# One good thing, one bad thing ABOUT YOU (Lurkers welcome)



## Bill Mattocks (Feb 8, 2012)

I am starting this thread by suggestion (thanks, MA-Caver):

http://www.martialtalk.com/forum/showthread.php?101099-I-m-Human

I'm modifying his thought just a tad.  Instead of posting just one honest thing about yourself, post one honest thing that you see as a negative and one honest thing you see as a positive about yourself.  No commenting on other people's statements, but read them and add your own.  They don't have to be unique; if yours are the same as someone else's, no problem.  Feel free to come back and add two more items to the list later on.  No explanations needed or asked for in this thread; just 'hit and git' so to speak.

I'll start.  This is me being honest about myself:

*Good: I'm funny.
Bad: I'm bombastic.*

Your turn.  De-lurk and add yours.  One good, one bad.  No judgment here.  Just say it and move on.  We are all human and we are all flawed jewels.


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## harlan (Feb 8, 2012)

:angel:  I'm direct.

:hammer: And politically insensitive.


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## Twin Fist (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: I can laugh about anything
Bad: i sometimes lack compassion


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## Cyriacus (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: I am generally good natured and jolly.
Bad: I can take some things way too seriously.


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## Steve (Feb 8, 2012)

Bad:  I'm very stubborn.

Good:  I'm very stubborn.


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## WC_lun (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: I can relate with just about anyone.

Bad:  I have little patience with what I view as stupidity.


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## ballen0351 (Feb 8, 2012)

Im funny 

I can be very moody towards my loved ones


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## oaktree (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: I do my best to make my action speech and
Thought to help others.
bad: sometimes I slip in my efforts.


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## decepticon (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: I genuinely care about people and like most of them

Bad: I have so many responsibilities that I often feel depressed and overwhelmed


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## elder999 (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: I'm from_ New York._
Bad: I'm from* New York*.
:lol:


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## Sukerkin (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: Intelligent, perceptive and well read
Bad: Quick to forgive, slow to forget (so that's not really forgiveness)


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## sfs982000 (Feb 8, 2012)

Good:  Very easy going and easy to get along with

Bad: Very sarcastic


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## Carol (Feb 8, 2012)

Good:  I'm an intelligent person
Bad:  I don't always appreciate the people around me as much as I should


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## Blindside (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: Usually ID the practical answer to a new problem very quickly.
Bad: Tend to be overly conservative, as in I tend to stick with what I know works, rather than continuously looking for better solutions to old (solved) problems.


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## Gemini (Feb 8, 2012)

I'm often empathetic.
I'm seldom sympathetic.

Yea, it confuses me too.


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## ballen0351 (Feb 8, 2012)

Carol said:


> Bad:  I don't always appreciate the people around me as much as I should



I too am very guilty of that


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## David43515 (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: I`m extremely kind-hearted.

Bad:  I`m very irresponsable with money.


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## Dirty Dog (Feb 8, 2012)

Good: I'm bright, well read, sometimes funny and compassionate.

Bad: I suffer fools badly and can be overly cynical.


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## shesulsa (Feb 9, 2012)

:angel:   I am perseverent.

 :s18:    I can be gullible.


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## Makalakumu (Feb 9, 2012)

Good - I'm disciplined.
Bad - I'm obsessive.


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## Gnarlie (Feb 9, 2012)

Good - I'm capable of making other people feel really special
Bad - I'm lazy, so prefer to keep a distance


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## Aikikitty (Feb 9, 2012)

Good--I'm encouraging to others and have a lot of goals I want to accomplish.

Bad--I can be lazy and sometimes put off or give up if something gets to hard.


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## MA-Caver (Feb 9, 2012)

Good: Been told I have integrity
Bad: Rages denial at what my inner-self is telling me.


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## Em MacIntosh (Feb 9, 2012)

Good: I look forward to strife and hard times as my chance to shine.
Bad: I'm very technical and out of touch with my emotions.


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## Buka (Feb 9, 2012)

Good - I speak fluent dog. All breeds.
Bad - I tend to take people at their word and feel sad when they don't do as they say.


