# What’s the worst bit of advice you’ve ever received?



## Chrisinmd (Oct 21, 2020)

What’s the worst bit of advice you’ve ever received?

Did you know it was bad advice at the time or did you have to try it and learn this was not going to work for you?


----------



## jobo (Oct 21, 2020)

Chrisinmd said:


> What’s the worst bit of advice you’ve ever received?
> 
> Did you know it was bad advice at the time or did you have to try it and learn this was not going to work for you?


dont go running after her, she come back on her own
.bullies are all cowards
put your money in the bank it will be safe there
dont worry about that engine noise , its nothing

yea just leave your bike in the garden no one will nick it round here

yes, its that way to the,station

the bosses dont mind if you have the afternoon off to go chismass shopping

beer tins float, just put them in the lake to keep them cool

just stand here and watch for the police,  no one will know you were involved

these speed traps cameras are all dummies

just say your a friend of mine and they will let you in,

if you climb to the top of that big hill youl get a phone signal

and that just off the top of my head, there is more, much much more


----------



## dvcochran (Oct 21, 2020)

Don't waste you money on Apple.


----------



## Buka (Oct 22, 2020)

Go to Boston Latin School.


----------



## Bruce7 (Oct 22, 2020)

My cousin join the Navy and got medical to get out of boot.
Later he became a fireman at the airport. Vietnam War was on so they let him join the air force and 24 years later he retired.
I told him I wanted to join the Navy,  He told me Navy boot was hell, join the air force boot is easy.
Everyday in boot camp, I thought I was pretty stupid for not taking his advice.
Once I got out of boot camp, I was glad I did not follow his advice.


----------



## hoshin1600 (Oct 25, 2020)

instead of fighting with this bully, why dont you try talking to him and if that doesnt work tell a teacher
you should go to a trade school rather than college, that way you always have something to fall back on.
take out a 2nd home loan to pay off your credit cards and other debt.
just pull out
if you work hard while at work the boss will notice and promote you.
If you join our Multi Level Market business you will be a millionaire, it only costs a few thousand to join.
i know this financial guy named Bernie Madoff,  you can trust him.
we can just roll your current car payment into the new car payment but your monthly cost will stay at $250. a month
(2017) home prices always go up. the monthly payment on this house may be a stretch now but in a few years you will have the equity to refinance before that balloon payment thingy.
(1970) the food pyramid says you need 6 to 11 servings of bread, cereal or pasta a day
_Anything that is followed by _ "whats the worst that could happen"


----------



## Chrisinmd (Oct 28, 2020)

hoshin1600 said:


> you should go to a trade school rather than college, that way you always have something to fall back on.



That is good advice actually to go to a trade school.  A good tradesmen will always have work and it can pay very well.  Not for everyone but it is good advice.


----------



## hoshin1600 (Oct 30, 2020)

Chrisinmd said:


> That is good advice actually to go to a trade school.  A good tradesmen will always have work and it can pay very well.  Not for everyone but it is good advice.


Having actually followed that advise I disagree. My mother gave me that little nugget of advise and while is sounds good, the reality didn't match up. 
1st many kids that go to a trade school actually never follow a career in their chosen trade. Second the subliminal message is "rather than reach for the stars ,and try to fulfill your potential, let's aim your life at a low target and hope you get a job"
Tradesmen make good money and are great jobs and maybe in today's society going to a trade school is good advise when looking at the results the university is producing but sacrificing your future with low expectations is what I was really getting at


----------



## dvcochran (Oct 30, 2020)

hoshin1600 said:


> Having actually followed that advise I disagree. My mother gave me that little nugget of advise and while is sounds good, the reality didn't match up.
> 1st many kids that go to a trade school actually never follow a career in their chosen trade. Second the subliminal message is "rather than reach for the stars ,and try to fulfill your potential, let's aim your life at a low target and hope you get a job"
> Tradesmen make good money and are great jobs and maybe in today's society going to a trade school is good advise when looking at the results the university is producing but sacrificing your future with low expectations is what I was really getting at


