hardheadjarhead
Senior Master
As the high school teacher was correcting essays written by
her students she read, "Pedro jumped on his burrow and
rode off into the sunset."
She wrote at the bottom of the page, "You obviously have
problems with homonyms. A burrow is a hole in the ground.
A burro is an ***. At your age it's time to learn the
difference."
--------------
A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of
children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around
to see each child's artwork. As she came to one little girl
who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God
looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing the
girl replied, "They will in a minute."
-------------
A father and son went fishing one day. After a couple hours
in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world
around him.
He asked his father, "How does this boat float?"
The father thought for a moment, then replied, "Don't
rightly know, Son."
The boy returned to his contemplation, then turned back to
his father, "How do fish breathe underwater?"
Once again the father replied, "Don't rightly know, Son."
A little later the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky
blue?"
Again, the father replied. "Don't rightly know, Son."
Worried he was going to annoy his father, he says, "Dad, do
you mind my asking you all of these questions?"
"Of course not, Son. If you don't ask questions, you'll
remain ignorant and never learn anything."
--------------
The kindergarten class had settled down to its coloring
books.
Willie came up to the teacher's desk and said, "Miss
Francis, I ain't got no crayons."
"Willie," Miss Francis said, "you mean, "I don't have any
crayons.' You don't have any crayons. We don't have any
crayons. They don't have any crayons. Do you see what I'm
getting at?"
"Not really," Willie said, "What happened to all the freakin'
crayons?"
----------------
The eight-year old boy had never spoken a word-ever. One afternoon, as he sat eating his lunch he turned to his mother and said, "Soup's cold."
His astonished mother tearfully exclaimed, "Son, I've waited so long
to hear you speak. But all these years you never said a thing. Why haven't you spoken before?"
The boy looked at her and replied, "Up until now, everything's been okay."
her students she read, "Pedro jumped on his burrow and
rode off into the sunset."
She wrote at the bottom of the page, "You obviously have
problems with homonyms. A burrow is a hole in the ground.
A burro is an ***. At your age it's time to learn the
difference."
--------------
A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of
children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around
to see each child's artwork. As she came to one little girl
who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God
looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing the
girl replied, "They will in a minute."
-------------
A father and son went fishing one day. After a couple hours
in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world
around him.
He asked his father, "How does this boat float?"
The father thought for a moment, then replied, "Don't
rightly know, Son."
The boy returned to his contemplation, then turned back to
his father, "How do fish breathe underwater?"
Once again the father replied, "Don't rightly know, Son."
A little later the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky
blue?"
Again, the father replied. "Don't rightly know, Son."
Worried he was going to annoy his father, he says, "Dad, do
you mind my asking you all of these questions?"
"Of course not, Son. If you don't ask questions, you'll
remain ignorant and never learn anything."
--------------
The kindergarten class had settled down to its coloring
books.
Willie came up to the teacher's desk and said, "Miss
Francis, I ain't got no crayons."
"Willie," Miss Francis said, "you mean, "I don't have any
crayons.' You don't have any crayons. We don't have any
crayons. They don't have any crayons. Do you see what I'm
getting at?"
"Not really," Willie said, "What happened to all the freakin'
crayons?"
----------------
The eight-year old boy had never spoken a word-ever. One afternoon, as he sat eating his lunch he turned to his mother and said, "Soup's cold."
His astonished mother tearfully exclaimed, "Son, I've waited so long
to hear you speak. But all these years you never said a thing. Why haven't you spoken before?"
The boy looked at her and replied, "Up until now, everything's been okay."