# Ready for your close-up?



## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

Hello all my lovely Martial Talk friends!

I'm in a reflective mood this morning, just idly people-watching while sitting here having a coffee. I'm wondering what all these good people do, what problems they've got, what makes them laugh, what direction their lives move in. I believe that every single one of us without exception has got a great life story to tell, so... 

Imagine I'm a commissioning producer. I've seen you around and I'm proposing to make a movie biography of you. I charge you with casting your own lead. Who gets the starring role? And why? It doesn't matter who you choose past or present. As your imaginary producer having such great conviction in your story, I can pull unfathomably big strings.

Me? Conceited I know but I'd love to be played by Jodie Foster back in her Accused / SotL days. A clever actress and a strong-willed, smart and pretty woman. That's basically everything I'm probably not. Though it doesn't stop me aspiring! 

Of course it'd have to be a computer-shrunk, wig-wearing Steven Seagal for the action scenes, ha!

I would love to hear from you.

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## bydand (May 2, 2006)

Well I would love to have Sean Connery from his 007 days - handsome, witty, charming, deadly, etc... BUT, in order to be more realistic the lead would have to go to Larry the Cable Guy - redneck, overweight, lacking social skills,  etc....   For the early life flashbacks it would have to be some skinny, lacking self-confidence guy.

Wow, tough question actually.  Makes you think how not only you preceve yourself but how you think others see you as well.  I'm sure if my wife answered this question for me it would be vastly different, and that is why I love her, she sees the real me, and has from the day we met.


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## terryl965 (May 2, 2006)

Mine would be an easy one it was left on the screenwriter table for no one would produce my life or anything else not worth the money they would spend.
Terry


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

bydand said:
			
		

> Well I would love to have Sean Connery from his 007 days - handsome, witty, charming, deadly, etc... BUT, in order to be more realistic the lead would have to go to Larry the Cable Guy - redneck, overweight, lacking social skills, etc.... For the early life flashbacks it would have to be some skinny, lacking self-confidence guy.
> 
> Wow, tough question actually. Makes you think how not only you preceve yourself but how you think others see you as well. I'm sure if my wife answered this question for me it would be vastly different, and that is why I love her, she sees the real me, and has from the day we met.


Yeah, I'm getting the picture in high definition! Forget the Cable Guy, Sean Connery in his 007 years it is!

You're right Scott, it's interesting how we see ourselves in our mind's eye isn't always what we see in our bedroom mirrors. As your producer I want to bring out the best in you so Sean it is and we'll mixdown the lacking-in-confidence flashbacks with a damn good soundtrack so it's still cool!

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

terryl965 said:
			
		

> Mine would be an easy one it was left on the screenwriter table for no one would produce my life or anything else not worth the money they would spend.
> Terry


Terry, I aint hearing that from you. Theres a story in you, I can feel it and I've got the midas touch in these things. If youre not gonna sanction my biography of you, Im gonna have to release it as an unofficial version anyway. Lets see now, whos free, Costner, Pacino, Spacey...

Terry, dont make me pick one  you know I will!! Ha!

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## KenpoTex (May 2, 2006)

Either Val Kilmer from his Heat, Saint, or Spartan roles, or Tom Cruise from Collateral. In all of the movies listed, the character was low-key, professional, and above all, deadly.  OTOH, I also like Val's performance as Doc Holliday in Tombstone


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## terryl965 (May 2, 2006)

Wel jenn I gues you made me do this so Jim Belushi that would be my choice, he is funny and so I'm I and we both have the same body type if you know what I mean. By the way round is a shape for all of you who says anything different.
terry


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

terryl965 said:
			
		

> Wel jenn I gues you made me do this so Jim Belushi that would be my choice, he is funny and so I'm I and we both have the same body type if you know what I mean. By the way round is a shape for all of you who says anything different.
> terry


Yay Terry! James Belushi - Dude!!! Seriously cool choice. Funny, I think a choice like that speaks volumes - you're a confident guy! You know if I had to choose a screen dad, that'd probably be him - though maybe I'm just seeing myself as "Curly Sue" remember that one?