Certainly this could be a difference in countries but the math fleshes out quite well for trade school and trade jobs. Over the span of a 30 year career a person who completed a 4 year university degree versus a trade school graduate is only $90k. So about $3,000/yr in salary. The average trade school cost $33,000. The average 4 year University costs $102,000 worldwide (very different in the US). So the average person will be negative $60k making the increased income for a career lifetime from going to University more like $30k. 
Here is the biggest reality in my opinion. WAY too many people still go to university/college expecting to be spoon fed and leave with a higher skill set than the next person. Foolish thinking and not reality. Sadly this scale has ben sliding negatively for around 2 decades.
Yes, the income for a tradesman/woman is a flatter curve on average. But Statistically, people 5 years out of college follow their college degree only %32 of the time and are far below their expected income. Trade school grads 5 years out are following their discipline 71% of the time and satisfied with their income. Whether a person goes to university, trade school, or only finishes high school, it is the people who have been taught good work ethic and who go out and works their butts off that are successful and happy. 
When I was young, I had a very non focused career for a while. I went to college for three years out or high school. It did not cost me anything (sports scholarship) but didn't really gain me anything financially. We are 3rd generation beef farmers so that has always been there. After & during college I did several different trade skill jobs like mechanic and pipe fitter. Then I was a LEO for a while. All this is about a 12 year span. Also during this span I bought my first commercial properties. Eventually I successfully got into my desired field, and later on went back to school to complete 2 Masters degrees. But that was as much for me a personal accomplishment as a career move. And I doubt I would have done it had the company I worked for at the time not paid for all of it. 
My point to make with this is that it is okay not to have one specific direction as long as you are moving forward in a good direction and that is Very, Very important to embrace the reality that it is up to the individual, not the university or trade school to be successful. Either school is only a tool to use. Knowing how to use it is up to you.  
Sorry for the rambling but it is a hard point to make with some people.


----------



## Chrisinmd (Oct 30, 2020)

hoshin1600 said:


> The subliminal message is "rather than reach for the stars ,and try to fulfill your potential, let's aim your life at a low target and hope you get a job"
> Tradesmen make good money and are great jobs and maybe in today's society going to a trade school is good advise when looking at the results the university is producing but sacrificing your future with low expectations is what I was really getting at



Not sure that becoming a tradesman such as a master plumber or electrician is setting a low target or low expectations.  Sounds like a bit of elitist statement to me.  Dividing people with white collar jobs against people with blue collar jobs.


----------



## dvcochran (Oct 30, 2020)

hoshin1600 said:


> Having actually followed that advise I disagree. My mother gave me that little nugget of advise and while is sounds good, the reality didn't match up.
> 1st many kids that go to a trade school actually never follow a career in their chosen trade. Second the subliminal message is "rather than reach for the stars ,and try to fulfill your potential, let's aim your life at a low target and hope you get a job"
> Tradesmen make good money and are great jobs and maybe in today's society going to a trade school is good advise when looking at the results the university is producing but sacrificing your future with low expectations is what I was really getting at


Whew! Have you ever bought completely into the "you must go to college to be someone" lie.


----------



## dvcochran (Oct 30, 2020)

Chrisinmd said:


> Not sure that becoming a tradesman such as a master plumber or electrician is setting a low target or low expectations.  Sounds like a bit of elitist statement to me.  Dividing people with white collar jobs against people with blue collar jobs.


Funny thing is at some point many of the master plumbers, electricians, etc... end up running a crew, project, or even a whole company. Sounds like suspiciously like being a manager/director of an IT or similar department/division. 
Some people really need to get outside their small world.


----------



## hoshin1600 (Oct 30, 2020)

while i did make a few comical references in my list of bad advise, 
please pay attention to the fact that the question was worst advise *YOU *have ever received
so Chris you can stuff it.
i am in no way belittling trades men,  the fact is ,,, *I WAS TOLD * to go to trade school.  *i should have *gone to college,
in my own particular case i took welding ,, never wanted to be a welder.  the school put me there and if i wanted to change classes, i would have had to repeat a grade to do so. i never worked in that trade, never wanted to.  all said and done i am a manager in a manufacturing plant that supplies the semi conductor industry.  not having a degree has held me back and so many doors would have been open if i had gone through more education,  bottom line is i hated school and didnt want to go.  but it wasnt the right decision,  my parents should have pushed me to go.


