# Music, Emotion and Memory



## Sukerkin (Jul 30, 2011)

I am sure I am not alone in finding it fascinating and mysterious how it is that music seems so tightly interwoven with the way that we think and feel that a song can have a strong memory associated with it; a memory that resonates even decades on.

These can be both good and bad memories of course.

For example, I was just listening to some old Whitesnake, a band I have always liked who are sometimes brilliant and nearly always good.  This one came on {I've dug a YouTube of it out so I can share} and instantly dropped me back into the misery I felt when a lass I was sure I was going to marry one day said farewell to me:

[yt]8Tp0K9YiTPE[/yt]

Another one that *really* bites deeply is this one:

[yt]MNZOs6nmzUA[/yt]

This transports me back to dancing with a girl who I'd been trying to work up the courage to ask out for months.  Not such a bad memory that part and even as I type this I smile remembering how nervous I was.  When I asked her to dance, this is what we hit the floor to.  She also made my night, when I finally worked up the nerve to see if she wanted to go out some time, by saying she'd been trying to get me to ask her months .  That's the part I hold to when I hear this song, rather than the grief that it tries to make me recall (I have to be careful with this song as it can make me cry in public, which is embarrassing to an Englishman).

EDIT:  I was trying not to make the OP of the thread too 'dark' but I realised as I re-read it that it came across as awfully cryptic.  Why "Just One Kiss" affects me so strongly when I hear it is that the girl was killed in a car accident on her way home that night.  So we never got beyond that one dance and never had that real "first date".


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## Sukerkin (Jul 30, 2011)

In the spirit of Jenna's 'song lyrics' thread, does anyone have some musical triggered memories to share?


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## Sukerkin (Jul 30, 2011)

A more 'lightly toned' memory jogger this one.  It puts me back in the driving seat of my mates Camero driving, in the rain, at night, along deserted single-lane country lanes with towering hedge-banks brushing the car both sides... not exceeding the speed limit obviously :angel:

[yt]obzPPeHgHRQ[/yt]


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## Ken Morgan (Jul 30, 2011)

Meat Loaf- For crying out loud

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVXrLxOTJk4


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## Big Don (Jul 30, 2011)

Always reminds me of her, though I haven't seen her in 20 years
Puts me in a great mood, from my first drinking party
Played at my wedding reception, ergo, not good


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## granfire (Jul 31, 2011)

Yes, interesting.

to this day I cannot listen to a song by Vince Gil: A friend of ours ruined his life in a very short time frame, after waking up emotionally from his divorce. he was seeing a nice lady, was planning to go to a concert with her. She was 15 minutes late, so he picked up the next best tramp to take along and bring home that night. To make it short, they discovered Vince Gil as 'their' artist'
The last thing i heard from him was that he got hooked on hard stuff and went to Walla-Walla for armed robbery and attempted murder....  Everybody around him could see it and warned him.....


Another thing that gets me a bit on the sentimental side: The soundtrack to my MMPORPG in certain areas. it's sweet and lyrical...but it does remind me of the time a few years back when I hung out in that zone after receiving the news at 3AM that my sister's cancer had returned (not that it was a complete surprise, but the distress it caused my mom was terrible)

there is Garth Brooks's 'the dance' it seems to get most people into tears, even if they have no direct emotional connection to the song. 


I am reading a fascinating book right now 'the world in 6 songs' by Daniel Levitin, where he explores how music and song played into the development of the brain and humans as species. It does seem to hinge on the emotions.


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## Jenna (Jul 31, 2011)

Sukerkin said:


> A more 'lightly toned' memory jogger this one.  It puts me back in the driving seat of my mates Camero driving, in the rain, at night, along deserted single-lane country lanes with towering hedge-banks brushing the car both sides... not exceeding the speed limit obviously :angel:
> 
> [yt]obzPPeHgHRQ[/yt]


No WAY would I have imagined you would have listened to Sisters of Mercy! Must have been the car! *impressed* (by the music and not necessarily the car) 

I think most of these songs posted by people lean towards melancholy.  I wonder why is that?


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## Sukerkin (Jul 31, 2011)

I think in part that it might be that we turn to music for 'help' when life is being vile to us.  So a lot of our music-triggered memories will be sad or negative.

