# Signs TaeKwon-Do has taken over your life



## Shaderon (Mar 14, 2007)

Once more sorry if you've seen if before, I found it on a web site.   My score was 23  *blush*


0-5You need to train more.5-10You still have a life, you need to work on this.15-20It's getting serious.20-30Let me recommend therapy.30+You are beyond all hope!​ 
·        People find it difficult to carry on a conversation with you since you keep shifting between stances and practicing kicks while talking to them.
·        When tripping over your shoelaces you bounce up into fighting stance with a Kiup.
·        You answer your boss Ussss.
·        You tie your bathrobe belt like an uniform belt; making sure that the ends are exactly even and the right way round.
·        You go to sleep each night cuddling at least one martial arts weapon.
·        You insist on your partner tieing their bathrobe belt like an uniform belt.
·        You accept change from the cashier using a perfect knife hand with the thumb carefully tucked in.
·        Every time you handle a screwdriver or razor knife, etc. You just can't help changing grip from hammer to reverse to flip over to dagger grip etc. And your shop assistant is standing cautiously far, far away from you.
·        When you're outside doing a bit of gardening you "practice" with all the neat weapons.
·        You insist on showing your work colleagues your interesting set of bruises on your forearms and shins ever week.
·        Tell your Rugby playing mate he is a pansy because he wont train due to dislocated shoulder.
·        You enjoy limping into work and explaining what injury you got this week.
·        You shut the refrigerator door with a side thrust kick.
·        You open doors with front kicks.
·        Work chairs with high back are really good for practicing turning kicks.
·        You open a door with a front kick and the door bashes the boss as he is walking in.
·        The boss wants to know why the department has so many broken chairs.
·        Switching a light on or off requires a knife hand strike.
·        While using a knife hand strike to switch the lights on, you break the light switch and short out a fuse; leaving the house in the dark.
·        You shop for clothes based on whether you can kick in them.
·        The only clothes you'll wear are tight enough to reveal your fit physique but loose enough to spar in (when you get a spare minute).
·        You actually look forward to being told to work out on the bag.
·        The books in your toilet are Taekwondo patterns, and easy Korean for beginners.
·        The Twelve Days of Christmas becomes: one boxing bag, two boxing gloves, three shin pads (includes an extra pad for the one you'll inevitably lose), four Tokaido gi's, five rolls of adhesive tape....twelve cases of Tiger Balm.
·        You look for a place to live based on the amount of practice space it provides.
·        While practicing patterns, you do an upper block and shatter the glass light fitting (needing several stitches and leaving the room in the dark).
·        You look for a place to live based on the amount of head room it provides.
·        In a boring meeting you start practicing staff techniques with a pencil.
·        You refuse to wear shoes, and look scornfully aloof on those that need to during class.
·        As your classmate withers in pain on the floor, you fantasize about the quickest way to put him out of his misery.
·        You tell beginners that care is need not to be too aggressive, after you flatten some poor sod that tries to hit you.
·        While sparring with beginners you keep stopping to tell them that they are not hitting you hard enough.
·        When all your injuries heal, you go through withdrawals.
·        You view new students as fresh meat.
·        You look forward to working another technique line.
·        You eagerly volunteer to be the instructors demonstration assistant.
·        You believe that one and half hours is far too short for a training session.
·        You enjoyed your last grading test.
·        You say to the shop assistant in the men's store, "Nice pants, but I don't think I can kick in them."
·       "What was I doing in my office when I was spinning around and flailing my arms and legs? Ahhhhhmmmmmmm....."
·        The only way to open and close doors is with spinning kicks.
·        You have begun to master the reflex to commit a very messy murder when, directly after someone finds out you practice martial arts, they immediately ask: "Are you a Black Belt?"
·        You have reached the phase of seeing everybody walking around with blinking little red cross-hairs on all their vital spots
·        The only way to operate a lift is to backfist the correct floor button on the inside of the elevator, based on your memory of the button's location, before you get in far enough to see it.
·        The local orthopaedic surgeons ask you take it easy because you are increasing their waiting lists.
·        Your email tag line is: Pain is Joy.


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## K31 (Mar 14, 2007)

I've started punching the concrete columns in the building I work in as I pass by, does that get me any points?


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## Shaderon (Mar 14, 2007)

Sure you get 1 point for each activity... what's your score?


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## K31 (Mar 14, 2007)

Let's see, I:

-Open doors with the knife edge of my hand.
-Look for ways to rearrange rooms at work so I can practice hyungs.
- Diagram hyungs while bored at meetings at work.
-Use a shelf (just above waist-level) that runs along the walkway by my office to do leg stretches while I'm talking to co-workers.
-When I'm caught examining the scars on my knuckles from bag and pad work, I answer inquiries with "The first rule of fight club is, YOU DON'T TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB!"
-Do stretch kicks in the equipment room at work.
-Go out of my way to drive past the dojang to see whats going on when I'm not training.
-Make my wife go out of her way to drive past the dojang when shes the one driving.
-Practice side kicks at light switches.
-Practice slide steps at the dog.
-While discussing someone who particularly annoys me at work, I mention that I know 16 different ways to kick him (this is to the only person at work who knows I study MAs because she and my wife are friends).
-Punch at the concrete posts that support the building.

I guess I need to work on this more.


