Fighting to gain respect.

[Steve]

True but beating up relatives is also somewhat extreme, no?

Okay. Have to raise the BS flag here. Tez, aren't you the one who relates fond stories about squaddies getting into fights with each other and with civilians? I recall you even saying you allowed a squaddy to get a punch or two in before yiu arrested him.

There is a clear double standard here. What happened to your "boys will be boys" ideas?

i don't like at all this idea of calling out a relative in public. Lots of unnecessary drama, and while the uncle may have earned his whoopin', situations like that just make everyone look and feel bad.

However, I also disagree with tez3's excuses for similar behavior in the past.

And more than anything, the hypocrisy is killing me. Lots of judging of iron bear going on here. If you're going to jump into the fray, at least make sure you haven't endorsed similar behavior in the past.

 

[Kenpoguy123]

Well people can say stuff about ironbear but have a look at the popular discussions 3 of his threads are on the most popular list. Well he gets people talking at the very least lol

 

[Tez3]

Well people can say stuff about ironbear but have a look at the popular discussions 3 of his threads are on the most popular list. Well he gets people talking at the very least lol

That is not a good thing.

 

[Kenpoguy123]

That is not a good thing.

Yes it was a joke

 

[Tames D]

It's good for MartialTalk.

 

[Tez3]

Yes it was a joke

if you have to explain that...it wasn't a joke.

 

[Spinedoc]

So I got some family visiting for fathers day and my uncle made a very rude comment about me. We have had an ongoing case of bad blood with eachother since I was 13. Contemplating going up to him and socking him in the face, following it up with some more as well.

Maybe that would get me some damn respect, sick of being everyone's damn urinal.

You're looking at this wrong. The fight is not with your Uncle, but rather with yourself. It is only your perception that you need to battle.

You won't win any respect fighting. You can only lose respect. I hope that makes sense. Unless he attacks you physically, you have nothing to gain.

 

[Steve]

if you have to explain that...it wasn't a joke.

so... Much... Irony. Particularly Fun, because it was unexpected.

 

[Kevin__Huang]

You're looking at this wrong. The fight is not with your Uncle, but rather with yourself. It is only your perception that you need to battle.

You won't win any respect fighting. You can only lose respect. I hope that makes sense. Unless he attacks you physically, you have nothing to gain.

Good point. I agree with you [emoji106]

Sent from my D2305 using Tapatalk

 

[Ironbear24]

One question, how would you react if another student at practise said you have a shitty weak punch or kick. What would you do when sparring him just moments later? Show him how wrong he was by punching him or kicking him full force?

Where do you draw the line?

That has happened before, I take it as constructive criticism and don't get angry about it. The students and sifu do things like that to help us get it right.

 

[Kenpoguy123]

That has happened before, I take it as constructive criticism and don't get angry about it. The students and sifu do things like that to help us get it right.

So you get angry when someone says karate sucks but you don't mind when someone says your punch sucks? Can you see why some people have a hard time keeping up with things with you

 

[Ironbear24]

So you get angry when someone says karate sucks but you don't mind when someone says your punch sucks? Can you see why some people have a hard time keeping up with things with you

It's about the intent behind it. For example I have shown video of myself here hitting a punching bag in two separate occasions. Some people said they were weak and I was punching incorrectly. I did not get angry I asked what I could do better, then people told me what I could do better and I practiced that way.

Couple months later I got much better.

 

[JowGaWolf]

anger has no place in a professional fight, no coach wants an undisciplined fighter nor any promoter.

This is why I mentioned professional fighting. He'll either learn how to deal with that anger through training, punching the bag, and fighting without being angry or he'll wash out.
Fighting without anger makes the person a better fighter, so ironbear will have a choice. Either lose the anger or fail at becoming a skilled fighter. At the moment he doesn't have an "either or" decision yet because fighting seem to be the only solution he's looking at and winning is the only outcome.

 

[Tez3]

This is why I mentioned professional fighting. He'll either learn how to deal with that anger through training, punching the bag, and fighting without being angry or he'll wash out.
Fighting without anger makes the person a better fighter, so ironbear will have a choice. Either lose the anger or fail at becoming a skilled fighter. At the moment he doesn't have an "either or" decision yet because fighting seem to be the only solution he's looking at and winning is the only outcome.

To be honest there's enough honest straight forward young up and coming fighters who deserve a fair go that we really don't need someone who is going to be randomly beating people up because they think he's pants.

 

[Ironbear24]

To be honest there's enough honest straight forward young up and coming fighters who deserve a fair go that we really don't need someone who is going to be randomly beating people up because they think he's pants.

But I'm young and upcoming. Many people say I have lots of potential. My attitude can change it is just hard to change it over night.

 

[sgraves]

Don't hit him! Grapple with him and make him say uncle.

I love this idea lol

 

[JowGaWolf]

To be honest there's enough honest straight forward young up and coming fighters who deserve a fair go that we really don't need someone who is going to be randomly beating people up because they think he's pants.