Ok, done deal, I'll get you a K-9 too, I'll bet you're a doggie fan??

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

kenpotex said:
			
		

> Either Val Kilmer from his Heat, Saint, or Spartan roles, or Tom Cruise from Collateral. In all of the movies listed, the character was low-key, professional, and above all, deadly. OTOH, I also like Val's performance as Doc Holliday in Tombstone


Oh yeah, I'm SO liking that, Val Kilmer made Heat what it was, am I right? And no matter what you all think of him, Tom Cruise's Vincent was a masterpiece of characterisation. Man, you're painting a BIG picture for me here - with that casting recommendation and that avatar. Woohoo, I'm looking forward to making this one - I'll order in extra ammo and stunt ketchup!!

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## KenpoTex (May 2, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> Woohoo, I'm looking forward to making this one - *I'll order in extra ammo and stunt ketchup!!*
> 
> Yr most obdt hmble svt,
> Jenna


:rofl:


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## stickarts (May 2, 2006)

Ok, I will give you all a chance for comedy here.....you see my photo in  my avatar, i am the guy on the right. Are there any actors that remotely look like me? I am looking for suggestions!
NOT taking looks into account,I would pick Christopher Reeve because there are so many things i liked about him and could relate to many things he has said in his life, but you can very clearly see I look nothing like him! Any suggestions! (be nice!)  
Jenna, any ideas?
I have been told that my eyes look like Patrick Swayze's LOL!


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

stickarts said:
			
		

> Ok, I will give you all a chance for comedy here.....you see my photo in my avatar, i am the guy on the right. Are there any actors that remotely look like me? I am looking for suggestions!
> NOT taking looks into account,I would pick Christopher Reeve because there are so many things i liked about him and could relate to many things he has said in his life, but you can very clearly see I look nothing like him! Any suggestions! (be nice!)
> Jenna, any ideas?
> I have been told that my eyes look like Patrick Swayze's LOL!


Frank, yeah good ol Christopher Reeve, what a hero on and off screen! He was a big guy too as I recall, well over 6 and a helluva fighter through his paralysis. Top choice! I understand totally!

Ooooh baby! Patrick Swayze hits the spot for me alright, ha! Didnt he do some genuine MA too, or am I imagining? Nah, scrap Swayze - you look like a solid guy Frank, I hear Russell Crowes free these days  Im thinking LA Confidential Russell Crowe - the strong, tough and silent type and not the bigtime vaunter that he is now.

For the stickwork scenes, well a toughie and no mistake. I know Kali and Chris Sayocs stuff featured in Bourne and The Hunted but not much stickwork. Hmmm... OK, hows about we get Crowe on the blower and you can train him up. If he gets lippy or outta line, well contract you to smack him good, LOL!

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## stickarts (May 2, 2006)

Well, if Crowe is on his very BEST behavior we can strike a deal!  
I admire him as an actor but not when he is hitting people with telephones!
I definately try and be more the gentleman type! I guess like Clark Kent!
Thanks Jenna, you are a great producer!
Maybe i can do my own stick fighting scenes?


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## shesulsa (May 2, 2006)

No one can play me like I can. :ultracool


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## bushidomartialarts (May 2, 2006)

nathan fillion from firefly.  not the best looking, or the strongest, or the smartest.  just stubborn as hell and totally devoted to his people.


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

shesulsa said:
			
		

> No one can play me like I can. :ultracool


Never a truer word spoken! Now thats what I like to hear. Though did I say its not high-paying  I would hate to compromise anyones artistic integrity by mentioning money!! Ha! And don't tell me you don't get outta bed for less than ten million, cause it ain't gonna fly girl! 

Im thinking youre the type of lady who would relish doing your own stuntwork too! No wires, just pure skill and talent! Im loving it already. Whatll we call it?

