Did I pass up something good? Or was it a charlatan?

[JowGaWolf]

It's a tough situation to be in, especially if what you say is true that they did indeed surround you and press-gang you into the fight. I probably would have done the same in your shoes as the chances of me getting beat up by a single person in a ring is a lot less than being beat up by 4-5 people surrounding me.

You have to keep in mind that he was in a gym and not on the streets. Being surrounded in a gym is not the same as being surrounded in the streets. If they really wanted to test Ironbear's skills then they could have skipped all of the intimidation crap and simply asked him if he wanted to engage in a friendly sparring match instead of calling someone out. If they were going to do something stupid then the ring isn't going to stop them from doing it.

By entering the ring he is agreeing to engage in combat with the the person in the ring. For me personally one of my first thoughts when I read the situation was that Ironbear was being sized up and that now they have an idea of how hard he can hit along with his capabilities.

I think they would have let Ironbear alone had he not let them hype his head up. I think things would have gone differently had he only responded in a way that would suggest that he's not as good as he appears to be. It wouldn't hurt Ironbear's reputation or ability if these guys walked away thinking that he couldn't fight.

This is how I am as a person. If someone really wants to spar with me then the best way to get me to spar is to ask for a friendly sparring match and not call me names or taunt me. I will instantly assume that a person is up to no good if they feel the need to pressure me and call me names just so I can spar with them. Saying that I'm a wuss or afraid is a deal breaker for me. It may be arrogant of me, but in my mind sparring with me is a privilege for the other person and it's an equal privilege for me to spar with someone else. Sparring is something done with great respect between the 2 fighter so calling me a wuss is just not a good start.

Now to a very important question, will you tell your sifu what happend?

Hopefully he'll have enough brains to not tell his Sifu and make it a personal goal not to fight outside of the school, or martial arts competitions where he represents his school. The fact that he sparred is not the issue that's going to make his Sifu angry. It's why he agreed to sparring which will make his Sifu angry and possibly toss him out.

 

[Chris Parker]

I'm not going back through your OP, because it's simply going to take too long… so, a few snippets that leapt out at me.

I'm going to avoid situations like that by not going to that gym anymore. I tried the walking away part and it didn't work well.

That's not going to work, though. You can't avoid a situation you've already been in by avoiding a location… you may avoid an exact repeat, but the issue isn't where you are, it's what happens where you are… and much of that comes back to you.

Hindsight is 20/20. You're right.

You don't need hindsight, you need presence of mind in the moment. You are sadly lacking pretty much completely in that regard.

I was in the right to walk away from it. I got all I needed from the thread so I think you for answering my question.

You didn't walk away. You engaged in a fight. Again.

I tried walking away but they didn't let me leave and stood in my way. I was pretty much circled by this group of people and I said alright, I'll do it.

We got into the gyms boxing ring and honestly, I was nervous. I had no idea who this person was or what his level of experience was. Then when it started it was clear he been doing something. The guy kicked me in the damn shin and that hurt.

So I figured ok this guy is hitting hard, I'm going to do that too. After some body kicks and some punches the guy called it quits. He walked out of the ring and so did I. I took off the gear and the guy from before said I had talent and he wanted to get me into fighting. That I could make money and to get started.

"I said alright, I'll do it… We got into the gyms boxing ring… So I figured ok this guy is hitting hard, I'm going to do that too…"

You didn't walk away. You engaged in a fight. Again.

So, have you now quit going to your martial arts class? Wasn't it you that told your sifu that you wouldn't get in sparring matches at the gym anymore if he allowed you to continue training with him?

This didn't happen on purpose.

Doesn't matter if it "didn't happen on purpose". It happened. You let it happen. Again. After you promised not to.

Look, I know you'll come back with "it wasn't my fault, they forced me, I tried walking away…" but bluntly, none of that matters. You constantly get into these situations, and, once more, you let yourself be led by your emotions, and quickly gave up trying to talk your way out to once more do exactly what your instructor told you not to. Then, you did possibly the most stupid thing you could have done… you came here to talk about it.

Think about it.

Your previous stories from this site have gotten back to your instructor. Someone here contacted your instructor about them. Your instructor was displeased (to put it mildly). He told you not to engage in fights or "sparring matches" outside the dojo again. You then get into yet another situation, and come here to talk about it… the place where you have someone who has previously reported back to your instructor about you… who likely has followed your story, and knows of your promise… and how it's now been broken (again).