----------



## dvcochran (Oct 31, 2020)

hoshin1600 said:


> while i did make a few comical references in my list of bad advise,
> please pay attention to the fact that the question was worst advise *YOU *have ever received
> so Chris you can stuff it.
> i am in no way belittling trades men,  the fact is ,,, *I WAS TOLD * to go to trade school.  *i should have *gone to college,
> in my own particular case i took welding ,, never wanted to be a welder.  the school put me there and if i wanted to change classes, i would have had to repeat a grade to do so. i never worked in that trade, never wanted to.  all said and done i am a manager in a manufacturing plant that supplies the semi conductor industry.  not having a degree has held me back and so many doors would have been open if i had gone through more education,  bottom line is i hated school and didnt want to go.  but it wasnt the right decision,  my parents should have pushed me to go.


My apologies, but I know it doesn't work well that way if at all. It isn't your parents fault that you hated school and that you did not get a degree. Whether it was your school pushing you to take a course you did not want to take or your parents pushing you through college, because of your attitude toward school at the time it was never going to result in anything of value. 
I didn't finish my college degrees until my late 30's but when it became enough of an issue to be a real problem for me at work I went back and finished. I will not bore you with the story of how busy my life was back then but suffice it to say it was 100 hour weeks for a long time.  
Again, this my be a difference in educational systems but we also had a trade school avenue in high school. It wasn't a requirement but many good programs. Like you, I know a lot of folks that tried a craft and did not like it. We also have what is commonly called Vocational school post high school. I imagine it is what you think of as trade school. I have been a guest teacher in the Mechatronics class and can tell you there are usually several kids there simply because they don't know what they want to do yet and are tool lazy or entitled to go to work. This is the scenario that is never going to work well whether they are in trade school or university. 
You know, some of the best lessons we learn are the ones that teach us what Not to do. That sounds like what your welding class experience was. I Hope you are doing the kind of work you enjoy and that it all worked out.


----------



## Graywalker (Oct 31, 2020)

All people, deep down inside, are basically good.

Experience has shown me, that this is the other way around.


----------



## hoshin1600 (Oct 31, 2020)

dvcochran said:


> My apologies, but I know it doesn't work well that way if at all. It isn't your parents fault that you hated school and that you did not get a degree. Whether it was your school pushing you to take a course you did not want to take or your parents pushing you through college, because of your attitude toward school at the time it was never going to result in anything of value.
> I didn't finish my college degrees until my late 30's but when it became enough of an issue to be a real problem for me at work I went back and finished. I will not bore you with the story of how busy my life was back then but suffice it to say it was 100 hour weeks for a long time.
> Again, this my be a difference in educational systems but we also had a trade school avenue in high school. It wasn't a requirement but many good programs. Like you, I know a lot of folks that tried a craft and did not like it. We also have what is commonly called Vocational school post high school. I imagine it is what you think of as trade school. I have been a guest teacher in the Mechatronics class and can tell you there are usually several kids there simply because they don't know what they want to do yet and are tool lazy or entitled to go to work. This is the scenario that is never going to work well whether they are in trade school or university.
> You know, some of the best lessons we learn are the ones that teach us what Not to do. That sounds like what your welding class experience was. I Hope you are doing the kind of work you enjoy and that it all worked out.


I should make it clear that I believe in ownership for our lives.  I am not complaining about my life. I have done quite well.  I didn't join the military even though at 17 I wanted to go into special forces. When I recount this to others I hesitate to say that I regret not doing so. Because we are never sure of the outcome. Had I joined, the probability of me being dead would be quite high.  but if I had joined it would have been an advantage in my ambition of working as law enforcement and later looking into being an Air marshal. Both of which obviously never happened.
The thread is supposed to be about bad advise. For my personal journey that was trade school because I never used it. BUT for others that could have been just as valid for college or university. I would say more so.  many kids are graduating unable to get a job and so many useless degrees out there all while being thousands in debt.  They are starting their lives in a negative position.


