# New car design for women



## Tames D

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?p...aid=-1&auser=0&oid=90239401707&id=98027513573 


_Renault and Ford are working on a new small car for women. __
__They are mixing the Clio and the Taurus, and calling it the "Clitaurus." __
__It comes in pink and the average male thief won't be able to find it,
even if someone tells him where it is._


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## teekin

Nice. :lol2:


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## Jade Tigress

LMAO!!!! :rofl:


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## Flea

Cut, pasted, and plagiarized.


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## CoryKS

Imagine the repair bills.  The cost of labor alone will skyrocket because the damn thing has a habit of disappearing while you're working on it.


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## Ken Morgan

CoryKS said:


> Imagine the repair bills. The cost of labor alone will skyrocket because the damn thing has a habit of disappearing while you're working on it.


 
That, and the damn thing will only work properly a few weeks a month at best, despite your best efforts you never know if it&#8217;ll work at all. It may be too cold, or too hot&#8230;


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## Carol

Its all a matter of training.  Once a guy knows how to drive it, it can run very, very well.


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## Ken Morgan

Carol said:


> Its all a matter of training. Once a guy knows how to drive it, it can run very, very well.


 
LOL! 

Actually i've never had an issue with one before, at least I think so....I hear that they can also pretend to be running fine when in fact they're not...


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## Jenny_in_Chico

Ken Morgan said:


> LOL!
> 
> Actually i've never had an issue with one before, at least I think so....I hear that they can also pretend to be running fine when in fact they're not...


 
Or you hear it started right up for your best friend...


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## Ken Morgan

Jenny_in_Chico said:


> Or you hear it started right up for your best friend...


 
I was wondering when you were going to add your 0.02 in.


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## Jenny_in_Chico

Ken Morgan said:


> I was wondering when you were going to add your 0.02 in.


 
My 0.02 is usually priceless.


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## crushing

It's fun to see what that baby has under the hood.  I read some complaints above, maybe there is a timing issue?  Also, I wonder if glow plugs help when it's cold?


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## Tames D

crushing said:


> It's fun to see what that baby has under the hood. I read some complaints above, maybe there is a timing issue? Also, I wonder if glow plugs help when it's cold?


 
He said "under the hood" :rofl:


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## Sukerkin

I am sorry.  I don't understand this conversation  ... :angel:


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## Carol

Sukerkin said:


> I am sorry.  I don't understand this conversation  ... :angel:



That's OK Suke, we know you are British, nudge nudge wink wink, know what I mean?  :lol:


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## Ken Morgan

Sukerkin said:


> I am sorry. I don't understand this conversation ... :angel:


 
That's OK, I'm participating and I still don't understand either....


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## Sukerkin

{Chuckles}  I shall read on regardless - perhaps understanding will come to me in the fullness of time .


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## teekin

While some models need to be delt with firmly some need a more delicate loving touch. In allmost all cases the engine does need to be warmed up properly before peak performance can be expected. Sufficient lubrication is the key to keep things running smoothly. 
 In allmost all cases you should obtain an Owners Manual and info beyond just the basic Owner's Manual is highly encouraged. :ladysman:
lori


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## Chris Parker

I have a number of lines about "getting assistance from other owners", but we could be veering into unseemly territory here... so I won't.


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## Ken Morgan

Grendel308 said:


> In allmost all cases you should obtain an Owners Manual and info beyond just the basic Owner's Manual is highly encouraged. :ladysman:
> lori


 
There in lays the issue. The owners manual is never the same from one model to the next. Also the owners manual you get with the model is outdated right away, and you need to buy/upgrade the new version every 3 - 6 months!! Believe me...you never, ever, ever want to use the old owners manual.....


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## teekin

In Most/Allmost All cases using information gleened from a previous Owner's Manual when working with the current model will result in you resorting to Other modes of transportation! :whip1:

lori


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## Ken Morgan

Grendel308 said:


> In Most/Allmost All cases using information gleened from a previous Owner's Manual when working with the current model will result in you resorting to Other modes of transportation! :whip1:
> 
> lori


 
LOL!!!:lfao::lfao: 

Lori :asian::asian:


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## Jenny_in_Chico

Especially if you like to store your equipment in the trunk.


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## Andy Moynihan

Carol said:


> That's OK Suke, we know you are British, nudge nudge wink wink, know what I mean? :lol:


 

[Eric Idle] wink wink nudge nudge say....no....MORE!!! [/Eric Idle]


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## Gary Crawford

Carol said:


> Its all a matter of training.  Once a guy knows how to drive it, it can run very, very well.


