# Newbie to forum



## Rhea (Dec 16, 2015)

Hello,

I'm new to the forum.
I've been practicing in my chosen area of martial arts for quite a few years.
Recently moved clubs, for a number of reasons.
I'm hoping to find some like minded people here who are kind, and understand that everyone's priorities are different, and no ones are incorrect (part of the reason why I moved clubs, my attitude of 'I do this because I enjoy it, but I also have many other hobbies and commitments' was incorrect in the eyes of others with the attitudes of 'Martial arts is a lifestyle/religion, you should only have this as your priority').

Rhea


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## Brian R. VanCise (Dec 16, 2015)

Welcome to MartialTalk!


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## Bill Mattocks (Dec 16, 2015)

Rhea said:


> Hello,
> 
> I'm new to the forum.
> I've been practicing in my chosen area of martial arts for quite a few years.
> ...



Welcome to MT!


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## Dirty Dog (Dec 16, 2015)

Welcome to MartialTalk. Hope you enjoy it.


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## Rhea (Dec 16, 2015)

Brian R. VanCise said:


> Welcome to MartialTalk!





Bill Mattocks said:


> Welcome to MT!





Dirty Dog said:


> Welcome to MartialTalk. Hope you enjoy it.



Thank you.


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## Jenna (Dec 16, 2015)

Rhea said:


> Hello,
> 
> I'm new to the forum.
> I've been practicing in my chosen area of martial arts for quite a few years.
> ...


howdy, welcome aboard, it is nice to have you here. So what is it you enjoy about your martial art as a hobby? x


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## Tony Dismukes (Dec 16, 2015)

Welcome to MartialTalk! What style(s) of martial arts do you practice?


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## SahBumNimRush (Dec 16, 2015)

Welcome to MT Rhea, I look forward to seeing you in the discussion threads!


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## Rhea (Dec 16, 2015)

Jenna said:


> howdy, welcome aboard, it is nice to have you here. So what is it you enjoy about your martial art as a hobby? x



Hi 
I enjoy being able to excersize and learn something at the same time. I started because I just couldn't find the will power to go to a gym and run/cycle for an hour.
Over quite a few months the atmosphere at the previous club changed and became very negative and it began to impact on me.

Things happened in my life that meant I had to cut down on training for a little while. I found myself more on the negative side of instructors due their belief I lacked commitment.

I was going to give up, but decided to try a new club. I was so nevous, as the previous instructors had been very disparaging about other clubs and styles, and frequently openly criticised students who had left as quitters that did not have commitment.
I loved it; it was like being a newbie all over again. Everyone was welcoming, smiling and the atmosphere was so light at the same time everyone trying their best.
I came out of the first class smiling, happy and with a bit of praise about my technique and constructive feedback about things I need to change.

The response I got back from the previous club when I let them know I did not wish to return was the final straw.
I've got a lot to learn, very different style and very different atmosphere. It's clear i've learnt to always be anxious and on edge, that I am always performing a routine incorrectly, but I can't wait to learn and develop, even if in the view of the old place that i am the worst of the worst, a quitter whos also a traitor.


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## Rhea (Dec 16, 2015)

Tony Dismukes said:


> Welcome to MartialTalk! What style(s) of martial arts do you practice?


Hi. 
At the moment I'm not comfortable saying what I practice. 
I'm sure that seems silly, but I've developed a lot of anxiety that I need to work through. The previous club was so negative and horrid about both past and current students that i dont want anyone who may recognise me to find me on here. Even though I left, and joined a club with a different afflilation, I think it will take me a while to realise this.


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## Buka (Dec 16, 2015)

Welcome aboard, Rhea.

I feel for you. The first place I trained was a bit odd as well. Good luck going forward.


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## Touch Of Death (Dec 16, 2015)

Rhea said:


> Hello,
> 
> I'm new to the forum.
> I've been practicing in my chosen area of martial arts for quite a few years.
> ...


Hi Rhea.


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## Jenna (Dec 17, 2015)

Rhea said:


> Hi
> I enjoy being able to excersize and learn something at the same time. I started because I just couldn't find the will power to go to a gym and run/cycle for an hour.
> Over quite a few months the atmosphere at the previous club changed and became very negative and it began to impact on me.
> 
> ...


Ciao bella, I am glad you posted as I know from previous postings -check around here for your self- other people have been in your situation also and had many of the same thoughts like feeling in a way traitorous.  And so good on you, it is encouraging to know it is working out better for you and would be good if you were some time of the mind to tell and to hear how you took the decision to start afresh, could help others in that situation you were in, wishes x.


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## oftheherd1 (Dec 17, 2015)

Welcome to MT.

Looking forward to the time you can feel more comfortable both in your new dojang and on MT.  Hope you like it here.


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## Kenpoguy123 (Dec 18, 2015)

Rhea said:


> Hello,
> 
> I'm new to the forum.
> I've been practicing in my chosen area of martial arts for quite a few years.
> ...


Welcome and I agree about what you say. The club I train at and help to teach has the same sort of attitude that you always have to be there and if you can't be there you have to give them 24 hours notice. If other instructors don't turn up for legitmet they talk crap behind their backs. I hate that, teaching isn't a job we don't get paid for it we volunteer there should be no pressure to be there when you can't. Martial arts are a hobby you do because you want to do it not because some guy with a massive ego thinks your his employees and we owe them


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## Rhea (Dec 18, 2015)

oftheherd1 said:


> Welcome to MT.
> 
> Looking forward to the time you can feel more comfortable both in your new dojang and on MT.  Hope you like it here.