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## Xue Sheng (Feb 10, 2012)

Good thing: I am awesome

Bad thing: Im too modest


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## Sukerkin (Feb 10, 2012)

:splutters into his tea:

Xue!  I am sad to say my friend that you will never be reborn as an Englishman until that lack of self-deprecation is atoned for :lol:.


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## seasoned (Feb 10, 2012)

(1) I'm in great shape
(2) I'm old

Now some people will say "your only as old as you feel", which don't change the fact. 
To them I would say "lets trade". 

All kidding aside, I have a great deal to be thankful for, of which I am very much.........


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## wushuguy (Feb 10, 2012)

good: I'm brutally sarcastically honest.
bad: I'm sincerely polite.

And if all else fails... insanity spreads at a ludicrous speed.


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## ETinCYQX (Feb 10, 2012)

Good: I love what I do.

Bad: I take my family for granted waaayyyy too much.


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## Jenna (Feb 11, 2012)

To recognise a bad point is a wonderfully introspective and positive thing and I think everyone that contributed deserved praise for it, yet even your perceived bad points can be adjusted I think by your perspective, no? Please please pardon my presumptuousness that I do not know any of you truly, I am not wanting to be facetious and sincerely hope this does not offend anyone.. 

*@Bill Mattocks*, bombastic implies showmanship I think so be bombastic and do not miss this vocational calling! Thespianism? Club Raconteur? Author?

*@Harlan*, political insensitivity reflects true human nature like the innocence of a child.  Too much political correctness I think can be affectation.  Be insensitive and know you cannot account for the thoughts of others.

*@Twin Fist*, lack of compassion is merely a superficial sentiment.  It is not necessary to have compassion for everyone.  I mean, protectors are not overtly compassionate.  Their compassion is found in their defence of others.  

*@Cyriacus*, taking things seriously shows diligence and conscientiousness and those traits are harder learned than joviality.  I think when you take life seriously you will achieve your goals.  At that point everything can be frivolity.

*@Steve*, you have beat me to it  stubbornness has multiple connotations depending upon how it is perceived.  Smartypants 

*@WC_lun*, having patience with stupidity is only necessary if you wish to commune with the stupid.  I say perhaps yours is to lead with thought and action.  If you teach the incompetent then no longer will there be the stupid for you to endure.

*@ballen0351*, if you were eternally chirpy with loved ones they would not cope as admirably as they do with the world as it is.  The world is temperamental and it is right to know how to manage this and regular cheer from within the gloom is all that is needed to sustain this management.  Demonstrate (even despite yourself) that surliness does not preclude love and all will be well.

*@oaktree*, there can be no better than to do your best.  No matter the outcome, your best is always good enough.

*@decepticon*, to have responsibilities is a sign of respect and among those that have entrusted you with those duties and there is pride to be taken in holding that position and a self-worth that comes from providing a satisfaction in their discharge. If you care about people they may be likewise compassionate.  In which case ask for help in lightening your load.

*@elder999*, the town is surely defined by the citizens.  It is true then that you are one of those that helped to make NY great.

*@Sukerkin*, how often I have thought that the greatest Christian spirit is from the atheist. And being slow to forget is prudent.  No experience can be ingrained if it cannot be retained I think 

*@sfs982000*, sarcasm is the lowest form of wit only to those that do not comprehend it.  I say take heart from being in the 75th percentile.

*@Carol*, not appreciating people in no way equates to lack of compassion or love and but suggests that you appreciate other aspects of life.  If a person is not as engrossing as some other aspect then they are perhaps due less appreciation. Draw out from them what interests you, then you will have greater incentive to give appreciation for those things to those people 

*@Blindside*, solved problems are no longer problems, they are potential efficiencies and so your time as Ace Problem Solver is better employed in the solution of new problems.  Problem solved.

*@Gemini*, not everyone is deserving of sympathy; empathy is eternally sufficient.

*@David43515*, treating money with contempt is faultless if you treat life with respect I think.

*@Dirty Dog*, forego the fools and surround yourself with wits, and remember that healthy cynicism is device that will safeguard you, your family and your possessions.

*@Shesulsa*, to admit gullibility to yourself is to acknowledge trustworthiness.  That some subsequently prove theirselves unworthy of trust is a fault of theirs and not yours.

*@Makalakumu*, genius is nothing without the obsession to realise the fruits of that genius.

