# Loosing the "spark" for training ...Help!



## karatekid1975 (Mar 14, 2005)

Hey all.

I'm posting this here, cause I do Korean martial arts, and I want to hear advice from my fellow Korean Martial Artists (nothing against anyone else, though).

Anyways, I think I'm loosing the spark for training again. Am I having doubts, or getting bored, or what is it? How do I get the spark back? I learned a lot about character in MA, but I think that's shot right now, too.

Also, check out my school http://www.usamastersacademy.com/ and tell me what ya think. I'm looking for honest opinions, no slamming. Thanks


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## Brad Dunne (Mar 14, 2005)

Being that close to Black Belt and having these feelings could be one of two things. 1) Perhaps you are just over training (TKD & TSD) or Perhaps you are just affraid of reaching that BB level. You would not be the first to doubt themselves while being at the doorstep of their journeys goal. Only you can honestly sit down and have a talk with yourself...(one of the hardest things to do in life) and reach a conclusion. But take this knowledge with you........You have trained and changed things in your life, for the better I'm sure. Use the confidence that the training has instilled in you, to face whatever is causing your frustrations. If your totally honest with yourself, you'll find your answer.


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## bignick (Mar 14, 2005)

I think Brad gave you the best advice you could give.  The motivation for training needs to come from inside you.  External forces should not play a big part in the decision.  When it comes down to it, we can all tell you to do it or not, but in the end you have to make the decision and it won't be any easier, no matter what others have told you.  

 If you wanted to consult with anybody about this, I'd recommend your instructor, if that's not someone you feel comfortable talking with, that might be a part of your problem right there.  I hope  you don't regret your choice, no matter what it is.  It's probably not what you wanted to hear, because usually when someone goes looking for advice it's to make the decision easier, but sometimes, no matter how much advice and help you get the decision doesn't get any easier.  However, what we can do is support you and your decision.  Best of luck to you.


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## glad2bhere (Mar 14, 2005)

Dear Laurie: 

This may not be exactly what you want to hear right now, but consider this for only a moment and then move on as you will. What I ask you to consider is that you have hit the point where the "real" training has finally begun. 

There are people who train many years and motivate themselves by looking for the "next big thing". Their MA career is little more than moving from one trophy to the next, or one belt rank to the next. These are called "Reasons" for training because they are things from *outside* of the individual and when these go away, the motivation for training goes away. 

Other people train for a "Purpose" and a "Purpose is something that is *inside* the person. Usually a Purpose is some fundamental change that a person desires to make in themselves. 

There is a very good chance that up until this moment you may have been running on some Reason like "self-defense" or "novelty", or "short-term accomplishments". It sounds like those things have finally run their course, and now you have a chance to make a clear choice about whether there is something you want to change about the person who you are using your MA training as the method for making those changes. To be very honest with you, unless you engineer things some special way the chances of you using MA for the kind of heroic or survivalist reason the MA were invented are actually pretty slim. But the need to become a person greater than who you are right now will be with you your whole life. Now would be a great opportunity to see if you are ready to make some basic changes about the way you deal with Life using MA training for the things it can teach you about who you are. if you are looking for motivation I can't think of anything better than becoming a person greater than who you are right now. FWIW. 

Best Wishes, 

Bruce


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## Drac (Mar 15, 2005)

Laurie.
         I too have experienced that lack of desire to train..Do what I did and take some time off..Get involved in something besides MA training, for me it was amature theatre..I became involved in a production and returned after 3 months and trained harder than I ever thought possible..Just my opinion..


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## American HKD (Mar 15, 2005)

karatekid1975 said:
			
		

> Hey all.
> 
> I'm posting this here, cause I do Korean martial arts, and I want to hear advice from my fellow Korean Martial Artists (nothing against anyone else, though).
> 
> ...


I've had my share of ups and downs in training, alot of times it's bordom or your not happy with the school ( no motivation ).

Try another school maybe?


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## karatekid1975 (Mar 15, 2005)

Brad Dunne said:
			
		

> Being that close to Black Belt and having these feelings could be one of two things. 1) Perhaps you are just over training (TKD & TSD) or Perhaps you are just affraid of reaching that BB level. You would not be the first to doubt themselves while being at the doorstep of their journeys goal. Only you can honestly sit down and have a talk with yourself...(one of the hardest things to do in life) and reach a conclusion.



I only train in TKD. I used to train in TSD before I moved. Anyways, I think you maybe on to something here. Maybe this is the reason and I just don't know it yet.



			
				bignick said:
			
		

> If you wanted to consult with anybody about this, I'd recommend your instructor, if that's not someone you feel comfortable talking with, that might be a part of your problem right there.