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## shesulsa (May 2, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> Never a truer word spoken! Now thats what I like to hear. Though did I say its not high-paying  I would hate to compromise anyones artistic integrity by mentioning money!! Ha! And don't tell me you don't get outta bed for less than ten million, cause it ain't gonna fly girl!
> 
> Im thinking youre the type of lady who would relish doing your own stuntwork too! No wires, just pure skill and talent! Im loving it already. Whatll we call it?
> 
> ...



LOL!  Credit, directorial priveledges and scale will be enough for me.

Howzabout we call it, "It ain't the years ..."?


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

bushidomartialarts said:
			
		

> nathan fillion from firefly. not the best looking, or the strongest, or the smartest. just stubborn as hell and totally devoted to his people.


Now, dont be disrespecting the Filster! I like Canadian guys, stout and hardy, ha! But I like your thinking  seeing the bodywork behind all that sparkly opalescent paint is a great skill to have. As is modesty my friend! What more can I say? We start shooting end of month  any particular flavour of personal assistant? LOL.

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

shesulsa said:
			
		

> LOL! Credit, directorial priveledges and scale will be enough for me.
> 
> Howzabout we call it, "It ain't the years ..."?


Ah, touche, touche!! You got business acumen too. Damn, you all-rounders, LOL  OK, I'll have to call my lawyer.

It ain't the years as in...
"It Ain't the Years, (It's the Fame)" or "It Ain't the Years (It's the Money)"

Ha! OK, I concede 

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

stickarts said:
			
		

> Well, if Crowe is on his very BEST behavior we can strike a deal!
> I admire him as an actor but not when he is hitting people with telephones!
> I definately try and be more the gentleman type! I guess like Clark Kent!
> Thanks Jenna, you are a great producer!
> Maybe i can do my own stick fighting scenes?


Now Frank, don't go all Clark Kent on me. Nothing better for our Russ than a timely slap from a real man!! Ha! Oh, I'm having one of my moments: picture it - "The Man with the Golden Sticks". Oh yeah! Coming atcha!

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## stickarts (May 2, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> Now Frank, don't go all Clark Kent on me. Nothing better for our Russ than a timely slap from a real man!! Ha! Oh, I'm having one of my moments: picture it - "The Man with the Golden Sticks". Oh yeah! Coming atcha!
> 
> Yr most obdt hmble svt,
> 
> Jenna


 
No worries! Clark Kent would make a quick change when the stick fight starts!


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## shesulsa (May 2, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> Ah, touche, touche!! You got business acumen too. Damn, you all-rounders, LOL  OK, I'll have to call my lawyer.
> 
> It ain't the years as in...
> "It Ain't the Years, (It's the Fame)" or "It Ain't the Years (It's the Money)"
> ...



It Ain't the years, (It's the Mileage)"


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

shesulsa said:
			
		

> It Ain't the years, (It's the Mileage)"


Or in my case, "It Ain't the Mileage (It's the Condition of the Bodywork)". Poor me! Ok, it's your film but I can see you're gonna be a handful on set. I'll need to have words with security to keep an eye on you missy 

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## shesulsa (May 2, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> Or in my case, "It Ain't the Mileage (It's the Condition of the Bodywork)". Poor me! Ok, it's your film but I can see you're gonna be a handful on set. I'll need to have words with security to keep an eye on you missy
> 
> Yr most obdt hmble svt,
> Jenna



Oh yeah, I'm a pistol!  :2pistols:


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## Rich Parsons (May 2, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> Hello all my lovely Martial Talk friends!
> 
> I'm in a reflective mood this morning, just idly people-watching while sitting here having a coffee. I'm wondering what all these good people do, what problems they've got, what makes them laugh, what direction their lives move in. I believe that every single one of us without exception has got a great life story to tell, so...
> 
> ...


 

I thought they already made a short of my life. It was part of the Sin City Movie. The actor Mickey Rourke who played Marv.


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## Jenna (May 2, 2006)

Rich Parsons said:
			
		

> I thought they already made a short of my life. It was part of the Sin City Movie. The actor Mickey Rourke who played Marv.


