# The Advice Column Returns!



## WilliamTLear (Mar 8, 2003)

After much thought and debate, Michael Seigel and I have decided to restart our very own advice column again, right here in the Martial Talk Locker room. Again, we will occassionally ask others to be guest advisors. You ask, we advise. Now the disclaimer, we do not warrant or guarantee or answers in any way shape or form. Our opinions are those of the poster and no one else's. We do not promise that our answers will be either good or serious.


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## Seig (Mar 8, 2003)

When urinating up a rope, make sure you are wearing a shower cap and have an umbrella.


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## WilliamTLear (Mar 8, 2003)

Don't pee down my back and tell me it's raining!


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## WilliamTLear (Mar 8, 2003)

What's the difference between your run of the mill keyboard warrior, and an armchair Kenpoist?


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## Seig (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by WilliamTLear _
> *What's the difference between your run of the mill keyboard warrior, and an armchair Kenpoist? *


about 50 pounds.


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## Master of Blades (Mar 8, 2003)

Some ******* (Wont mention any names) keeps giving me *Boots to the Groin*. What do I do?


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Some ******* (Wont mention any names) keeps giving me *Boots to the Groin*. What do I do?  *



Take 'em like a man!!!!  sorry Seig, I had to get another shot in on this guy.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Take 'em like a man!!!!  sorry Seig, I had to get another shot in on this guy. *




JF,

He might not be able to take it like a man since he is still a little boy  

(* I had to get one in on him also *)


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *JF,
> 
> He might not be able to take it like a man since he is still a little boy  *



True very True


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## Kirk (Mar 8, 2003)

If God can do anything...can he make a rock so heavy that even
HE can't pick it up?


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

How do you meet, a nice girl who is rigt for you?

I have already done the dating service, and been introduced to all my friends and family single friends. .

I am still casually looking and flirting. 

Just curious, if you had any additional Ideas?

Thanks
:asian:


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## pesilat (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *How do you meet, a nice girl who is rigt for you?
> 
> I have already done the dating service, and been introduced to all my friends and family single friends. .
> ...



Stop looking  It worked for me. I went into full "slut mode." I wasn't looking for a relationship at all. I was just "playing the field." Then, when I wasn't looking for it *at all*, I met the woman who later became my wife. And, as far as I'm concerned, she's the best woman in the world for me. We've been together for 8 years now, and married for 6.

Mike


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## Cthulhu (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by WilliamTLear _
> *Don't pee down my back and tell me it's raining! *



Ah, one of my favorite lines from The Outlaw Josie Wales.

Cthulhu


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## Master of Blades (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *JF,
> 
> He might not be able to take it like a man since he is still a little boy
> ...



Your all so evil to me  But Rich considering I have a girl and Jason I'm taller then you I dont mind. You know why.....Because Im one up on both of you


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## WilliamTLear (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Kirk _
> *If God can do anything...can he make a rock so heavy that even
> HE can't pick it up? *



If god took a dump, and it came out like a rock, he probably wouldn't want to pick it up... Kinda makes you wonder where rocks come from, eh?


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## WilliamTLear (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Your all so evil to me  But Rich considering I have a girl and Jason I'm taller then you I dont mind. You know why.....Because Im one up on both of you  *



I didn't know that they stacked crap that high...

Just kidding of course,
Billy


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## Master of Blades (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by WilliamTLear _
> *If god took a dump, and it came out like a rock, he probably wouldn't want to pick it up... Kinda makes you wonder where rocks come from, eh? *



Not really........theres a scientifical explanation for that :asian:


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## WilliamTLear (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *How do you meet, a nice girl who is rigt for you?
> 
> I have already done the dating service, and been introduced to all my friends and family single friends. .
> ...



Go hang out at bars... after knocking a few back, they all seem to be "THE RIGHT GIRL".

:asian:


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## pesilat (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Not really........theres a scientifical explanation for that :asian: *



Ahh, but it does bring up the question of, "Can God's turds smell like anything he wants them to? And, if so, is that why roses smell so good even though they're fertilized with turds?"

Mike


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## Master of Blades (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by pesilat _
> *Ahh, but it does bring up the question of, "Can God's turds smell like anything he wants them to? And, if so, is that why roses smell so good even though they're fertilized with turds?"
> 
> Mike *



You didnt need to confuse me to get me to shut up


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## pesilat (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *You didnt need to confuse me to get me to shut up  *



 Bet you didn't know I had a PHD ("Piled Higher and Deeper"), did ya?

