# Redheads....



## Bob Hubbard (Jan 29, 2003)

(Since we got a blond joke series going, I figured it was only fair to add some for Redheads.)

Q. How do you know a guy at the beach has a redhead for a girlfriend? 
A. She has scratched "stay off MY TURF!" on his back with her nails 

Q. What do you call a Redhead with an attitude? 
A. Normal 

Q. What does a redhead, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common? 
A. Men always miss them 

Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? 
A. A redhead! 

Q. How do you know when your redhead has forgiven you? 
A. She stops washing your clothes in the toilet bowl 

Q. How do you know when a redhead has been using a computer? 
A. There's a hammer embedded in the monitor 

Q. What's safer: a redhead or a piranha? 
A. The piranha. They only attack in schools 

Q. How do you know when you've satisfied a redhead? 
A. She unties you

Q: What is the difference between a redhead and a computer?
A: Redhead won't accept a three and a half inch 

Q: What do redheads and McDonald's have in common?
A: You've never had it so good and so fast. 

Q: What's the Redhead Dating Motto?
A: The fastest way to a man's heart is through his ribcage. 

--------
The Redhead 

A young redhead goes into the doctor's 
office and says that her body hurts 
wherever she touches it. 

"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me." 

She takes her finger and pushes her 
elbow and screams in agony. 
She pushes her knee and screams, 
pushes her ankle and screams. 
Everywhere she touches makes her scream. 

The doctor says, "You're not really a 
redhead, are you?" 

She says "No, I'm really a blonde". 

"I thought so," he says. 
"You have a broken finger." 
---------


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## Nate_Hoopes (Jan 29, 2003)

Wellllll...... Since i Myself have dated a redhead all i can say is :erg:  WOW that was very accurate kaith, now dont get me wrong its a little exaggerated(sp?) but i will say that redheads are all at once the best time and the worst time youve ever had...


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## KenpoGirl (Jan 29, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Kaith Rustaz _
> *(Since we got a blond joke series going, I figured it was only fair to add some for Redheads.)
> 
> Q. How do you know a guy at the beach has a redhead for a girlfriend?
> ...




HEY!!!!

I resemble that remark(s)!!    

:angel:


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## Bob Hubbard (Jan 29, 2003)

I like RedHeads.....I've dated several....

have the scars to prove it.....

I miss them.


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## Seig (Jan 30, 2003)

please, do *NOT* let my beloved Tess see this thread.


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## Kirk (Jan 30, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *please, do NOT let my beloved Tess see this thread. *



ROFL!  Dot and Tess immediately came to mind as I was reading
this!


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## Cliarlaoch (Jan 30, 2003)

Speaking as a redheaded Scotsman, all these things are both TRUE and apply to both men and women reds. I suppose it suits that some of us are martial artists. (You broke my favorite CD! JUDO CHOP!!!)

As a further example: I'm descended from a Scottish family (Taylor), who earned the nickname "Tailleur Dubhe na Twaighe" in Gaelic, or "the Black Taylor of the Axe," for their propensity to use a Lochaber Axe on people... apparently, the redheads in my family inhereted all the irritability with little of the ability to intimidate people. Darn.

If that doesn't show how many issues we reds have got, I don't know what does.


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## Seig (Jan 31, 2003)

Tess' maiden name is McIntyre.  As an offical member of the Clan, I think I am the only card-carrying Scot-Jewin the world.


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## Seig (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Kirk _
> *ROFL!  Dot and Tess immediately came to mind as I was reading
> this! *


Just a point I want to bring up, a red head does not have to be involved with you in a relationship to invoke scars.......


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## Kirk (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *Just a point I want to bring up, a red head does not have to be involved with you in a relationship to invoke scars....... *



D'oh!


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## KenpoTess (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *please, do NOT let my beloved Tess see this thread. *



*Guess who's here*


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## Rich Parsons (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoTess _
> **Guess who's here* *



Seig,

It looks like you are a very lucky man.


(* Looks around and wonders where all the nice lookiing redheads who like martial arts are? Ok I like Brunettes and Blonedes as well  *)


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## KenpoGirl (Jan 31, 2003)

Whoever said Blondes have more fun, must never have met a Red Head.


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## KenpoGirl (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoGirl _
> *Whoever said Blondes have more fun, must never have met a Red Head.   *



Pooh didn't work.    Lets try again.


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## Rob_Broad (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoGirl _
> *HEY!!!!
> 
> I resemble that remark(s)!!
> ...



They meant natural redheads, gray doesn't count!:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:


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## KenpoGirl (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rob_Broad _
> *They meant natural redheads, gray doesn't count!:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: *



Well at least I hair!!!  :rofl:


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## Rob_Broad (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoGirl _
> *Well at least I hair!!!  :rofl: *



I have lots of hair.  I find it on the pillow every morning.


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## KenpoGirl (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rob_Broad _
> *I have lots of hair.  I find it on the pillow every morning. *



One of my sisters old boyfriends use to say ......

"I'm not loosing my hair, its in a shoe box in the closet."  :rofl:


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## Cliarlaoch (Jan 31, 2003)

With regards to the earlier comment from Seig, being Scots and Jewish ain't a bad thing!  

Think of the combination: Eating healthy food so you can drink up a storm to make up for it (and by healthy food, I mean Kosher, not haggis... and by drink up a storm, take your pick). 

