# how do you treat visitors or how are you treated at other schools?



## BFL (Apr 25, 2008)

Peace to one and all,
  I was just reflecting the other day on an experience I had last year when I visited another family/lineage school for a seminar with a well known Master as guest.  I entered the Kwoon, approached the Sifu, very humbly stated who I was, my background and thanked him very much for the oportunity to attend the seminar etc, etc..  I don't like to feel sneaky or dishonest so I'm very open when I visit somewhere if nothing else out of respect for the Sifu and school, that's just the right thing to do.  
  I was greeted very coldly and actually felt "dissed" from the beginning.  The guest teacher (a Master in W.C. and I'll leave it at that) had not much more to say other than propoganda and very little in the way of showing much of anything substantial, maybe he felt he should hold back the secret's eh? After the seminar I approached and thanked the master for sharing his knowledge with us, but was ignored as he walked by. I approached the Sifu and was dissed even more, and my fiance' who was sitting against the wall noticed as I walked away from the Sifu, that he actually made faces at me and rolled his eyes.  It only reminded me how narrow minded and self engrandized some schools are. Their's is the best way and the only way and their Sigung is the only Sigung that knows what's up in W.C.        I'm pretty sick of it all anymore.
   This is not, I repeat not the correct practice for any martial artist much less within W.C. since ours is not an aggresive art, there for, we should be learning humility and "softness" in attitude as well.  Personally I know I'm not the best and I know I have much to learn, even as Sifu.  
   So now the query is, how do you (be honest with yourselves) treat others that visit your school or attend perhaps a seminar hosted by your school?  As well, what have been some of your experiences when you've visited other schools or seminars, that is of course if your Sifu let's you.  That's all folks, just wanted to get a feel for folks outlooks, experiences and attitudes.
Blessings and Peace to one and all, after all, we're supposed to be brothers right?
BFL


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## Brian R. VanCise (Apr 25, 2008)

BFL said:


> Peace to one and all,
> I was just reflecting the other day on an experience I had last year when I visited another family/lineage school for a seminar with a well known Master as guest. I entered the Kwoon, approached the Sifu, very humbly stated who I was, my background and thanked him very much for the oportunity to attend the seminar etc, etc.. I don't like to feel sneaky or dishonest so I'm very open when I visit somewhere if nothing else out of respect for the Sifu and school, that's just the right thing to do.
> I was greeted very coldly and actually felt "dissed" from the beginning. The guest teacher (a Master in W.C. and I'll leave it at that) had not much more to say other than propoganda and very little in the way of showing much of anything substantial, maybe he felt he should hold back the secret's eh? After the seminar I approached and thanked the master for sharing his knowledge with us, but was ignored as he walked by. I approached the Sifu and was dissed even more, and my fiance' who was sitting against the wall noticed as I walked away from the Sifu, that he actually made faces at me and rolled his eyes. It only reminded me how narrow minded and self engrandized some schools are. Their's is the best way and the only way and their Sigung is the only Sigung that knows what's up in W.C. I'm pretty sick of it all anymore.
> This is not, I repeat not the correct practice for any martial artist much less within W.C. since ours is not an aggresive art, there for, we should be learning humility and "softness" in attitude as well. Personally I know I'm not the best and I know I have much to learn, even as Sifu.
> ...


 
I am not a Wing Chun practitioner but I treat *all people* who come to training as I would treat any quest at my house.  If I know them from a couple of visits to seminars or if they are a regular student they are like family!


