# For any Star Wars Fans Out There



## daniel_r (Apr 4, 2002)

Top 15 Star Wars Euphemisms for Masturbation
15. Shooting Womprats in Beggar's Canyon 

14. Grooming the Wookie 

13. Making the Kessel Run 

12. Polishing Vader's Helmet 

11. Evacuating Tatooine 

10. Unsheathing the Meatsaber 

9. Releasing the Special Edition 

8. Jumping to Delight Speed 

7. Communicating with Red Leader One 

6. Lightsaber Practice with Captain Solo 

5. Tinkering With the R2 Unit 

4. Manually Targeting the Rebel Base 

3. Performing the Jedi Hand Trick 

2. Scratching Yoda Behind the Ears 

1.Test Firing the Death Star 


Also

If Samuel L.Jackson was in Star Wars... 

1. You can stick your well-laid Death Star plans up your well-laid ***. 

2. You must go to Dagobah, where you will be taught by Yoda, the sly, sweet mother f****r who taught me this ****. 

3. Thats no moon, ******* - thats a f****ing space station! 

4. I don't care how good you say they are. I ain't fightin' alongside no f**k-*** teddy bears. 

5. You don't need to see my goddamn identification, 'cause these ain't the motherf****n' droids you're looking for. 

6. Womp rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'll never know, 'cause even if it did I wouldn't eat the filthy motherf****r. 

7. This is your father's lightsaber. When you absolutely, positively, have to kill every motherf******g stormtrooper in the room... accept no substitutes. 

8. If Obi-wan ain't home then I don't know what the f**k we're gonna do. I ain't got no other connections on Tattooine. 

9. Feel the Force, motherf****r. 

10. You sendin' in the Fett? ****, Hutt, that's all you had to say! 

11. Yeah Chewie's got a hair problem. What the brother gonna do? He's a wookie. 

12. Does Jabba the Hutt look like a *****? 

13. Hand me my lightsaber... it's the one that says, 'Bad Mother F****r.


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## TLH3rdDan (Apr 4, 2002)

LMMFAO!!!!! those are awesome love the last one for sam jackson lol


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## daniel_r (Apr 4, 2002)

I think George Lucas should take note and let Sam the Man do his thing... might take the certificate up a few ages but who cares


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## deadhand31 (Apr 17, 2002)

yeah, star wars has some pretty dirty lines. for example:

"Judge me by my size, do you?"

"Get in there you big furry oaf. I don't care what you smell!"

"Come, good food, come!"


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## Cthulhu (Apr 24, 2002)

> _Originally posted by deadhand31 _
> 
> *yeah, star wars has some pretty dirty lines. for example:
> 
> ...



You are *so* going to hell.  

Cthulhu


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## deadhand31 (Apr 26, 2002)

being home sick yesterday, i watched all the original star wars. and i missed one! 

"She may not look like much, kid, but she's got it where it counts!"

 

let the burning begin.


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## Ronin (Apr 29, 2002)

Rumor has it Qui-Gon-Jinn will be cloned in the new movie.  Anyone hear about this?


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## Bob Hubbard (Apr 29, 2002)

QGJ is not cloned in EP2.


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## islandtime (Apr 30, 2002)

> _Originally posted by TLH3rdDan _
> 
> *LMMFAO!!!!! those are awesome love the last one for sam jackson lol *


.....................................................................
Ditto on that. Being a big Sam Jackson fan I was rolling myself

I can see him now quoting " Ezekial  25:17" after cutting someone up with his lightsaber


Gene Gabel


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## daniel_r (Apr 30, 2002)

> _Originally posted by islandtime _
> 
> *
> .....................................................................
> ...



Haha..... I think George Lucas should be taking note... these ideas would make for a nicer family viewing


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## RCastillo (Apr 30, 2002)

"I find your lack of faith disturbing!":miffer:


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## Turner (May 1, 2002)

I've heard talk that there might be another 3 movie sequal using Timothy Zahn's Thrawn trilogy... are any of you as big star wars fans as I and have heard this (and are hoping it's true)?


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## Bob Hubbard (May 1, 2002)

Lucus wants to move on after EP3.  Something about his age, and some other projects he wants to do.  Too bad, the Zahn books woulda been cool.

See my other forum for some news on this, I believe someone posted some links on there to the Lucus article.

http://forums.rustaz.com
:asian:


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## Turner (May 1, 2002)

That is what I heard, but wondered when I kept hearing the rumor pop back up again and again. Then I was really confused when I went to the Star Wars official site and they have pictures of actual people to represented Thrawn, Karrde and Mara Jade instead of drawings.


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## Bob Hubbard (May 1, 2002)

Having not seen those pics, I cant say, but I'd guess they were cosplayers that impressed someone there enough to use their pic.


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## Samurai (May 1, 2002)

Lucas said he was done with STAR WARS after he completes EP3.  This is from TIME magazine (the one with Yoda on the cover).
Thanks
jeremy bays


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## Turner (May 1, 2002)

Kaith, on one of you other forums don't you have a link to an article that states that Lucas is going to redo the Origional Star Wars again.. add some musical themes and a few more scenes to make it flow?

