coed dorm... rooms?

[tellner]

A couple of the cases here actually make sense.

An out gay guy who rooms with straight guys had better have very mature room-mates. I've seen it get ugly. I've also seen the gay boy end up doing all the cleaning. There's a grain of truth to some stereotypes.

If he can find a gay room-mate that can work well enough. But there are some of the same issues of straight boys and straight girls rooming together. Seen that one, too.

Gay guy, straight gal? Some of the issues go away. And there's a better chance that he'll be fit to live with and not drive her off men for the rest of her life

Lesbian sharing a dorm room with a straight guy? Bad, bad news.

I have to disagree! The best way to stop teenagers having sex, drugs and rock&roll is to make them live in the same room! The girls really will not want to have much to do with the lads after living with them trust me.

Oh Lord have you nailed it.

There's no better romance killer than actually being around the opposite sex 24/7. Fifty years ago it was co-ed dorms. Thirty years ago it was co-ed floors in the same dorm. It was all supposed to be, as Erma Bombeck (ztl) said at the time "a supermarket of sensuality" but turned into celibacy the first time the boys saw nylons hanging over the shower head.

Seeing how boys actually live is probably responsible for the majority of college-age lesbianism

Loud. Unhygenic. Three week old beer cans on the floor. Underwear that moves around under its own power and is demanding the vote. More testosterone than myelin. Sports mad. And if a bunch of them get together it's even money that there will be property damage.

Girls start looking pretty good.

And doing versa vice instead of vice versa...

Clothes obsession. Gossip. More gossip. Vicious, predatory clinically precise gossip. Girls whose only model for dealing with a man is their mother. The bathroom is clean, but it's never empty. And if they live in close proximity and all entrain? You'll have to move out of the dorm for a week. It's worth your life to be male and breathing.

Beer and porn make a lot of sense.

they are more mature than boys for the most part, they will see the boys as immature lol they will drive the boys mad!
Putting them all in the same rooms makes them more like siblings than potential partners. They will look outside for relationships though the boys they are living with may come on like big brothers which is only good!

There actually is something to that. My own experience back in the mid-Triassic was that other than the occasional drunken hookup people tended to look elsewhere for sex and romance. The potential for gossip and really ugly breakups was just too obvious.

Girls more mature than boys?

Once, when I was just getting interested in girls my mother said I should stick with my own age or a little younger. She said girls are two or three years more mature than boys the same age.

I asked when the boys caught up.

She looked very tired and said "Never."

 

[MA-Caver]

Seeing how boys actually live is probably responsible for the majority of college-age lesbianism

Loud. Unhygenic. Three week old beer cans on the floor. Underwear that moves around under its own power and is demanding the vote. More testosterone than myelin. Sports mad. And if a bunch of them get together it's even money that there will be property damage.

Girls start looking pretty good.

I'm afraid that I'd have to disagree with this. In my experience a lot of lesbian friends that I have told me they chose the way they are because of either they've been attracted to girls all their lives, or some dip-wad of a guy made the rest of us wonderful guys look bad ... by beating her, raping, dominating, just being the jerk-oid that women really hate, of course when they first met the dip-wad he was Mr. Wonderful. Others I've known have made their choice because of incest or just plain abuse.
Lots of women have brothers and lots of those brothers are typical males as you described. So they're pretty darn used to it. So the if the male is going to be atypical then he's gonna know what a nagging wife is going to be like ... but then women can be just as slobby as men... as evident (though it's extreme case here) http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/apr/29/no-headline---29ffilthy/

I asked when the boys caught up.
She looked very tired and said "Never."

You should know that is going to be a typical female answer... true as it may be, they're all going to say that by the time they get to of age.

 

[donna]

I agree with Tez and Empty Hands,
These are adults we are talking about.
There comes a point that you have to trust your legally adult offspring to make their own decisions. You will not do them any favours by babying them!!
You teach you children values as they are growing, then at a certain stage you have to let them make their own decisions and trust that you have raised them to think for themselves. Maturity comes from making your own decisions and living with the consequences.I am sure that the shared room arrangements would be on a request system only . I cant see how they could legally just pair people up randomly.

 

[MA-Caver]

I agree with Tez and Empty Hands,
These are adults we are talking about.
There comes a point that you have to trust your legally adult offspring to make their own decisions. You will not do them any favors by babying them!!
You teach you children values as they are growing, then at a certain stage you have to let them make their own decisions and trust that you have raised them to think for themselves. Maturity comes from making your own decisions and living with the consequences.I am sure that the shared room arrangements would be on a request system only . I cant see how they could legally just pair people up randomly.

They do it right now legally... true, same sex but not all same sex pairs get along. I knew one straight and one gay who got paired up in the same room... within a few weeks the straight guy stabbed the gay guy 17 times and threw the body out a 7 story (open) window.

It's not babying them... it's common sense protection of those who, while maybe they're of adult age, they are certainly NOT of adult experience(s) and of adult judgment. I sure as heck wasn't at my college age kids are still kids and if you watch enough college aged shenanigans on You Tube and similar sites you'll probably eventually agree that there is a severe lack of judgmental powers going on in many of those vids.

Alright I'm not going to dispute the possibility that some of these room arrangements will work out just fine and have no incidents. Wanna take that chance with your only child maybe?

 

[Sukerkin]

I'm a little taken aback by some of the views of the world I've read above - it just goes to show that we are what we have experienced and that stereotypes don't help all that much in debate (and that includes my own).

Of what I've read so far it would seem that Caver and jks are of the most similar mind to myself on this one and, unusually, I find myself not concurring with Irene and Todd .