*@Gnarlie*, keeping distance is prudent in matters of one's own safety.  Allowing access to you on your terms will facilitate your natural people gifts. 
*
@Aikikitty*, laziness is human nature and only through laziness have we become so technologically advanced. Not all mountains can be moved and recognition of this is not to give up when something is hard and but is recognition of what is possible and what implies time more profitably spent elsewhere.  

*@MA_Caver*, self-denial is the route to nirvana some would say. Still even the ascetic can find pleasure in small things. When the intersection between the two is apparent then you are on the right track.

*@Em MacIntosh*, that you have thought of your emotions implies that you are not out of touch with them.  And expression of that emotion is not practical nor suitable for every context.  Keep no lid upon your emotion and allow your propriety to dictate their expression and you will not go wrong.

*@Buka*, Pride yourself in your ability to trust, know that you cannot control anyone else and if they recant their promise then remain happy that you have kept yours and have consistent integrity.

*@XS*, when you are the best, all that remains to work on is magnanimity and I bet you are probably world's best at that also 

*@seasoned*, with age, wisdom, this is not in doubt.

*@wushuguy*, and your respectfulness will not only gain you dependable friends and will advance your goals, it will also protect you against unnecessary antagonism. I like politeness.

*@ETinCYQX*, Taking for granted is a sign of comfort and trust. Acknowledge their individuality and then watch how your mindset changes even while your level of comfort and trust in your family need not.


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## Flea (Feb 11, 2012)

Good: I am perfect in every way.

Bad: I am overly modest.  

:ultracool


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## Bill Mattocks (Feb 11, 2012)

Jenna said:


> *@Bill Mattocks*, bombastic implies showmanship I think so be bombastic and do not miss this vocational calling! Thespianism? Club Raconteur? Author?



I listed it as a negative trait because I often use it to bludgeon people and pound them into the ground verbally.  A bully using language as a weapon is still a bully.  It's a charge that's been leveled at me from time to time, and it's not unfair to say there is some truth in it.  I use words like a sword, and sometimes I hurt people.  It's not a good thing.


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## granfire (Feb 11, 2012)

Bill Mattocks said:


> I listed it as a negative trait because I often use it to bludgeon people and pound them into the ground verbally.  A bully using language as a weapon is still a bully.  It's a charge that's been leveled at me from time to time, and it's not unfair to say there is some truth in it.  I use words like a sword, and sometimes I hurt people.  It's not a good thing.



It  depends on the context.
Some people deserve to be cut to shreds by the spoken (and written) word.


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## Jenna (Feb 12, 2012)

Bill Mattocks said:


> I listed it as a negative trait because I often use it to bludgeon people and pound them into the ground verbally.  A bully using language as a weapon is still a bully.  It's a charge that's been leveled at me from time to time, and it's not unfair to say there is some truth in it.  I use words like a sword, and sometimes I hurt people.  It's not a good thing.


I appreciate what you are saying and it is not unusual.  Having some therapeutic experience I know that keeping objectivity while honestly acknowledging your disposition, action or demeanour as you, and others that have posted here, have done is difficult and courageous in itself and which is why I wanted to praise you and all that have recognised their own perhaps less than positive traits, all of which are understandable human behaviours.  Efficient forward motion away from a troublesome or unfavourable state is only possible after this acknowledgement which is why these outwardly trivial posts are to be lauded.  

And but while you and others will admit that it is a characteristic that warrants change, it is ALWAYS possible to reframe these "negative" issues using more pragmatic thought.  Seeing the issue as being less rigidly defined allows us to reshape it in a number of ways.  

For example, it is generally possible to extract positive notions from even conflicted, paradoxical and destructive behaviours such as that which you have eloquently described. It was not meant as facetious to suggest focussing your oratorical virtuosity towards what in your opinion is some less destructive alternative deployment, or towards an outcome which is approbative for more acceptable reasons.  This deployment need not be any less satisfying to you or feel any less natural to you than the former destructive end.  I would say that predispositions and preset behaviour can be easily put into flux to make them variable through any number of simple methods.

Anyway, I am sorry if that is too much for just here... I am sorry as praise was my intention not forum incoherence and babbling.  Commendations to you and to all for self-honesty and courage in revelation, Jenna


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