# Script Frenzy



## granfire

http://www.google.com/search?q=scri...s=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a

As of midnight it on:
Write a 100 page script for any kind of format, alone or with friends.

Not sure if I can come up with something. I have plenty of stories, but no idea how to put it in to a script.

It's a fun exercise though. Even if the result is utter garbage and never gets past the hint of an attempt. I had a great time last year during NaNoWriMo.


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## Big Don

Make sure you post a link to yours so we can see what you came up with.


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## Steve

Granfire, thank you for sharing this.  I've been having a blast coming up with ideas, writing up log lines and beat sheets and as of this morning, I banged out 6 pages of dialogue for the opening couple of scenes.

I'm stevebjj on scriptfrenzy, so be sure to add me as a writing buddy!   Also, if you would like critique, I'd LOVE to help you out and would welcome your feedback, as well.

My Script Frenzy profile:  http://scriptfrenzy.org/eng/user/803669


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## Big Don

stevebjj said:


> Granfire, thank you for sharing this.  I've been having a blast coming up with ideas, writing up log lines and beat sheets and as of this morning, I banged out 6 pages of dialogue for the opening couple of scenes.
> 
> I'm stevebjj on scriptfrenzy, so be sure to add me as a writing buddy!   Also, if you would like critique, I'd LOVE to help you out and would welcome your feedback, as well.
> 
> My Script Frenzy profile:  http://scriptfrenzy.org/eng/user/803669


Show us yours too.


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## granfire

Big Don said:


> Make sure you post a link to yours so we can see what you came up with.




I am kind of looking like my Avatar right now, because I have NO idea.


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## Steve

Big Don said:


> Show us yours too.


LOL.  I'll show you mine if you... err... nevermind. 

Seriously, I'll be happy to share it with anyone who asks.  I'm not overly concerned about theft.  But I've been advised that, while I shouldn't be paranoid, posting the entire script online would be ill advised.  

If you (or anyone else I know around here) is interested, I'll be happy to share it with you.  Just fire me a PM.  I'd love to hear from you.


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## Big Don

I wish I could write, but, I can't.


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## granfire

Big Don said:


> I wish I could write, but, I can't.



For this month you have the permission to write and do so badly. 
If you have an idea, try it.


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## MA-Caver

I've made several attempts to write a script based on a sci-fi novel and one based on a fantasy novel that I love but time and having resources (computer) to do it... 
Then also the imagery involved with both those novels could only NOW be done thanks to CGI by either Weta or ILM 
Ah well...


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## Steve

Caver, why not write the screenplay this month?  Join us.


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## granfire

A bit from my NaNo last year:


> _Riders_ a guard yelled.
> The General hurried out, weapon in hand, closely followed by the old mage. From another tent Lady Lyriana emerged with her staff ready for battle.
> A small group emerged on the road ascending to the camp. Slow at first but as soon as they recognized the standards of the camp they spurned their horses to a gallop. General Wulf counted four riders.
> It cant be astonished he watched as his Princess and her companions charged up the hill with big smiles on their faces. While the children pulled up their mounts the princess rode up to the general were she slit out of the saddle and without thinking threw her arms around him. Overjoyed he swung her around while his lips found hers for a kiss. To the roaring cheers of the troops the general set her down. With a sigh the princess nestle her head on his shoulder, but the moment was brief as Lady Lyriana whisked her away to her tent along with Selma. Paul and Felix had to help Master Theoderius to guide the stunned general to his tent laughing along the way. Then Paul and Felix greeted the old mage with hugs while the general, pale as a ghost, sunk in his chair.
> Chin up, son the old mage laughed patting him on the back. tsk tsk tsk Felix shook his head in a mocking way and Paul couldnt help but laugh out loud. Furious the general jumped up and marched out of the tent. I go and check on him Felix volunteered with a grin. He found the general a little outside of camp sitting on a rock overlooking the valley below them. Felix couldnt help himself _mo ghrá_ he whispered in the generals ear before he sat next to him on the ground. Instead of the growl Felix had expected the general simply sighed. since when? the general finally interrupted the silence. oh, not long Felix stretched his legs out. since about the attack the general nodded. but I think everybody else has been waiting for this for years Felix added with a big grin as the generals head flew around the eyes wide in shock. Now what do I do the general ran both hands through his hair.
> what does a guy normally do after he kissed a girl? Felix wondered. no, you dont understand the general objected forcefully. She is not just a girl true enough Felix agreed though he wondered if the general had ever seen his princess the way he had in the past few weeks. But you are not exactly a regular guy either The general shook his head, thats not true he looked Felix in the face she descended from a long line of nobles he added in a whisper and I dont. Felix shook his head. Here two conundrums met neither of which he could fathom. He did like Selma well enough, but hed rather flick a booger at her before planting a kiss on her, and the business of nobility eluded him completely.