What makes you think that this won't also be reported back? And what do you think your instructor will think if he hears that you've broken your promise to him, after the lesson he gave you last time?

In the end, the issue is still you. You are emotionally led, hot-tempered, and have a real lack of ability to take responsibility for your actions. Frankly, I still think you should take at least some time off from martial arts entirely… you don't seem to be suited to it at this time in your life.

 

[Tez3]

Your previous stories from this site have gotten back to your instructor. Someone here contacted your instructor about them

I wouldn't be surprised if the instructor has actually read them now after being told about them. You don't have to be a member to read them, something to remember when applying for jobs etc btw.

 

[Ironbear24]

The last one was my uncle who called him on the phone and basically gave him a sob story. He didn't read it on here.

 

[JowGaWolf]

I wouldn't be surprised if the instructor has actually read them now after being told about them. You don't have to be a member to read them, something to remember when applying for jobs etc btw.

lol. oooooops. I guess I need to go back to all my posts and reply.... just joking. lol. Like they say. If you don't want someone to know, then don't put it on the Internet.

 

[Chris Parker]

The last one was my uncle who called him on the phone and basically gave him a sob story. He didn't read it on here.

Do your stories ever stay the same?

Sifu is pissed off.

So apparently an anonymous caller told him about how I "beat up a middle aged man who is out of shape"…

 

[Kickboxer101]

You have to keep in mind that he was in a gym and not on the streets. Being surrounded in a gym is not the same as being surrounded in the streets. If they really wanted to test Ironbear's skills then they could have skipped all of the intimidation crap and simply asked him if he wanted to engage in a friendly sparring match instead of calling someone out. If they were going to do something stupid then the ring isn't going to stop them from doing it.

By entering the ring he is agreeing to engage in combat with the the person in the ring. For me personally one of my first thoughts when I read the situation was that Ironbear was being sized up and that now they have an idea of how hard he can hit along with his capabilities.

I think they would have let Ironbear alone had he not let them hype his head up. I think things would have gone differently had he only responded in a way that would suggest that he's not as good as he appears to be. It wouldn't hurt Ironbear's reputation or ability if these guys walked away thinking that he couldn't fight.

This is how I am as a person. If someone really wants to spar with me then the best way to get me to spar is to ask for a friendly sparring match and not call me names or taunt me. I will instantly assume that a person is up to no good if they feel the need to pressure me and call me names just so I can spar with them. Saying that I'm a wuss or afraid is a deal breaker for me. It may be arrogant of me, but in my mind sparring with me is a privilege for the other person and it's an equal privilege for me to spar with someone else. Sparring is something done with great respect between the 2 fighter so calling me a wuss is just not a good start.

Hopefully he'll have enough brains to not tell his Sifu and make it a personal goal not to fight outside of the school, or martial arts competitions where he represents his school. The fact that he sparred is not the issue that's going to make his Sifu angry. It's why he agreed to sparring which will make his Sifu angry and possibly toss him out.

I agree with you on sparring I'd never spar with someone I don't know outside a controlled environment of my school or any official fight gym. It's far to risky on every level. So many things could go wrong the guy could do serious damage to you or you could do serious damage to them and that gets you in more trouble. I've had random people asking to spar with me since some people know me from my fighting in the ring but I just always say you want to turn up at gym and do a class and then if it works out then maybe we will. The only one time I've sparred outside my gym is in a friends back garden with a friend I've known since I was 5 I'd never do that with a guy I don't know

 

[Kickboxer101]

Do your stories ever stay the same?

Sifu is pissed off.

Exactly what I've been saying I've been trying to be nice here but I'm starting to call bs on all this

 

[Tez3]

The last one was my uncle who called him on the phone and basically gave him a sob story. He didn't read it on here.

Mm, ok, whatever. However MT is one of the biggest martial arts sites around with international posters as well as American ones. It would be very easy for any martial arts students who trains with you to recognise who you are and point it out to your instructor. That goes for any place you train in the future.

 

[Ironbear24]

Do your stories ever stay the same?

Sifu is pissed off.

At the time yeah, thats what I thought and that's what my sifu told me. An anonymous phone call, I always had my hunch it was my uncle as did many other posters here.