----------



## dvcochran (Oct 31, 2020)

Graywalker said:


> All people, deep down inside, are basically good.
> 
> Experience has shown me, that this is the other way around.


I still believe it is more than 50% good. Glass half full and al.


----------



## hoshin1600 (Nov 1, 2020)

good and bad is context dependent.  malevolent, now thats something all together different.


----------



## dvcochran (Nov 1, 2020)

hoshin1600 said:


> good and bad is context dependent.  malevolent, now thats something all together different.


Okay, so let's stay with the '50% of people are bad'. Of this number what percentage do you think are 'malevolent?

ma·lev·o·lent
/məˈlevələnt/

_adjective_

having or showing a wish to do evil to others.
You are coming at this like you really believe a large majority of people are going around with this intent. Now, lets help understand your perspective. 
Your friend pulls a practical joke. Evil? 
Someone accidently steps on your foot. Evil? 
Someone accidentally hits your car. Evil? 
Your boss did not give you the promotion. Evil?
A regular at the pub/bar has a few too many and decides to throw a punch at you. Evil?
Someone tries to rob you. Evil?
Someone tries to do bodily harm or kill you. Evil?

This list could go on for a very long time. And it is likely that each line is interpreted differently by each person reading it. So when talking about it from an individual point of view or in specifics, the word malevolent seldom ever comes up. When looking at society corporately it could be used as a valid term, albeit a bit dated.


----------



## hoshin1600 (Nov 1, 2020)

dvcochran said:


> Okay, so let's stay with the '50% of people are bad'. Of this number what percentage do you think are 'malevolent?
> 
> ma·lev·o·lent
> /məˈlevələnt/
> ...


Honestly I have no idea what your talking about. I made a simple comment about good and bad being dependent on the view point of the observer and it seems like you took it overly serious and way further than I intended.  Sorry not interested in continuing this further.


----------



## skribs (Nov 4, 2020)

A couple of pieces I've heard (and rejected).


"Just tell your dentist you're not going to pay any fee for missing your appointment, and if he still wants to charge you, ask for your records and find a new dentist."  I asked what the fee was, and they waived it because I'd been a customer of theirs for 20 years and never missed an appointment before.
"Just do Taekwondo until you get your black belt, then do something else, because you won't learn anything else after that."  I'm a 3rd degree now, and I'm still learning.  I do agree that I might have a more explosive growth if I learn something else, but I'm clearly not done learning.


----------



## Chrisinmd (Nov 11, 2020)

skribs said:


> A couple of pieces I've heard (and rejected).
> 
> 
> "Just tell your dentist you're not going to pay any fee for missing your appointment, and if he still wants to charge you, ask for your records and find a new dentist."  I asked what the fee was, and they waived it because I'd been a customer of theirs for 20 years and never missed an appointment before.



Just asked the secretary at my dentist office to waive my missed appointment fee as well.  She went right ahead and did it.  I think the advice would most likely work to get them to waive the fee though.  I think you can only use that type of threat once though


----------



## Kung Fu Wang (Nov 11, 2020)

Chrisinmd said:


> What’s the worst bit of advice you’ve ever received?
> 
> Did you know it was bad advice at the time or did you have to try it and learn this was not going to work for you?


1. Always keep your head vertical and never bend down - If there is a $100 bill on the ground, you will miss the chance to bend over and pick it up.
2. Never move your gravity center to be outside of your base - There will be no momentum if you don't move your gravity center to be outside of your base.
3. Never sweet when you train - Whoever gives you this advice must be a lazy person.
4. If you don't move, I won't move - If both you and your opponent don't want to move first, both of you will starve to death.
5. Use 5 oz to deal with 1000 lb - If you have 1000 lb, you won't care about 5 oz.
6. There is someone lives in the Herman's Peak who can easily beat up Mike Tyson - If you have not sparred for 3 days, your arms and legs will no longer be yours.


