# What sets off your red flag? Spider Sense?



## Hawke (Jun 26, 2007)

From reading the other posts about listening to yourself or being aware I remembered a subjected I wanted to post.

What sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?

A stranger asking for direction? a cigarette? the time?
A group of men huddled together?
A group of men walking toward you?
A person with a nervous eyes?
A person hiding one or both hands?
A person hiding their face with a cap?
A person hiding behind a corner?


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## Bigshadow (Jun 26, 2007)

Hawke said:


> From reading the other posts about listening to yourself or being aware I remembered a subjected I wanted to post.
> 
> What sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?
> 
> ...




I am going to venture to say that most people don't know.  It just happens.  There isn't any one thing and it most often is not something they consciously remember.  IMO anyway.


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## Drac (Jun 26, 2007)

Hawke said:


> From reading the other posts about listening to yourself or being aware I remembered a subjected I wanted to post.
> 
> What sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?
> 
> ...


 
Depending on the location, weather and time of day, all of the above


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## 14 Kempo (Jun 26, 2007)

Bigshadow said:


> I am going to venture to say that most people don't know. It just happens. There isn't any one thing and it most often is not something they consciously remember. IMO anyway.


 
Although I pretty much agree here, there are definately things that can be seen in others that will give you an idea about thier demeaner. You will be able to get 'tells' on whether they are in a nervous or dominant state. If they won't make eye contact, that could be a sign.

It is true, however, that if these people are veterans at this sort of criminal activity, they may show no signs, have no 'tells'. In that sense, that little voice may be key to saving/protecting yourself.


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## Kacey (Jun 26, 2007)

I can't usually say - sometimes it's something fairly obvious, like being approached at a gas station by a man with a lit cigarette and no gas can, from a direction not visible by the attendant, asking for money (when I went in to tell the attendant, he called the police - turns out this guy had nearly set the station on fire panhandling in the past).  Most often, however, it is a subconscious compilation of clues that make me nervous and I can't explain why - unless something comes of it, and I can look back and identify what made me nervous before after the fact.  Even then, I can't always identify what caused it - I just pay attention to it.  Better to be cautious without need, than to not be cautious when I should be.


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## MA-Caver (Jun 26, 2007)

Hawke said:


> From reading the other posts about listening to yourself or being aware I remembered a subjected I wanted to post.
> 
> What sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?



Guys that ask "what sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?" 

Seriously... it depends on where I am, what I'm doing, who's around me? It rarely happens now-a-days to me but it's still there, just :idunno: comes up when it comes up. Different things can set it off. The things you listed, couple of guys walking down the street towards me several blocks away... I dunno man, sometimes I feel it way off sometimes right at the last second. But I do listen to it.


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## Bigshadow (Jun 26, 2007)

14 Kempo said:


> Although I pretty much agree here, there are definately things that can be seen in others that will give you an idea about thier demeaner. You will be able to get 'tells' on whether they are in a nervous or dominant state. If they won't make eye contact, that could be a sign.



I don't know if that would set off the senses, but it certainly will get my attention and cause me to be wary.


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## kidswarrior (Jun 26, 2007)

Hawke said:


> From reading the other posts about listening to yourself or being aware I remembered a subjected I wanted to post.
> 
> What sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?
> 
> ...


Yes, and anything else that might be a prelude to  something untoward.


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## thardey (Jun 26, 2007)

I'm reminded of the old saying about detecting counterfeit money: The best way to detect a fake is to be very familiar with the original. You're not looking for clues as to why something is fake -- you're instinctively familiar with what's normal, and you can accept or reject it. 

It's when something just doesn't "feel" right that I sort of wake up. So I train myself to be very familiar with the normal life around me, rather than always be looking for the unusual. 

It's the same feeling I use when I'm riding my motorcycle in heavy traffic. I don't watch every car and driver in the danger range -- I watch the flow of traffic, and then I can detect danger more quickly because it's not part of the normal flow. 

I guess I would rather spend my time watching for "originals" and assume anything else is a "counterfeit" until proven otherwise.


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## jks9199 (Jun 26, 2007)

Hawke said:


> From reading the other posts about listening to yourself or being aware I remembered a subjected I wanted to post.
> 
> What sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?
> 
> ...


Any, all, or none of the above.

What triggers me to a more alert status is the back of my head doing all sorts of figuring and calculus, then coming to the conclusion that "this" isn't right.  It's not the way things normally are... And if it's not normal -- there must be a reason.  It's subconcious reasoning, noting probably hundreds of details and comparing them against my experience and finding that they either do match a known dangerous combination -- or don't match the known safe ones.

Let's use a simple situation as an example.  A guy walks up to me, in a public area, and starts talking to me.  While I'm looking at him, and listening to him, and consciously going "What the hell does this yo-yo want with me?" -- another part of me is subconsciously noting how he's dressed and whether it's right for the area and the weather (a business suit in the Shenandoah National Park is as out of place as torn jeans and a stained flannel shirt is on Wall Street...), does what he's saying make sense, is the tone and rhythm right, do I smell alchol, weed or something else, and more...  All of that gets put together, and my hackles either raise or they don't.


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## tellner (Jun 26, 2007)

It depends so much on so many things, some of which are below the conscious level. But I'll give an example that should set of huge clanging alarms:

A group of young men with no women standing around together and not talking to each other.​


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## Fang (Jun 26, 2007)

Someone i dont know coming up to me with a smile and laying their hands on me in any way whatsoever.