You hit that nail on the head 



			
				glad2bhere said:
			
		

> There is a very good chance that up until this moment you may have been running on some Reason like "self-defense" or "novelty", or "short-term accomplishments". It sounds like those things have finally run their course, and now you have a chance to make a clear choice about whether there is something you want to change about the person who you are using your MA training as the method for making those changes. To be very honest with you, unless you engineer things some special way the chances of you using MA for the kind of heroic or survivalist reason the MA were invented are actually pretty slim. But the need to become a person greater than who you are right now will be with you your whole life. Now would be a great opportunity to see if you are ready to make some basic changes about the way you deal with Life using MA training for the things it can teach you about who you are. if you are looking for motivation I can't think of anything better than becoming a person greater than who you are right now.



Sheesh! I think you hit the nail on the head! That sparked thoughts, that's for sure. It will definitely give me something to think about.

And I think the "time off" thing might help too. Thanks all for your advice.


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## Kempogeek (Mar 15, 2005)

Hi Laurie. My sensei once told us that there comes a time in our training that "time off" is needed so that it doesn't become boring. Right now Im sort of in that situation. Mainly because of my job, working 3rd shift. It's been a couple of months since I last been to class although I do stay in touch with the school. Looks like I might have to extend my time off until the Fall as work doesn't look like it's going to slow down anytime soon. I still have the desire to return and will stay in training on my own.  I hope that you will get the spark back again. Good luck!!! Best regards, Steve


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## shesulsa (Mar 15, 2005)

Laurie, the best advice has already been given you - take a short time off (or as long as you feel you need to self-assess), examine your reasons and goals, and communicate with your instructor.

 This is a point most people reach with everything, really.  It's known as several other catchy phrases, i.e. writer's block, seven-year-itch, hit the wall, burned out, etcetera.  You have reached a point in your training where it has become work, fun work, but still work.  Alas, you must find reason to continue, re-ignite the flame.

 If you take time off, don't do ANY martial arts AT ALL.   Don't even practice what you know.  Don't watch any martial arts films, read any MA books ... nothing.

 I like Bruce's statement about being a better person than you are right now.  This is a way of life, a way of being and doing.  So look all ways at this crossroads and kick back a bit.  When you just begin to feel the tug, resist, then see where it goes.

 Go to a completely different school for a little while (different style, too).  By being there, you might remember just what it is about your art that you like so much.

 Hang in there, woman.  Most of us have been there and through it.  You will be through it too soon enough.


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## lulflo (Mar 15, 2005)

I can only tell what I did in the instant that my brain fade had set in. I couldn't remember any new techniques, I was beginning to get overwhelmed with all of the knowledge that I had accumulated and was having a hard time with focus. I found that reading books about the world and other things helped me refocus. I especially liked reading about ancient history. I was finding out about more and more that was out of my reach and that helped me realize that I needed to turn inward and find out more about me, since I am here and can work on myself everyday. Once the fog lifted, I was able once again to gain an understanding of new material and embrace the art I had chosen to utilize and help me find out more about myself than I ever could with out it. Hope all that made sense. Good luck to you.


Farang - Larry


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## karatekid1975 (Mar 15, 2005)

shesulsa said:
			
		

> This is a point most people reach with everything, really.  It's known as several other catchy phrases, i.e. writer's block, seven-year-itch, hit the wall, burned out, etcetera.  You have reached a point in your training where it has become work, fun work, but still work.  Alas, you must find reason to continue, re-ignite the flame....




Yea, that is kinda what it feels like. I'm not burned out, but it's like I hit a brick wall, and having "whiter's block." I can't seem to remember some stuff, no matter how much I try. It's a bit frustrating.



			
				shesulsa said:
			
		

> Go to a completely different school for a little while (different style, too).  By being there, you might remember just what it is about your art that you like so much.



I was seriously thinking about this. Not quitting here, but do something to re-ignite my passion for training. Like take up Judo again or something, just to try something different for a while.

I can't take time off, though. My boyfriend is testing for BB in three weeks. He wants me to coach him since I have trained longer. I can't let him down.

But all your advice really helps. Thanks all


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## TigerWoman (Mar 17, 2005)

What did it for me...imagine everyone, including your husband telling you should quit...imagine your instructor hating you, but not expelling you...  well, as the saying goes, the tough get going.  

Laurie, do you have what it takes, do you know what you need to train on, focus on, devote more time to?  Is your goal a black belt and or a way of life?  Are you doing it for you or for someone else?

So I tell you without any ill will... you can't get your black belt.  What!!!!