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## Steve

I've written a total of 37 pages so far.  While the writing is rough... it is a first draft after all, the story is coming together well.  I feel very good about who the characters are and that they're acting consistently.  I like the story, too.  So far, I'm pretty stoked and looking forward to writing some more.  I'm sticking a little bit at this point.  The b-story involves a romantic relationship that I'm struggling a little bit with.  I can watch some romantic comedies, but I'm not an expert, so getting the protagonist together with his love interest without being cheesy is proving difficult.  It's important to the plot, so one way or the other, I'm going to have to muscle through it. 

*Summary*:  Mike Jenkins is an out of shape, pre-diabetic 30-something  who's spent the better part of the last decade trying hopelessly to  repair his relationship with his ex-wife and his son.  His ex-wife, Sue,  uses her custody of their son like a weapon, and uses Mike like a free,  on-call babysitter.  His son, Dave, considers Mike a loser, aimless and  alone.
 When Mike sees a group of older boys harassing his son, he  intervenes, using Brazilian Jiu Jitsu skills he'd learned long ago.   Instead of being the hero, Dave's embarrassment at being rescued by his  dad only makes the situation worse.  Mike returns to the mat and begins  training again in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu hoping to compete in the sport he  loves.  Along the way, he discovers that to be the father he wants to be  and earn the respect of his teenage son, he must first learn to respect  himself.

First excerpt is about 15 or so minutes into the movie.  Mike went to pick up his son from school and found him getting beaten up by a larger kid.  His eye was swollen shut and he was having difficulty walking when Mike got him to the car and drove him to the ER.  This is the first real development of the step mom.  She's scared, but the idea is that she (and everyone else) believes that she is the parent, while Mike is... just the dad.

Formatting isn't translating quite right, but hopefully you guys get the idea. 


> Excerpt:
> 
> INT. EMERGENCY ROOM WAITING AREA  EVENING
> Mike sits, head in hands.  A child is crying in the background.  Its a busy ER.  Sue finds Mike and approaches.
> 
> SUE
> Doctor says hes got a mild concussion.  Theyre keeping him overnight.  Want to keep an eye on him.
> MIKE
> Sue, Im sorry.
> SUE
> Hes  worried about the eye.  The doctor said it could be bad.  Wont know  more until the swelling comes down, but he seemed worried, Mike.  I  mean.  Its bad when the doctor seems worried.  Right?
> 
> A long pause.
> 
> MIKE
> Im sure youre just reading too much into it, Sue.  Itll be okay.  Dave will be fine.  Whatd that caseworker want?
> SUE
> Nothing.  It was routine. Just want to make sure Daves okay at home
> 
> Another long pause.  Neither one can look the other in the eye.  Mike studies the floor while Sue looks intently out the window.
> 
> MIKE
> Can I see him?
> SUE
> Hes  sleeping  Hell be on a sleep schedule all night  For the concussion   Thank you, Mike.  Seriously.  Thank you.  Ill call you if anything  changes.
> 
> Sues cell rings, breaking the tension.  Sue turns, talking on the phone, leaving Mike standing alone.


Another excerpt, this one a nod to a Seattle area tradition of including a rubber duckie with devil's horns in the script.  This is the morning after Mike returns to class for the first time to train.  About 25 minutes into the movie.  


