# Ladies, I need your advice!



## Komah (Nov 24, 2006)

A few weeks ago, I encountered a problem with a fellow classmate. When I fight, I fight men the same way I fight other girls, meaning that I don't put gender in as an issue when I fight. 

Awhile ago, I was matched with this seemingly nice guy about 3 times my size, length and width. I'm excellent with reading people and he gives me this smirk. He had to have been thinking something along the lines of, "Alright, it's just this little girl, this is gonna be easy." I ended up winning the fight with ease, being that he was a green belt and I'm a black belt. After I fought him some more, I noticed him sparing harder with me which wasn't a problem until it got to the point where we weren't practicing anymore, we were actually fighting and trying to hurt each other. Last week I pushed myself into an Asthma attack because of it, but with him, I can tell that he isn't fighting so hard because he wants to be good, or beat me because I'm skilled with sparring. He feels insecure losing to a girl. The last time we sparred, I noticed he started out really hard just to prove his point so I asked, "You're trying to proove your manly-ness tonight aren't you?" He gives me this look, confirming it, and was really trying to hurt me.

Now I know damn well that the point of sparring is to fight and learn how to defend. I fight guys ALL the time, some just as big and far more skilled and we get along just fine. We fight hard with each other and challenge each other. It's purely about skill, not gender. There's a huge difference between a girl and a guy fighting and a guy trying to put the girl in her place. What do you think?

I can't give any proof other than I can read people and sense their intentions but that's not exactly easy to proove. Also his body language and facial expressions gave it away. Since my instucters are sexist pigs, telling them about it did absolutely nothing so I don't really know how to approach the situation, especially if Master Mignogna ignores my request and matches me with him again.

Also, if anyone else here has faced the same problem, let me know.


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## Drac (Nov 24, 2006)

Komah said:


> He feels insecure losing to a girl


 
I am not one of the ladies but I had to comment..That "boy" needs to get a life..So he feels insecure about losing to a girl..TFB...Deal with it..If I let the fact that I lost to a female bother me I don't think I would have progressed in the MA... 





			
				Komah said:
			
		

> especially if Master Mignogna ignores my request and matches me with him again.


 
If the Master matches you up with him again and he displays his idiotic attitude, do what you gotta do..Sorry for going off topic but that kind of attitude REALLY honks me off..


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## Hand Sword (Nov 24, 2006)

I'm a guy too, and all I can say about this is: I second everything Drac Said. If he's going to try to hurt you, do what you need too.

oh yeah,

Welcome to Martial Talk!


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## Kacey (Nov 24, 2006)

As the senior, you have the right - and the skill - to respond at his level of force.  Green belts, at least in TKD, have a lot of power, but they tend to be a little iffy on focus.  My theory (as learned from my sahbum) is that the senior should give the junior one warning (two if you're feeling generous) and then respond in kind - so if he keeps fighting instead of sparring, drop him.  At this point, he will probably go running to the instructor(s) complaining that you're picking on him or bullying him, using your rank against him - at that point, offer to have the instructors watch a round, and then let the green belt control the pace; either he'll tone it down, or you'll have proof, regardless of gender.


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## Drac (Nov 24, 2006)

Kacey said:


> As the senior, you have the right - and the skill - to respond at his level of force. Green belts, at least in TKD, have a lot of power, but they tend to be a little iffy on focus. My theory (as learned from my sahbum) is that the senior should give the junior one warning (two if you're feeling generous) and then respond in kind - so if he keeps fighting instead of sparring, drop him. At this point, he will probably go running to the instructor(s) complaining that you're picking on him or bullying him, using your rank against him - at that point, offer to have the instructors watch a round, and then let the green belt control the pace; either he'll tone it down, or you'll have proof, regardless of gender.


 
Bravo Kacey, well said..


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