Will you give me driving lessons?


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## Carol

Gary Crawford said:


> Will you give me driving lessons?



Hmm...that's a possibility.  But I won't issue a learner's permit to someone that's already driving other models.  So not worth the hassle.


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## CoryKS

Carol said:


> Hmm...that's a possibility. But I won't issue a learner's permit to someone that's already driving other models. So not worth the hassle.


 
What about those of us who use public transportation?


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## Gary Crawford

the experience can prove valuable. Especially since I know how to finesse the gears.


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## Carol

Gary Crawford said:


> the experience can prove valuable. Especially since I know how to finesse the gears.




I don't share my engine with other drivers.  I'd rather drive alone


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## Ken Morgan

Carol said:


> I don't share my engine with other drivers. I'd rather drive alone


 
Thank god were so environmentally conscience these days, the newer batteries for these engines, regardless of the model, last a long time.though I doubt much can trump a good driver


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## teekin

Gary Crawford said:


> *the experience can prove valuable. Especially since I know how to finesse the gears.*


 
Yep. This is what All _wanna be_ test pilots say. What happens is they typically barely have a clue how to work a stick, have a leadfoot with the gas, don't have the patience to let the engine and tranny warm up properly, ride the clutch Hard, and then when the engine starts to burn up and fade they blame the car not thier piss poor driving. 
 The ones that make my engine purr like a happy ***** cat -vampfeed- are the ones who know just by the sounds the entire car makes and the vibration of the chassis, the Grrrroowll of the engine, what to do with the stick. They know it is the driver not the vehicle that makes the ride. :ladysman:
 lori


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## Ken Morgan

Grendel308 said:


> Yep. This is what All _wanna be_ test pilots say. What happens is they typically barely have a clue how to work a stick, have a leadfoot with the gas, don't have the patience to let the engine and tranny warm up properly, ride the clutch Hard, and then when the engine starts to burn up and fade they blame the car not thier piss poor driving.
> The ones that make my engine purr like a happy ***** cat -vampfeed- are the ones who know just by the sounds the entire car makes and the vibration of the chassis, the Grrrroowll of the engine, what to do with the stick. They know it is the driver not the vehicle that makes the ride. :ladysman:
> lori


 
I think I'm in love.


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## Carol

*edit* duplicate post please delete


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## Carol

Ken Morgan said:


> Thank god were so environmentally conscience these days, the newer batteries for these engines, regardless of the model, last a long time.though I doubt much can trump a good driver



Ohhhh, nothing can.  Nothing can.  The driver is the best part.  But when the driver's baggage loads down the vehicle, then what's the point?   I prefer a driver that's free to fly, the trips are far, far better.   And I don't have to worry about any contaminants mucking up the works.


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## Carol

Grendel308 said:


> Yep. This is what All _wanna be_ test pilots say. What happens is they typically barely have a clue how to work a stick, have a leadfoot with the gas, don't have the patience to let the engine and tranny warm up properly, ride the clutch Hard, and then when the engine starts to burn up and fade they blame the car not thier piss poor driving.
> The ones that make my engine purr like a happy ***** cat -vampfeed- are the ones who know just by the sounds the entire car makes and the vibration of the chassis, the Grrrroowll of the engine, what to do with the stick. They know it is the driver not the vehicle that makes the ride. :ladysman:
> lori



Preach on hun


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## Tames D

Grendel308 said:


> The ones that make my engine purr like a happy ***** cat -vampfeed- are the ones who know just by the sounds the entire car makes and the vibration of the chassis, the Grrrroowll of the engine, what to do with the stick. They know it is the driver not the vehicle that makes the ride. :ladysman:
> lori


 
OH, I just know your talking bout me...


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## teekin

Well Tames D sorry but not You specificly, by proxy perhaps. I am thinking of those whom I happen to know have that certain magic touch that can elicit just the right rev at the right time to get peak performance. Not an easy task. Some seem to have an apptitude however. I wonder if it is inborn or practice? A bit of both I would guess and true love/passion for thier work. Passion I think is more important than anything else. 

lori


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## Ken Morgan

Grendel308 said:


> Passion I think is more important than anything else.


