# BJJ adults and minors mix class



## Goat (Sep 14, 2021)

Hi guys,

I have no much experience in any martial arts but I started BJJ few months ago and I am really enjoying it.

My dilemma is recently 2 little girls have joined our class and I am terrorised they will ask me to roll with them as they asked other adults. The coach told me they are 14 yrs old but I doubt it as they look more like my 10 yrs old.

As I am a beginner myself I am so worried to hurt them plus they are minors and I don't like the idea of rolling on a floor with a minor. My job doesn't help with these issues as I am very aware of no putting myself in uncomfortable situations.

I really don't want offend anyone I am just trying to understand if I am overreacting or not.

Thanks for anyone who would like to answer me.


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## Dirty Dog (Sep 15, 2021)

Short version: if you're not comfortable rolling with them, then don't do it.


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## isshinryuronin (Sep 15, 2021)

You're not overreacting at all.  It's a valid concern.  I take it you're a male, worried about rolling about on the mat, intertwining your body around that of a 14 year old girl.  What could go wrong with that?  Your hand presses/brushes against a female part as you're rolling and she mentions that to her mom....  I think I'd pass on that particular workout partner.  IMO it's a risk you and the gym owner should think twice about.  BTW, what do the girl's parents think about this?


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## Dirty Dog (Sep 15, 2021)

isshinryuronin said:


> You're not overreacting at all.  It's a valid concern.  I take it you're a male, worried about rolling about on the mat, intertwining your body around that of a 14 year old girl.  What could go wrong with that?  Your hand presses/brushes against a female part as you're rolling and she mentions that to her mom....  I think I'd pass on that particular workout partner.  IMO it's a risk you and the gym owner should think twice about.  BTW, what do the girl's parents think about this?


I agree it's something to be approached with caution. I've trained a lot of teenagers, and if it's to be done, then there needs to be a frank and open talk.


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## Goat (Sep 15, 2021)

isshinryuronin said:


> You're not overreacting at all.  It's a valid concern.  I take it you're a male, worried about rolling about on the mat, intertwining your body around that of a 14 year old girl.  What could go wrong with that?  Your hand presses/brushes against a female part as you're rolling and she mentions that to her mom....  I think I'd pass on that particular workout partner.  IMO it's a risk you and the gym owner should think twice about.  BTW, what do the girl's parents think about this?



I'll ask the dad next time I'll see him as he trains with us too. 

On day 1 the two girls were rolling together so I had no issues and thought that was the deal but yesterday they wanted to put them with someone more experience and they mixed them with an adult female and an adult male.


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## drop bear (Sep 15, 2021)

Rolling with kids is really good for your transitions because you have to do everything without putting a heap of weight on them.


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## dunc (Sep 15, 2021)

Rolling with smaller people and kids can be good training because you need to remove any pressure from your game and play light and mobile
However, personally I would not recommend rolling with underage folk that you don’t have a personal connection too
There’s a reasonable risk that things could be misinterpreted or perhaps something someone else does causes issues etc etc
It’s fine for the kids to roll together in an adult class and ideally the parents and instructor can either find other kids to come and join in or the parents need to step on the mats themselves (which is actually a great way to bond with your teenage kids IME)


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## Buka (Sep 15, 2021)

It depends on the dojo, the instructors and the roll. I enjoyed rolling with the kids if their parents were there, up close and interested.


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## john_newman (Sep 16, 2021)

For the beginning, this is the best part BrO...


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## Cynik75 (Sep 17, 2021)

A few years ago 8 year kid was training with us (experienced level adult bjj class) for two years. His father was USA citizen with  contact job in Poland and our gym and training hour were the most comfortable for family. He had some experience from USA with wrestling. We treat him light but we changed him into terminator. You should saw him during child competition - up to 13 years kids were only toys for him. He was used to spar with two, three times heavier partners with full force he could generate and his competition opponents from kids-only class were not even close to him.

Back to the opening theme: first time kid, busty teenage girl (or whoever you can feel uncomfortable rolling with) will submit you you will forget about age, gender etc. He/she will became just sparring partner - when sexy girl will choke you with triangle you will not think "nice, my head is between her thighs" but "f....., I need to escape".
During nearly 16 years of BJJ I was in probably all Kamasutra positions rolling with teen girls and young women -but the was no the smallest trace of erotism in this. Sparring partner has skills, weight, size, speed, strenght etc. but has no gender.

The main problem with bjj is that when you do to bed with your girlfriend you always want to pass the guard or escape from the mount...


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## Cynik75 (Sep 18, 2021)

And if you have sex-problem with bjj:


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## jks9199 (Sep 18, 2021)

Goat said:


> Hi guys,
> 
> I have no much experience in any martial arts but I started BJJ few months ago and I am really enjoying it.
> 
> ...


If you're uncomfortable rolling with them, whether due to age, gender, or relative sizes and concerns for everyone's safety on various levels...  simply politely say "no."  You should be free to say no to anyone in the class, for whatever reason.


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## WaterGal (Sep 20, 2021)

I think it's fine for teenagers to be in the same class as adults, as long as they're willing to be mature and act like young adults. However, when it comes to grappling, I think in general they should work with other teenagers or with adults of the same gender.

I've ended up working with teenage boys before, because we were about the same size, and one time a 14-year boy accidentally groped me while going for an arm lock and then got so embarrassed about it that he almost fled the class. 

Now, since that was a minor accidentally groping an adult, it was viewed as funny/awkward, but if it were the other way around, it might be seen as suspicious and potentially predatory. So I think it's reasonable to be concerned about working with them. If you don't feel comfortable grappling with them, then if they ask, you can turn them down. It's okay.


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## Martial D (Sep 20, 2021)

Goat said:


> Hi guys,
> 
> I have no much experience in any martial arts but I started BJJ few months ago and I am really enjoying it.
> 
> ...


At one of my old clubs we actually had a pervo dude that was touching ladies, some underage during rolling. It was never so overt as to be noticable but a lot complained about it. He was kicked out.


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