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## ackks10 (Apr 25, 2008)

BFL said:


> Peace to one and all,
> I was just reflecting the other day on an experience I had last year when I visited another family/lineage school for a seminar with a well known Master as guest.  I entered the Kwoon, approached the Sifu, very humbly stated who I was, my background and thanked him very much for the oportunity to attend the seminar etc, etc..  I don't like to feel sneaky or dishonest so I'm very open when I visit somewhere if nothing else out of respect for the Sifu and school, that's just the right thing to do.
> I was greeted very coldly and actually felt "dissed" from the beginning.  The guest teacher (a Master in W.C. and I'll leave it at that) had not much more to say other than propoganda and very little in the way of showing much of anything substantial, maybe he felt he should hold back the secret's eh? After the seminar I approached and thanked the master for sharing his knowledge with us, but was ignored as he walked by. I approached the Sifu and was dissed even more, and my fiance' who was sitting against the wall noticed as I walked away from the Sifu, that he actually made faces at me and rolled his eyes.  It only reminded me how narrow minded and self engrandized some schools are. Their's is the best way and the only way and their Sigung is the only Sigung that knows what's up in W.C.        I'm pretty sick of it all anymore.
> This is not, I repeat not the correct practice for any martial artist much less within W.C. since ours is not an aggresive art, there for, we should be learning humility and "softness" in attitude as well.  Personally I know I'm not the best and I know I have much to learn, even as Sifu.
> ...




i got to tell you that i have been at different schools and at seminars where i was teaching,and i was NEVER like that to anyone, but because i'm from south jersey (outside Atlantic city)  i say what i feel,you should have said something about how he was acting in a polite way, after all you paid to see this person:duh: i don't care what title he was hanging around his neck, that don't mean anything!!!!:idunno:, like we say "forgetaboutit",
but to say this about going to other schools, when i go i just go in and sit there and watch, i don't say anything , just watch , sometime's one of the students will come over and say "hey did i see on tv doing the sticks?"
thats when i leave


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## ackks10 (Apr 25, 2008)

BFL said:


> Peace to one and all,
> I was just reflecting the other day on an experience I had last year when I visited another family/lineage school for a seminar with a well known Master as guest.  I entered the Kwoon, approached the Sifu, very humbly stated who I was, my background and thanked him very much for the oportunity to attend the seminar etc, etc..  I don't like to feel sneaky or dishonest so I'm very open when I visit somewhere if nothing else out of respect for the Sifu and school, that's just the right thing to do.
> I was greeted very coldly and actually felt "dissed" from the beginning.  The guest teacher (a Master in W.C. and I'll leave it at that) had not much more to say other than propoganda and very little in the way of showing much of anything substantial, maybe he felt he should hold back the secret's eh? After the seminar I approached and thanked the master for sharing his knowledge with us, but was ignored as he walked by. I approached the Sifu and was dissed even more, and my fiance' who was sitting against the wall noticed as I walked away from the Sifu, that he actually made faces at me and rolled his eyes.  It only reminded me how narrow minded and self engrandized some schools are. Their's is the best way and the only way and their Sigung is the only Sigung that knows what's up in W.C.        I'm pretty sick of it all anymore.
> This is not, I repeat not the correct practice for any martial artist much less within W.C. since ours is not an aggresive art, there for, we should be learning humility and "softness" in attitude as well.  Personally I know I'm not the best and I know I have much to learn, even as Sifu.
> ...




i got to tell you that i have been at different schools and at seminars where i was teaching,and i was NEVER like that to anyone, but because i'm from south jersey (outside Atlantic city)  i say what i feel,you should have said something about how he was acting in a polite way, after all you paid to see this person:duh: i don't care what title he was hanging around his neck, that don't mean anything!!!!:idunno:, like we say "forgetaboutit",
but to say this about going to other schools, when i go i just go in and sit there and watch, i don't say anything , just watch , sometime's one of the students will come over and say "hey did i see on tv doing the sticks?"
thats when i leave:lool:


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## ackks10 (Apr 25, 2008)

don't know why two came up,,sorry,,thats crazy:jaw-dropping:


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## BFL (Apr 25, 2008)

Funny, my fiance' and I have a place up in Butler, North Jersey.  I'm on contract in central Fla right now. I definately understand what your saying, but "whatchagonnado-right?
  It was pretty bizarre and I was very surprised by it all, especially for such a supposedly "authentic" school.  My Sifu mentioned afterward, next time, say nothing, just go, observe and be done with it.... it's just sad that anyone would have such a 'tude, maybe he felt threatened somehow or he is insecure about, something, who cares... I actually would have said something but felt like perhaps discretion was the better part of valor..  
  What part of south Joisey you in bro?


