "well see, that is why I won't give her her blackbelt, she quit. That just proves she isn't ready."
He refers to us as "the women" and "the women are the ones not getting it right" and he constantly puts us down and is condesending.

I mentally prepare myself for every class. To the point where I am telling myself "try hard, even if its whitebelt stuff you still have to try"

What now?!

 

[Bret Hinds]

I had a BB in a Japanese style when i was 18. Ten years latter I wanted to train with my sons there was no dojo around that was of the same style, so We started training in TKD. I asked the instructor what rank I would start with? He said that he would let me wear my BB. After a few lessons I gave a tought to it and I started over as a white belt, I am a fourth dan now in TKD and have a school with two other great people. As Bruce Lee said if you want to drink tea you must empty your cup to taste my tea. Good luck in your new Dojang and empty your cup and have fun learning. As a note our best students are female! All the best in the arts

 

[tellner]

Sounds like leaving was the right decision. I know it seems like you wasted a lot of time. Don't worry. You didn't. If you got some skill you still have that. If you continue in TKD or do something else entirely the experience will still be there, and whatever you do next will come easier.

 

[granfire]

in our organization it's a plus to bring more BBs along, especially if they are as dedicated as you sound and might even end up opening your own place.

This instructor sounds rather unpleasant, no reason to spend your spare time with anybody like that, heaven help us, all to often we have to put up with the likes of him in the work environment.

Cudos for putting school first, before your passion. There are many other instructors out there who would LOVE to have somebody of your dedication to train and promote. Kick on!

 

[terryl965]

All you can do is what is best for you and you alone, best of luck in your training.

 

[Aefibird]

Good luck in your training!

As you love TKD and are dedicated to it then I'm sure your new instructor will soon see that you are an asset to the club because of your passion for training.

Don't worry about your BB test, just concentrate on training hard and being the best you can be, regardless of the colour of your belt.

 

[StuartA]

Sounds like your Ex-Instructor doesnt know:

1. How to instruct very well
2. How to treat people properly

I'm surprised he can maintain a class at all if he's like that. Sounds like you made the right move to get out of there. An instructors job is to 'instruct' and push his students further and whilst the basics are important for all levels, not teaching what is appropriate and needed for a students grade (especially for so long) is just not on.. TBH, I dont get it!

Out of interested, what grade and age is the ex-instructor and how long has he been teaching?

Stuart

 

[Kacey]

First, I think you did the right thing in leaving; it sounds like your instructor has a problem teaching women.

Second, I was in the ITF for years - up to my II Dan. I know that there are some clubs that have set step sparring techniques - but that's not (or isn't when I was there) an ITF requirement. Did he tell you it was? If he did, you make get some surprises at a new club, if they expect you to create your own sets (we always have), or if they do different sets - as the rules for step-sparring set the starting position, number/type of attacks, etc., but not the actual sets.

Third, I have to ask what Arnis has to do with ITF TKD. I was in the ITF for years, and it was all empty-hand techniques; there was some weapons defense taught here and there, but it was extra. I ask this because it makes me wonder about your instructor and what he's been teaching.

 

[Daniel Sullivan]

I am a willing student. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Taekwon-Do. I feel like a caged animal! I'm a student who just wants to learn but is forced to do lower level techniques. I pay for this! I do not feel I should be neglected!
So anyway, I got frustrtated and quit. I am going to a new club now. My father went and talked to our instructor and the instructer said, "well see, that is why I won't give her her blackbelt, she quit. That just proves she isn't ready."
He refers to us as "the women" and "the women are the ones not getting it right" and he constantly puts us down and is condesending.

I mentally prepare myself for every class. To the point where I am telling myself "try hard, even if its whitebelt stuff you still have to try"

What now?!

What now? You dive in and do what you've been doing: learning and training. I sincerly hope that your new club is a better place than the old club, though that doesn't sound like a difficult feat.

Is the new club an ITF club or another org? If another, which one? Just curious.

Best wishes!!

Daniel

 

[jks9199]

Let me take a devil's advocate position here...

Is it possible that your instructor is returning to white belt material and basics, as well as not teaching further advanced forms because you don't have them down properly yet?

My teacher told us how he would go to train with his own teacher, and be puzzled why the same material was being taught again and again... until it dawned on him that maybe it was being repeated because they don't have it right yet. When he acted on that realization by focusing on the material he was being given -- in time, his teacher moved on to newmaterial.

 

[Marginal]

Even then, 11 years training, and he still has her as a high red, and she's doing white belt technique?

How could the basic techniques have slipped by for so long? What was he teaching the past decade?

 

[Cirdan]

Sounds like you made the right choise in changing schools.

BUT there is never anything wrong with training white belt stuff. I would say improving the basics is the most important thing of any MA.

 

[CDKJudoka]

That sounds a lot like Master Higa, here in NY.

You made the right choice. There is no shame in finding an instructor that will instruct you.