----------



## Chrisinmd (Jan 12, 2021)

Most of the advice i got was from the "real men" generation so you can imagine.

"Stop being a *****"
"Be happy, no one likes depressed people who mope around"
"Just go out there and act tough and don't take ****"


You know, that kind of stuff.

"Pull yourself up from your bootstraps" narratives are a curse upon humanity. I've seen that same narrative be turned around on people when they finally are put into a situation where they've become someone else's periphery, and they expect empathy--and no one cares to listen to them.

What's sad is, is that generation is essentially just carrying around the voice of their parents, who likely were either physically/emotionally abusing them, or both.


----------



## Monkey Turned Wolf (Jan 12, 2021)

skribs said:


> A couple of pieces I've heard (and rejected).
> 
> 
> "Just tell your dentist you're not going to pay any fee for missing your appointment, and if he still wants to charge you, ask for your records and find a new dentist."  I asked what the fee was, and they waived it because I'd been a customer of theirs for 20 years and never missed an appointment before.


I can't imagine leaving a dentist that I've gone to for 20 years over what probably amounts to a $25 missed appointment fee. There are definitely reasons that I might switch, but that is nowhere near the list.


----------



## Kung Fu Wang (Jan 12, 2021)

Chrisinmd said:


> What’s the worst bit of advice you’ve ever received?


Running will raise your gravity center and make your balance weak. A wrestler should not run. 

If you can run faster than your opponent, even Mike Tyson's punch won't be able to land on you.


----------



## skribs (Jan 12, 2021)

Monkey Turned Wolf said:


> I can't imagine leaving a dentist that I've gone to for 20 years over what probably amounts to a $25 missed appointment fee. There are definitely reasons that I might switch, but that is nowhere near the list.



I believe it would have been $100.  But still, it was my fault.


----------



## Steve (Jan 12, 2021)

hoshin1600 said:


> Having actually followed that advise I disagree. My mother gave me that little nugget of advise and while is sounds good, the reality didn't match up.
> 1st many kids that go to a trade school actually never follow a career in their chosen trade. Second the subliminal message is "rather than reach for the stars ,and try to fulfill your potential, let's aim your life at a low target and hope you get a job"
> Tradesmen make good money and are great jobs and maybe in today's society going to a trade school is good advise when looking at the results the university is producing but sacrificing your future with low expectations is what I was really getting at


Your entire argument falls apart unless you fundamentally believe that people who work as carpenters, electricians, plumbers, welders, or in any other trade, are inferior to whatever it is that you do.  I can't even begin to tell you how vehemently I disagree with you on this.


----------



## Steve (Jan 12, 2021)

hoshin1600 said:


> good and bad is context dependent.  malevolent, now thats something all together different.


Evil or malevolent?  I don't know.  I do believe that half the country is stupid.


----------



## dvcochran (Jan 12, 2021)

Chrisinmd said:


> Most of the advice i got was from the "real men" generation so you can imagine.
> 
> "Stop being a *****"
> "Be happy, no one likes depressed people who mope around"
> ...


Yep, and there is the ignorance of youth spelled out plain and clear.


----------



## Steve (Jan 12, 2021)

Bad advice:

"Rub some dirt on it." - Eww.  Good way to get a staph infection. 
"Do what you love and you'll never work another day in your life."  Problem for me is that the moment I monetize something I love, it becomes a job, which makes it work.  The key for me is to find work that is challenging, interesting, and fulfilling, and use the money to fund the things I love on my own time.


----------



## hoshin1600 (Jan 12, 2021)

@Steve 
Thats ironic, all my life I worked as a carpenter, handyman doing every trade in the book, graduated trade high school as a welder, worked 10 years as a machinist and by sheer luck supervise the machine shop now.
I hate to start this argument all over again but I've lived it. Its my experience I've worked in the trades my whole life because at 14 years old I thought I wasn't smart enough to go to college. That was wrong and I should have at least tried...that's the point.