Mike


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## Master of Blades (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by pesilat _
> * Bet you didn't know I had a PHD ("Piled Higher and Deeper"), did ya?
> 
> Mike *



Nope I didnt, guess that makes you a wise man and not a wise guy


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## pesilat (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Nope I didnt, guess that makes you a wise man and not a wise guy  *



LOL. I think that would depend on who you ask 

Mike


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## Master of Blades (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by pesilat _
> *LOL. I think that would depend on who you ask
> 
> Mike *



Hmmm......okay

*Shouts*

RICH!!!!!!!!! Is Pesilat a Wise GUY or Wise MAN? :asian: 

:rofl:


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *...and Jason I'm taller then you I dont mind. You know why.....Because Im one up on both of you  *



Tisk, Tisk young one. You may have height on me however on the mat is a different story. The weight room whichever you prefer.


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## Seig (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Some ******* (Wont mention any names) keeps giving me *Boots to the Groin*. What do I do?  *


Kiai on impact and then in a loud, bold voice (albeit a little higher) say, "Please, Sir, may I have another?"


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## Seig (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Kirk _
> *If God can do anything...can he make a rock so heavy that even
> HE can't pick it up? *


AS we all know, God is Jewish.  What this means is that he would create such a rock and say, "I have children, why should I lift this rock?"


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## Seig (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *How do you meet, a nice girl who is rigt for you?
> 
> I have already done the dating service, and been introduced to all my friends and family single friends. .
> ...


Mail order, but make sure you use your Master Card with purchase protection.  You can still return it that way within 90 days if it is defective.  You might also be able to get an extended warranty


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## Seig (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by pesilat _
> *Ahh, but it does bring up the question of, "Can God's turds smell like anything he wants them to? And, if so, is that why roses smell so good even though they're fertilized with turds?"
> 
> Mike *


No they smell so good because they yse their own air freshener because they do not like the smell of turds either.


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## Seig (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *You didnt need to confuse me to get me to shut up  *


Obviously that didn't work either


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## Seig (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Hmmm......okay
> 
> *Shouts*
> ...


This is not Rich's column, it is mine and Bill's


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by WilliamTLear _
> *Go hang out at bars... after knocking a few back, they all seem to be "THE RIGHT GIRL".
> 
> :asian: *




Hmmm Bill, this works for the RIght Now Girl, yet this does nothing for the long term Right Girl.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by pesilat _
> *Stop looking  It worked for me. I went into full "slut mode." I wasn't looking for a relationship at all. I was just "playing the field." Then, when I wasn't looking for it at all, I met the woman who later became my wife. And, as far as I'm concerned, she's the best woman in the world for me. We've been together for 8 years now, and married for 6.
> 
> Mike *




Mike,

Thanks, seriously I am not seriously looking, just keeping my eyes open.  :shrug:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Your all so evil to me  But Rich considering I have a girl and Jason I'm taller then you I dont mind. You know why.....Because Im one up on both of you  *





True MOB, you have a girl. I am trying to meet a women


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Hmmm......okay
> 
> *Shouts*
> ...




Since this is Seig and Bill's thread I will let them answer, yet I would assume he is a Wise Man, and the Wise Guy heritage is for him to disclose if he wishes.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *Mail order, but make sure you use your Master Card with purchase protection.  You can still return it that way within 90 days if it is defective.  You might also be able to get an extended warranty *




Seig,

Which Catalog do you suggest?  The Russian or the South East Asian?


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Which Catalog do you suggest?  The Russian or the South East Asian?*



For the unofficial answer (and since your a friend) go with the asian.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *For the unofficial answer (and since your a friend) go with the asian. *



Reminds me of a joke.

A little off color, so I will tell you later. 


It wasn't me


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Reminds me of a joke.
> 
> A little off color*



Oh no, you have another one of those :rofl:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Oh no, you have another one of those :rofl: *



Check your PM


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Check your PM
> 
> *




I sent you a reply.


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## Master of Blades (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *True MOB, you have a girl. I am trying to meet a women  *



Well thank god for that........least we know your a not a pedophile  



> Obviously that didn't work either



Well you know me :asian: OR do you..........


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Well thank god for that........least we know your a not a pedophile  *



Shew! I'm glad we cleared that up. I asked Rich over for dinner, I should have had a little back ground check first. :rofl:  j/k Rich.


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## Seig (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Seig,
> 
> Which Catalog do you suggest?  The Russian or the South East Asian?
> ...


Well, that is will be a matter of personal taste.  I knew a guy who actually did this, ordered a wife from Russia.  Turned out she was a premiere laser eye surgeon......


