# Worst Martial Arts Movies



## auxprix (Aug 12, 2004)

I was very surprised that this specific thread doesn't exist on the forum. There is a "Favorite and most hated MA film" topic, but I think that it's different. I say this because one of the films on my worst list also happends to be one of my favorites due to the laughs that it produces.

I submit two:

2) Gymkata.

I love this movie, just because it is so terrible (in a good way). It stars former gymnastics olympian Kurt Thomas as the protagonist. He is called by the U.S. government to compete in a life-or-death race in the country Parmistan(?) for some reason. Already an accomplished Gymnist, Kurt is tought asian martial arts. He blends the two together to make the ultimate East meets West fighting system. :rofl: 

His style proves to be most effective in Parmistan, since it is apparently a country riddled with randomly placed gymnastics equipment, including (but not limited to) an ancient pummel horse. His deadly Gymkata is vital to his survival, as people dressed like ninja are chasing him throughout the race.

If you see this movie on the rental shelf, pick it up! You won't be disappointed!

1) Renegade Ninja

Makes no sense, and isn't corney enough to laugh at. I assume much of the plot was lost in translation, and I saw a dubbed version. Don't see this.


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## loki09789 (Aug 12, 2004)

Cyborg.

Not necessarily the 'worst' in production quality or talent, but very disappointing given the hype around it when it was released.


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## Randy Strausbaugh (Aug 12, 2004)

Dolomite  
Gloriously bad.  Reeks.


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## MisterMike (Aug 13, 2004)

The Toxic Avenger. Does that count??


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## Marginal (Aug 14, 2004)

Now, when I say worst, I mean worst here. No redeeming value.

Dragon and the Hawk. Much hyped locally because it was an indie flick, but it is terrible beyond measure. (I even had the assistant producer threaten to have my comments on Amazon pulled after I offered up a less than enchanted commentary there.)

Fists of Legend. Supposed sequel to Jet Li's Fist of Legend. Random people fight, and somehow it involves Sun Yat Sen (who mainly seems to just wander aimlessly from place to place.) Some people are supposed to be protecting SYS, but they're rarely in the same place at the same time, and the primary (supposedly) character does just about nothing the entire movie. The Wu Tang Clan's discussion on honor before the movie started was about as coherant.


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## Hanzo04 (Aug 14, 2004)

the worst MA movie of all time is The Last Dragon. lol. i hate that movie.  

" Who's the Master ?"  Sho Nuff!  LOL! hahahahahahaha!


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## Baytor (Aug 14, 2004)

"Ricky-O:  The Story of Ricky"

The absolutely cheesiest I have ever seen.  The special effects were something straight out of power rangers, yet it had the most graphic violence I ever saw.  The main character (Ricky) had superhuman strengh from his practice of tai chi.  He did the whole punching right through people thing.  The worst was when he was fighting a henchman and the henchman tried to strangle him with his own intestines.

Here's a link I found for it.  You have to scroll down about half a page.

http://www.stomptokyo.com/badmoviereport/ricky.html


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## Mark Weiser (Aug 14, 2004)

Oh I can not remember the name of this movie but it was a paradoy of several MA Movies. 

The fight scene with the baby and the killer were priceless.

The Secert Weapon was a tongue with eyes and a pair of lips lol. 

And the Guardian was a Cow that knew Karate and use shots of milk as weapons. I could go on and on lol. 

The Enemy was Aliens flying in Pryamids lol. etc.....

The Fist of Kung Pow I belive lol


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## Baytor (Aug 14, 2004)

Yup, that was Kung Pow.  My favorite part was how the the dubbing would show the dog barking, then it would delay for a couple of seconds before you would hear it.


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## Randy Strausbaugh (Aug 14, 2004)

"...and then, he killed the dog."  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:


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## Baytor (Aug 14, 2004)

"...This is Wimp Lo.  He's an idiot.  We trained him wrong on purpose.":roflmao:


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## Genin Andrew (Aug 15, 2004)

Streetfighter...no comment required.


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## sifu nick (Aug 15, 2004)

any of the American Ninja movies.


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## auxprix (Aug 15, 2004)

Oh, I forgot about all the videogame martial arts movies. They're all bad, but the worst was Double Dragon. Scott Wolf was in it, but he doesn't know any martial arts (save run-fu).


