# Jesus to Appear in MMA Smackdown



## Bill Mattocks (Apr 7, 2009)

http://www.churchsolutionsmag.com/hotnews/easter-sermon-will-feature-ultimate-fighting.html




> As Easter is approaching, one pastor is preaching that Jesus is entering the Octagon, or the fighting venue for mixed martial artists in the Ultimate Fighting Championship.
> Spirit of St. Louis Church in Arnold, Mo., and its pastor, Tom Skiles, are branding this Sundays message as Easter in the Octagon: The Ultimate Fighter. The flier posted throughout the church and other areas notes that for so long Christians have been told they should be nice guys when in reality they should be ultimate fighters.
> For children, there will be an Easter Smack Down with an inflatable boxing ring.



http://blogs.riverfronttimes.com/da...imate_fighting_easter_jesus_didnt_tap_out.php



> _If Christ were a UFC fighter, which one would he be?_
> Hmm, I don't' know. I think he'd be a *Forest Griffin* type. Vicious but yet forgiving. I always make fun of people's images of Christ. The hippie Christ. The Chirst with the long flowing air, like he came straight from the salon. I make fun of that. I don't think he was that kind of man. *I think Jesus was a man's man*. Him and his disciples. I tell people they probably had teeth missing.


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## Nomad (Apr 7, 2009)

Ummm... wow.


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## Andy Moynihan (Apr 7, 2009)

Well, I'm not allowed to travel in Missouri since I voted 3rd party and all, so if one of you who live down there could mail me back *H*is autograph, that'd be sweeeeeet.


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## Gordon Nore (Apr 7, 2009)

Andy Moynihan said:


> ...so if one of you who live down there could mail me back *H*is autograph, that'd be sweeeeeet.


 
I'd make the trip and get a photo of myself and the Ultimate Savior to put on the dojo wall, right next to the Gracie and Chuck Norris pics.


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## Andy Moynihan (Apr 7, 2009)

Gordon Nore said:


> I'd make the trip and get a photo of myself and the Ultimate Savior to put on the dojo wall, right next to the Gracie and Chuck Norris pics.


 

Cool. Mail me back one too. That'd be sweeeeeet.


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## Tez3 (Apr 7, 2009)

http://www.fightclothing.co.uk/m8/Jesus+Didn't+Tap/index.html?gclid=CPu2gZLT35kCFRaA3godeC-cag

Here's the clothing to wear.


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## CoryKS (Apr 7, 2009)

Tez3 said:


> http://www.fightclothing.co.uk/m8/Jesus+Didn't+Tap/index.html?gclid=CPu2gZLT35kCFRaA3godeC-cag
> 
> Here's the clothing to wear.


 
I am SO glad you didn't link to Condom Depot.


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## Andrew Green (Apr 7, 2009)

CoryKS said:


> I am SO glad you didn't link to Condom Depot.




Holy condoms are just bad news.


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## crushing (Apr 7, 2009)

Tez3 said:


> http://www.fightclothing.co.uk/m8/Jesus+Didn't+Tap/index.html?gclid=CPu2gZLT35kCFRaA3godeC-cag
> 
> Here's the clothing to wear.


 

I was going to attempt an intelligent design on the Xyience name and promoting X-shot, but it started getting a bit thorny so I'll cross it off my list.


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## Andy Moynihan (Apr 7, 2009)

crushing said:


> I was going to attempt an intelligent design on the Xyience name and promoting X-shot, but it started getting a bit thorny so I'll cross it off my list.


 
'Twould be an excruciating endeavor indeed, the very scourge of the punster......


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## elder999 (Apr 7, 2009)

Tez3 said:


> http://www.fightclothing.co.uk/m8/Jesus+Didn't+Tap/index.html?gclid=CPu2gZLT35kCFRaA3godeC-cag
> 
> Here's the clothing to wear.


 
Uhm-*Jesus tapped:*



> *Matthew 26:29*, And he went a little farther, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying,_ O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt._


 
but the *REF* wanted "the match" to continue....


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## Tez3 (Apr 7, 2009)

elder999 said:


> Uhm-*Jesus tapped:*
> 
> 
> 
> but the *REF* wanted "the match" to continue....


 
Ref was hardly neutral though lol! 

Seems the clothing company is a Christian one, I found this, some of the comments seem to answer yours about whether Jesus tapped or not!

http://blog.mmawarehouse.com/2008/05/23/new-brand-jesus-didnt-tap/


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## Nolerama (Apr 7, 2009)

Andy, we can harbor your fugitive 3rd Party voting butt in STL City. You just have to assume a secret identity, and pretend to like toasted raviolis and Budweiser.

There's a local fighter here sponsored by Anointed Fighter

"Satans fighters are preparing for the ultimate show down against Gods Anointed Legion at the Eternity Fighting Championship-Judgment Day."

Talk about marketing directly to the psychographic.


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## Nolerama (Apr 7, 2009)

hmmm... I'm not doing anything Easter Sunday. I just might stop by and take some pictures.

Hopefully lightning, fire, or brimstone doesn't strike me as I walk through the doors.


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## CoryKS (Apr 8, 2009)

So what entry music would Jesus use?  Any suggestions?


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## Bill Mattocks (Apr 8, 2009)

CoryKS said:


> So what entry music would Jesus use?  Any suggestions?



"I'll be home for Christmas?"


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## Carol (Apr 8, 2009)

That might be a little too tame for the octagon crowd.

I'm thinking "Jesus Saves" or maybe even "Hell Awaits" by Slayer :uhyeah:


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## Nolerama (Apr 8, 2009)

I don't think this song has any relevance, but when I start thinking of Jesus' entry song....

I think of "We Didn't Start The Fire" by Billy Joel.

Live. Uncut.

And he would be really into the song... REALLY into it. Like the lyrics were like some sort of Bible to him.

And then I'd expect J-Christ to start off the match with a Superman punch... miss... then get caught in a crucifix.


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## Bill Mattocks (Apr 8, 2009)

I don't know why I didn't think of this one...






Jesus Christ, Superstar.  They could rock it up a little.

Or, failing that, "Crucify," by Tori Amos.  A little downbeat, though.

"Knockin' on Heaven's Door" covered by GNR?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqWnJgkwppI&feature=PlayList&p=9AB8A9D153C2FB51&index=0&playnext=1

Or Led Zeppelin - "Buying the Stairway to Heaven?"

"Dear God," by XTC?


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## CoryKS (Apr 8, 2009)

"I Am the Resurrection" - Stone Roses

"Hair of the Dog" - Nazareth :rofl:  (think Old Testament fire and brimstone)


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## jarrod (Apr 9, 2009)

anything by Nine Inch Nails.

jf


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## JBrainard (Apr 9, 2009)

Gordon Nore said:


> I'd make the trip and get a photo of myself and the Ultimate Savior to put on the dojo wall, right next to the Gracie and Chuck Norris pics.


 
Whatever... You can't put Chuck Norris and Jesus in the same catagory. Chuck could kick Jesus' *** any day of the week.


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## JBrainard (Apr 9, 2009)

jarrod said:


> anything by Nine Inch Nails.
> 
> jf


 
I don't get it... Oh wait, now I do. LMAO


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## Stac3y (Apr 9, 2009)

Trying to remember what music was used in the original South Park cartoon--the Jesus vs. Santa Claus one. Y'all remember that?


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## crushing (Apr 9, 2009)

Stac3y said:


> Trying to remember what music was used in the original South Park cartoon--the Jesus vs. Santa Claus one. Y'all remember that?


 
Mortal Kombat theme?


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