I'm glad I'm a redhead, and I'm proud of the Scots blood, so I suppose I can take a bit of ribbing now and again... 




But then, I'm a redhead, so if you find any posts that have [censored] all over 'em, that'd be me.


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## jfarnsworth (Jan 31, 2003)

TESS!!!!  If that's your real picture thumbs up!!
Seig!!  Your a lucky man.   - How in the world did you land her????


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## KenpoTess (Jan 31, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *TESS!!!!  If that's your real picture thumbs up!!
> Seig!!  Your a lucky man.   - How in the world did you land her???? *



Jason.. Of course it's my picture.. taken last week.... Mr Conatser is my instructor, I think he will attest to the authenticity *S*


Tess


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## Matt Stone (Jan 31, 2003)

*KenpoTess* - yowza.  And thas' all I got to say about that...

:asian:


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## Seig (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *TESS!!!!  If that's your real picture thumbs up!!
> Seig!!  Your a lucky man.   - How in the world did you land her???? *


A real good lure and 6lb test


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## Seig (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Seig,
> 
> It looks like you are a very lucky man.
> ...


Yes, I am.


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## Seig (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoGirl _
> *Well at least I hair!!!  :rofl: *


They do make _Rogaine_ for women.  Although, I must admit, I never knew hair was a verb.


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## Seig (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Cliarlaoch _
> *I'm glad I'm a redhead, and I'm proud of the Scots blood, so I suppose I can take a bit of ribbing now and again...
> 
> 
> ...


I have learned that if you are going to rib a Scot, you had best be a damned good fighter, be able to take a hell of a beating, or have a huge headstart.  I leanred all that from my wife!:rofl:


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## Goldendragon7 (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoGirl _
> *One of my sisters old boyfriends use to say ......
> 
> "I'm not loosing my hair, its in a shoe box in the closet."  :rofl: *



Mr. Parker used to give these "words of wisdom" to those who were losing their hair.........

He told them if anyone asks if you are losing your hair say: .... "NO, I'm not losing my hair....... I'm gaining more face!"

:rofl:


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## KenpoGirl (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *They do make Rogaine for women.  Although, I must admit, I never knew hair was a verb. *



Yah Yah, another perfectly good joke ruined by thinking one thing and typing another.  :shrug:

I didn't read my message and then whe Rob responded as I thought he would I thought all was well.   

"At least I HAVE hair"  See, funny stuff eh?


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## jfarnsworth (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoTess _
> *Jason.. Of course it's my picture.. taken last week.... Mr Conatser is my instructor, I think he will attest to the authenticity *S*
> 
> 
> Tess *



I figured it was. However it couldn't compare with your avatar since it's a little too small to make the comparrison.  Of course if I could put my head on say Criag Titus' body then I would be happy and no one would know the difference until they seen me in public.


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## jfarnsworth (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *A real good lure and 6lb test *



Is that all? Man I figured you'd have to go all out.


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## Bob Hubbard (Feb 1, 2003)

I once made the comment that i'd be happy to be sandwiched between 2 attractive red heads....

I was informed that I wouldn't survive the experience.

I said, so?


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## Seig (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Is that all? Man I figured you'd have to go all out.  *


With great finesse and an amazing display of skill she finally caught me.


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## KenpoTess (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *With great finesse and an amazing display of skill she finally caught me. *






*eyes as big as saucers as I read this~!!!!

*looking over at you on the other computer.......................................................................................


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## Seig (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoTess _
> **eyes as big as saucers as I read this~!!!!
> 
> *looking over at you on the other computer....................................................................................... *


well, it's true.


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## KenpoTess (Feb 1, 2003)

TRUE~!! *Scoffs.. Sputters. 

I have you know.. Seig and I met online.. I was on my way to Australia and decided to stop in Florida to meet some friends.. Seig included..  well I didn't get to Oz..   but it was a bit more than 6lb test line.. more like Fireline ...


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## Seig (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by KenpoTess _
> *TRUE~!! *Scoffs.. Sputters.
> 
> I have you know.. Seig and I met online.. I was on my way to Australia and decided to stop in Florida to meet some friends.. Seig included..  well I didn't get to Oz..   but it was a bit more than 6lb test line.. more like Fireline ... *


Proves she is a red head, doesn't she?


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## KenpoTess (Feb 1, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *Proves she is a red head, doesn't she? *



Ok.. I think you better entertain me some other way... 

*hint hint


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## Seig (Feb 1, 2003)

Know that if I do not return by Tuesday, I died happy


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## Jill666 (Feb 1, 2003)

:barf:


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## Seig (Feb 2, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Jill666 _
> *:barf: *


If you think we are nauseating online,m you should see us R/L


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## Master of Blades (Feb 2, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Jill666 _
> *:barf: *



I think I can second that lol



> If you think we are nauseating online,m you should see us R/L



Do we have to?


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## Seig (Feb 3, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *
> 
> Do we have to?  *


Only if you are very fortunate


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## Cliarlaoch (Feb 3, 2003)

Another truism about redheads, it seems... we like double entendres and other such styles of humour. 

(And this appears to be true based on some of the above interactions, eh?)



--s'okay, I can joke... I'm one of 'em!


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