A fair go is a fair go. People either make it on their skills or not. Behavioral issues can be addressed as terms of training.Tyson wasn't a role model when he first started boxing and he did far more than what ironbear has done. It's clear that ironbear wants to be recognized as a good fighter so it only makes sense that he puts himself in the environment that allows him to do that professionally, instead of trying to prove it on the streets. There are a lot of high quality athletes that have stated how sports kept them out of trouble and changed them from being a thug on the street to someone respectful.

The problem now is that ironbear is trying to gain respect from people who really don't matter in the world of fighters. The fights that he won weren't impressive and wouldn't even rank in terms of "street credit." (no offense ironbear). He would better serve himself and his issues by fighting competitively where someone can lay the hurt on him just as easily as he can hurt someone else. All the talk of him needing to be Mature would work it's way out better in the ring than in the streets. That way he can find out what fighting really is and what it really isn't. He'll have role models and mentors that can help him with being "Mature." He won't change until he has a chance to be in the same environment as other fighters so he can see what it's all about and how they deal with similar issues. Right now, ironbear is kind of in his own box trying to figure stuff out on his own which isn't always the best course of action.

 

[Tez3]

Tyson wasn't a role model when he first started boxing

Tyson has never been a role model and isn't the best person to use to demonstrate the benefits of a fight career.
What you are saying is what would happen in an ideal world, the 'bad' boy turned around to become the role model however the stark truth is as I said, there's plenty of up and coming fighters who work hard and push themselves without having any issues to work out. Coaches and promoters who are in the business to hopefully make a living haven't got the time or wherewithal to take on troubled teens. However I know several clubs who would be willing to take one on but they aren't ranked high for pro fighters so it's swings and roundabouts. The big pro gyms don't have time for the troubled, the small amateur clubs do. If Ironbear were in the UK I know exactly who I'd send him to but whether he ended up with a pro fighting career would frankly be debatable because of the reasons I've detailed. Harsh yes but it's similar to the acting, music and writing world, so many are trying to break through.
I would say though that he must get rid of any perceptions by people that he is a brawler or will fight when he loses his temper over nothing. I'd suggest he leaves home and moves somewhere he's not known and can train with a reputable gym and coaches, basically he has to reinvent himself. What that means in the way of help for his anger, self esteem problems etc I can't tell, hopefully though a fresh start somewhere away from everything can help.

 

[sgraves]

I understand what you are going through cause I went through kinda the same thing when I first starting training I had people going your to big to do this this and that or oh you cant do that oh you cant do this but being a young hot had I got pissed out and show boated and I actually had a a situation where a guy said I could kick I kicked a dude so hard he literally flipped and I kicked another guy so hard he limped for like three months im not telling you these things to brag Im telling you these things to high light how stupid they were and how naïve and immature I was to let peoples words get to me people can really say what they want its part of the trails of becoming a true martial artist and as you grow in martial arts age you will see how peoples words don't effect you as much being martial fighter when somebody say you cant do this you cant do that it might feel like a challenge and that spirit inside of you naturally wants to do battle with a jerk who is calling you out but maturity in the martial arts is knowing somebody jerk calling you out it just someone trying to a tough guy or just wants a show and just isn't worth and also knowing that martial arts is meant to protect yourself your loved ones and what ever else now tournaments mma fights competition those all places where we can hang out and cut loose and have fun you know but outside those events you don't have to prove anything to anybody no matter how much they taunt get press buttons most of the time that comes out of jealousy them being uncomfortable with themselves or whatever the case maybe those type of people need to be ignored I had to learn the lessons the hard way and sometimes it does get really really hard but the stronger you get mentally and the more you grow into yourself as a martial artist and you know certain things in the end you will look back and realize a lot mainly that you are glad you didn't fall into people trap and that you are wayyy better then that

 

[Tez3]

I understand what you are going through cause I went through kinda the same thing when I first starting training I had people going your to big to do this this and that or oh you cant do that oh you cant do this but being a young hot had I got pissed out and show boated and I actually had a a situation where a guy said I could kick I kicked a dude so hard he literally flipped and I kicked another guy so hard he limped for like three months im not telling you these things to brag Im telling you these things to high light how stupid they were and how naïve and immature I was to let peoples words get to me people can really say what they want its part of the trails of becoming a true martial artist and as you grow in martial arts age you will see how peoples words don't effect you as much being martial fighter when somebody say you cant do this you cant do that it might feel like a challenge and that spirit inside of you naturally wants to do battle with a jerk who is calling you out but maturity in the martial arts is knowing somebody jerk calling you out it just someone trying to a tough guy or just wants a show and just isn't worth and also knowing that martial arts is meant to protect yourself your loved ones and what ever else now tournaments mma fights competition those all places where we can hang out and cut loose and have fun you know but outside those events you don't have to prove anything to anybody no matter how much they taunt get press buttons most of the time that comes out of jealousy them being uncomfortable with themselves or whatever the case maybe those type of people need to be ignored I had to learn the lessons the hard way and sometimes it does get really really hard but the stronger you get mentally and the more you grow into yourself as a martial artist and you know certain things in the end you will look back and realize a lot mainly that you are glad you didn't fall into people trap and that you are wayyy better then that

I know this is good heartfelt advice but please could you use punctuation? I got out of breath reading it! it is rather good as one sentence though.