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## Mark Weiser (Aug 15, 2004)

http://movies.yahoo.com/shop?d=hv&cf=info&id=1808404387&intl=us


I am waiting to see if I should add this movie


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## Jim Tindell (Feb 20, 2005)

"Laser Mission" with Brandon Lee. So terrible, but so hilarious!

Every shot looks like they used a home video camera.


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## asangria (Feb 20, 2005)

Kung Pow was an extremely bad movie but I thought the Little Ninja series ranked pretty high also.


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## The Kai (Feb 21, 2005)

Elektra-


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## phlaw (Feb 21, 2005)

"No Retreat, No Surrender" this was horrible.


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## jjmcc (Feb 21, 2005)

Hanzo04 said:
			
		

> the worst MA movie of all time is The Last Dragon. lol. i hate that movie.
> 
> " Who's the Master ?" Sho Nuff! LOL! hahahahahahaha!


NO WAY ITS PRETTY SAD BUT IT A CLASSIC LIKE IT OR NOT


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## jjmcc (Feb 21, 2005)

phlaw said:
			
		

> "No Retreat, No Surrender" this was horrible.


NO WAY ITS LIKE AN ALL TIME CLASSIC WHATS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?


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## jjmcc (Feb 21, 2005)

Brotherhood Of The Wolf....


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## Chronuss (Feb 21, 2005)

phlaw said:
			
		

> "No Retreat, No Surrender" this was horrible.


anything with Van Damme in it is horrible...


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## Chronuss (Feb 21, 2005)

jjmcc said:
			
		

> Brotherhood Of The Wolf....


damn...I thought that one was pretty good.  I like almost all of Marc Dacascos' movies.


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## Kenpodoc (Feb 21, 2005)

The worst martial arts movie is The Matrix (the entire trilogy).  Silly wirework and an overblown sense of self importance.

I loved Kung Pow poking fun at badly written Hong Kong action movies.

Jeff


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## The Kai (Feb 21, 2005)

I can't even begin to say how much this series SUCKED!!!  From the B.S. Fight scenes to the over hyped philosophy


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## Jim Tindell (Feb 21, 2005)

Kung Pow was a satire. It was SUPPOSED to be bad, unlike these other films that take themselves seriously.


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## jjmcc (Feb 22, 2005)

another great movie is ONLY THE STRONG starring Marc Decascos

class movie TOTALLY


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## Sin (Feb 23, 2005)

Kenpodoc said:
			
		

> The worst martial arts movie is The Matrix (the entire trilogy).  Silly wirework and an overblown sense of self importance.




HOW DARE YOU

The matrix Trilogy was one of the movies that got me into MA, of course there is the fantasy, but a true MAist can see that there is a lot of good martial Arts in it.

Sho Lin Soccer, blows serious *** I didn't even watch it all


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## The Kai (Feb 23, 2005)

Actually there ain't nothing good about the Matrix from the poor mans Bruce leee routines, to the dumb philosophy, to the assine wire work, to the "the city is under attack, we must defend ur lives, we MUST...........................Dance"


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## Akashiro Tamaya (Feb 23, 2005)

The TUXEDO by Jackie Chan.  This must have been the worst american production that Chan was involved in.  Don't get me wrong, Jennifer Love-Hewitt is cute, but was really casted wrong in this movie. 


My second worst MA movie is House of Flying Dagger, Can anyone say Sappy ?


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## Jaymeister (Feb 23, 2005)

Mortal Kombat really sucked... But then again, so did the videogames it was based on


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## Touch Of Death (Feb 23, 2005)

"Nine and 1/2 Ninjas"... Need I say more? Its so bad you can't stop watching.


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## The Kai (Feb 23, 2005)

Dud

I lost my copy of this movie


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## OUMoose (Feb 23, 2005)

Akashiro Tamaya said:
			
		

> The TUXEDO by Jackie Chan.



Unfortunately any of Jackie Chan's recent movies have been... poor...

The Tuxedo, The Medallion, either of the lame Shangihai movies..

but... the WORST MA movie...

Best of the Best II.  I didn't think they could make a more craptastic movie than the first one... I was wrong. 

and just for the record, Berry Gordy's: the last dragon is in my top 5 favorite MA flicks...  and Only the Strong would be in the top 10...