EDIT: By the way, when it comes to being aware of the behaviour of women in domestic environments I have a fair repository of experience to draw on. It ranges from having two sisters (which is seems is a non-anagram of 'mess-makers') to sharing a house with a couple of degree-educated strippers .

 

[tellner]

Probably because both of us have our tongues firmly jammed in our (own) cheeks

 

[Tez3]

I was thinking about this last night and it dawned on me that something was wrong...why are they sharing rooms anyway? Most universities in the UK certainly ones Ive been to have single rooms for students. After the first year they usuaully have to move out of the university supplied accomodation and into digs more often than not a house shared with other students but these days young people expect a room of their own. I can't see many students here being pleased at sharing a room!

 

[jks9199]

I was thinking about this last night and it dawned on me that something was wrong...why are they sharing rooms anyway? Most universities in the UK certainly ones Ive been to have single rooms for students. After the first year they usuaully have to move out of the university supplied accomodation and into digs more often than not a house shared with other students but these days young people expect a room of their own. I can't see many students here being pleased at sharing a room!

In many US colleges, at least for the first year or two, students almost certainly will live on campus or at university housing, usually in dorm rooms with one or more room mates. Some schools don't have enough housing for more than freshman... but a room mate is a normal college experience here. Solo rooms are rare, from what I've heard.

 

[mrhnau]

I was thinking about this last night and it dawned on me that something was wrong...why are they sharing rooms anyway? Most universities in the UK certainly ones Ive been to have single rooms for students. After the first year they usuaully have to move out of the university supplied accomodation and into digs more often than not a house shared with other students but these days young people expect a room of their own. I can't see many students here being pleased at sharing a room!

I'll agree with JKS on that. It also helps make it a bit cheaper for the student. Even when off campus I shared a room with a friend to help reduce costs. Its expensive to go to college!

 

[Archangel M]

Ive been living with my wife for over 15 years now and I still find her sexually attractive. The "put em together and they will get sick of each other" thing I just dont buy.

At least from the (my) male perspective...no matter the "issues" living together may bring up, an attractive female sleeping in the same room with me would override the other issues.

 

[Ping898]

I was thinking about this last night and it dawned on me that something was wrong...why are they sharing rooms anyway? Most universities in the UK certainly ones Ive been to have single rooms for students. After the first year they usuaully have to move out of the university supplied accomodation and into digs more often than not a house shared with other students but these days young people expect a room of their own. I can't see many students here being pleased at sharing a room!

Sometimes moving off campus is not an option especially if you go to school in a less than safe neighborhood, where say the cops even tell you don't leave campus at night unless you want to be shot, if you have no transportation beyond what public transportation exists and aren't part of a sorority/fraternity...I spent 5 years in campus dorms mostly cause no other safe choices existed and in my experience only way you got a solo room was a) is your were a resident assistant, or b) you had been living on campus long enough to get a low lottery number and enough people in singles left for there to be one open for you....only 12 to 15 singles available for the students on campus...and they were only available to the upperclassmen

 

[jks9199]

Ive been living with my wife for over 15 years now and I still find her sexually attractive. The "put em together and they will get sick of each other" thing I just dont buy.

At least from the (my) male perspective...no matter the "issues" living together may bring up, an attractive female sleeping in the same room with me would override the other issues.

That's another good point...

Living with my wife for the last year and half hasn't diminished my attraction to her... just increased the level of confusion and puzzlement in my life!

 

[Tez3]

Sounds like going to university is an experience and a half in some places! though to us colleges and universities are two different types of extablishment though just to confuse things the Oxbridge Universities have colleges.
Usually only freshmen get accomodation in Halls of Residence and as I said they are single rooms, (I don't actually know of anywhere they share but there could be places I admit) I don't think British students would be impressed too much at having to share a room.
There's usually plenty of flat/house shares available for students to rent in university towns. sharing is cheaper. Safety isn't very mush of an issue at least no more so than for anyone else.
I have to ask as I think there may be an age difference here too, our students go to university from age 18 onwards so worrying about them having orgies etc is a little pointless, at 18 they could be in the army in Iraq getting killed!
They can go to college from 16 onwards but college isn't residential at all , it's always local. They can go from college to university.Colleges don't award degrees.

 

[Tez3]

That's another good point...

Living with my wife for the last year and half hasn't diminished my attraction to her... just increased the level of confusion and puzzlement in my life!

Ah but you love her and she's attractive to you, bit different if she looked and was built like a Russian shot putter lol!

 

[Empty Hands]

I have to ask as I think there may be an age difference here too, our students go to university from age 18 onwards so worrying about them having orgies etc is a little pointless, at 18 they could be in the army in Iraq getting killed!

No, there is no age difference, the usual age to go to college/university is 18 here as well. We are just really good at extending the "parenting" ages out to the mid-twenties or even later.

 

[MA-Caver]

No, there is no age difference, the usual age to go to college/university is 18 here as well. We are just really good at extending the "parenting" ages out to the mid-twenties or even later.

Yep.
I agree with my father now who told me when I was a teenager at 17 fast approaching that magical "legal at 18 age" that a man/woman shouldn't be considered a man/woman until they are 21.
Only when I reached my mid 30's did I realize he was actually right about it.

 

[donald]

The way I was at college age oh yeah I would have been all for it. Now as a Christian, dad, and oh yeah in my 40's. I am not thinking its such a hot idea. Just the away from home thing, and now young ladies in the dorm 24-7. Not thinkin its a good idea. Just too much temptation all around.


1stJohn1:9

 

[mrhnau]

Ah but you love her and she's attractive to you, bit different if she looked and was built like a Russian shot putter lol!

I'lll take offense at that! I married a shot putter! And she is Easter European! And she is HOT!