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## BlueVino (Apr 25, 2008)

BFL said:


> So now the query is, how do you (be honest with yourselves) treat others that visit your school or attend perhaps a seminar hosted by your school?  As well, what have been some of your experiences when you've visited other schools or seminars, that is of course if your Sifu let's you.
> BFL



I'd like to think we make visitors feel welcome. A sifu (or at least a senior student) will usually spend a good deal of time with them, answering questions and talking about the art. Students taking their first few classes might feel differently, as our workout is more difficult than some people are used to, and they're encouraged to keep up.

Those times I've gone to other schools and met and worked with other masters, I've always felt a "friendly" vibe. I've never been accepted as a brother with wide open arms the moment I walk in, but I wouldn't expect that...

Cheers,
    Trueblood


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## Topeng (Apr 25, 2008)

With visiting guests, I have been lucky enough to have friendly instructors. For those we host, instructors have had extremely humble attitudes. If it had been like your experience, I'm sure our Guro would not invite them back.
He is pretty good about getting a feel for people before inviting them to the school either directly or from the recommendations of people he trusts.
Was this a complete stranger to your Sifu by chance?


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## BFL (Apr 26, 2008)

No, my fiance' and I were on vacatioin in another state and there was a seminar being offered featuring a Wing Chun master at one of the local schools there.  So I signed up online, paid at the door and went it. My Sifu was not involved in anyway.
Peace,
BFL


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## grydth (Apr 26, 2008)

I am a CMA practitioner who spends a large amount of time in a Goju Ryu karate school watching my duaghters' classes. I have seldom been treated better, be it MA or non MA related travel. There's a fair amount of good natured kidding around - mutual, I would add. 

Not only do they not hide techniques or katas, their higher ranked students are eager ro discuss and compare. They've invited me to bring my sifu along, anytime.

In short, as high class/high quality a dojo as you'll find.


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## stickarts (Apr 26, 2008)

Brian R. VanCise said:


> I am not a Wing Chun practitioner but I treat *all people* who come to training as I would treat any quest at my house. If I know them from a couple of visits to seminars or if they are a regular student they are like family!


 
Well said. Same here.


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## ackks10 (Apr 27, 2008)

BFL said:


> Funny, my fiance' and I have a place up in Butler, North Jersey.  I'm on contract in central Fla right now. I definately understand what your saying, but "whatchagonnado-right?
> It was pretty bizarre and I was very surprised by it all, especially for such a supposedly "authentic" school.  My Sifu mentioned afterward, next time, say nothing, just go, observe and be done with it.... it's just sad that anyone would have such a 'tude, maybe he felt threatened somehow or he is insecure about, something, who cares... I actually would have said something but felt like perhaps discretion was the better part of valor..
> What part of south Joisey you in bro?



Laurel springs, (near cherry hill)  :boing2:next time you come down here ,lets get us a cheese steak:bangahead:


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## Drac (Apr 27, 2008)

Brian R. VanCise said:


> I am not a Wing Chun practitioner but I treat *all people* who come to training as I would treat any quest at my house. If I know them from a couple of visits to seminars or if they are a regular student they are like family!


 
Good post Brian..ALL guests are treated with respect...