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## Seig (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Well thank god for that........least we know your a not a pedophile
> 
> 
> ...


I know you well enough to believe that your "girl" is a much worn copy of a page 8 girl you have stuffed under your mattress.


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## Seig (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Shew! I'm glad we cleared that up. I asked Rich over for dinner, I should have had a little back ground check first. :rofl:  j/k Rich. *


I know a good PI.  He can do B/R checks.......


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> * I knew a guy who actually did this, ordered a wife from Russia.  Turned out she was a premiere laser eye surgeon...... *



Perfect!!!!!!,      I wish I signed up for that:rofl: :rofl:


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## Seig (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Perfect!!!!!!,      I wish I signed up for that:rofl: :rofl: *


The down side of that was that she had to spend 6 months a year for 10 years in Russia doing that job for them.  It was the only way they would let her leave.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Shew! I'm glad we cleared that up. I asked Rich over for dinner, I should have had a little back ground check first. :rofl:  j/k Rich. *




JF,

Background Check, SHHHH, just do not ask the the federalies, or I might have to hurt you or disapear  

:rofl: 

That was funny JF!


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *Well, that is will be a matter of personal taste.  I knew a guy who actually did this, ordered a wife from Russia.  Turned out she was a premiere laser eye surgeon...... *




Hmmmm, now if I could get a female officer from teh Russian Army who knew Systema and was an engineer or doctor also. That would be really nice. I think I might answer some of the e-mails and ask for a catalog   :rofl:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *I know you well enough to believe that your "girl" is a much worn copy of a page 8 girl you have stuffed under your mattress. *




Ouch! Page 8!

Not even a Page Three (3) Girl!   

That must be tough. :shrug: 

:rofl:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *I know a good PI.  He can do B/R checks....... *




Seig,

Brother, Cousin, Family Member, what you doing to me? It isnot the time for this yet. "There can only be one" 

:shrug: 

It hurts me when you speak like this.  



:rofl:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *The down side of that was that she had to spend 6 months a year for 10 years in Russia doing that job for them.  It was the only way they would let her leave. *




You mean I also get 6 months off for good behavior as well!   



Wow I really am intrigued now.


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## Master of Blades (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Ouch! Page 8!
> 
> Not even a Page Three (3) Girl!
> ...



Hey I aint picky......:shrug: Least shes in a newspaper :asian:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Hey I aint picky......:shrug: Least shes in a newspaper :asian: *




Ummm MOB,

We were talking about you!

Just to let you know. I think you have misunderstood somewhere in the translation.


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## Master of Blades (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Ummm MOB,
> 
> We were talking about you!
> ...



Stop confusing me!!!!! :wah:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Stop confusing me!!!!! :wah: *




Yes it is getting too easy.

I may have to give you a break.


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## Master of Blades (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Yes it is getting too easy.
> 
> I may have to give you a break.  *



I want a KitKat :shrug:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *I want a KitKat :shrug: *



This is the advice column not he word association thread, you really need to train more and rest your eyes and brain


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## Master of Blades (Mar 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *This is the advice column not he word association thread, you really need to train more and rest your eyes and brain  *



Its very true......only problem is this bloody British weather thread is so annoying, its been BOILING at night time and then raining all day  Cant get to sleep :wah:


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## Seig (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Seig,
> 
> Brother, Cousin, Family Member, what you doing to me? It isnot the time for this yet. "There can only be one"
> ...


Sorry, got a "head" of myself.....


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## Seig (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *You mean I also get 6 months off for good behavior as well!
> 
> 
> ...


Never looked at it that way....


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## Seig (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Hey I aint picky......:shrug: Least shes in a newspaper :asian: *


Now all he has to do is actually meet one.


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## Seig (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *
> I may have to give you a break.  *


or a _*Boot to the Groin*_


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## Seig (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Its very true......only problem is this bloody British weather thread is so annoying, its been BOILING at night time and then raining all day  Cant get to sleep :wah: *


Nobody told you that you had to live in Britain.


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## Master of Blades (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *Nobody told you that you had to live in Britain. *



You gonna give me the money to move? :shrug:


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *You gonna give me the money to move? :shrug: *



Huh, Another life lesson you are going to have to learn here. You must earn the money yourself.:shrug:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *You gonna give me the money to move? :shrug: *




You want to give yourself the money.

If you do not do it for yourself you will not respect the work it took to accomplish the task at hand.  

So, go to school and get good grades and then apply to a US college!  

I hear some American girls like British accents.