A future classic I'd have absolutely no doubt. Marv was something else altogether. I can't remember the name of the original artist, but how on earth did he dream up that character? What a piece of work. I know he can box but who said Rourke couldn't act? Though what was that odd Van Damme one with the scene with the tiger?? 

Anyway, top film. And that was about you? OK, how about a sequel? I'll give you merchandising rights? Come on, what'll it take? 

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## OUMoose (May 2, 2006)

Mine would be easy.  Either John Pinette or Louie Anderson.  Anyone who's met me will understand.  *nods*


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## Rich Parsons (May 2, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> A future classic I'd have absolutely no doubt. Marv was something else altogether. I can't remember the name of the original artist, but how on earth did he dream up that character? What a piece of work. I know he can box but who said Rourke couldn't act? Though what was that odd Van Damme one with the scene with the tiger??
> 
> Anyway, top film. And that was about you? OK, how about a sequel? I'll give you merchandising rights? Come on, what'll it take?
> 
> ...




Shhhhh!


The Prequal is in the works.  


*** 

Imagine four guys sitting a theatre, and this whole movie (* Sin City *) is about violence and fighting of different styles and about different characters pain and their growth or lack there of. 

The audience is about half full. 

When Marv starts to fight the Door Men, I yell, "YES!, Finally someone who knows and has been there." 

None of the crowd laughs.

None of the crowd comments.

My Friends just look at me. 

Then they bust out into the quiet giggles of guys trying not to make noise or laugh at another guy who could hurt them. 

***


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## Swordlady (May 3, 2006)

Lucy Lui.  No contest.


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## Jenna (May 3, 2006)

OUMoose said:
			
		

> Mine would be easy. Either John Pinette or Louie Anderson. Anyone who's met me will understand. *nods*


Man, you're making it difficult for me  Now those are what I call esoteric choices, still, two cuddly and very funny guys. 
I think I actually caught Louie some time back in London at the Comedy Club before all the tabloid stuff.

OK, so what're we talking, a martial arts comedy? A bagfull of one liners. Picture this, I'm seeing our man Sammo Hung as stunt double and since I know ol Louie had a walk-on in Ferris Bueller, well we gotta get the Ferrari 250GT in there too. SO that's telling me it's gonna be a road movie, Cannonball Run style, hey, wasn't Jackie Chan in that? Yeah, call him up, get Burt Reynolds too if he's still alive, we can have the racers drive through the woods to a rocked up version of Dueling Banjos. Man, this is gonna be big... Whatdya mean this is supposed to be a biography? You telling me it didn't happen like that? Somebody get me a cigar, LOL
btw, that avatar's a blast 

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## Jenna (May 3, 2006)

Rich Parsons said:
			
		

> Shhhhh!
> 
> 
> The Prequal is in the works.
> ...


 
Ahh, you've researched the role, by randomly striking fear into the hearts of your pals. I see you've given this some thought already. Well ya know, I like that - you're a method man like Brando and DeNiro. I'm feeling your pain, you need to get rid of that actor's angst. This is gonna be some performance - but reel it in, don't be a primadonna!! Let Rourke do the acting, you can consult on hair and makeup!!

*checks out what Balintawak is* ... Damn it's one of those dangerous filipino ones with all manner of knives and sticks and stuff. OK, I jest, I jest. Have what you want, more groupies? More money? Fleet of limos to chauffeur in your collection of Nikes?? Anything! Anything but the sticks! Don't hurt me, I'm your producer, I can help you... Aaaaaargh.

It was all a dream. Now, just sign this contract, right here 

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## Jenna (May 3, 2006)

Swordlady said:
			
		

> Lucy Lui. No contest.


Lucy Liu I like that - seriously good choice! Just the right balance of attitude, glamour and action. Your choice is speaking to me SL!!

OK then, well it's gotta have some major Siamese action, maybe a little artistic license: set in space, the future? How's that grab you? OK, OK, get this, the future like totally ruled by cat people, all gorgeous and knowing it. Someone has to stop them, yep, it's you SL!