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## BFL (Apr 27, 2008)

I know where Laurel Springs is, nice area. When this contract is done I'll be back up there and you got a deal.  Dang, I'm thinking about that cheese steak and making me hungry, haha.
BFL


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## ackks10 (Apr 27, 2008)

BFL said:


> I know where Laurel Springs is, nice area. When this contract is done I'll be back up there and you got a deal.  Dang, I'm thinking about that cheese steak and making me hungry, haha.
> BFL




Hey, "forgetaboutit":wink2: LOL


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## BFL (Apr 27, 2008)

Hey, watchagonnado, right? Did you talk to da guy? about da ting?  )


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## ackks10 (Apr 27, 2008)

BFL said:


> Hey, watchagonnado, right? Did you talk to da guy? about da ting?  )



what ting,r u talking about?? the first ting, or the second thing,:uhyeah:, u keep it up i'll give u a fresh one!!!, (do u know what movie thats from)??


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## BFL (Apr 27, 2008)

Analyse that, Who'da thought DeNiro could do comedy?


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## ackks10 (Apr 27, 2008)

BFL said:


> Analyse that, Who'da thought DeNiro could do comedy?


,,,,,, "you got it man, you got it man"  whats thats from???mmmm!!!


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## BFL (Apr 27, 2008)

crud........ you got me on that one bro'......


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## ackks10 (Apr 27, 2008)

BFL said:


> crud........ you got me on that one bro'......





Al pacino, in Dog Day Afternoon, in front of the bank, (with all the money in his hand):tantrum:  Remember:xtrmshock


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## BFL (Apr 28, 2008)

DDDDOOOHHHHHHH, you got me ..... yup yup, it comes back to me now...okay, okay....here's one for ya,
  "All my life I've always wanted to be a wise guy"


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## ackks10 (Apr 28, 2008)

BFL said:


> DDDDOOOHHHHHHH, you got me ..... yup yup, it comes back to me now...okay, okay....here's one for ya,
> "All my life I've always wanted to be a wise guy"




well now, let me see,,mmmm!!! could it "Goodfellows" :jaw-dropping: yes i t is!!! (it better be):wink2:


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## BFL (Apr 28, 2008)

ding ding ding ding...... we have a winner.... "okay sir, pick anything off the shelf here for your prize...anything between the kupie dolls and the pencils, between the rubber vomit and the erasiers, yup basically on this one shelf right here, but pick anything"...... (now, name that movie)


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## ackks10 (Apr 28, 2008)

BFL said:


> ding ding ding ding...... we have a winner.... "okay sir, pick anything off the shelf here for your prize...anything between the kupie dolls and the pencils, between the rubber vomit and the erasiers, yup basically on this one shelf right here, but pick anything"...... (now, name that movie)




i got to tell you that you have to be a "jerk" if you don't know this  :wink2:


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## dungeonworks (Apr 28, 2008)




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## BFL (Apr 28, 2008)

haha, well done good sir.......and stay away from the cans.


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## dungeonworks (Apr 28, 2008)

BFL said:


> haha, well done good sir.......and stay away from the cans.




For the record, that was meant in a tongue in cheek sarcastic sort of way....I realized I didn't point that out! LOL


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## exile (Apr 28, 2008)

Things seem be drifting a bit here from the OP, guys... I think it's probably too good a topic to let it just meander off in a bunch of different directions.

My question is, just how common is the OP's kind of experience, compared with the response we all hope for in that situation, a friendly welcome from people anxious to put their best foot forward? It might be worth doing a poll on this, and seeing what the majority of the people responding found when they visited another school. My guess is that the experience would be, for most respondents, far more pleasant than the OPer's... at least, I'd _hope_ so....


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## ackks10 (Apr 28, 2008)

sorry guys i know things got off topic, sorry it won't happen again


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## dungeonworks (Apr 28, 2008)

exile said:


> Things seem be drifting a bit here from the OP, guys... I think it's probably too good a topic to let it just meander off in a bunch of different directions.
> 
> My question is, just how common is the OP's kind of experience, compared with the response we all hope for in that situation, a friendly welcome from people anxious to put their best foot forward? It might be worth doing a poll on this, and seeing what the majority of the people responding found when they visited another school. My guess is that the experience would be, for most respondents, far more pleasant than the OPer's... at least, I'd _hope_ so....