> The  sun is coming through the blinds on Mike, sleeping awkwardly on the  couch in the same position he settled into last night.  He tries to  move, but
> 
> Pain  every muscle in his body is  screaming at him.  He struggles to stand, cottonmouth, hungover from  dehydration, he moves into the kitchen and drinks two large glasses of  water
> 
> And now in a hot shower, trying but ultimately failing to wash his face arms unwilling to bend.
> 
> INT. MIKES APARTMENT  EVENING
> Mike  sits, headset on, xbox controller in hand, on the couch with his feet  up on the coffee table, the sleeves on his t-shirt rolled up and his  arms visibly slathered with muscle ointment.  He has an icepack on the  back of his neck, and one balanced on each thigh.  The only things that  are moving are his fingers, his eyes and his mouth.
> 
> MIKE/OG
> and thats all that happened.  I dont think I can do it.
> KILLA (V.O.)
> Come  on, OG.  You have to do it.  Seriously.  This is, like, the coolest  thing Ive ever seen.  Youre like a superhero.  Pitiful loser by day  warrior by night.
> QUEEN (V.O.)
> You sound awful.  What did they do to you?
> MIKE/OG
> Well,  there were sprints and we did some agility drills.  Then, they had this  rubber duckie... a devil duckie.  The guy running the warmups would  fling that duckie at people, and if he hit you, youd have to do 10  burpees.
> FRAG (V.O.)
> Whats a burpee?


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## granfire

you should have posted some of your romantic troubles. Maybe a second eye can give you a pointer on how to muscle through it? (you might be able to find pointers on the forums, too, or ask the SO in your life)


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## Steve

The romantic thing will work itself out.  The story marches on and I'm 52 pages in, fully immersed in the b-plot, anticipating the crash that signifies the move into Act 3.  I'm trying very hard to honor the goal of not editing anything prior to finishing the complete first draft, but it's tough.  I have changed the story a bit, and made significant changes to the supporting characters as I get to know them better.

As I write the story, the characters are becoming more three dimensional, so in the rewrite, I'll be able to strengthen the first act significantly.  Overall, I'm pretty happy.  

Thank you again for bringing this up on the boards.  I had no idea it existed.

So, I'm doing it this year.  Granfire, are you on board?  I haven't heard any updates from you.  And is anyone else going for it this April?  I'd love to hear your ideas.


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## granfire

I am still drawing a complete blank


but I loved how things went for NaNo. I reread it and still liked it.


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## Steve

granfire said:


> I am still drawing a complete blank
> 
> 
> but I loved how things went for NaNo. I reread it and still liked it.


I came up with the logline for the next screenplay I'm going to write:  

_A middle aged mailman decided years ago that hiding mail in his garage was a lot easier than actually delivering it... until one of the letters contained something that would end the lives of millions of people, or save them.  _


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## granfire

stevebjj said:


> I came up with the logline for the next screenplay I'm going to write:
> 
> _A middle aged mailman decided years ago that hiding mail in his garage was a lot easier than actually delivering it... until one of the letters contained something that would end the lives of millions of people, or save them.  _




Sounds like 'Going Postal' 
^_^

(don't read it before you write it though...)


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## CoryKS

stevebjj said:


> I came up with the logline for the next screenplay I'm going to write:
> 
> _A middle aged mailman decided years ago that hiding mail in his garage was a lot easier than actually delivering it... until one of the letters contained something that would end the lives of millions of people, or save them. _


 

Hello, Newman.


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## Steve

Just a quick update.  I'm at 67 pages, wrapping up Act 2.  Looking forward to finishing it up so I can start writing the climactic ending!


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## Steve

82 pages today.  My protagonist got fired from his job.    I didn't see that coming.


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## granfire

ROFLMAO


don't you love it when things turn out different than you thought it should?!


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## Steve

I was just writing out a scene... and then whammo.  He no longer had a job.  This has been a terrific experience.  At 82, I'm getting very close to the bottom, and almost ready to start building to the climax.


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## granfire

stevebjj said:


> I was just writing out a scene... and then whammo.  He no longer had a job.




You didn't see that coming! 

:lol:


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## Carol

OMG...I am not on script frenzy but I have been toying with a story for awhile.  I have about 125 pages so far and I have had many surprises.

I had one of my supporting characters to turn out to be the wrong...gender.  The character I thought was male, and arranges to a work mentor for coffee.  I read over what I wrote, and realize that..duh...this isn't a mentoring meeting, this is a date!  (Shows you how clueless to the world of romance I am :lol And my character is so not a man (not even a gay man...lol), she's a woman....named....Gavin. 

Well....Gavin makes a perfectly good last name...perhaps if I keep writing she'll tell me what her first name is. :rofl:


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## granfire

I think at this time in the game I am going to conceed it...


The format is not familiar (and I could not get the computer to do as I wanted to....)

But I might yet write a script.