Thank you


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## Rhea (Dec 18, 2015)

Jenna said:


> Ciao bella, I am glad you posted as I know from previous postings -check around here for your self- other people have been in your situation also and had many of the same thoughts like feeling in a way traitorous.  And so good on you, it is encouraging to know it is working out better for you and would be good if you were some time of the mind to tell and to hear how you took the decision to start afresh, could help others in that situation you were in, wishes x.


I'm both glad and sad to hear that I am not alone with the attitude and difficulties I faced at one club. 
I hope once I find my feet and confidence I can share more of my journey and help anyone else who finds themselves like I did.


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## Rhea (Dec 18, 2015)

Kenpoguy123 said:


> Welcome and I agree about what you say. The club I train at and help to teach has the same sort of attitude that you always have to be there and if you can't be there you have to give them 24 hours notice. If other instructors don't turn up for legitmet they talk crap behind their backs. I hate that, teaching isn't a job we don't get paid for it we volunteer there should be no pressure to be there when you can't. Martial arts are a hobby you do because you want to do it not because some guy with a massive ego thinks your his employees and we owe them



It sounds similar to my old club. If you didnt give enough notice you couldn't attend you were bad mouthed in class, even if you did give enough notice often the reason you wouldn't be there would be challenged (e.g. choosing to attend a family party rather than train would be critisied in front of the student in front of the whole class, this happened to me quite a few times, with one occasion the instructor having almost a tantrum and cancelling next weeks lesson for all the class because I had chosen to celebrate a friends birthday instead of training). 

There were a couple of times I was asked suddenly to lead the class, because the instructor was busy complaining about the previous class to someone else. I felt very uncomfortable doing this as I had no pre warning, I was not an instructor and I paid to train.


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## Kenpoguy123 (Dec 18, 2015)

Rhea said:


> It sounds similar to my old club. If you didnt give enough notice you couldn't attend you were bad mouthed in class, even if you did give enough notice often the reason you wouldn't be there would be challenged (e.g. choosing to attend a family party rather than train would be critisied in front of the student in front of the whole class, this happened to me quite a few times, with one occasion the instructor having almost a tantrum and cancelling next weeks lesson for all the class because I had chosen to celebrate a friends birthday instead of training).
> 
> There were a couple of times I was asked suddenly to lead the class, because the instructor was busy complaining about the previous class to someone else. I felt very uncomfortable doing this as I had no pre warning, I was not an instructor and I paid to train.


Ah well mine wasnt that bad that they cancelled the class but still yeah it's stupid like that. One time they got me to take the class while they all had a chat in the back room about non club stuff. But hey I did it and they wanted me to take the sparring so I did and I know I didn't do an amazing job at it but I've never taught sparring in my life and they had a go afterwards saying it was unorganised well guess what I'm not a black belt I haven't done it before and I had to lead it on my own maybe if the real instructors got off their *** and taught there wouldn't be a problem


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## donald1 (Dec 18, 2015)

Hello...






Don't worry, everybody does things or says things incorrectly from time to time . Sometimes constantly. Its only a bad thing if you don't learn from it... that or when you look across the room and see your instructor glare at you with a angry, frustrated and possibly disappointed look on his face. (I know I've gotten that look a couple times...)


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## Tony Dismukes (Dec 18, 2015)

Rhea said:


> It sounds similar to my old club. If you didnt give enough notice you couldn't attend you were bad mouthed in class, even if you did give enough notice often the reason you wouldn't be there would be challenged (e.g. choosing to attend a family party rather than train would be critisied in front of the student in front of the whole class, this happened to me quite a few times, with one occasion the instructor having almost a tantrum and cancelling next weeks lesson for all the class because I had chosen to celebrate a friends birthday instead of training).
> 
> There were a couple of times I was asked suddenly to lead the class, because the instructor was busy complaining about the previous class to someone else. I felt very uncomfortable doing this as I had no pre warning, I was not an instructor and I paid to train.


That's not a martial arts school. That's a wannabee cult run by a whiny narcissist.



Kenpoguy123 said:


> Ah well mine wasnt that bad that they cancelled the class but still yeah it's stupid like that. One time they got me to take the class while they all had a chat in the back room about non club stuff. But hey I did it and they wanted me to take the sparring so I did and I know I didn't do an amazing job at it but I've never taught sparring in my life and they had a go afterwards saying it was unorganised well guess what I'm not a black belt I haven't done it before and I had to lead it on my own maybe if the real instructors got off their *** and taught there wouldn't be a problem



That's just unprofessional.


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## Drew Ahn-Kim (Jan 3, 2016)

Aloha and Welcome!  I to am a newbie here, but I'm already overwhelmed by the wealth of knowledge across so many different disciplines and skill levels here.  

Finding a good club, instructor/master, and students is perhaps one of the most important things in determining your overall experience with whatever your art of choice is.  A lot of us have been there, and I'm so glad you recognized it rather then just staying there and being miserable or thinking that's the way all clubs are.  I look forward too your input in this community and seeing your growth without whatever it is you decide to do.

You're already taking steps that so many merely think about taking but never do.


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