----------



## dvcochran (Jan 12, 2021)

Steve said:


> Bad advice:
> 
> "Rub some dirt on it." - Eww.  Good way to get a staph infection.
> "Do what you love and you'll never work another day in your life."  Problem for me is that the moment I monetize something I love, it becomes a job, which makes it work.  The key for me is to find work that is challenging, interesting, and fulfilling, and use the money to fund the things I love on my own time.


I do not see why 'job' cannot be synonymous  'challenging, interesting, & fulfilling. It should be anyway.


----------



## Kung Fu Wang (Jan 12, 2021)

- If you train like this, you will understand power generation after 5 years.

If someone cannot explain to you how to generate power within 10 minutes, you should find yourself another teacher.


----------



## Steve (Jan 12, 2021)

hoshin1600 said:


> @Steve
> Thats ironic, all my life I worked as a carpenter, handyman doing every trade in the book, graduated trade high school as a welder, worked 10 years as a machinist and by sheer luck supervise the machine shop now.
> I hate to start this argument all over again but I've lived it. Its my experience I've worked in the trades my whole life because at 14 years old I thought I wasn't smart enough to go to college. That was wrong and I should have at least tried...that's the point.


I really am sorry someone convinced you that you weren't smart enough to go to college and also that people who aren't smart end up in the trades.  Both of those are messed up.  I don't see where you addressed this.  Sorry if I'm missing it, but I don't see it needing to be an argument.  Suffice to say, I have a lot of respect for people who work in any skilled field and don't see it as any less any other.


----------



## Buka (Jan 14, 2021)

hoshin1600 said:


> @Steve
> Thats ironic, all my life I worked as a carpenter, handyman doing every trade in the book, graduated trade high school as a welder, worked 10 years as a machinist and by sheer luck supervise the machine shop now.
> I hate to start this argument all over again but I've lived it. Its my experience I've worked in the trades my whole life because at 14 years old I thought I wasn't smart enough to go to college. That was wrong and I should have at least tried...that's the point.



Watch out fellas, the Mods might lock the thread because they think talking about life is talking politics.


----------



## Buka (Jan 14, 2021)

I so wish I had good carpentry skills. I watch some finished carpenters I know make things and I watch them with wonder in my eyes. There's not just skill involved in good carpentry, there's an art to it.

A close friend of mine out here is a landscaper. When people ask what he does he says "I cut grass for a living." And that's the majority of the work he does.

He earns over 250 grand a year, every year. We call him the Marquise de Sod.


----------



## Steve (Jan 14, 2021)

Funny thing about this thread is that it's hard for me to actually remember any bad advice.  I can think of a lot of good advice that I'm glad I've heeded over the years.


----------



## donald1 (Jan 14, 2021)

Use rat poison as cough syrup. 

Back in 2012, my senior year in highschool, I was selling chocolate to fund my senior trip. Some older dude came up. Weirdo. Was talking about how he used rat poison to cure a cough.he also was talking about how he wanted to tell president obama his secret cure for the common cold.


----------



## Monkey Turned Wolf (Jan 14, 2021)

Steve said:


> Funny thing about this thread is that it's hard for me to actually remember any bad advice.  I can think of a lot of good advice that I'm glad I've heeded over the years.


And here I am thinking of good advice that I _didn't_ heed over the years.


----------



## Steve (Jan 14, 2021)

Monkey Turned Wolf said:


> And here I am thinking of good advice that I _didn't_ heed over the years.


Some of that too.


----------



## Chrisinmd (Jan 14, 2021)

Steve said:


> Funny thing about this thread is that it's hard for me to actually remember any bad advice.  I can think of a lot of good advice that I'm glad I've heeded over the years.



You must have had some wise and good hearted people in your life that cared about you and gave you good advice.  Not all of us were so lucky!


----------



## Steve (Jan 14, 2021)

Chrisinmd said:


> You must have had some wise and good hearted people in your life that cared about you and gave you good advice.  Not all of us were so lucky!


I wonder about that.  I mean, yeah, I feel like that's true.  But I also wonder if I just don't retain that kind of thing.   Believe me, I have had plenty of jackasses in my life, and I'm sure they've given me bad advice.  I just don't think I listened to them very closely.