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *I hear some American girls like British accents.  *



Is that all it takes?  No wonder I kept getting turned down for dates. I just thought it was because I was pueny, and short....:rofl:


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## Kirk (Mar 10, 2003)

How do I get my TRS-80 "coco" mod 1 connected to the internet,
on my broadband line?


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## cali_tkdbruin (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *Kiai on impact and then in a loud, bold voice (albeit a little higher) say, "Please, Sir, may I have another?" *



OUCHY!!!  :erg:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 10, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Kirk _
> *How do I get my TRS-80 "coco" mod 1 connected to the internet,
> on my broadband line? *




Well if you insist, then have it conencted to a Loca Area Network and have a separate computer act as the gateway to the high speed  broad band lines.


Otherwise, send it to a museum


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## Seig (Mar 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Is that all it takes?  No wonder I kept getting turned down for dates. I just thought it was because I was pueny, and short....:rofl: *


and married with children....


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## Seig (Mar 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Kirk _
> *How do I get my TRS-80 "coco" mod 1 connected to the internet,
> on my broadband line? *


The good ole trash 80, well, if you have a router, uplink it to a hub, put a NIC in the trash 80 and then patch it to your hub. *OR* take a hammer to it until it fits in the phone jack.


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## JDenz (Mar 11, 2003)

Don't eat yellow snow


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *and married with children.... *



Oh man, I love that show.   However Nickelodeon and tv land took it off of their evening viewing hrs.   I'm not sure who the idiot was that did that but it sure did make me angry.:soapbox:


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## Master of Blades (Mar 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by JDenz _
> *Don't eat yellow snow *



Thanks for that.......I'll keep that in mind WHEN IT SNOWS AGAIN :rofl:


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Thanks for that.......I'll keep that in mind WHEN IT SNOWS AGAIN :rofl: *



We thought that we had to tell you this info. 'cause you might have actually tried it.:rofl:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *We thought that we had to tell you this info. 'cause you might have actually tried it.:rofl: *



True, he might have tried it.


Also do not pet flaming poodles! 
 :rofl:


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## JDenz (Mar 11, 2003)

sounds like we have some Warcraft 2 players


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by JDenz _
> *sounds like we have some Warcraft 2 players *




Warcraft ROCKS!

I like the game.


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## Nightingale (Mar 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *How do you meet, a nice girl who is rigt for you?
> 
> I have already done the dating service, and been introduced to all my friends and family single friends. .
> ...




http://www.russianzest.com/

I guess you can buy anything these days...mail order bride, anyone?


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by nightingale8472 _
> *http://www.russianzest.com/
> 
> I guess you can buy anything these days...mail order bride, anyone? *




Nightingale,

Thank you :asian: 


This site has lots of beautiful women who have degrees adn jobs from Linguist to Doctor to Dentist to business to unemployed 

Yet, many have a good education!  Thanks 



(* ******************** *)

The only problem I see is that most of these young ladies are looknig for men from Europe, and need some need to have you communications translated 

Oh Well thanks for trying ! :asian:


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## JDenz (Mar 12, 2003)

Warcraft 3 is the best though.


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## Seig (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Oh man, I love that show.   However Nickelodeon and tv land took it off of their evening viewing hrs.   I'm not sure who the idiot was that did that but it sure did make me angry.:soapbox: *


Psycho Dad!


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## Seig (Mar 12, 2003)

Somehow this was a double post.  So I will change it's content.  I do not know why you guys insist on telling MOB not to eat the yellow snow, it is easily the highest in protein content.


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## Seig (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by nightingale8472 _
> *http://www.russianzest.com/
> 
> I guess you can buy anything these days...mail order bride, anyone? *


Yes, it's true, it proves that there is in fact hope for the hopeless.


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## WilliamTLear (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by nightingale8472 _
> *http://www.russianzest.com/
> 
> I guess you can buy anything these days...mail order bride, anyone? *



Do they offer refunds?


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## Seig (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by WilliamTLear _
> *Do they offer refunds? *


I don't know about that, but I suppose you could always have them deported.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by JDenz _
> *Warcraft 3 is the best though. *



I like the Night elves 

THey ROCK! :rofl:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *I don't know about that, but I suppose you could always have them deported. *




Hmmmm, would they then take half you stuff with them?


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Hmmmm, would they then take half you stuff with them?
> 
> *



Keep your stuff then give 'em a boot to the @ss on the way out.:rofl:


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## Seig (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Hmmmm, would they then take half you stuff with them?
> 
> *


I doubt INS would let them take that much with them


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## Seig (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Keep your stuff then give 'em a boot to the @ss on the way out.:rofl: *


Jas, I am disappointed in you, a boot to the heiney, indeed.  
_*Boot to the Groin*_


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## JDenz (Mar 12, 2003)

I like every race.  But orcs are the best lol.  what name do you use and what gateway do you play on?


