# Bad language at work.....



## Sarah (Jan 12, 2005)

Dear Employees:

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals
throughout the company have been using foul language during the course 
of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints
received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of
language will no longer be tolerated. We do however realize the 
critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when
communicating with co-workers. Therefore, a list of 18 New and 
Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases have been provided so that proper exchange of  ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

1) TRY SAYING:
I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF:
You don't know what the f___ you're doing.

2) TRY SAYING:
She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF:
She's a ball-busting b__ch.

3) TRY SAYING:
Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

4) TRY SAYING:
I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF:
No f______ way.

5) TRY SAYING:
Really?
INSTEAD OF:
You've got to be sh__ing me!

6) TRY SAYING:
Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF:
Tell someone who gives a sh__.

7) TRY SAYING:
I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF:
It's not my f______ problem.

8) TRY SAYING:
That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF:
What the f___?

9) TRY SAYING:
I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF:
This sh__ won't work.

10) TRY SAYING:
I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF:
Why the f_ didn't you tell me sooner?

11) TRY SAYING:
He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF:
He's got his head up his a__.

12) TRY SAYING:
Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF:
Eat sh__ and die.

13) TRY SAYING:
So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF:
Kiss my a__.

14) TRY SAYING:
I'm a bit overloaded at the moment
INSTEAD OF:
F___ it, I'm on salary.

15) TRY SAYING:
I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF:
Shove it up your a__.

16) TRY SAYING:
I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF:
This job sucks.

17) TRY SAYING:
You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF:
Who the f___ died and made you boss?

18) TRY SAYING:
He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF:
He's a pr_ck.

Thank You,
Human Resources


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## Ceicei (Jan 12, 2005)

Actually, all of this is true. Common courtesy and good customer service (whether internal and external of the company) goes a long way in the business world.... To do otherwise would be a quick way to "see the door".

  How much of this foul language is a problem today?

  - Ceicei


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## MA-Caver (Jan 12, 2005)

The "Try Saying" part of that sounds like a typical Mormon day at work in Utah to me. Except *sometimes* they'll use expleitives like Shoot, Dang, Flippin, Fetch, Heck, Darn, Butt (or better yet: Bum) and so forth.  And all of that with a *SMILE* baby!  :uhyeah:


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## Simon Curran (Jan 13, 2005)

I think I need to make a copy of that for my desk at work so that I can respond in the appropriate manner the next time the boss is being an ****, erm oops I mean we are not in total agreement...


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## MA-Caver (Jan 13, 2005)

SIMONCURRAN said:
			
		

> I think I need to make a copy of that for my desk at work so that I can respond in the appropriate manner the next time the boss is being an ****, erm oops I mean we are not in total agreement...


Yes but I think the key is after careful study of those is to make sure that your mouth isn't traveling faster than the speed of your brain.


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## Simon Curran (Jan 16, 2005)

MACaver said:
			
		

> Yes but I think the key is after careful study of those is to make sure that your mouth isn't traveling faster than the speed of your brain.


Could be...:idunno:


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## TonyM. (Jan 16, 2005)

Watch Ramsay's kitchen Nightmares on the BBC.


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