Well, that's sort of how your life's panned out, right? Oh, come on, work with me here, ha! Just joking, don't cut me, don't cut me! Mark it well Swordlady, I'm your producer, I can make and break careers! Uh-oh, no, no, not the lightsaber... Damn, that thing really works...

Stop me SL, I'm sort of losing it here right in front of everybody and you're not helping by hitting me with the butt of that sword. Ouch 

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## Rich Parsons (May 3, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> Ahh, you've researched the role, by randomly striking fear into the hearts of your pals. I see you've given this some thought already. Well ya know, I like that - you're a method man like Brando and DeNiro. I'm feeling your pain, you need to get rid of that actor's angst. This is gonna be some performance - but reel it in, don't be a primadonna!! Let Rourke do the acting, you can consult on hair and makeup!!



Yes there is a method to my maddness.  

Well of course we have to talk hair! He has to use just the right colour and I have just the box for it. Loreal Paris 21  



			
				Jenna said:
			
		

> *checks out what Balintawak is* ... Damn it's one of those dangerous filipino ones with all manner of knives and sticks and stuff. OK, I jest, I jest. Have what you want, more groupies? More money? Fleet of limos to chauffeur in your collection of Nikes?? Anything! Anything but the sticks! Don't hurt me, I'm your producer, I can help you... Aaaaaargh.



I see you have been talking to my friend Paul aka Tulisin. :lol:  He thinks I hate all women. I do not I just fear them as any wise man should. 



			
				Jenna said:
			
		

> It was all a dream. Now, just sign this contract, right here
> 
> Yr most obdt hmble svt,
> Jenna



What! 75%, Hey now, My "ex' did not get that much out me. :roflmao:


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## Jenna (May 3, 2006)

Rich Parsons said:
			
		

> Yes there is a method to my maddness.
> 
> Well of course we have to talk hair! He has to use just the right colour and I have just the box for it. Loreal Paris 21


Ha! Man, you do comedy too - ANOTHER allrounder *envious eyes* Ok, but that doesn't hold any sway with me fella! I'm the boss here. I'll call the shots - or is that the director? *remembers what Balintawak is* OK, well, since you're being such a good boy and not a primadonna at all, don't mind if I ship you in a crate of Loreal Paris 21? Though, I'm thinking lovvy, now that I look at you, will you be really upset and angry if I could only get number 6? I really think you'd suit that better darling 



			
				Rich Parsons said:
			
		

> I see you have been talking to my friend Paul aka Tulisin. :lol: He thinks I hate all women. I do not I just fear them as any wise man should.


Yes, a dark robed man on horseback gave me a scroll warning me of the terror that calls himself Rich Parsons, no hang on, let me read that again, nope, it says Keyser Soze, sorry. I'm confused. It's the late hour. LOL. Oh, hold on, there's another bit. blah, blah, blah, Keyser Soze, who was killed in battle by... damn, I can't believe it... was killed in battle by Rich Parsons *ominous music in the background*, *a distant scream*



			
				Rich Parsons said:
			
		

> What! 75%, Hey now, My "ex' did not get that much out me. :roflmao:


RP, when this prequel hits the theatres, man you can tell your ex she's welcome to call you anytime at your villa in Hawaii or your pad in Beverly Hills.

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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## Rich Parsons (May 3, 2006)

Jenna said:
			
		

> RP, when this prequel hits the theatres, man you can tell your ex she's welcome to call you anytime at your villa in Hawaii or your pad in Beverly Hills.
> 
> Yr most obdt hmble svt,
> Jenna




I see you have the same plans I do on the subject. Live your life and enjoy it and just have fun.


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## Jenna (May 3, 2006)

Rich Parsons said:
			
		

> I see you have the same plans I do on the subject. Live your life and enjoy it and just have fun.


Until somebody clever shows me a better way  Yak atcha L8r my man.

Yr most obdt hmble svt,
Jenna


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