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## JDenz (Mar 12, 2003)

By the way it is snowing in buffalo today.


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## chufeng (Mar 12, 2003)

Seig & Bill,

What do you do in the following situation:

You are about to meet your new supervisor...
You double check yourself in the mirror just before knocking on the door to enter and notice a tiny little booger in the one nose hair that is sticking out...
So, you reach up to get rid of the offending thing and a larger, longer, fresher, and greener booger follows it out...
Just then the new supervisor opens the door and says "Hi" with a hand extended in greeting...


What do you do?

:asian:
chufeng


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## cali_tkdbruin (Mar 12, 2003)

> _Originally posted by JDenz _
> *By the way it is snowing in buffalo today. *



I'm glad I'm in Southern Cali, it was nice, sunny and warm here...


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## Seig (Mar 13, 2003)

> _Originally posted by chufeng _
> *Seig & Bill,
> 
> What do you do in the following situation:
> ...


That's an easy one, you turn and quickly execute the _*Boot to the Groin*_


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## pesilat (Mar 13, 2003)

> _Originally posted by chufeng _
> *Seig & Bill,
> 
> What do you do in the following situation:
> ...



Simple. You confidently reach out and shake his hand. Then pull back quickly with a look of revulsion and say, "Man! That's gross! Where've you had your hand?"

Mike


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 13, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *That's an easy one, you turn and quickly execute the *Boot to the Groin* *



Well, are you sure you will still get hired then?


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 13, 2003)

> _Originally posted by pesilat _
> *Simple. You confidently reach out and shake his hand. Then pull back quickly with a look of revulsion and say, "Man! That's gross! Where've you had your hand?"
> 
> Mike *




Mike,

Speaking from experience??? 

:rofl:


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 13, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Well, are you sure you will still get hired then?  *




Yes you will, because they will want to get even over a long period of time!

 :rofl:


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## pesilat (Mar 13, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Mike,
> 
> Speaking from experience???
> ...



[* Turn the sensitivity on your humor proximity alarms down so you don't blow any fuses *]

Of course. It worked great. He apologized profusely and bought me lunch then I turned down the job offer 

Mike


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 13, 2003)

> _Originally posted by pesilat _
> *[* Turn the sensitivity on your humor proximity alarms down so you don't blow any fuses *]
> 
> Of course. It worked great. He apologized profusely and bought me lunch then I turned down the job offer
> ...




Class Act!  :asian: 

Way to GO!

I did not get lunch.


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## Seig (Mar 14, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Well, are you sure you will still get hired then?  *


According to the scenario, you already have the job.  Now you are just reaffirming that you are an aggressive go gettter.  You are also establishing yourself as an Alpha.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 16, 2003)

> _Originally posted by nightingale8472 _
> *http://www.russianzest.com/
> 
> I guess you can buy anything these days...mail order bride, anyone? *



Nightingale,

I know you never would sign me up, yet some of the others out there???  

E-mail I received :
I post it here for everyone entertainment. Nothing else 

Enjoy!

*****
Dear Sir, if you are still interested to find your woman in Eastern Europe,
please let us know your opinion on the following idea below.

Can you find your woman fast?
Can you spend minimum money on that search?

Or you prefer to wait for long years and spend money without any exact
system? And somewhere deep inside you believe that you won't find your
beauty in Eastern Europe?

If you answer "yes", please don't read on.

There are many ways to find your woman. The best and the fastest way is to
live in Eastern Europe for some time. But - you need to know Russian or
Ukrainian. Alas, but it takes very much time to learn Russian. If you don't
know Russian or Ukrainian, what can you do?
What do usually men do - men use one or several methods, that are described
below:

1. they look through databases of different agencies, buy addresses or pay
for correspondence or buy membership for some time.

2. men can also buy a tour and come to see a few dozens or hundreds of
ladies without preliminary correspondence with them.

3. men can also order advertising in local newspapers, can put their
profiles on different dating sites.