 

[jks9199]

Even then, 11 years training, and he still has her as a high red, and she's doing white belt technique?

How could the basic techniques have slipped by for so long? What was he teaching the past decade?

She's 18 or 19, it appears. She could have been in a youth program, where the standards may have been easier.

But I was simply pointing out a possibility. It's equally possible that the guy's just a jerk who's not going to promote a girl, period, from some of the other things in the post. But everyone else was doing a nice job of handling that side; I felt it was reasonable to point out the possibility that the failing wasn't in the teacher.

 

[Marginal]

She's 18 or 19, it appears. She could have been in a youth program, where the standards may have been easier.

There's no reason to have a program that teaches nothing for 10 years. If after that time you find you need to go back to basics with your students, you've utterly failed as an instructor.

 

[KickinIt]

Its just that everyone else is below me, they recieve the attention I never move forward!

I have returned, by the way, and I have decided not to let one man stand in the way of my aspirations!

 

[ATC]

Not sure why everyone is so quick to put down a man and his teachings after only listening to one persons perspective. All that can be said is that you need to do what you think is best for you. Your statements are only here say and nothing more. We do not know this school or instructor and only have your words to go on. I would think that every school has at least one student that is not satisfied, no matter how many think things are great.

We shouldn't be so quick to take one person words as truth without even knowing anything other than those words.

The one thing that I do know is that you are indeed not ready. You yourself state that you only know the first 10 moves of Chun Moo and only the first 10 stick attacks, and other self admissions.

If you are as dedicated as you state then you would have found away to learn the rest of what is needed. Did you ever ask any other black belts in your class for help or assistance in progressing past what was shown to you? Your Dad is a black belt and could have shown you and help you practice at home what you needed to know.

To complain that you do not know what is needed and then complain that you want your black belt seems wrong to me. How much do you practice outside of the dojang?

I have many students that only practice in the dojang during class time. The few that do practice at home and come and ask for help never complain. It is alway the ones that expect to be Bruce Lee or Chloe Bruce but put in no effort other than what they do in dojang.

You need to stop complaining and start practicing. If your instructor only shows you 10 moves then learn those 10 and then show him that you know it and then ask for the rest.

To complain is easy to succeed is hard. Only you can hold you back, no one else.

 

[Brad Dunne]

"Your Dad is a black belt and could have shown you and help you practice at home what you needed to know."

I'm sorry, but the above statement really says it all, doesn't it? With this information, all the complaining in the world does not hold water, regardless of what the instructor is or is not doing. :asian:

 

[granfire]

Not sure why everyone is so quick to put down a man and his teachings after only listening to one persons perspective. All that can be said is that you need to do what you think is best for you. Your statements are only here say and nothing more. We do not know this school or instructor and only have your words to go on. I would think that every school has at least one student that is not satisfied, no matter how many think things are great.

We shouldn't be so quick to take one person words as truth without even knowing anything other than those words.

The one thing that I do know is that you are indeed not ready. You yourself state that you only know the first 10 moves of Chun Moo and only the first 10 stick attacks, and other self admissions.

If you are as dedicated as you state then you would have found away to learn the rest of what is needed. Did you ever ask any other black belts in your class for help or assistance in progressing past what was shown to you? Your Dad is a black belt and could have shown you and help you practice at home what you needed to know.

To complain that you do not know what is needed and then complain that you want your black belt seems wrong to me. How much do you practice outside of the dojang?

I have many students that only practice in the dojang during class time. The few that do practice at home and come and ask for help never complain. It is alway the ones that expect to be Bruce Lee or Chloe Bruce but put in no effort other than what they do in dojang.

You need to stop complaining and start practicing. If your instructor only shows you 10 moves then learn those 10 and then show him that you know it and then ask for the rest.

To complain is easy to succeed is hard. Only you can hold you back, no one else.

Hm, say what?

I don't quiet follow you here. You suggest to learn what needs to be known at home? Then why even pay the instructor?

 

[ATC]

Hm, say what?

I don't quiet follow you here. You suggest to learn what needs to be known at home? Then why even pay the instructor?

Read all of what I said. One day you will understand.

Below are questions that we make all white belts learn and understand:

1. Q: What is a POOR STUDENT?
   A: The POOR STUDENT is lazy and simply expects results without sweat, Sir!
2. Q: What is a GOOD STUDENT?
   A: The GOOD STUDENT has the desire to learn and to achieve goals, Sir!
3. Q: What is an EXCELLENT STUDENT?
   A: The EXCELLENT STUDENT not only learns techniques but gains knowledge of expressive ability, accepts hard work and sweat, realizing results come from practice, Sir!
4. Q: What is the BEST STUDENT?
   A: The BEST STUDENT never gives up trying to learn what he or she needs to learn until it becomes second nature, both in technique and attitude, Sir!

She sounds like a Good Student but it takes much more than that. Just having desire is nowhere enough to be the best.