 
:asian:


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## CoryKS

Grendel308 said:


> Yep. This is what All _wanna be_ test pilots say. What happens is they typically barely have a clue how to work a stick, have a leadfoot with the gas, don't have the patience to let the engine and tranny warm up properly, ride the clutch Hard, and then when the engine starts to burn up and fade they blame the car not thier piss poor driving.
> The ones that make my engine purr like a happy ***** cat -vampfeed- are the ones who know just by the sounds the entire car makes and the vibration of the chassis, the Grrrroowll of the engine, what to do with the stick. They know it is the driver not the vehicle that makes the ride. :ladysman:
> lori


 
I put on my goggles and driving gloves...


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## The Last Legionary

You owe me a new soda. This thread made me sputter. :lol:


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## Jenny_in_Chico

The Last Legionary said:


> You owe me a new soda. This thread made me sputter. :lol:


 
I'd had hopes that you possessed more...control.


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## Gary Crawford

my feelings are now hurt. I am skillful and gentle driver. I contacted Honda and Toyota cause I want them to build a "guys minivan". It will be a cross between a Prius and an Oddessy. They can call it "P____wagon"


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## crushing

Gary, Glad you didn't settle for the Dodge Buick concoction.


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## Ken Morgan

Jenny_in_Chico said:


> I'd had hopes that you possessed more...control.


 
Probably hasn't been driving for a while...


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## Carol

Gary Crawford said:


> my feelings are now hurt. I am skillful and gentle driver. I contacted Honda and Toyota cause I want them to build a "guys minivan". It will be a cross between a Prius and an Oddessy. They can call it "P____wagon"



Skillful and gentle isn't a bad thing.  I just don't go for having too many cars in the parking spot and I absolutely hate cleaning up someone else's grease off my interior.


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## Big Don

Watching the Seinfeld episode right now, DELORES!


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## teekin

Hmmmm, maybe it's the mechanic in me but sometimes I LIKE getting dirty. Hell I remeber having to wash grease out of my hair, off my face, down my neck, it just got everywhere! Not that I minded, to me it was just proof that I had put in a Long Hard day. I bet I slept like the dead that night. :angel:
lori

PS Legion, what kind of Soda? Do you want Gin with your Soda?


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## Ken Morgan

Grendel308 said:


> Hmmmm, maybe it's the mechanic in me but sometimes I LIKE getting dirty. Hell I remeber having to wash grease out of my hair, off my face, down my neck, it just got everywhere! Not that I minded, to me it was just proof that I had put in a Long Hard day. I bet I slept like the dead that night. :angel:
> lori
> 
> PS Legion, what kind of Soda? Do you want Gin with your Soda?


 
Confirmed. I'm in love!


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## Carol

Grendel308 said:


> Hmmmm, maybe it's the mechanic in me but sometimes I LIKE getting dirty. Hell I remeber having to wash grease out of my hair, off my face, down my neck, it just got everywhere! Not that I minded, to me it was just proof that I had put in a Long Hard day. I bet I slept like the dead that night. :angel:
> lori
> 
> PS Legion, what kind of Soda? Do you want Gin with your Soda?



Getting dirty on your own is no problem.  But cleaning up after someone else getting grimy by working on another car?  Not gonna happen here.


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## Ken Morgan

Grendel308 said:


> Hmmmm, maybe it's the mechanic in me but sometimes I LIKE getting dirty. Hell I remeber having to wash grease out of my hair, off my face, down my neck, it just got everywhere! Not that I minded, to me it was just proof that I had put in a Long Hard day. I bet I slept like the dead that night. :angel:
> lori
> 
> PS Legion, what kind of Soda? Do you want Gin with your Soda?


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## Flea

Ken Morgan said:


> Confirmed. I'm in love!



I think I might be too.  :fanboy:


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## seasoned

After reading all the posts, I got thinking. I haven't been out for a ride in awhile. I got the old nuts and bolts out of the garage, pulled out, down the street, got lost. :shrug:


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## Carol

seasoned said:


> After reading all the posts, I got thinking. I haven't been out for a ride in awhile. I got the old nuts and bolts out of the garage, pulled out, down the street, got lost. :shrug:


 
And lemme guess...you STILL didn't ask for directions!  :lol2:


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## Flea

Y'know, I plagiarized this and posted the OJ (Original Joke of course) to another forum I frequent.  On there, it generated a lot of hand-wringing about "misandry" and how nobody seems to mind _men_-bashing.  But reframe the joke at womens' expense and all hell would break loose ...

To be fair, eventually several people told that one hand-wringer to cool it and he did.  But what a waste of a good joke.  I really enjoyed the conversation over here.


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