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## Jim Tindell (Feb 23, 2005)

Jaymeister said:
			
		

> Mortal Kombat really sucked... But then again, so did the videogames it was based on


:xtrmshock


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## jjmcc (Feb 24, 2005)

OUMoose said:
			
		

> Unfortunately any of Jackie Chan's recent movies have been... poor...
> 
> The Tuxedo, The Medallion, either of the lame Shangihai movies..
> 
> ...


Now thats what i call taste but only the strong would be in my top 5


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## Sin (Feb 24, 2005)

you guys really don't see anything good in the matrix movies???


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## The Kai (Feb 24, 2005)

What the acting?, clue it starred Keanu Reeves.

The Philosophy?  Get out and read more
the 2nd one was really the worst and I could
'nt sit thru the 3rd one


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## The Kai (Feb 24, 2005)

The other total Bomb was Hero


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## relytjj (Feb 24, 2005)

Hero with Jet Li was painfully long. The plot and the characters abilities were ridiculous. I couldn't stand it when the characters were flying and jumping on water and such without explaination.


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## Kenpodoc (Feb 24, 2005)

I didn't like Hero as a martial arts film.  I did like it as an art film.  I enjoyed landscape, the use of color, the use of the camera to demonstrate point of view, and  the chinese conventions used in the story telling. 

I still say The Matrix was the worst.  The recent Jackie Chan movies have been terrible but at least they didn't pretend to be art. Mortal Combat was bad martial arts but it's amusing and makes me laugh.

Jeff


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## Kenpodoc (Feb 24, 2005)

Sin said:
			
		

> HOW DARE YOU
> 
> The matrix Trilogy was one of the movies that got me into MA, of course there is the fantasy, but a true MAist can see that there is a lot of good martial Arts in it.
> 
> Sho Lin Soccer, blows serious *** I didn't even watch it all


  
To each their own. My Kids love The Matrix.  I thought it was pretentious, but then I initial got into martial arts after watching  "Enter the Dragon" and I still love it despite its failings. For myself, Wire work ruins the martial art in films. I prefer to watch Jackie and Benny duke it out in real time.

Now I love Surf Ninjas as a martial arts movie and by any standard it blows.  I still watch it several times a year.

Jeff :asian:


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## Kenpodoc (Feb 24, 2005)

relytjj said:
			
		

> Hero with Jet Li was painfully long. The plot and the characters abilities were ridiculous. I couldn't stand it when the characters were flying and jumping on water and such without explaination.


The first time I saw this I thought it was painfully long.  I watched it again in a mellow mood and enjoyed the leisurely story line.

Jeff


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## The Kai (Feb 24, 2005)

_I prefer to watch Jackie and Benny duke it out in real time.

_Meals on Wheels--Best fight scene ever


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## OUMoose (Feb 24, 2005)

Sin said:
			
		

> you guys really don't see anything good in the matrix movies???


I enjoyed the existential questions from the first and second movies, and the fight scenes, albeit not fantasitc, were gravy. 

and to steal a line from Trimuph, the third movie was good... for me to poop on...


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## OC Kid (Feb 25, 2005)

Shaolin soccer and kung pao have got to be the worst butttt as a comedy (which they are meant to be) they definately are the funniest. 

Enter the ninja kinda sucked come on a ninja using a laser beam???? wazzup wit dat...

Other than american kick boxer 1 the rest really sucked......

most van dam movies and after above the law..most seagals movies sucked to......


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## masherdong (Feb 25, 2005)

The Last Dragon


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## Lynne (Jul 21, 2007)

Mark Weiser said:


> Oh I can not remember the name of this movie but it was a paradoy of several MA Movies.
> 
> The fight scene with the baby and the killer were priceless.
> 
> ...


Kung Pow:  Enter the Fist.  I saw that.  It was so stupid it was funny.  I think Steve Oedekerk is a genius though. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0240468/


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## The Elemental (Aug 2, 2007)

Sorry folks, but when it comes to *baaaaaaad* martial art flicks, none is worse than the ones my country makes, Egypt has made possibly some of the worst martial art movies ever!


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## Marginal (Aug 2, 2007)

The Elemental said:


> Sorry folks, but when it comes to *baaaaaaad* martial art flicks, none is worse than the ones my country makes, Egypt has made possibly some of the worst martial art movies ever!



http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1784919933698609814

Turkey steps up the the plate...


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## bydand (Aug 2, 2007)

Marginal said:


> http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1784919933698609814
> 
> Turkey steps up the the plate...



God help me I think I saw part of this movie before.


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