Now, go prove me wrong and spark that spark and do it girl!  TW


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## karatekid1975 (Mar 17, 2005)

TigerWoman said:
			
		

> What did it for me...imagine everyone, including your husband telling you should quit...imagine your instructor hating you, but not expelling you...  well, as the saying goes, the tough get going.
> 
> Laurie, do you have what it takes, do you know what you need to train on, focus on, devote more time to?  Is your goal a black belt and or a way of life?  Are you doing it for you or for someone else?
> 
> ...



I think he does hate me LOL. Na, he is just "razzing me."

Yes, actually there is stuff I need work on. My forms are getting a bit sloppy, and my new form is tuff. It is giving me a hell of a time to learn.

You know ... My goal was black belt for the most part. But since I posted this thread, I did some heavy thinking. I decided to make changes for the better. Be a better person (like Bruce explained), and healthier. So I think the "way of life" explains my new change. I don't only want to wear a BB when I get it, I want to BE a BB mentally and physically. I have a lot to work on, though. Wish me luck


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## Andy Cap (Mar 24, 2005)

It sounds like you are starting to learn the "Do"  To get cheesy and cliche' for a moment...Martial arts is not about the goal - it is about the journey to the goal.


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## karatekid1975 (Mar 24, 2005)

Andy Cap said:
			
		

> It sounds like you are starting to learn the "Do"  To get cheesy and cliche' for a moment...Martial arts is not about the goal - it is about the journey to the goal.



My honey said that to me the other day ..... not in those words though. He said, " You're finally "getting" it (he slaps himself in the head)." Meaning, I am finally getting the mental stuff down. LOL


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## Andrew Green (Mar 24, 2005)

So in 3-weeks take a break.

 Everyone needs to take a break once and a while.  

 Most sports have seasons, we don't.  But as important as the season is to other sports, the off season is still important.

 Take some time, don't set a time limit, just stop training until you want it again, and if that time never comes it never comes, maybe you'll end up in something else.

 But don't think "I can't quit cause I'm this close".  Thats doing it for the wrong reasons, and is not going to help you in the long run.  It's also lossing to that whole "back belt" marketing scheme


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## floweringknight (Mar 24, 2005)

Reminds me of an old saying: "When the student is ready, the master will _appear_!" Always keep in the back of your mind the BIG PICTURE. It will help to guide you in times of uncertainty. I wish you the best of luck (and your man too)!


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## karatekid1975 (Mar 25, 2005)

Thanks  I'll let you know how he did.


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## Basicman (Apr 22, 2005)

Your doing this to make yourself a better person.  This is part of the training.  Swords are forged in fire and it takes a lot of work to make a good one.  You'll be stronger and a better person after taking a break, and you can come back mentally with a fresh approach.


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## Kenpodoc (Apr 22, 2005)

I'm not TKD or TSD but in Kenpo I find that when I go to a seminar I come back energized and excited again. There's something about spending time with students and instructors from other schools which I find energizing.

Jeff


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## karatekid1975 (Apr 22, 2005)

Actually Kenpodoc, that's what I did. I went to a bo seminar (Which is what I was mainly having trouble with). And it re-ignited my "flame" for training. I got lots of help and advice there (on other forms as well). And after the seminar, something just "clicked." I was like "duuurrrrr." This isn't so hard after all  :uhyeah:   :ultracool 

Oh, about my boyfriend's test. He did really well, but broke his hand during the test (breaking three boards, no spacers, and he rolled his hand). But he passed anywho  The graduation is tomorrow (to get his belt officially).  artyon:


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## sasquatchnaruto (Apr 26, 2005)

well its good that you got your spark back


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## karatekid1975 (Apr 26, 2005)

Thanks  I recently saw a mpeg of someone performing Taegeuk 8 and it totally blew me away! This dude was really sharp. I decided on trying to improve my forms, too (I'm a forms geek LOL), so that also helped bring the spark back


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## Kempogeek (Apr 27, 2005)

karatekid1975 said:
			
		

> Thanks  I recently saw a mpeg of someone performing Taegeuk 8 and it totally blew me away! This dude was really sharp. I decided on trying to improve my forms, too (I'm a forms geek LOL), so that also helped bring the spark back


Sometimes it doesn't take much to re-ignite that spark again. Good luck and keep up posted! Best regards, Steve


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## karatekid1975 (Apr 27, 2005)

Thanks. I'll definitely keep ya posted


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## Yeti (May 2, 2005)

Here's a quote I came across that I think is fitting to the situation you're in...

"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on."  -Franklin D. Roosevelt


Hope you stick with it.  

-Mike


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## TX_BB (May 3, 2005)

Just do it!