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## Shaderon (Mar 14, 2007)

K31 said:


> Let's see, I:
> 
> -When I'm caught examining the scars on my knuckles from bag and pad work, I answer inquiries with "The first rule of fight club is, YOU DON'T TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB!"


 

I love this one!   I might take that up


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## Kacey (Mar 14, 2007)

Hmm... let's see here...

·        You tie your bathrobe belt like an uniform belt; making sure that the ends are exactly even and the right way round.
·        You insist on showing your work colleagues your interesting set of bruises on your forearms and shins ever week.
·        You enjoy limping into work and explaining what injury you got this week.
·        You shut the refrigerator door with a side thrust kick.
·        You shop for clothes based on whether you can kick in them.
·        The only clothes you'll wear are tight enough to reveal your fit physique but loose enough to spar in (when you get a spare minute).
·        You look for a place to live based on the amount of practice space it provides. * And may I just say my realtor thought I was kidding... at first... until the subject of space for patterns kept coming up as a deciding factor on various properties.*
·        In a boring meeting you start practicing staff techniques with a pencil.  *I haven't done that yet... but I will get bored and start writing out the moves in the patterns I'm working on that week... but hey, it looks like I'm taking notes!*
·        You refuse to wear shoes, and look scornfully aloof on those that need to during class.  *We don't wear shoes, unless required by a doctor - skin problems, ankle support boot, etc... *
·        You look forward to working another technique line.
·        You eagerly volunteer to be the instructors demonstration assistant.
·        You enjoyed your last grading test.
·        You say to the shop assistant in the *women*'s store, "Nice pants, but I don't think I can kick in them."
·        You have begun to master the reflex to commit a very messy murder when, directly after someone finds out you practice martial arts, they immediately ask: "Are you a Black Belt?"  *Followed closely by "What would you do if 6 people with guns surrounded you?"  Just how stupid do these people think I am?  And yes, I was actually asked that... *
·        You have reached the phase of seeing everybody walking around with blinking little red cross-hairs on all their vital spots

Huh... that's only 15... I guess I'll just give another 20 years before I consider myself "serious" about TKD!

0-5You need to train more.5-10You still have a life, you need to work on this.*15-20It's getting serious.*20-30Let me recommend therapy.30+You are beyond all hope!


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## terryl965 (Mar 14, 2007)

I guess I would fall in that hopeless range.


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## zDom (Mar 14, 2007)

Shaderon said:


> Once more sorry if you've seen if before, I found it on a web site.   My score was 23  *blush*
> 
> 0-5You need to train more.5-10You still have a life, you need to work on this.15-20It's getting serious.20-30Let me recommend therapy.30+You are beyond all hope!​



OK, lessee... *These:*



Shaderon said:


> · Every time you handle a screwdriver or razor knife, etc. You just can't help changing grip from hammer to reverse to flip over to dagger grip etc. And your shop assistant is standing cautiously far, far away from you.
> · When you're outside doing a bit of gardening you "practice" with all the neat weapons.
> · You shop for clothes based on whether you can kick in them.
> · You actually look forward to being told to work out on the bag.
> ...



... I have to admit, apply to me 





Shaderon said:


> · People find it difficult to carry on a conversation with you since you keep shifting between stances and practicing kicks while talking to them.
> · You view new students as fresh meat.
> · You tell beginners that care is need not to be too aggressive, after you flatten some poor sod that tries to hit you.


Well ... um ... not anymore 




Shaderon said:


> · You tie your bathrobe belt like an uniform belt; making sure that the ends are exactly even and the right way round.



I dont wear a bathrobe. But if I did, this and THIS



Shaderon said:


> · You insist on your partner tieing their bathrobe belt like an uniform belt.



Would both apply 



Shaderon said:


> · You accept change from the cashier using a perfect knife hand with the thumb carefully tucked in.



Well ... not ALWAYS ... and not on purpose ...



Shaderon said:


> · You insist on showing your work colleagues your interesting set of bruises on your forearms and shins ever week.



Not every week! Only the REALLY good ones! 



Shaderon said:


> · You enjoy limping into work and explaining what injury you got this week.



I dont ENJOY it ...



Shaderon said:


> · You shut the refrigerator door with a side thrust kick.
> · You open doors with front kicks.



Only sometimes!



Shaderon said:


> · The only way to open and close doors is with spinning kicks.



Not the ONLY way ...



Shaderon said:


> · The only way to operate a lift is to backfist the correct floor button on the inside of the elevator, based on your memory of the button's location, before you get in far enough to see it.



Pfft. Everybody knows spearhand is the correct technique for elevator buttons 

Spearhands are also acceptable as an alternative for opening and closing doors. Except bathroom doors: push them with backfist knuckles so you dont get germs on fingertips 



Shaderon said:


> · You eagerly volunteer to be the instructors demonstration assistant.
> · You enjoyed your last grading test.



Well, being in hapkido now I have to say: DEFINATELY NOT! 



Shaderon said:


> · You refuse to wear shoes, and look scornfully aloof on those that need to during class.



Shoes aren't ALLOWED on hapkido mats 



Shaderon said:


> · Your email tag line is: Pain is Joy.



Well .... close  (Look below )


Guess I've worked MOST of the TKD out of me over the last couple of years in HKD


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