Did I miss anything? There a few other methods, but these are the main. The
best, if you can do everything yourself, without anybody's help. In that
case, if you wish to find your woman fast, you need to have much free time,
you need to know computers and internet well, you need to know Russian or
have peple who will help you will Russian.
If you don't have much free time, then you should use somebody's help, help
of some agency.
The best if agency will do all that they can to find your woman fast. It
means, that this agency should work with you personally, prepare individual
program for you, use all possible methods to find your soulmate.
Here we have a problem. The majority of agencies are not interested to work
with you personally, if you are not ready to pay them at least 500 - 1,000
USD or Euro just to begin the work and pay 2,000 - 5,000 USD or Euro after
you get your soulmate. And even in these cases, if you are ready to spend
this money, you cannot be 100 percent sure, that they will find your woman.
And you cannot choose yourself what you really need that agency to do for
you. They just offer you a program and you should agree to it or leave them.

We think that there is a better way to find your woman. It differs from what
other agencies offer in the following:

1. You choose everything yourself. It is your unic individual program. You
tell us criteria: what woman, where from (country, cities), what ways of
search to use (we can advise a few dozens of unic ways).
2. You get all services at one place. All - means literally all.
3. You get all at small prices. If you find prices lower, we'll beat them.
4. You make minimum pre-payment (deposit) and if we find your woman fast,
you pay us the final royalty.
5. You can order search in any place of ex-USSR. We can find your woman
almost in any place of ex-USSR (we have very big database, cooperate with
very many agencies via ex-USSR, use various unic methods of search).

Example


1 month of personal work (minimum variant)*.

1. You can look through 5 000 profiles of ladies and get their e-mails.
2. You can order advertisment in 4 newspapers of the majority places of
Ukraine.
3. We choose and deliver to you profiles of minimum 200 - 300 ladies who
meet your criteria.
4. We place your profile on our site and on 10 popular dating sites in
internet
5. We deliver your profile to our partners, 120 dating agencies all over
ex-USSR - you pay them separately but at much lower prices then they
generally offer.
6. We deliver your profile to e-mails of 10 000 women.
7. You can get all necessary translation from/into English and German.
8. We can come to interview the chosen lady to any place of Ukraine
(including photo session).
9. You get all other services that need (invitations, visa, tours etc at
much lower prices)
10. After 31 day of our cooperation ends, you have the right:
a) to be our member for 12 months and get e-mails of all ladies, published
on our site;
b) we deliver to you minimum 5-10 profiles a month according to your
criteria without limitattion of time, until you find your soulmate
c) you can get other services with discounts 5 - 30 per cent.

Cost of this program.
You do pre-payment 170 USD (or Euro), and pay 60 USD (or Euro) after you
meet each lady and pay 1,500 USD (or Euro) after you marry the woman, who we
found for you.

*There can be different changes both in the cost and in the services for
each client. We can send our employees to find your woman to almost any
place of ex-USSR and we can find such ladies, who never published their
profiles anuwhere.

If you are interested in cooperation with us, please reply us and we can
discuss with you how we can help each other. Anyway, please let us know your
opinion, it is very important for us.

Sincerely yours,
Aleksey Kisselyov.
director of introduction agency "Sovetnik"
Postal address: Shevchenko 36-26, Nikopol, Dnepropetrovsk region, Ukraine,
53211
E-mail: admin@brides.com.ua; akka@nikopol.dp.ua
Site: http://www.brides.com.ua


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## Nightingale (Mar 16, 2003)

ROTFLMAO!!!!   :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: 

I didn't sign you up, but that doesn't mean I'm not gonna laugh about it! LOL!!!!!  Good luck!

-N-


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 16, 2003)

> _Originally posted by nightingale8472 _
> *ROTFLMAO!!!!   :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
> 
> I didn't sign you up, but that doesn't mean I'm not gonna laugh about it! LOL!!!!!  Good luck!
> ...




Thanks  


I aprriciate it   

At Least you are laughing.  I am glad people are enjoying 
:rofl:


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## Master of Blades (Mar 16, 2003)

> _Originally posted by nightingale8472 _
> *ROTFLMAO!!!!   :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
> 
> I didn't sign you up, but that doesn't mean I'm not gonna laugh about it! LOL!!!!!  Good luck!
> ...



Ditto :rofl: :rofl:


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 16, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *At Least you are laughing.  I am glad people are enjoying
> :rofl: *



Rich, I'm laughing with you.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 16, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *Rich, I'm laughing with you. *




Thanks JF!

BTW I may be away for a few days for work.


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## Seig (Mar 18, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Thanks JF!
> 
> BTW I may be away for a few days for work.
> ...


Going to Russia?


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 18, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *Going to Russia? *




Nope London Ont Canada,

Close enough though


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## Seig (Mar 19, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Nope London Ont Canada,
> 
> Close enough though
> ...


There's a real tiny guy over there (hint: he owns a dog named samson) running around with a fake russian accent......


