Conflict in the Streets

[Cryozombie]

I'd like to share a story about a confrontation that happened to me.

Myself and a friend were walking downtown chicago on our way to a club. We were with a couple of girls, and pretty much minding our own buisness. Now, I admit that we dress, uh, well, for lack of an easy way to describe it, Punk-ish. My friend has a shaven head. He also had a German flag pacth on the back of his bomber jacket. I think that is what started the confrontation.

A guy, who, from his actions and appearance I will refer to as "The crack head" because it was obvious to me he was on somthing, approched my friend. He yelled something at him about not liking his "Tribe" and wanted to know what my friend was going to do about it. We kept walking but he started following us. My friend stopped and turned on this guy who, at this time was between mumbling to himself and yelling at my friend about being a racist, and said somthing to the effect of "Hey man, I have no problem with you". The guy mutterd somthing I did not hear and stepped tword my friend. My friend stepped back and pointed to the unity patch on his coat and said "Look at this man... I am not racist." The Girl my friend was with had kept walking, but the one I was with had stopped. I turned to her and said "KEEP WALKING."
The guy noticed me at that point and turned on me, and said "You want to teach me somthing? You gotta tribe?" or somthing like that... At that point I stepped forward tword him, raised my hands and told him "Back off, you dont want to do this" pretty forcefully. He stopped, mumbled somthing and turned and walked away from us.

Ive been thinking about this...and how the situation went, and what we could have done differently... I think my friend stopping was probably our first mistake, but then again, this guy was following us... Was it worth the risk confronting this guy, or would we have been better off to keep moving and hope he lost interest? Secondly, i think I screwed up by stepping tword the guy. It was my intention (and apparently it worked) to invade his "space" and intimidate him... If it had not made him walk away, he would have been in a much better place to attack me...

Third, and most important in my mind... I realize after the guy turned on me, my total attention was focused on this guy. If he had had friends, I would have been in a lot of trouble.

Anyhow... thats my encounter and my thoughts surrounding it.

 

[Ceicei]

Ummm. That kind of person usually is seeking some sort of attention, even if it may result in an altercation.

Had you continued on and ignored him, its possible that he would escalate and demand to be heard--that may mean he might go further than a verbal controntation.

In that situation, anything could have changed so quickly and it couldn't always be predictable if the guy was indeed hopped on something.

Nevertheless, your challenge to him did end the whole thing. For what its worth, it came up good.

Chalk it up to a learning experience. Sometimes over-analyzing a situation and "what ifs" may not provide much of a solution as the next time it happens, it will never be in an identical way. Nevertheless, consider how it started and how it was handled and if you could go "back in time" to do it again, would you have done it any differently? Perhaps not.

- Ceicei

 

[KennethKu]

Give him the King's response, " Can we all just get along?"

 

[Touch Of Death]

Let me put this delicatly. The attire you both chose to wear was meant to get a response, and that is exactly what you got. I used to run around in a Samhain T-Shirt myself, and when people see three men covered in blood on your shirt, it gets a negative response. My one and only bar fight happened because my freind got himself smacked upside his head for wearing an "I want your Skull" Jacket. I know its a little far fetched to ask you to not wear "punkish" clothes; so, I won't. But for God's sake, don't be suprised when a "crack head" reacts.
Sean

 

[Rich Parsons]

Yo Techno,

Man I hate the dweebs out there that do not know the 411 with the skin. It was the Neo's that took the shaving of heads and made it a bad scene.

As to the reaction you made. First, I agree with having the women continue, as long as the path is clear. Now did she hesitate? Was your position between her and the bad guy? You may have reacted instinctively and not known it.

Did you check for friends of the bad guy? And Not see any? Sometimes, a person may put themselves in a position to allow others a better chance to either escape or to position themselves for the altercation at hand. This may not be the safest position for that person yet, it is the best situation for the group.


Yes, your clothes may gather attention, and yes you may not want negative attention from others and looking for the wow, cool threads dude. So, you will have to decide if your clothes or places you frequent or the people you hang around give you too much of a problem or not.


Two last thoughts.
I love Chicago
I have a simple rule for me. If you survive, and no one got hurt then you won. Yet every situation has something to offer to you to learn from.

Best Regards
:asian:

 

[Cryozombie]

Originally posted by Touch'O'Death
Let me put this delicatly. The attire you both chose to wear was meant to get a response, and that is exactly what you got.
Sean

You know, its funny, because I hear this alot. And I realize that some people will feel the need to "respond" and that is just how it is. I accept that the way I dress, or do my hair, or whatever will make me stand out in a lot of places, BUT...

No one ever stops to think... I wear that stuff, not becuase I want people to "react" to me, I wear it because to the group of people I hang out with, the places we go, and the people I am around its the "norm". The "norm" is outta place there.

I dont get up in the morning, and go "lets see how much attention I am going to get" and get all Punked up. If I am going to the mall, or the grocery store... Im just a jeans and tshirt kinda guy... But that night, we were going to an Industrial Club, we would have been more OUT of place in say, jeans and Hillfiger than in leather and spikes...

Its like saying someone on their way to a wedding in a Tux is looking for attention because its abnormal to wear a Tux in public.

But, I do acknowlage that the incident occured because of our dress.

 

[vincefuess]

When I was in college, I was proud headbanger (mid-80's timeframe, long hair, sleeveless concert shirts, spiked wristbands, etc). I soon discovered when I went out into the "real world" and looked for a job, this appearance really worked against me- as wrong as it may be to judge a book by it's cover. I got a haircut and put on a polo shirt. Turned out to be not a big deal. In fact, I got a good job.

Well since then, Father Time has done his own makeover on me, like it or not. Not be be beaten by Father Time's sense of hairstyle, I recently shaved off what had not already fallen out. I have been quite shocked at what kind of reaction this has brought me in strangers on the street. It is automatically assumed I am a racist skinhead, thanks to the shame that counterculture has wrought upon us. I can't help the fact that being a big, bald-headed white guy intimidates many people. I disarm this with a big smile, but it still happens.

It sounds liek you did the right thing, but you also have to know that people DO react to appearance.

 

[dearnis.com]

A thought.....
I always make certain that the people I am with know what to do and where to go in the event that something goes wrong. The last thing you need in a bad situation is the girl you are with getting in the way, hanging on you, or worse, and when things go down it is the wrong time to explain the facts of life.
And yes, some women will have an issue with this; my ex never could get the concept of not walking on the same side as my weapon.

Chad

 

[Rich Parsons]

Originally posted by dearnis.com
A thought.....
I always make certain that the people I am with know what to do and where to go in the event that something goes wrong. The last thing you need in a bad situation is the girl you are with getting in the way, hanging on you, or worse, and when things go down it is the wrong time to explain the facts of life.
And yes, some women will have an issue with this; my ex never could get the concept of not walking on the same side as my weapon.

Chad

Chad,

This is sooooooo TRUE! I know from personal expereince as well, and respect these comments.

Thanks
:asian: