# has anyone had the same problem?



## abbey (Jan 28, 2014)

I have been training in muay Thai for quite some time now and cant seem to hit back, im fine on pads and try my best when sparring but my arms and legs turn to jelly as im about to hit, my coach thinks i have potential. Has anyone else had this problem? Or know any ways arround it


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## Touch Of Death (Jan 28, 2014)

abbey said:


> I have been training in muay Thai for quite some time now and cant seem to hit back, im fine on pads and try my best when sparring but my arms and legs turn to jelly as im about to hit, my coach thinks i have potential. Has anyone else had this problem? Or know any ways arround it


I always seem to dream this, but never it never happens in real life.


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## Danny T (Jan 28, 2014)

May sound crazy but one thing I do is have my intermediate and more advanced students stand in the corner or against the ropes/wall and they cannot move from that position. All they can do is defend. It is a survival drill for them. I have the beginner students punch them for 30 seconds switching out the beginners for several 3 minute rounds. After several rounds of the beginners punching like this their sense of range increases and their ability to actually punch someone goes way up. We then add kicks and the person on the ropes can start moving along the ropes/wall as part of their defense along with leg checks. People learn to survive against the ropes and others learn to hit and kick an opponent. As we develop this the defender will begin to add strikes with their defense. We start on jabs only or straight rts only and then combos as the beginner gains skills and abilities. This is a great way for one to learn to actually hit another knowing their aren't trying to hurt the other person but are actually helping them learn to increase their defensive skills.


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## Drose427 (Jan 29, 2014)

I too have only had this happen in dreams.. Its possible that you are subconsciously worried about hurting your opponent. I dont train in muay thai, but I went through something sorta similar. One night in sparring I was sparring one of black belts. He wasnt wearing headgear and when I landed a fairly hard crescent kick I could tell he felt it even though  he said he was fine and we continued to spar. For the next week, without realizing it, I was sparring at half everything. I didnt intend to, part of me was just worried about injuring my fellow students. My instructor had a talk with me about how people are going to get hurt, even if we spar as safe as possible things happen. You just have to suck it up and keep going, understand that they understand the possible injuries and harm that could come their way. It could be the same problem for you (just an idea) it could also be something completely different! Thats just what it sounds like it could be to me


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## abbey (Jan 30, 2014)

Jee thanks Mr touch of death, it could poss be a subconscious thing but i defo don't mean it, i even hold back on pads some times then afterwords dont feel like i had a real workout, too nice to be a thai boxer lol, my coach tried winding me up for 2 hours one time eventually got a few punches then i just burst into tears lol i really am just starting to think i just don't have it in me  hence trying to seek the world wide web's help, but thanks for the advice guys


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## DennisBreene (Jan 31, 2014)

One piece of advice I think you will hear repeatedly, regardless of the style, is DON'T GIVE UP.  It takes some of us longer than others. You can achieve what you wish to achieve.


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## Touch Of Death (Feb 1, 2014)

abbey said:


> Jee thanks Mr touch of death, it could poss be a subconscious thing but i defo don't mean it, i even hold back on pads some times then afterwords dont feel like i had a real workout, too nice to be a thai boxer lol, my coach tried winding me up for 2 hours one time eventually got a few punches then i just burst into tears lol i really am just starting to think i just don't have it in me  hence trying to seek the world wide web's help, but thanks for the advice guys


Well Dang!. I didn't mean to upset you. I was just saying I always dream this. I also happen to be over two hundred pounds, so I am pretty hard pressed to find an opponent that doesn't complain when I hit them. My advice, if you want it now, is to quit worrying about felling powerful. You aren't supposed to feel it. Listen for complaint.


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## abbey (Feb 2, 2014)

Slight 'Trash heap has spoken' misunderstanding  lol I'm actually tiny 5ft and weigh roughly 55kg whatever reason i cant hit back think its unfixable or id have been able to by now  just wanted to see if anyone had the same problem, seems in the only one lol


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## abbey (Feb 2, 2014)

Yeah hear that alot  wont give up training but defo fight training lol


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## mook jong man (Feb 2, 2014)

Whenever I had students that were a bit too timid and wouldn't hit me and nothing else was working
I would tell them to visualise that I had just slapped their mother in the face right in front of them.
For some people it provided a bit of a trigger that they needed for them to get in there and actually hit.


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## abbey (Feb 21, 2014)

If only it was that easy lol unfortunately my mother and i nor any of my family that close for it to anger me, but still in the gym anger shouldn't be the fuel to your power  oh well even the highest failure beats the **** out of not trying at all  give it a few more years then possibly retire my fighting dreams lol  x


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## Transk53 (Feb 22, 2014)

abbey said:


> If only it was that easy lol unfortunately my mother and i nor any of my family that close for it to anger me, but still in the gym anger shouldn't be the fuel to your power  oh well even the highest failure beats the **** out of not trying at all  give it a few more years then possibly retire my fighting dreams lol  x



You can be nice and still effect power where it is needed. You just have to never be afraid to get hit, or be hurt. Not saying that this is you, just a little saying I carry with myself. Just chill and breathe, and also burden yourself with negativity, you are training after all. Just my opinion


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## Muay Thai Hackney (Jul 20, 2014)

I was going through very much the EXACT same thing. It's just human nature - we don't necessarily want to hurt or get hurt, do we? However, this is a sport, and a full contact and very aggressive sport and you WILL have to hit back, and sometimes hit back hard. I'm not completely there yet, but the more I spar, the more I find myself having less empathy for my sparring partners. This is because these guys go hard on me so that I have no choice but to get my own back on them. It's nothing personal, it's just the way it is, but the sparring has helped me immensely. Start of light and as you become more comfortable with range, distance, counter fighting, you can get away with being more aggressive. It really is just down to sparring more and not making a big deal out of it.


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## drop bear (Jul 20, 2014)

Yeah to a certain extent. Some of the better guys get a bit blood thirsty when I push the pace and it can get a bit intimidating. And quite often it is easier to not fight back as hard especially when you are out classed.

I just did rounds until I got over it. Just each day spar until the feeling goes away. Don't worry about trying to be upset or angry just bulk repetition at an increasing pace each time


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## MemphisBlue (Feb 21, 2015)

I can completely relate. The first 6 months of training I panicked anytime anyone hit me and went on the complete defensive.  Eventually after being belted a few times my panic would become aggressive instead of defensive and after I'd battered my sparring partner id have an anxiety attack! Ive found as ive become more confident in my abilities and more comfortable with my partners I dont have that problem. My instructor has always been very supportive that way, he'd pair me with guys that are of the same ability or lower which helped alot as now im happy to fight those better than me with out the crazy freakout  It takes time @abbey eventually you'll get over it. I find channeling my anxiety when fighting helps, but the second I lose concentration I feel that overwhelming feeling, which is a bit distracting to get back in check midfight!


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## Tez3 (Feb 22, 2015)

In a lot of ways it's an upbringing thing, boys wrestle together, play fight punching each other and generally are fairly rough, as girls though we are brought up not to do this ( I was lucky my dad taught me to box very young as well as not treat me as a little 'princess') men even when adult still play punch and wrestle around. This means when they start a martial art the thought of punching each other and grappling doesn't worry them as much as it does the girls. Their problems start more when the punches start hurting 
 To be honest this is one reason I like to teach all female classes so we can work on being hit ( I know that sounds dreadful!) One of the things I do is accustom students to being hit in the head but gently. Head guards on and light taps all around the head, not to hurt but to help control the flinching, then to start seeing where the taps are coming from and to think about how to avoid them. Another exercise is to have students in pairs, one partner has pads on another has gloves/mitts on. The ones with gloves on lay on the floor face down with their heads down so they can't see, when given the word they have to jump up, find their partner and start hitting the pads. This helps them to start the punching without thinking but to react.
It's the thinking that is the problem in the early days, that we don't want to hurt someone which is often more important than not being hit. We have to get into the mind set that sparring is like a chess game, we aren't out to actually destroy an opponent but to out 'point' them by scoring more hits than they do. Rather than anger ( which is the quickest was to lose any type of fight) you need to start thinking competitively, something else that often girls aren't often encouraged to be.
Once you learn that actually _at the time_ the punches don't hurt ( they may well after but then you will be feeling happy about your performance ) and learn that you can treat your sparring as a game, which it is, you may well be surprised that you actually enjoy sparring.


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