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## jfarnsworth (Mar 19, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *BTW I may be away for a few days for work.*



How's the work going anyhow?


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## moromoro (Apr 24, 2003)

great


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## Seig (Apr 24, 2003)

> _Originally posted by moromoro _
> *great *


Moromoro,
Please stop with the one word posts simply to boost your post count.  Especially when the word makes no sense.


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## moromoro (Apr 24, 2003)

sorry seig 

i will


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## moromoro (Apr 24, 2003)

p.s i was not intending to boost my post count 

why would i want to do that 
i was simply saying its great for him to be back


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## Seig (Apr 25, 2003)

> _Originally posted by moromoro _
> *p.s i was not intending to boost my post count
> 
> why would i want to do that
> i was simply saying its great for him to be back *


In that case, forgive my assumption.  However the date on that is old and he has once again dropped from sight.


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## moromoro (Apr 25, 2003)

since this is the advice column 

what do you guys advise for overtraining??
what are the syptoms is stress one of them??


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## Jill666 (Apr 25, 2003)

No, but I hear asking many silly questions is.


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## Seig (Apr 25, 2003)

> _Originally posted by moromoro _
> *since this is the advice column
> 
> what do you guys advise for overtraining??
> what are the syptoms is stress one of them?? *


The only real recovery from overtraining is to back off a bit.  IF you continuer to over train, you will harm your body.  Certain types of stress can in fact be induced from overtraining.  When the body is not in good condition, it throws your bodily systems off, thereby producing imbalance chemical reactions in the body that manifest as stress.


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## moromoro (Apr 25, 2003)

thanks


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## Master of Blades (Apr 26, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Jill666 _
> *No, but I hear asking many silly questions is. *



Was I the only one that found that hysterical!? :lol:


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## moromoro (Apr 26, 2003)

I NEVER BOTHERED TO READ THE REPLY


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## jfarnsworth (Apr 26, 2003)

> _Originally posted by moromoro _
> *I NEVER BOTHERED TO READ THE REPLY *



Why??????


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## jfarnsworth (Apr 26, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Was I the only one that found that hysterical!? :lol: *



No, I did as well. However I've been off of martial talk for a few days so did not reply.


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## moromoro (Apr 26, 2003)

> No, but I hear asking many silly questions is.



hahahahaha


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## Master of Blades (Apr 26, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *No, I did as well. However I've been off of martial talk for a few days so did not reply. *



Welcome back....Glad I wasnt the only one :lol:


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## cali_tkdbruin (Apr 26, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Jill666 _
> *No, but I hear asking many silly questions is. *



Nice comeback!! I agree with ya 100%...


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## jfarnsworth (Apr 27, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Master of Blades _
> *Welcome back.... *



I'm not going to be on as much here in the next month or so. I'll still check in from work & such but just not post as much. The class night has changed plus since it's getting nicer outside we're going to start biking at night now, well pretty much every day.


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## moromoro (Apr 28, 2003)

TKD  

what would you rate it as a martial art?


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## Rich Parsons (Apr 28, 2003)

> _Originally posted by moromoro _
> *TKD
> 
> what would you rate it as a martial art? *



Terry,

Please refrain from art bashing. This issue has ben discussed previously, and it has ended with warnings or suspensions of the people involved.

This is Martial Talk - Friendly discussion is what we are looking for here.

Thank You
:asian:


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## pesilat (Apr 28, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *Terry,
> 
> Please refrain from art bashing. This issue has ben discussed previously, and it has ended with warnings or suspensions of the people involved.
> ...



If I may, I'd like to elaborate on this because I can guess where it may end up shortly.

Terry, no one's accusing you of bashing TKD. But your question is the type which, in the past, has led to incredibly nasty arguments on discussion boards all across the internet. And, often, it opens the door for other people to bash a system. Then the system's proponents hop on board to defend their system. And it usually devolves very rapidly into petty bickering and name calling which is, as Rich points out, not what this board is about.

Mike


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## Seig (Apr 28, 2003)

> _Originally posted by moromoro _
> *TKD
> 
> what would you rate it as a martial art? *


 I will try and answer this with viloating Rich's sensibilities.  While is well known that I am a kenpoist, I also spent many years doing TKD.  I had some wonderfull instructors that taught well and had usefull information to pass on, I had others that weren't worth what they paid for their dobok.  So the answer to your question is this, TKD if taught properly, is a wonderful and beautiful art with loads of practical application.  It can also be a very exciting sport.  It depends on what you are looking for and the calibre of instructors available.  Then again, this can be true of most any art, no?


