Do you need to hate your attacker?

[Joab]

One teacher in my past emphasized hating your attacker. Now to be fair, he was referring to somebody out on the streets who has attacked you without provocation who is trying to kill or rape you or both, a very serious situation to be sure. "You've got to hate!" he would say why we were doing our drills. This caused much tension and a feeling of being uncomfortable, even out and out anxiety on my part, and I do suffer from an anxiety, disorder, as I am a Christian, and it is clearly against the teachings of Jesus to hate anybody, even your enemy, in fact your supposed to love everyone, including your enemy. Is it necessary to hate your attacker, or can you merely be determined to stop the attack by any means necessary, running if at all possible without hating your attacker? Does hatred actually give you the edge you need to survive, or is this teacher something of a radical in his philosophy? (Well, I think he is something of a radical, but that's an aside) All opinions appreciated.

 

[Empty Hands]

It can be helpful, but it can also make you stupid. I think that more times than not, determination and a cool head will do you more good.

 

[terryl965]

It can be helpful, but it can also make you stupid. I think that more times than not, determination and a cool head will do you more good.

I would have to agree with you.

 

[Omar B]

Emotions cloud the mind. Don't hate, act.

 

[elder999]

IF you're attacked, there'll be enough in the way of "feelings" going on, like fear, for you to use-and learn to use. Manufactured ones-like "hate"-are not only irrelevant, but completely unnecessary.

 

[MA-Caver]

One teacher in my past emphasized hating your attacker. Now to be fair, he was referring to somebody out on the streets who has attacked you without provocation who is trying to kill or rape you or both, a very serious situation to be sure. "You've got to hate!" he would say why we were doing our drills. This caused much tension and a feeling of being uncomfortable, even out and out anxiety on my part, and I do suffer from an anxiety, disorder, as I am a Christian, and it is clearly against the teachings of Jesus to hate anybody, even your enemy, in fact your supposed to love everyone, including your enemy. Is it necessary to hate your attacker, or can you merely be determined to stop the attack by any means necessary, running if at all possible without hating your attacker? Does hatred actually give you the edge you need to survive, or is this teacher something of a radical in his philosophy? (Well, I think he is something of a radical, but that's an aside) All opinions appreciated.

He is something of a radical but what he says does make sense. Problem is hate is not like Anger which really should be the motivating fuel to fend off attacks. Hatred usually happens after the fact and not during. You can be angry with someone for something they're doing (or trying to) right at that moment but to instantly bring up hatred is something else entirely. You can already hate something before it happens but the end result is still anger. Hatred and anger are two separate emotions but they're symbiotic of each other. You can hate a person after they've done or tried to do wrong by you... but IMO it's non-productive. Hatred can lead to all sorts of things. Racial prejudice and so on.
As far as hating the attacker after the fact (successful or not) well that's up to you of course. I would prefer to hate the act and pity the actor. I understand Christ's last words of "forgive them for they know NOT what they do"...
Oh sure they know what they're doing but they don't understand the consequences of their actions and more n likely not given them much thought...
Please understand that if I were attacked the guy would be in a world of hurt or dead (if necessary) but I would still feel sorry for them that they had to stoop to barbarism to obtain whatever it was that they wanted or thought they needed. My pity would not be IN the moment but afterwards.
I'm a supporter of the death penalty and severe jail time for heinous crimes but I realize that many criminals, not all are trying to survive themselves... particularly robbers who just want your money, watch, etc.
As for rapists/molesters/sexual predators however; my pity is almost non-existent... unless they truly desire help and desire to stop their compulsion, which is possible as I've seen during my experiences as an intern.
Hate? "It takes too much energy to hate". Hatred is for the weak, the ignorant, the barbarians of this world.
Get angry because it doesn't last... hatred can stretch out your whole life and destroy you as a decent human being from within.

 

[chinto]

no, just dispatch the attacker as quickly and disputatiously as you can. no emotion needed, just get the job done efficiently and quickly.

 

[seasoned]

It can be helpful, but it can also make you stupid. I think that more times than not, determination and a cool head will do you more good.

Excellent point. Emotions have no boundaries. If you let one out of the box, then you make room for others.