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## fireman00 (Jun 26, 2007)

Hawke said:


> From reading the other posts about listening to yourself or being aware I remembered a subjected I wanted to post.
> 
> What sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?
> 
> ...



All of that and more.... its kind of a learned thing - actually a "re-learned" thing... go back a couple of thousand years and we were very good at recognizing danger signs and dealing with them - 'cuz if we didn't we'd have been eaten.   But thanks to the process of becoming  "civilized" we've learned to drop that mantel of protection.... we've been taught to be polite, not to ask embarrassing questions, not to snub someone, not to cross the street when we see someone that makes us nervous....   

Listen to that little voice in your head that yells out when something doesn't seem right - look around and pay attention to your surroundings - most times when something goes bad there are signs that you aren't pahying attention to.   

Gavin de Becker, who has written a number of books and runs a threat assessment consulting company,  wrote a book " The Gift of Fear" that deals with this very topic - its aimed at women and children but everyone can benefit from reading it.  

 A better description of his book from a reviewer on Amazon.com   "Perhaps we have a bad feeling about someone we've just met, or a little gnawing perception that a situation just doesn't "feel right," or perhaps even a fear that a co-worker might do something harmful. What de Becker, renowned expert on violent behavior, explains here is that instead of shrugging off these fears, we need to listen to them, see why we're having them, and act accordingly. Far from being silly intuitions, often these can truly show when something is wrong and violence might be imminent; if listened to, along with information about how violent people behave, these feelings might protect us from harm."


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## CuongNhuka (Jun 26, 2007)

Hawke said:


> From reading the other posts about listening to yourself or being aware I remembered a subjected I wanted to post.
> 
> What sets off your danger signal? What do you look out for?
> 
> ...


 
All of the abouve. Add Thardey, JKS9199, and Fang. And if there's a minium of traffic in the area, my spidey senses really go off. And then I covertly pull a pen out of my pocket and get ready to have to use it.
Which becomes the next quesiton. What do you do to, sorta, prepare for when your danger sense goes off?


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## tellner (Jun 27, 2007)

tellner said:


> It depends so much on so many things, some of which are below the conscious level. But I'll give an example that should set of huge clanging alarms:
> A group of young men with no women standing around together and not talking to each other.​



The interesting thing about this is how it related to our older Shepherd, Papillon, back when she was just a puppy. 

She's normally Ms. Canine Personality I Love Everyone And You're Next Except For The Mailman And Parcel Packing Pete. But one night when she was about six months old I took her out to do her business before putting her to bed. There was a bunch of guys exactly as described. She started bristling, barking, growling and pricking her usually floppy ears straight up. The first words out of their mouths were "Killer dog, dude!" I said something like "Heel, Fang!" When we got back inside she lay down in front at the door facing out until they went away.


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## Hawke (Jun 27, 2007)

Good advice and tips to consider.

Yes I am currently reading _The Gift of Fear_.  I had this book for awhile and totally forgot about until I had to repack.

Someone asked, "What do you do when your spidey sense goes off?"  I listen to my little voice which is usually get out of there.

Thanks to all who contributed.  Hopefully others will benefit as well.  You guys made me think of things I have not considered.  The best way to know a phoney is to know the real deal.  I was with a youth pastor who said the same thing to kids.

Thanks again for taking the time to contribute.:asian:


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## LawDog (Jun 27, 2007)

Body language, how it changes as his & your proximity changes.
Verbal language, use of certain types of lead in questions/statements.
Suroundings, are others around your location starting to focus in on you?
Eyes, is he watching you with his "off center" vison?


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## Drac (Jun 27, 2007)

LawDog said:


> Body language, how it changes as his & your proximity changes.
> Verbal language, use of certain types of lead in questions/statements.
> Suroundings, are others around your location starting to focus in on you?
> Eyes, is he watching you with his "off center" vison?


 
If they want to know all about "spider sense" let them spend a few years on night shift doing bldg searchs or making traffic stops..


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## LawDog (Jun 27, 2007)

Best training ground that money can buy.
:apv:


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## Drac (Jun 27, 2007)

LawDog said:


> Best training ground that money can buy.
> :apv:


 

It also provide the real meaning of pucker factor..


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## stephen (Jun 29, 2007)

Distance.


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## jks9199 (Jun 29, 2007)

Drac said:


> If they want to know all about "spider sense" let them spend a few years on night shift doing bldg searchs or making traffic stops..


Yep...

There's no substitute for experience in reading people and situations.


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## Darth F.Takeda (Jun 30, 2007)

Hawke said:


> Good advice and tips to consider.
> 
> Yes I am currently reading _The Gift of Fear_. I had this book for awhile and totally forgot about until I had to repack.
> 
> ...


 
Gates Of Fire is an excellent book and is a better resource for martial mindset, even being fiction, than alot of "Experts" books on the subject.
 The opposite of fear is love, and it's the reason to stow your fear and do what must be done.
 The part about giving in to possesion is also a good point, going to far, doing things out of pure cruelity can lead to ones downfall.


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## TheOriginalName (Jul 1, 2007)

thardey said:


> I'm reminded of the old saying about detecting counterfeit money: The best way to detect a fake is to be very familiar with the original. You're not looking for clues as to why something is fake -- you're instinctively familiar with what's normal, and you can accept or reject it.
> 
> It's when something just doesn't "feel" right that I sort of wake up. So I train myself to be very familiar with the normal life around me, rather than always be looking for the unusual.
> 
> ...


 
Now that is what i call wisdom


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