Oh and, aye, I'm not really a big Sisters fan (tho' my missus is).  I think Floodlands is a classic album tho' but (as noted about negative memories) I don't own a copy - the reason for that is that I bought it for my best mate as his birthday present.  Again, doesn't sound like a bad memory association but this was my dear friend Dave, who you may have heard me speak of before.  He was killed in a car crash, along with other friends and their girlfriends and I can't really listen to it without those memories coming back.

Life can sometimes seem like it's just one tragedy after another can't it? .

But it isn't ... I shall find some positive memory 'tunes' shortly :tup:.


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## granfire (Jul 31, 2011)

Well, there is that song that helps us cry when things are rough....but there sre those songs that you can't help but smile everytime you hear it.

Then again,a s old age sets in even those happy songs become somewhat sad as we realize that those times have gone and won't ever return.


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## Sukerkin (Jul 31, 2011)

Happy memory one:

[yt]scAOK1Icjyc[/yt]

This brings back the moment, with the impetuousness of youth, I carried my protesting girlfriend out into the middle of the dance floor :lol:.  She wouldn't dance, you see, so I decided a bit of shock therapy might help :angel:.  She was a bit of a stunner (imagine biker-hippy/geek-Elvira) and I don't think all the wolf-whistles from the 'crowd' helped much when it came to getting over her phobia of not being a wall-flower .


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## granfire (Jul 31, 2011)

Sukerkin said:


> Happy memory one:
> 
> [yt]scAOK1Icjyc[/yt]
> 
> This brings back the moment, with the impetuousness of youth, I carried my protesting girlfriend out into the middle of the dance floor :lol:.  She wouldn't dance, you see, so I decided a bit of shock therapy might help :angel:.  She was a bit of a stunner (imagine biker-hippy/geek-Elvira) and I don't think all the wolf-whistles from the 'crowd' helped much when it came to getting over her phobia of not being a wall-flower .



LOL!!!

A girl too pretty to be confident?







utter mayhem in the Disco....the fad was to propel yourself across the dance floor (usually packed....) which eventually resultesd in the club prohibiting that and raising the small dancefloor by about 2 inches....


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## Jenna (Jul 31, 2011)

granfire said:


> LOL!!!
> 
> A girl too pretty to be confident?


Lol, Hey gran do you think Suke is recalling his workplace daydreams again?  

I am just joking Suke, it is good (and rare thing) that you are a man to take the lead on the dancefloor! I like that 



granfire said:


> utter mayhem in the Disco....the fad was to propel yourself across the dance floor (usually packed....) which eventually resultesd in the club prohibiting that and raising the small dancefloor by about 2 inches....


The uploader has not made this video available in my country  Boo to the uploader then I say! What is the song please gran???


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## granfire (Jul 31, 2011)

I just can't get enough by depeche mode

EARLY works


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## Sukerkin (Apr 5, 2012)

Bit of a zombie thread moment here, bringing back one of my own.

Link surfing YouTube again brought me to:

[yt]CB17uWuBrL0[/yt]

Another one of those songs that it is 'dangerous' for me to listen to in public for it puts me in mind of my dear friend David, who fell in with the wrong people and would not listen to me when I tried to tell him so.  We fell out over it and all too soon after it, before we could heal that rift, he was dead - I have always blamed myself for not trying harder to guide him away from the drugs scene and that, as well as the sheer truth of my missing my friend, means that anything that makes me think of those days has an embarrassing (for an Englishman) affect on my tear ducts.

As with my thread about Heart, talent endures.  Here are Kansas many years on and still sounding fabulous:

[yt]PVH-u9gIy8s[/yt]


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## granfire (Apr 5, 2012)

I love the song.

As to your friend....my heart goes out to you.

but having experienced something of similar nature, I am pretty sure short of hog tieing him and throwing him into a confined rehab clinic, you were tilting windmills.

It is incredibly painful to watch a friend self-destruct, against all reason and better judgement.


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## shesulsa (Apr 5, 2012)

Oh, there are many. Many, many, many.

This one gets me crying every single time. Though the song was written about a Vietnam veteran who couldn't go on living in the states after the war, the song was shortened to its published version and is more generic.  