Lucas had a great idea and is the master of the Star Wars universe, but that doesn' t mean that He's the only one that could write it and run it. If he isn't going to play in that galaxy any more he should hand it over to someone who would like to... just my opinion.


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## Bob Hubbard (May 1, 2002)

Yup and Yup.  

Personally, I'd love to see them bring the Zahn trilogy to the big screen.


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## Roland (May 1, 2002)

...what about the petition to have Peter Jackson direct Number 3?

I think the Zahn books have been the best so far. They really do capture the old Star Wars spirit.
They would be good as movies. Problem being, good books rarely make good movies.


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## Turner (May 1, 2002)

I think that would be the vote from the majority of the Expanded Star Wars Universe fans... Zahn is a good writer, I though his trilogy of non-star wars books "Conquerer's Pride" or something of the like was pretty good. You can tell he does his research and knows a little about the military.

If there would be enough people that aren't too Jedi crazy, I think that the X-Wing books and comics could probably be turned into a TV Series... though watering it down a little to fit like one book per season might ruin it too much.

Another good book to turn to a movie would be I, Jedi. Lots of action there, especially when Horn goes and scares the crap out of all the Pirates... Heck, aside from the "Black Fleet Crisis" and "Splinter of the Minds Eye" I think all the books would make great movies.


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## Bob Hubbard (May 1, 2002)

Haven't heard about Jackson... hmm...maybe 

I stopped readin when this whole series of the "New" republic came out... that whole Yuzen (whatever) invasion angle.  Its too far outside what I consider 'SW' ya know?


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## Turner (May 1, 2002)

I don't like it because the Jedi <read: warrior caste> is having a huge moral dilemma that is just so stupid to someone who someone who is a warrior <Military vet and lifetime martial artist> and have been taught the answers to their problem and I know that every single culture from the beginning of time has some sort of Code of Honor that could have been adopted by the Jedi.

I like it because it makes me think. The Vong can't be felt through the force. They come from outside of the galaxy where I guess the force doesn't exist... But we learn from Episode I that the force is all about midi cholorians inside the body. If, as Yoda says in Empire Strikes Back, that the force is in all of nature... rocks, trees, flesh and so forth then why don't the Vong exist in the force? Perhaps it is because the Midi Cholorians only exist within that galaxy, but since the Vong breathe the air and use the soil to build their ships and weapons, wouldn't it make sense that they would absorb some of these Midi Cholorians and be felt in the force?
I also like it because they aren't holding the Jedi nor the characters that sacred. They are killing them left and right so you don't know what to expect. Of course the latest one I read really ticked me off because they killed my favorite character.


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## Roland (May 2, 2002)

seems to be able to sense the Vong now though, I think that happend in the softcover book just before STAR BY STAR.
I have heard that this whole New Jedi order would actually be the next series of movies if they were made too.

Have not read Zahn's sci-fi, but some of his fantasy, i want to read more though, bcause he always seems to be a good read!

The Jackson thing is an online petition I think.

The X-wing sreies would be good too as movies, mabey a cartoon, more adult like though?mmmmmmm


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## Turner (May 2, 2002)

Yes, it was Anakin Solo <Leia's and Hans 3rd Kid for those that haven't gotten into the books> who felt little glimmers of the force in a battle with the Vong... I don't know where the writers will go with that due to the latest developments... I won't spoil the story for those that haven't read the book yet.

I've only ready Zahn's "Conquerer's Pride" books and I've been looking for something else to read, so that would be a great place to go next... his fantasy.

You are right, the X-wing would probably make better cartoons or movies... For young SW fans the twin's and Anakin's Young Jedi Knight series would be good for cartoons.


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## Ronin (May 2, 2002)

For you star wars fans out there I have read and seen a lot of star wars books out there for you to continue being fans.  I agree its sad to see classics like this coming to and end.


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## Goldendragon7 (May 4, 2002)

No..... I won't let it!!:wah:


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## Ronin (May 25, 2002)

I wonder if Lucas will allow other people to follow in with his footsteps.  You never know lucas could just "oversee" the future films.  Theres certainly an audience for it to keep making money.  I'd like to see Yoda have his own films.  "Youngling hand me my lightsaber. "But Master Yoda which one is it?" " It's the one that says Little Bad-***  Mother F**Ker on it, my youngling."


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## ace (Oct 2, 2002)

WHAT!


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## Kenpo Wolf (Oct 3, 2002)

After they get done with SWE3, I would like to see them do a few single spin offs with either a young Han Solo and Chewbacca or Boba Fett. That way, we will still get our Star Wars fix without the long commitment another trilogy would be.


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## ace (Oct 4, 2002)

Kenpo Wolf U have a great idea
:roflmao: :
roflmao: 
:roflmao: 
Primo


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