 

[exile]

In a critical situation, what you need most of all is a way to mobilize your will—your unconquerable determination to force the outcome to your advantage. Can anger do that? Up to a point, I think it can. I've done some of my best work in a fury of cold anger, which gave me the energy to sift through plausible-seeming stupidity and find its vulnerable points. And it's also true that someone in a physical confrontation, radiating white-hot hatred toward the attacker, will likely present a genuinely fearsome appearance that can stop the attacker in his tracks. I've been in that situation a few times in the past, and, with an intimidating weapon in my hand, it does tend to damp down a purely opportunistic attacker's game plan most marvelously.

But that said, there is the greater danger that you'll lose your way, your ability to think things through to the end, which is absolutely critical when your life is on the line. In the end, the cold clear mobilization of will without the distraction of violent emotion is probably going to give you better odds than a berserker fury. Berserkers were incredibly formidable enemies, but from what little we have in the way of records, there's reason to think that many of them died of their wounds after the battle, eh?

And if you hate you attacker enough, and have brought him to the ground, there's an excellent chance that you may damage him further in a way that will get you into way more trouble with law than you'd ever bargained on. Why give him even that kind of victory? The temptation to kick the face in of someone you hate is much greater than it is when it's someone you merely need to dispose of cleanly and move on—and so are the legal and long-term personal costs.

 

[Bill Mattocks]

This caused much tension and a feeling of being uncomfortable, even out and out anxiety on my part, and I do suffer from an anxiety, disorder, as I am a Christian, and it is clearly against the teachings of Jesus to hate anybody, even your enemy, in fact your supposed to love everyone, including your enemy.

Since you put it in these terms, let me try this with you.

God hates. Yes, God is love, but God hate sin, God hates evil. Isn't that right?

I had to ask my own priest, when I was growing up - how could God 'hate' anything, when God is love and God loves everyone?

That's when I learned about different kinds of hate. There are different kinds of love, right? Agape, Eros, Philia. Well, there are different kinds of hate too. God doesn't 'hate' sin like I hate broccoli, or like a seething anger that one person might feel for another - God hates sin like it is completely alien to Him, it must never be near Him, He will not permit it. When God 'hates', He is rejecting.

So if you 'hate' your attacker, you're rejecting him. He is all that you stand against, the opposite of decent the opposite of righteous, the opposite of good. He must be fought, he must be rejected, he must be defeated. It's not a deep seething personal dislike, it is a necessity, an expelling, even an exorcism of sorts - this must end now! Hate your attacker like God hates sin.

Well, just a thought, anyway. Your remark about not 'hating' as a Christian reminded me of questions I had long ago - which the answer made sense to me, so perhaps it will to you too.

 

[Aikicomp]

Hate your attacker? Never. As others have said it clouds the mind and may become an asset for your attacker. However, you do need to stop them from hurting you.

No anger, no hatred.....just focused intensity of technique allowing you to do what you were trained to do and hate will hinder this greatly. Fear may enter your mind, but, if used and focused properly it can become a great asset and companion.

As for being Christian and defending yourself, there IS no conflict, evil must be confronted, rejected and defeated to the best of our ability.

Bill, you put it very well.

When I was talking to our Bishop one time and this came up in conversation his response was " Your attacker does not love you, he is trying to hurt you and you by virtue of being Christian can not and should not let evil prevail, it must always be fought... spiritually, mentally and sometimes unfortunately physically."


Michael

 

[Omar B]

To quote The Dragon himself "Emotional content, not anger."

 

[sgtmac_46]

One teacher in my past emphasized hating your attacker. Now to be fair, he was referring to somebody out on the streets who has attacked you without provocation who is trying to kill or rape you or both, a very serious situation to be sure. "You've got to hate!" he would say why we were doing our drills. This caused much tension and a feeling of being uncomfortable, even out and out anxiety on my part, and I do suffer from an anxiety, disorder, as I am a Christian, and it is clearly against the teachings of Jesus to hate anybody, even your enemy, in fact your supposed to love everyone, including your enemy. Is it necessary to hate your attacker, or can you merely be determined to stop the attack by any means necessary, running if at all possible without hating your attacker? Does hatred actually give you the edge you need to survive, or is this teacher something of a radical in his philosophy? (Well, I think he is something of a radical, but that's an aside) All opinions appreciated.