For me, it is the heart song I sing for my brother who has been through brilliant hell, my love for him along with it. It is the wont for the relationship I wanted to have with him but never could.

The originally released version of "Daniel" by Elton John
[yt]UA78e27R_J4[/yt]


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## granfire (Apr 5, 2012)

It described the relationship my sister had with me. 
And I lost her, and my heart broke.... 

And nothing I could say or do had any effect.


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## Carol (Apr 5, 2012)

(((hugs Gran)))


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## shesulsa (Apr 6, 2012)

granfire said:


> It described the relationship my sister had with me.
> And I lost her, and my heart broke....
> 
> And nothing I could say or do had any effect.



So sorry, Gran. :-(


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## Jenna (Apr 6, 2012)

Sukerkin said:


> Bit of a zombie thread moment here, bringing back one of my own.
> 
> Link surfing YouTube again brought me to:
> 
> ...


There is nothing embarrasing about feeling emotion I do not care how tough you all are up North!   That your friendship made such an impact means that any tear shed on David's behalf is a testament to the person he was and always will be in your safely-kept memories of your mate.  I am grateful that you can share here.  Thank you.  I agree with Gran, it is normal that you blame yourself, yet if the roles were reversed, you would not want a mate blaming himself, yes? You are only human as is he, we all have our coping mechanisms and our flaws.  It is not his fault that he did what he did.  It is not yours that you could not stop him.  It is what it is.  Memories and positive experiences can never die though  I am glad you (and others here) have such lovely songs to help keep those memories fresh.

Sad songs remind me of loss.  Sometimes dwelling inside sad songs is needed for consolation.  I think I like to balance that with the silly and stupid and happy and positive songs that were also part of those times   I specially like a song that reminds me of the loss and of the happy that went before it and of the memory that I keep safe all in one.  




You are all in my thoughts, Jx


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## Jenna (Apr 6, 2012)

granfire said:


> It described the relationship my sister had with me.
> And I lost her, and my heart broke....
> 
> And nothing I could say or do had any effect.



Goodness.. I have been listening to this song on a loop for the last few days!!  That was a weird when I clicked that.

Gran you are right, there are no words to account for having someone so close moved away so far.  You have not lost her though.

All my wishes to you, Jx


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## granfire (Apr 6, 2012)

Jenna said:


> Goodness.. I have been listening to this song on a loop for the last few days!!  That was a weird when I clicked that.
> 
> Gran you are right, there are no words to account for having someone so close moved away so far.  You have not lost her though.
> 
> All my wishes to you, Jx




Thank you so much for your kind words.
Sadly there is no chance of reconsiliation, since she passed away 4 years ago.


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## Jenna (Apr 6, 2012)

granfire said:


> Thank you so much for your kind words.
> Sadly there is no chance of reconsiliation, since she passed away 4 years ago.


I would not speak platitude against such a wound at your core and but in my heart death is not a bond broken rather it is an elastic link stretched very far.  As far as it will go, right to its limit.  Yet it is not broken though because those bonds do not break.   My wishes are with you my friend.


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## Sukerkin (Apr 6, 2012)

To show that not all powerful musical memories have to be sad, here are the two tracks I used to play (on cassette ) prior to every BattleTech session me and my friends had.  They must've had some effect for I 'fought' something like two thousand table-top engagements (from Lance skirmishes all the way up to full Mech battalions with conventional armour and artillery support) and I lost ... once or twice (I argue that one of those was a draw, especially as I was holding off both House Steiner and House Liao at the same time and still managed to get a functioning force off the board ).

[yt]RyFhsyxnAlU[/yt]

In this case the three pretenders are House Liao, House Kurita and House Steiner ... I was House Davion of course :lol:

[yt]Jddg2PcVxb4[/yt]

Fortune favours ... Captain Dallas Sukerkin, Merchant Adventurers Company, Thackstones Battalion, Third Crucis Lancers, House Davion .

The fun and intensity of those games has stayed with me for fifteen to twenty years - very good times indeed.


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## shesulsa (Apr 7, 2012)

This one gets me going when the coffee won't.

[yt]os0F4-XFf6w[/yt]


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