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## Carol

I don't know if I will, but I'd really like to get my story finished.  Eventually. LOL.

And I really need a first name for Gavin. LOL.   The protagonist of the story is a talented 16 year old named Leah with a violent home life that she is trying desperately to escape.  After a teacher Leah admires had urged her to "run away" to the world of academia, Leah is now trying desperately to do just that. She has found an ally in Josh, an admissions counselor for a small community college in New England who himself has fought back from a difficult past.  Josh has quietly fallen for Leah based on their telephone interactions, and is hoping upon hope to meet her in person.



> &#8220;I don't get it,&#8221; Josh stormed.
> 
> 
> &#8220;What?&#8221; Gavin called from the corner of the bullpen.
> 
> 
> &#8220;We run advertisements all over the place telling people they can go to college.  We're supposed to tell people calling up working 2 jobs with three kids at home that they can do all of that and go to college.  We have that special offenders program where Professor Guerion and his group go everywhere from the Merrimack Jail to Cedar Junction in an effort to and educate criminals.&#8221;
> 
> &#8220;Josh, you've known from the beginning that this is part of what we do as a community college.  We work with the entire community.&#8221;
> 
> &#8220;That's not...it,&#8221; Josh interrupted, stammering.
> 
> 
> Gavin stared at the young man.  Josh  had spoken with a slight catch in his voice.  The inflection seemed to go deeper than his antics.  Gavin softened her tone.  &#8220;OK.  Its not it.  So, what is 'it', can you help me understand?&#8221;
> 
> Josh shifted his feet uncomfortably.  &#8220;I think what we do is important.  Education is important, and we offer it to some of the people that need it the most.&#8221;
> 
> &#8220;That's right,&#8221; Gavin confirmed.
> 
> 
> &#8220;But we've got an applicant here.  Look at her, she's smart.  She's driven.  She's accomplished.  She's better off, academically, than so many of the students that we already accept.  And we're dragging our feet on this one.&#8221;
> 
> Gavin bristled, but tried to hide her annoyance with Josh.  &#8220;Look, if this is about the commission thing again,&#8221;
> 
> &#8220;No!&#8221;  Josh retorted.  &#8220;Its not about commission or not wanting to do my job.   We have people coming through here that can't speak English or never graduated high school or did hard time, and we're stepping up to give them a chance at education.  What do we have to do to give a girl like Leah an education?   'Sorry, you have to screw up your life first?'   Mark Dudley is trying to build some kind of high school here, so the school is certainly open to the idea of younger students at Pennacook.  Why not her? &#8221;
> 
> 
> A soft electronic beep sounded.  The two were silent.  Gavin's head turned instinctively to the clock.  &#8220;It's Thursday,&#8221; Gavin said apologetically.


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## granfire

gavin does not sound like a bad first name. not even for a girl. After all, there is Robin and Terry and Lesly...

Gut finding the real name is tough. (you could look at the baby name books at the library, names and meanings. or just point at a name in the phone book)


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## granfire

3 more days...how is it coming?


( did try, but the way I want it to look didn't agree with the computer, and then I got hung up and I got to the first scene and the first line...'Oh hello there' Seems like script is not my thing...)


On the other hand, I opened my NaNo story, with the intend to edit a little. Spell check caught a lot, but there are still some glaring mistakes and contenuity problems, I ended up reading the whole story again....going to bed way late at 2AM....)


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## Steve

granfire said:


> 3 more days...how is it coming?
> 
> 
> ( did try, but the way I want it to look didn't agree with the computer, and then I got hung up and I got to the first scene and the first line...'Oh hello there' Seems like script is not my thing...)
> 
> 
> On the other hand, I opened my NaNo story, with the intend to edit a little. Spell check caught a lot, but there are still some glaring mistakes and contenuity problems, I ended up reading the whole story again....going to bed way late at 2AM....)


90 pages down.  I'm going to hunker down tonight and finish if I can after dinner.  I'm just getting into Act 3, so it'll be well over 100 pages when finished.


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## granfire

WELL?????

is it done yet?


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## Steve

Okay.  Sorry.  Here's the scoop.  109 pages in April, so I officially "won" ScriptFrenzy.  

Just finished the story.  115 pages total in the first, rough draft.  I'm going to go through and give it one revision and then share it.  The plan is to write another screen play while my buddies read it.  Then, in a month or so, I'll have another go at revising the story before I decide what to do next.