----------



## dvcochran (Jan 14, 2021)

Buka said:


> I so wish I had good carpentry skills. I watch some finished carpenters I know make things and I watch them with wonder in my eyes. There's not just skill involved in good carpentry, there's an art to it.
> 
> A close friend of mine out here is a landscaper. When people ask what he does he says "I cut grass for a living." And that's the majority of the work he does.
> 
> He earns over 250 grand a year, every year. We call him the Marquise de Sod.


My grandfather and father were carpenters. It just went with the territory growing up. My oldest brother owns a large construction company. My other brother does carpentry regularly in his work. It came easy for them. I have a hard time drawing a straight line with a square in my hand. I can frame no problem but finish carpentry is a whole other level and like you said, an art. 
Just not in my blood.


----------



## Ivan (Jan 16, 2021)

dvcochran said:


> Whew! Have you ever bought completely into the "you must go to college to be someone" lie.


It’s the reality I am living. I am in college now and it honestly feels like a huge waste. The reality is, that it’s such a brainwashing environment it’s insane. 

Everyone thinks the same, and God forbid you go against the status quo. I am studying for a degree in computer science which I have no interest in. I have just started my second semester and I have already thought to myself multiple times that I should have enlisted in the army. Though I will admit that I am too scared of deployment to join.

The only reasons I am even moderately attached to staying are due to me not being able to find a job due to the pandemic, and my family refusing to provide any support unless I am studying in uni. I also want to go to an exchange in Japan at the Tokyo university for my third year.

I also plan to get a good job with my degree so that I can earn up to but a place to open a dojo. I am staying in university for literally everything but the education.

Worst advice I’ve ever gotten? Go to university.


----------



## jobo (Jan 16, 2021)

Ivan said:


> It’s the reality I am living. I am in college now and it honestly feels like a huge waste. The reality is, that it’s such a brainwashing environment it’s insane.
> 
> Everyone thinks the same, and God forbid you go against the status quo. I am studying for a degree in computer science which I have no interest in. I have just started my second semester and I have already thought to myself multiple times that I should have enlisted in the army. Though I will admit that I am too scared of deployment to join.
> 
> ...


il give you some more advice, qualifications are like having your own gold mine, provived you pick the right ones and computer science sounds good to me. people who only kbow how to change a hard drive/ ram/ processors make a good living out of the fact that most people are clueless.

stick it out, do all your studenty thibgs and turn up for lectures occasionally,  or turn on zoom if that what your doing 

twenty years from now youl ve glad you didnt throw it sway to get shouted at and occationaly shot at


----------



## dvcochran (Jan 16, 2021)

Ivan said:


> It’s the reality I am living. I am in college now and it honestly feels like a huge waste. The reality is, that it’s such a brainwashing environment it’s insane.
> 
> Everyone thinks the same, and God forbid you go against the status quo. I am studying for a degree in computer science which I have no interest in. I have just started my second semester and I have already thought to myself multiple times that I should have enlisted in the army. Though I will admit that I am too scared of deployment to join.
> 
> ...



First and foremost, these comments scare the hell out of me. "(I also plan to get a good job with my degree so that I can earn up to but a place to open a dojo. I am staying in university for literally everything but the education.

Worst advice I’ve ever gotten? Go to university.)"
I do not know you at all but you have always impressed me with your willingness to ask questions. I have no way of knowing what you do with the answers you receive. Asking alone means nothing. Absolutely nothing unless something results form the information. 

So, why can you not have some kind of job while you are in school? Simple question that deserves an answer. 

I want to tread lightly with you on this. First and most important; is your family (or some other vehicle) fully funding your schooling? If the answer is yes, then this is one of the greatest gifts a person can receive, and waste if they so choose. Youthful perspective can make this very hard to see sometimes. "Wasting" the gift by either wasting your time on a degree that has little to no future potential OR not putting your best effort into the opportunity of knowledge acquired is beyond a slap in the face to yourself and your family. Do not be thinking about your 'today' but be thinking about your days 5 years from now. Not 20 or 30, just 5. 
 Even people who make the grades but never take the time to really learn the material (and this happens a LOT) are wasting their time. A big, big part of college/university is the social element with the educators and teachers, not with other students (as much as most want you to believe this). Sadly, there is a systemic issue in the school system that allows people to slide through 4-5 years of their life with little positive to show for it. In my opinion, about 70+% of this problem is the students fault. Tools, options, and programs are available to make your time there much, much more valuable for your future. But it is on You to figure these things out. And it needs to be done quickly; not when you are 2/3's of the way through your degree program and realizing the enormous was of time it has been. 

