# Naked Karate Fight?



## Bill Mattocks

http://www.eveningsun.com/ci_11873097



> He is accused of walking out of his home, completely naked. He walked up to Dennis Hucks, Gary Kerns and Andrea Orndorff, according to state police. He told the men he knew karate, and asked if they wanted to fight.
> ...
> According to police, Jones said he knew leaving the house naked was illegal, but he was a *"serious martial artist."*


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## tellner




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## MA-Caver

I guess my answer to a bare naked man asking me if I wanted to fight would be ...


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## Thesemindz

I've found that when I do karate naked my balance is all off. I think it's because I am used to be clothed and I unconsciously compensate for my clothes shifting while I move. When I'm naked, they aren't there, and they aren't shifting, but I'm still compensating, and I think that's why my balance is off.

Maybe we should spend more time doing karate naked in the studio to overcome this obstacle to true mastery. I mean, we are _serious_ martial artists, aren't we?


-Rob


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## Sukerkin

I choose to do my 'naked karate' (TM) sparring with Elle McPherson :lol:.


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## Bill Mattocks

You know, I've been thinking about it, and I think _nude fu_ might have real application as a self-defense technique.  Imagine this - you're approached by a mugger who demands your wallet.  You respond by tearing off your clothes (part of the training would be to get out of them quickly) and offer to fight him naked.

My _nude fu_ is powerful - everyone but my wife will be puking and heading for the door.


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## Thesemindz

Bill Mattocks said:


> You know, I've been thinking about it, and I think _nude fu_ might have real application as a self-defense technique. Imagine this - you're approached by a mugger who demands your wallet. You respond by tearing off your clothes (part of the training would be to get out of them quickly) and offer to fight him naked.
> 
> My _nude fu_ is powerful - everyone but my wife will be puking and heading for the door.


 
You might kick my ***.

But you're gonna have to kick my *** with my junk hanging out.

I like to wrestle too.

Wait till I get you on the ground.


-Rob


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## Bill Mattocks

Thesemindz said:


> You might kick my ***.
> 
> But you're gonna have to kick my *** with my junk hanging out.
> 
> I like to wrestle too.
> 
> Wait till I get you on the ground.



:erg:

Well, that the hell.  I haven't even seen my junk in years.  I assume it's all still there.


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## Thesemindz

Bill Mattocks said:


> :erg:
> 
> Well, that the hell. I haven't even seen my junk in years. I assume it's all still there.


 
Why don't you just ask someone else to check for you? You know, a friend or coworker.


-Rob


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## Bill Mattocks

Thesemindz said:


> Why don't you just ask someone else to check for you? You know, a friend or coworker.



Well, then we're back to that screaming and puking thing again.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IYx_tRnpVg&feature=related


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## Jade Tigress

The more posts in this thread that I read, the harder I laughed.


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## Brian R. VanCise

You are definitely right on that Jade!


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## Hagakure

Jade Tigress said:


> The more posts in this thread that I read, the harder I laughed.



Ditto! 

Thesemindz... Junk?


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## Sukerkin

Our American friends use "Junk" to refer to what we English speakers would call "Tackle", "Bits", "Meat and two veg" et al.


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## tellner

*Attention:* Participants in Co-Ed Nude Brazilian Ju Jitsu _must_ leave the guard or mount and return to their feet within an half an hour.


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## Thesemindz

tellner said:


> *Attention:* Participants in Co-Ed Nude Brazilian Ju Jitsu _must_ leave the guard or mount and return to their feet within an half an hour.


 
Wait.

I have to stay there the *whole* half hour?


-Rob


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## Gordon Nore

My advice to this fellow is never fight naked with a Hapkidoist. If it's our there, we'll twist it.


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## Andrew Green

Gordon Nore said:


> My advice to this fellow is never fight naked with a Hapkidoist. If it's our there, we'll twist it.



Saying things like that too the wrong person, or in the wrong bar, will lead you to having a very interesting evening...

What makes things worse is I saw the St. Pierre Vaseline story right before this one.  Somehow I went from too much lubricant to someone wanting to give it a good twist.  I think it's time I close the browser for tonight...


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## Hagakure

Sukerkin said:


> Our American friends use "Junk" to refer to what we English speakers would call "Tackle", "Bits", "Meat and two veg" et al.


 
Fully understood old boy, just made me chuckle.  

"Gentlemens area", or "wedding vegetable".


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## Gordon Nore

Andrew Green said:


> Saying things like that too the wrong person, or in the wrong bar, will lead you to having a very interesting evening...


 
:lfao:

Hadn't thought of that. All's I'm saying is, if attacked by a naked stranger, I'm ready.


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## shihansmurf

Hagakure said:


> Fully understood old boy, just made me chuckle.
> 
> "Gentlemens area", or "wedding vegetable".



Ya know, I think the term "wedding vegetable" has just found a new and permanent home in my vocabulary. You Brits have quite a way with the English language :wink1:

Mark


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## tellner

So not unlike "franks and beans" or "twig and berries"?


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## Sukerkin

Aye, that's the idea.  It seems there are as many euphemisms for wedding tackle as there are for threepenny bits :lol:.


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## Flea

"twinkie and the twins"


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