Overall, I'm really proud of the story I've told, and want to thank you, granfire, for posting about it.  I wouldn't have written this screenplay without this thread.  Literally.  I've been writing all my life, but I've never done anything like this.


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## granfire

artyon:artyon:

Awesome!

You are so welcome! (I like to share things I find fun)
It is a special kind of rush when a creation of yourself comes together in that manner. 

hey, who knows...we might see you as screen writer yet! 
(Water for Elephants, in theaters right now was a NaNoWriMo novel a few years back!)


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## Steve

Didn't know that about Water for Elephants.  That's pretty cool.  I'll say this.  I'm pretty realistic about the entire thing, but I'd be lying if I said that I haven't toyed with how cool selling a screenplay would be.

I figure, I'll write 5 or 10 more and see what happens.


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## Lee Ch'a

Wow. I know this is a late reply coming- But yay I found some fellow screnziers and NaNo'ers!  I stumbled across those sites a few years back and have been trying to write screenplays and novels since.  Always crazy during November and April though, I always have musical performances, so generally run short on time.

Anyway- yeah for writing!  And way to go on finishing- I still haven't yet.
Also, that is really awesome about Water for Elephants; I had no idea.  Hope to see you screnzy/NaNo punks around there in the future!

-Lee


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## Buka

I know you guys don't know me, but I've written and sold a couple of scripts. It's a crazy business, one that you need an "in" with. But it can be done.

You can buy a zillion books on the subject, but the only one that can really help you is this one. Honest.

http://www.amazon.com/Screenwriters-Bible-Complete-Writing-Formatting/dp/1935247026


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## Carol

Buka said:


> I know you guys don't know me, but I've written and sold a couple of scripts. It's a crazy business, one that you need an "in" with. But it can be done.
> 
> You can buy a zillion books on the subject, but the only one that can really help you is this one. Honest.
> 
> http://www.amazon.com/Screenwriters-Bible-Complete-Writing-Formatting/dp/1935247026



Hey you're part of the Martial Talk family now.  Interesting to hear you input.

Just curious, are you still writing?   Personally I am not a serious writer but a good friend of mine has written a few books over the last several years, and is in the process of getting one of them (hopefully) published.


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## granfire

Buka said:


> I know you guys don't know me, but I've written and sold a couple of scripts. It's a crazy business, one that you need an "in" with. But it can be done.
> 
> You can buy a zillion books on the subject, but the only one that can really help you is this one. Honest.
> 
> http://www.amazon.com/Screenwriters-Bible-Complete-Writing-Formatting/dp/1935247026



Does anybody know anybody anyhow?

Script ain't my thing I am afraid but hey, I gave it a shot...maybe more next year.
But hey, tips are always welcome!


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## Buka

Carol said:


> Hey you're part of the Martial Talk family now.  Interesting to hear you input.
> 
> Just curious, are you still writing?   Personally I am not a serious writer but a good friend of mine has written a few books over the last several years, and is in the process of getting one of them (hopefully) published.



Just started a novel. (crime fiction) I don't know if I'll stay with it, I seem to be getting lazy with my free time, screenplays seem to be easier, probably because I'm used to them.

Basic rules of thumb when it comes to screenplays -

1. One page equals one minute of screen time.

2. The three act format....chase a guy up a tree, throw rocks at him, get him down.

3. Romance or romantic comedy....boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy ends up with girl.

4. (the most important) It's all about character. Nobody cares about plot (the people who buy scripts) They only care about character.

As the old joke in Hollywood goes - there's only three rules when writing a script. Unfortunately, nobody knows what the hell they are.


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## Lee Ch'a

Haha, Buka- great thoughts there.  
I am personally more of a NaNo-er than Screnzier, but I love to try both!  Been trying to write novels since age 7.. wish I still had that original, would be sure to give me a good chuckle.
Last script I attempted was to turn the new Karate Kid movie with Jackie Chan into a musical.  Actually got about halfway through before the musical I was currently in took over my life.  Would love to see Jackie Chan in a musical- I was ectastic to discover he could sing!  What a talented guy.

I'm excited for this NaNo season, although with being at college and my intensified MA training I'm not sure how close I'll get to finishing. But maybe, as I've found some other NaNo/Screnziers, I may be encouraged to finish!


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