If on the other hand you are paying/financing your way I would tell you there are some decisions to be made. 
First and foremost: What do you want to do? Not everyone can figure out their life's pathway at 17-19 years old and that is okay. But everyone should be able to set down, alone or with a very trusted advisor, and map out some of the absolutes of a good and satisfying life. 
Is your family structure such that you will continue in the "family business"? This completely changes the dynamic IMHO. This is where some long and deep conversations need to happen with you and your family. If you want this to become your future and going to university it is a 'requirement', make your education the best fit for the work.  Frankly, if this is your situation it is too family personal for a stranger to be giving you advise. 

Some folks on here think I am all about money. That is simply not true. But I very much understand the relationship of input/output. I also understood the time element of it. Simply stated, the sooner anything gets started the sooner it will come to fruition. In other words, the sooner you start developing a hard plan for your future the sooner it begins. Doesn't have to be perfect, and it Will change but starting is the number One thing. 
Now, here is where it gets tricky and a crystal ball would come in very handy. If you are driven by the wrong things it will hurt you one way or another. Even is these things seem rather innocuous (MA's for example). Timing has so much to do with this and embracing priority is the single most important thing for a young person to do. Whatever it is; girls, sports, games, etc... must not be given too much weight. While they are satisfying they are sometimes downright seductive. They can chew up all of your time, just adding to the stress and fog of what your real purpose is with university. 

I figured out pretty young that: A.) I am not a trust fund kid, B.) no big inheritance in my future and C.) I really was drawn to electrical engineering D.) I wanted to keep farming. 

So, A & B obviously told me work was required to have any kind of existence. Sparing you the boring details, I bounced around various job types until I settled into the kind of work field that I spent the rest of my life in. And this pushed me to go back and finish my schooling (2 EE Masters degrees in my late 30'), after my job had solidified into a very good career. To rewind to my early 20's; by 28 I was married, owned 3 businesses, and owned the strip mall my first TKD dojang is/was in. So even though my 'job' was bouncing around somewhat aimlessly, I was not. 
My sole point to saying this is to encourage you to Not think there is a singular line or path to your future or your happiness. Grab all of life's riches. But make damn sure you are willing to hang on for the ride and do the work. It Will not and Should not be easy. That is where you will find the most fun in all of it. And just know when and what to let go of. 

Now, to be more direct. Why the hell are you wasting your time studying for something you have no interest in? I will say there are good and bad answers to the question but please answer this question before we continue this part of the conversation.


----------



## dvcochran (Jan 16, 2021)

jobo said:


> il give you some more advice, qualifications are like having your own gold mine, provived you pick the right ones and computer science sounds good to me. people who only kbow how to change a hard drive/ ram/ processors make a good living out of the fact that most people are clueless.
> 
> stick it out, do all your studenty thibgs and turn up for lectures occasionally,  or turn on zoom if that what your doing
> 
> twenty years from now youl ve glad you didnt throw it sway to get shouted at and occationaly shot at



I do feel 'qualifications' can only come from applied knowledge. There is not much worse than having someone who has not truly 'been there' trying to tell you 'how' to do something. Pretty much like the guy you get on the phone when you call customer support and know they are reading off a script. 

So Ivan, or anyone else can and should get quality education; whether it comes by virtue of formal schooling or training on the job, time and effort are the allies. Just make certain there are no regrets or should haves. 
If formal schooling can be had with little to no cost it is a no brainer. What you do with the time invested in on you.


----------



## Razznik (Feb 18, 2021)

Bullies are only mean because they need a hug XD


----------