It's a matter of process of elimination, who else would care that much to call and tell him about it?

 

[Gerry Seymour]

This didn't happen on purpose.

You stepped into the ring. That was, in fact, your choice. If you try to walk out and they physically restrain you, then you can act. Until then, there's really nothing putting you in a position where you have to fight.

I'm not saying it would be easy. I'm not even saying it would work. What I am saying is that you gave your word to NOT do something, and then you did that thing before you exhausted the alternatives.

 

[Ironbear24]

You stepped into the ring. That was, in fact, your choice. If you try to walk out and they physically restrain you, then you can act. Until then, there's really nothing putting you in a position where you have to fight.

I'm not saying it would be easy. I'm not even saying it would work. What I am saying is that you gave your word to NOT do something, and then you did that thing before you exhausted the alternatives.

I acted out of fear. I didn't want to be physically restrained by 8 people and possibly beat up. I didn't want them to escalate it to that.

 

[Kickboxer101]

I acted out of fear. I didn't want to be physically restrained by 8 people and possibly beat up. I didn't want them to escalate it to that.

And do you think you beating up their buddy wouldve made them happy ajd said okay cool on your way

 

[Gerry Seymour]

I acted out of fear. I didn't want to be physically restrained by 8 people and possibly beat up. I didn't want them to escalate it to that.

So, what did you try? I've been known to simply tell people I suck at fighting. That usually reduces their motivation. If you'd said, "Yeah, I can hit hard, but only if it stands still like that. I'm crap in the ring," they would probably have backed off. Hard to call someone a pussy if they call themselves first.

You could also have agreed to the bout, then simply walked to another part of the gym where other people were. Or hauled *** out of there. Or proposed something alternate that would stall them. Yeah, they'd think you're a coward, but you'd know you were just doing what was right to avoid the need to fight.

Again, I'm not saying there's anything easy about it.

 

[Dirty Dog]

I acted out of fear. I didn't want to be physically restrained by 8 people and possibly beat up. I didn't want them to escalate it to that.

You really put a lot of effort into trying to justify your douchebaggy behavior.
Maybe if you stopped, there might be a chance you'd grow up and stop the behavior instead.

 

[Kickboxer101]

You know I think I've realised why I'm starting to not believe your stories. They all sound like they come out of a movie. A random guy starting a fight with you at a party you fighting to defend your honour in a gym, getting stabbed for standing up to a gang member, fighting the horrible abisive uncle and putting him in his place, your sifu teaching you right from wrong with a sparring match which you get dominated in and now a sleazy fight promoter forced you into the ring because you had no choice. There's probably about 100 martial art movies with those plots in them

 

[Tez3]

You know I think I've realised why I'm starting to not believe your stories. They all sound like they come out of a movie. A random guy starting a fight with you at a party you fighting to defend your honour in a gym, getting stabbed for standing up to a gang member, fighting the horrible abisive uncle and putting him in his place, your sifu teaching you right from wrong with a sparring match which you get dominated in and now a sleazy fight promoter forced you into the ring because you had no choice. There's probably about 100 martial art movies with those plots in them

Perhaps we are being used as market research/sounding board for a non martial artist writer who is penning his magnum opus?

 

[Ironbear24]

You know I think I've realised why I'm starting to not believe your stories. They all sound like they come out of a movie. A random guy starting a fight with you at a party you fighting to defend your honour in a gym, getting stabbed for standing up to a gang member, fighting the horrible abisive uncle and putting him in his place, your sifu teaching you right from wrong with a sparring match which you get dominated in and now a sleazy fight promoter forced you into the ring because you had no choice. There's probably about 100 martial art movies with those plots in them

Where is my montage scene and girl at the end?

 

[Kickboxer101]

Where is my montage scene and girl at the end?

You tell me you're the one writing the stories

 

[Ironbear24]

You tell me you're the one writing the stories

The pen is called life. Like I said before, if people don't believe me that's fine, it is impossible to back any of these events without video or a third party to verify them.

In reality though, what would I gain? None of this makes me look cool, none of this makes me look tough or impresses anybody. All it has done is get the majority of the forum to not like me and act rude toward me. If I were to make up stories to tell here wouldn't you think I'd pick more suited ones for the forum?