You'll be suprised how inspired  you get after black belt test. The key to your continuation with TKD is, why are you doing TKD?

Pil Sung


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## karatekid1975 (Oct 3, 2005)

Uggg. I'm bumping this thread up because I'm at that point again (I didn't want to repost about the same thing).

I did start another martial art (see my sig) to see if that re-ignite the "flame for training." I am really into Jujitsu, but I do that once a week, if that (this week, my instructor is on leave because his grandmother is sick. He has to stay with her till his parents get back from vacation).

Anyways, I'm not training in TKD hardly at all. I don't think it has to do with Jujitsu, because I do that even less (not by choice). I know my stuff in TKD now, but it's like, "whatever." I skipped out on class again tonight. I have been going twice a week at the most (once is more like it).

Help again ... PULEEEZZZEEE!


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## Gemini (Oct 3, 2005)

karatekid1975 said:
			
		

> Help again ... PULEEEZZZEEE!


 Not really sure what you want help with? Finding the answer? You already know the answer. What you really want is to understand your choice. (yes, right out of matrix, but it fits like a glove, doesn't it?) To convince you to stay with TKD? To assure you it's okay to leave? Simply ask yourself. Do you want to stay with TKD? 

 Lulls are pretty common. They've happened to everyone I've known at one time or another. People get bored with routine. Personally, I plug through it and am always glad I forged ahead, but that doesn't mean that's the answer for you. If you're finding that you're not getting anything from it, take a break. It isn't against the law. You can always come back at a later time if you so choose. I know you started JJ a short time ago and are really pumped with it. Maybe you're just taking on too much.

 Whatever you decide, stick with it. If you choose to continue, then continue. No excuses why you have to miss. sick, busy, tired. All garbage. If you're going to do it, then do it. Hold to your conviction. If you lack the conviction, then stop wasting you're time. I know I'm giving you a verbal kick in the pants, but I've always liked your attitude so I won't pull any punches with you.

 Just some things to think about. Everyone takes their own path. Yours may or may not include continuing TKD. All I can recommend is that you be honest with yourself in your assesment of your situation. Do what feels right for you. The rest will come naturally.

    I  wish the best for you regardless of the choice.


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## karatekid1975 (Oct 3, 2005)

Gemini, thanks. Maybe that's what I need is a verbal kick in the pants, I donno. But I will definitely think about what you just posted (it's brain food  ). I am actually online chatting with my Jujitsu instructor's wife (3rd dan TKD) and she is on my case, too LOL


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## arnisador (Oct 4, 2005)

Can you find a training partner for the jujutsu so you can practie mid-week?


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## Gemini (Oct 4, 2005)

karatekid1975 said:
			
		

> ...Maybe that's what I need is a verbal kick in the pants....I am actually online chatting with my Jujitsu instructor's wife (3rd dan TKD) and she is on my case, too LOL


lol. Well, after all, aren't flyings kicks what we're known for? Keep us posted on what you decide.

Regards,


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## karatekid1975 (Oct 4, 2005)

arnisador, yes I do have a partner for JJ. My boyfriend takes it with me. We where practicing throws yesterday. That's always fun hehehehehe.

Gemini, hehehehe. My friend (the one I was talking to on MSN messeger last night) was trying to get me back into TKD. I think it worked. But I will definitely keep you posted


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## Pacificshore (Oct 5, 2005)

Laurie:

You are so very close to achieving your BB.  You've come far in your training, and have switched several times.  This is where the "rubber meets the road" so to speak.  Just think of the void that would be ever present if you choose to simply stop training in TKD all together.  I personally could not have that void knowing all the long hours, hard work, and sweat I put into my training.   I have hit many a walls in my MA training, but as I have said before, it is how you overcome those ruts that will define you as a martial artists.  Good luck, and like others, I know you know what the right thing is to do in your situation.


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## Gemini (Oct 5, 2005)

Pacificshore said:
			
		

> You are so very close to achieving your BB. You've come far in your training, and have switched several times.... Just think of the void that would be ever present if you choose to simply stop training in TKD all together. I personally could not have that void knowing all the long hours, hard work, and sweat I put into my training.


I respectfully cannot agree with you here. Your first reference is the belt being the goal. The belt should never be the goal. She will have lost nothing by quitting now. She can retain what she learned. That's the goal. As far a creating a void, yes, for you (and quite frankly me) that may be the case. But we cannot know if it's the case for Laurie. Only she can. If it does, she can go back anytime she wants.



			
				Pacificshore said:
			
		

> I have hit many a walls in my MA training, but as I have said before, it is how you overcome those ruts that will define you as a martial artists.