Honestly, I don't think you really have enough time in an attack for such a conscious concept as 'hate'.......anger is a different story, so long as it's cold anger. Disregard for their well-being is probably a better state of mind.

The ideal mindset is one of cold deliberation coupled with extreme malice.

 

[ErickUngarelli]

Dear Joab,

Personally, I believe it is pointless to hate your opponent.
Actually it is pointless and kinda useless to hate anyone, it just blurs your mind.

I leave the words of Col. Mikhail Ryabko:

See you soon.

Sincerely,

Erick Ungarelli

 

[teekin]

Honestly, I don't think you really have enough time in an attack for such a conscious concept as 'hate'.......anger is a different story, so long as it's cold anger. Disregard for their well-being is probably a better state of mind.

The ideal mindset is one of cold deliberate logic coupled with extreme malice.

This sounds like the mindset that the SF guys have when they are out on a mission. Everyone stays chilly. There is no emotion, no hate, no anger, that will just cloud the mind, slow you down. You don't know this person, the attack is not personal; dispose of the threat as quick and ruthlessly as possible and move on. Why waste time and energy on anger or hate? What's the point?
lori

 

[sgtmac_46]

Honestly, I don't think you really have enough time in an attack for such a conscious concept as 'hate'.......anger is a different story, so long as it's cold anger. Disregard for their well-being is probably a better state of mind.

The ideal mindset is one of cold deliberate logic coupled with extreme malice.

This sounds like the mindset that the SF guys have when they are out on a mission. Everyone stays chilly. There is no emotion, no hate, no anger, that will just cloud the mind, slow you down. You don't know this person, the attack is not personal; dispose of the threat as quick and ruthlessly as possible and move on. Why waste time and energy on anger or hate? What's the point?
lori

Speed, Surprise and Violence of Action.....

 

[Andy Moynihan]

No.

You need not to "hate" or "fear" you need to not even CARE.

Your own body will tell you when it's "go time" by giving you the signals of the "dump" that keeps getting mistaken as fear, but all it is is shifting gears to make ready.

This person is not an "object of hate" or a "scary, intimidatiing guy" he is Just Another Job.

 

[searcher]

Hate your attacker if you want, but make sure you can shut it off once the threat has been stopped. If you can't shut it off, you can get yourself in some deep legal trouble(if you keep going after them and they are no longer a threat).


With all the hate we have in the world, do we really need to be making more?

 

[Aiki Lee]

Instead of hating, I try to come from a place of righteous anger. Just try to make the situation feel real. If you are attacked on the street it may not be that you hate the guy, but are rather offended by him. Use that and things flow better, at least for me they do.

 

[MJS]

One teacher in my past emphasized hating your attacker. Now to be fair, he was referring to somebody out on the streets who has attacked you without provocation who is trying to kill or rape you or both, a very serious situation to be sure. "You've got to hate!" he would say why we were doing our drills. This caused much tension and a feeling of being uncomfortable, even out and out anxiety on my part, and I do suffer from an anxiety, disorder, as I am a Christian, and it is clearly against the teachings of Jesus to hate anybody, even your enemy, in fact your supposed to love everyone, including your enemy. Is it necessary to hate your attacker, or can you merely be determined to stop the attack by any means necessary, running if at all possible without hating your attacker? Does hatred actually give you the edge you need to survive, or is this teacher something of a radical in his philosophy? (Well, I think he is something of a radical, but that's an aside) All opinions appreciated.

I'll start my post by saying this....while I am not anti God, (I was raised in a Catholic household) I don't like to bring religion of any kind into a martial arts debate. That being said...IMO, if someone were to attack you, and this can range from a heated verbal exchange to an actual physical confrontation, they obviously have no remorse or respect for you, therefore, I certainly am not going to have any for them.

I think it would be more anger, as it was said by a few others, instead of hate. Sure, hate may play a part, but I would say primarily anger...anger for what this person is attempting to do to me.