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## Seig (Apr 28, 2003)

> _Originally posted by pesilat _
> *If I may, I'd like to elaborate on this because I can guess where it may end up shortly.
> 
> Terry, no one's accusing you of bashing TKD. But your question is the type which, in the past, has led to incredibly nasty arguments on discussion boards all across the internet. And, often, it opens the door for other people to bash a system. Then the system's proponents hop on board to defend their system. And it usually devolves very rapidly into petty bickering and name calling which is, as Rich points out, not what this board is about.
> ...


This thread belongs to Billy Lear and myself, anyone turns our thread into a bashing thread is going to find themselves bashed, literally.


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## Rich Parsons (Apr 28, 2003)

I apologize to you guys - I did not mean to come off as saying anyone was bashing or attacking TKD. I was just trying to head off any negative issues and or discussions. Please no one take the impact of my comments, only the intent, that I wanted a nice a friendly discussion.

:asian:


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## Seig (Apr 28, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *I apologize to you guys - I did not mean to come off as saying anyone was bashing or attacking TKD. I was just trying to head off any negative issues and or discussions. Please no one take the impact of my comments, only the intent, that I wanted a nice a friendly discussion.
> 
> :asian: *


I know that, I just couldn't resist poking you with the pointed stick you just handed me.


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## Rich Parsons (Apr 28, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *I know that, I just couldn't resist poking you with the pointed stick you just handed me. *



:rofl: 

You should talk to JF and Jill they seem to think I have been real funny of late.   

 :rofl: 

(* Here is another Pointed Stick *)


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## moromoro (Apr 28, 2003)

:rofl:


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## cali_tkdbruin (Apr 29, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Seig _
> *I will try and answer this with viloating Rich's sensibilities.  While is well known that I am a kenpoist, I also spent many years doing TKD.  I had some wonderfull instructors that taught well and had usefull information to pass on, I had others that weren't worth what they paid for their dobok.  So the answer to your question is this, TKD if taught properly, is a wonderful and beautiful art with loads of practical application.  It can also be a very exciting sport.  It depends on what you are looking for and the calibre of instructors available.  Then again, this can be true of most any art, no? *



Thank you for that fine explanation. I hope all the doubters on this board take the time to read it... :asian:

If the doubters should happen to ignore your post then I want permission to poke them with a stick.


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## cali_tkdbruin (Apr 29, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> *I apologize to you guys - I did not mean to come off as saying anyone was bashing or attacking TKD. I was just trying to head off any negative issues and or discussions. Please no one take the impact of my comments, only the intent, that I wanted a nice a friendly discussion.
> 
> :asian: *



I think you're doing a superb job in nipping this line of questioning in the bud before it blows up into cyber sparring and some people begin breaking out their flame throwers. :asian:


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## moromoro (Apr 29, 2003)

question about TKD

in TKD is it true that you get instructors from other arts to teach you self defense.... i.e against knife and  locks


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## jfarnsworth (Apr 29, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Rich Parsons _
> [BYou should talk to JF and Jill they seem to think I have been real funny of late. [/B]



It's all in good fun Rich, and nothing more than that.


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## Rich Parsons (Apr 29, 2003)

> _Originally posted by jfarnsworth _
> *It's all in good fun Rich, and nothing more than that. *



I know that, and if I cannot get a good comeback them I might as well go with it 

:asian:


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## Seig (Apr 29, 2003)

> _Originally posted by cali_tkdbruin _
> *Thank you for that fine explanation. I hope all the doubters on this board take the time to read it... :asian:
> 
> If the doubters should happen to ignore your post then I want permission to poke them with a stick.   *


Permission Granted


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## Seig (Apr 29, 2003)

> _Originally posted by moromoro _
> *question about TKD
> 
> in TKD is it true that you get instructors from other arts to teach you self defense.... i.e against knife and  locks *


Again, it depends on your instructor, it's not a lack in the art.


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## JDenz (Apr 30, 2003)

I just seen highlevel TKD on tv not to long ago at the titian games I thought it was pretty awsome.


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## cali_tkdbruin (Apr 30, 2003)

> _Originally posted by JDenz _
> *I just seen highlevel TKD on tv not to long ago at the titian games I thought it was pretty awsome. *



Thanx, at least someone appreciates us... :shrug: 

:uhyeah:


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## jfarnsworth (May 2, 2003)

> _Originally posted by cali_tkdbruin _
> *Thanx, at least someone appreciates us... :*


 

At least some more than others, I guess.


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## moromoro (May 3, 2003)

game recognise game


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