Agreed. But because her path may separate from TKD, doesn't mean she's made a poor choice. She wants to continue a MA. Just maybe a different one. As I said before, everyone's path is different. Quitting an art isn't important. The reason's for quiting are. I most definately agree with you on that.

Regards,


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## Pacificshore (Oct 5, 2005)

Gemini said:
			
		

> I respectfully cannot agree with you here. Your first reference is the belt being the goal. The belt should never be the goal. She will have lost nothing by quitting now. She can retain what she learned. That's the goal. As far a creating a void, yes, for you (and quite frankly me) that may be the case. But we cannot know if it's the case for Laurie. Only she can. If it does, she can go back anytime she wants.
> Regards,


 Gemini, you are correct in that the belt should not be the goal.  My main point was the void that would be left after all the hard work invested into her training.  Perhaps I could have written what I meant better


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## Pacificshore (Oct 5, 2005)

A small excerpt from Takayuki Mikami Sensei's interview with Jose Fraguas:

*Q*: Would you give any advice to karate parctitioners in general?
*A*: Sometimes karate is boring and I understand.  Everything is boring if you do it everyday for 30 years! The secret lies in not giving up, but in training the simple things until you feel better.  That's the real test of Budo.  The hardest thing to teach in martial arts is spirit, but it is the most important aspect the art of karate can offer to its practitioners.  The mental and spiritual aspects of the martial arts can help one to overcome any kind of difficulties.  That's the key-learning how to keep going day-by-day.

I kind a of saw this as being appropriate for this particular post :asian:


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## mantis (Oct 5, 2005)

karatekid1975 said:
			
		

> Hey all.
> 
> I'm posting this here, cause I do Korean martial arts, and I want to hear advice from my fellow Korean Martial Artists (nothing against anyone else, though).
> 
> ...


 since im not Korean im not gonna comment on the spark of training of yours. but i wanna say use less red on the page, and less color variety.. 
 HCI people (ahem, moi!) recommend you only use about three colors on a page. the colors shouldnt vary much, unless for errors, warnings, or special things you wanna draw attention to (like "SALE!!") or something like that.
 other than this minor thing i think it's a great site...
 g'luck


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## karatekid1975 (Oct 5, 2005)

Actually, both of you are right (Pacificshore and Gemini). My bud said that the other night, Pacificshore. She said that I work so hard to get this far, and it would be a waste to let it go, specially since she WANTS me to teach for her (I need to be a BB first). She knows I would regret it if I just "stopped" TKD. She said I have a lot of talent, and she wouldn't want it to go to waste. But she doesn't want to see me stop jujitsu either (I learn from her husband), because I also picked that up quick ... well, for the most part LOL. 

She thinks I have a mental thing about testing for BB. I tested with BB's last time (my 1st gup test), and I failed it. But she said I creamed some BB's in sparring. I honestly don't remember. I know I didn't do all my breaks, and my forms, I had a mental block on (eventhough I know them inside and out). 

I also don't want a "gift" ... well, we are not going to get into that now. That's a looooong story hehehehehe. Let just say, some passed when they should have failed as some of the other students said.


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## karatekid1975 (Oct 5, 2005)

mantis, I didn't build that site. I know who did, though. So I will pass that along. But I was actually trying to get opinions on the dojang, not the site


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## karatekid1975 (Oct 10, 2005)

Uhg ... I'm played hookie from class again. I haven't trained at all in two weeks (other than Jujitsu, but I almost skipped out on that friday, too).


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## arnisador (Oct 10, 2005)

I know the feeling--yet I always feel better after I go!

Maybe you need a break from it all, so you can come back eager and refreshed...or decide to go another way, if that's where this is heading (who knows?). Not trying to be pessimistic, but it sounds like you're due for a break from feeling guilty about not going.


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## Andy Cap (Oct 11, 2005)

Consider that people come to points in their training that they are uncomfortable with or when they simply do not feel "it".  The lesser martial artist walks away and "takes a break".  The true martial artist knows the tenet "Never retreat in battle", and applies it hear with such ferocity that the boredom or struggle is forgotten.

 Why are you bored?  Are you the very best you could ever be?  Do you think you cannot achieve any more than what you have?  Why?  

 Going to another martial art is like moving to another town everytime you start to feel uncomfortable.  My mother calls this a geographical cure.  The problem follows you and you try to outrun it, but everywhere you go, it is there when you finally settle down.  Face this demon and beat it.  What more can we say, or should we say?  This is your battle and we cannot fight it for you.  I have been in Korean martial arts for 28 years - I know what you face.  I also know it is not as strong a creature as it appears to be.  Focus on every detail in your training and stop looking for the ghost of boredom.


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