Ive never attended a seminar but have visited several training places.  NEVER have I gotten any attitude remotely as childish and unproffessional as the OP's.  That is BS and I would have wanted my money back.  The rolling eyes and making faces bit would have triggered at the least a verbal confrontation with me.


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## exile (Apr 28, 2008)

dungeonworks said:


> Ive never attended a seminar but have visited several training places.  NEVER have I gotten any attitude remotely as childish and unproffessional as the OP's.  That is BS and I would have wanted my money back.  The rolling eyes and making faces bit would have triggered at the least a verbal confrontation with me.



I had exactly the same reaction. I can't believe that this is a general pattern... it sounds like something very unusual. With that kind of attitude, I don't see how anyplace could stay in business very long... how could you keep your clientele?


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## jks9199 (Apr 28, 2008)

exile said:


> I had exactly the same reaction. I can't believe that this is a general pattern... it sounds like something very unusual. With that kind of attitude, I don't see how anyplace could stay in business very long... how could you keep your clientele?


I've never encountered a particularly negative attitude at a seminar or clinic.  I've had some very good experiences with other schools... and a few that weren't too interested in talking to me when they realized I wasn't going to be another source of money for them.

Let's be honest...  a commercial enterprise can't be as welcoming as a school that's just a sideline.  Add concerns like insurance and lawsuits, and I can understand some less than welcome approaches.

Also, I wasn't there; I didn't see the behavior, I don't know who it was actually directed at... and I didn't see the OP's behavior.  It could be that they did or said something that was misinterpreted or misunderstood.  It doesn't excuse rudeness, but it may mitigate it.


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## matsu (Apr 29, 2008)

from the welcome i got as a newcomer i hope i get more of the same if and when i visit others. my sifu is a very chilled guy.i am sure he would welcome any visitor or guest. very little of the threatened behaviour i used to get in karate.they were extremely hostile form one style to another-always one upmanship!
matsu


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## BFL (Apr 30, 2008)

Well, it is the first time I experienced it, and I wouldn't have known the worst of it had my g/f not been sitting there to see the Sifu's actions when my back was turned.  The sad part is, this is a reputable school with _very_ reputable lineage, and yet they must have a lot of insecurities about themselves.  The Chi Sao I witnessed was also pretty poor, I think this is a case of "believing their own hype" and thinking they're "IT" and when others show up they feel their fantasy world is being threatened.  I've been very welcome in many other places across the country.  It just goes to show you, no matter who, attitudes can still prevail if we lose our humility.
Blessings to all,
BFL


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## geezer (Apr 30, 2008)

BFL said:


> and my fiance' who was sitting against the wall noticed as I walked away from the Sifu, that he actually made faces at me and rolled his eyes. BFL


 
Al Gore is teaching Martial Arts now? Seriously though, People need to get over themselves. I just attended a "gathering" with representatives from a variety of styes generously sharing their arts. The demos ranged from awesome to nearly absurd _in my opinion._ But regardless of our opinions, we all showed the demonstrators respect. After all, they were kind enough to put themselves out there to share with us. If more people would act like that, maybe the WC community wouldn't always be tearing itself apart .


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## qwksilver61 (Jun 1, 2008)

Sometimes it all depends on how big their Ego is.I met the famous Jim Harrison once (he is in the who's who) He was very polite,not egotistical,he took a derelict,run down building and breathed life into it's foundation,handmade makawara,rock gardens,koi,etc.etc.(you know where I'm going with this)He definitely had a huge aura about him even when standing still.Being young and full of ego,I was eager to tell my tale, He said; "you are in a Dojo,a realm, to learn what I have to offer to you,what can I do for You?" how do you answer to that? It commanded even more respect to someone who I didn't even know.Most people place themselves too far out of everyones reach,forgetting where they themselves started.Of course these days everyone has something to prove.


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