# Self-Denfense Private Lessons - What to do?



## psyon82 (Oct 20, 2011)

I recently made 1st degree black belt in Kajukenbo, so now I'm eligible to privately train clients. I have a client who is only interested in the self-defense aspect and not so much in katas, belt progressions, etc. He took private lessons with another Kajukenbo instructor in the past, but he feels like he lost his sense of confidence in being able to handle a self-defense situation.   Unfortunately, his previous lessons focused on techniques and there was  minimal development of the fundamentals. So I went into this thinking  we'd start at the basic level. I've instructed the kids and adults class solo on several occasions, and I take private lessons with my instructors (technique-based instruction). But as this is my first client, I am at a loss as to how to design a private lesson "curriculum".  

Currently we meet once a week for an hour and a half, and it will soon be twice weekly. I would like some advice on how to maximize our time together without progressing beyond his capabilities. I'm noticing that I get so excited to show him different techniques that I forget he doesn't even know the basic principles let alone the proper weapon formation. But I don't want to bore him to death by going too slowly. I recently picked up the 5 Infinite Insights volumes at the campus library for additional help (I'm also a blue belt in Chinese Kenpo). Thank you for your advice, and I hope all is well. 

Ben


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## KenpoDave (Oct 20, 2011)

It is great that, as a black belt, you are trusted to teach, but your instructor (or the school owner) needs to give you some training in how he wants you to teach as a representative of his school.If that will not happen, I would suggest taking the techniques required for each belt and breaking them down into their single basic components, and then teaching those fundamentals separately.  If a technique uses an inward block, front kick, and reverse punch, teach and work those basics so that they are usefu and understood on their own merits.I would shorten the private to no more than 45 minutes, unless your school does not offer group workout sessions.  In that case, I would spend roughly 30 minutes on instruction, and an hour on work.


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## jks9199 (Oct 20, 2011)

psyon82 said:


> Currently we meet once a week for an hour and a half, and it will soon be twice weekly. I would like some advice on how to maximize our time together without progressing beyond his capabilities. I'm noticing that I get so excited to show him different techniques that I forget he doesn't even know the basic principles let alone the proper weapon formation. But I don't want to bore him to death by going too slowly. I recently picked up the 5 Infinite Insights volumes at the campus library for additional help (I'm also a blue belt in Chinese Kenpo). Thank you for your advice, and I hope all is well.
> 
> Ben



First, you're running into a common challenge for instructors of any level.  Balancing teaching everything or teaching to your own level with teaching to the student's level.  I went through a stretch where I lost new students because it took months to learn a single punch...  (and I'm only slightly exaggerating the time!)  Look at the technique, and come up with a "road map."  I'm just going to use a simple twist punch as an example.  The first level might simply be the proper fist, chamber, and delivery path of the arm.  Later, as in after another session or two or more, you can refine and add the exact moment to turn, how to use your hips or whatever further elements. 

Second, you need to figure out exactly what he's after, and then how you can provide it.  You might find out you're the wrong person -- or that you have to do some research to learn what to teach him.


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## MJS (Oct 20, 2011)

psyon82 said:


> I recently made 1st degree black belt in Kajukenbo, so now I'm eligible to privately train clients. I have a client who is only interested in the self-defense aspect and not so much in katas, belt progressions, etc. He took private lessons with another Kajukenbo instructor in the past, but he feels like he lost his sense of confidence in being able to handle a self-defense situation.   Unfortunately, his previous lessons focused on techniques and there was  minimal development of the fundamentals. So I went into this thinking  we'd start at the basic level. I've instructed the kids and adults class solo on several occasions, and I take private lessons with my instructors (technique-based instruction). But as this is my first client, I am at a loss as to how to design a private lesson "curriculum".
> 
> Currently we meet once a week for an hour and a half, and it will soon be twice weekly. I would like some advice on how to maximize our time together without progressing beyond his capabilities. I'm noticing that I get so excited to show him different techniques that I forget he doesn't even know the basic principles let alone the proper weapon formation. But I don't want to bore him to death by going too slowly. I recently picked up the 5 Infinite Insights volumes at the campus library for additional help (I'm also a blue belt in Chinese Kenpo). Thank you for your advice, and I hope all is well.
> 
> Ben



Well, first, congrats on your black belt!   A few questions:

1) What rank is your student?

2) How long has he been training?

The nice thing about private lessons, is that you usually get to focus on specific things, not necessarily having to be bound by a set curriculum.  So, that said, it seems to me, and correct me if I'm wrong, that he's not interested in kata or the typical 'formal' training, but instead wants to focus just on SD.  

This can be done, but IMHO, you need to make sure you start him off with a solid foundation.  That being said, its important that he has solid stances, punches, kicks, blocks.  Without that, no matter what you teach him, it'll probably suck when he does it, because of the lack of solid base.

So, in addition to working techs, I'd also work on some spontaneous reaction drills, ie: once he has a tech. down, build off of that, using the principles, ideas, etc., from that tech.  In other words, dont let him just rely on the preset techs, that you're teaching him.  Make sure that he can 'think on the fly' so to speak.  I'd have a weekly lesson plan set up in advance.  Spend some time reviewing what you did the week prior.  If anything needs work, work on it.  Then work on some new stuff.


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## psyon82 (Oct 20, 2011)

Thank you for your advice Dave. I've run the idea of attending group classes with fewer privates by him, but his schedule won't permit him to attend our classes. Also, he prefers to have the longer time slot - why? I honestly forgot and will ask him next class. As of now, I start us off with close to a 20 min functional warm-up to work on his balance, flexibility, and stabilization. He had a knee surgery several months ago, and using my knowledge as a personal trainer, I realize we won't get anywhere (or possibly regress) if I don't incorporate that into our training. He doesn't seem to mind because I've explained the benefits of each stretch/exercise. Then we just do basics. However, while we do them I usually show him a technique in which they are used so he can see the importance of the basic mechanics. I went a tad to fast the first day trying to teach him inward block-handsword to the neck, and I could sense his frustration when he couldn't get it. I don't want to discourage or overwhelm him, but I feel bad when I have to say, "hmmm, that's a little too advanced for you, my bad." 

As far as my instructors teaching me how to teach him or the classes - that doesn't happen. If I ask what should I do with the class or in my privates, I'm told, "do whatever you want to do" (quoted from recent a text message). Some days I get discouraged to go to class because I don't want to be left to my own devices. I don't have written lessons plans or anything of that nature, so when I walk in the door and find out I have to teach the class on the fly, I get nervous. The kids' parents are sitting there with the eagle eye on me, and I don't want to look like I don't know what's going on. I've been student-teaching since brown belt, but I still get nervous when I teach the class by myself. I don't want to have a boring class. It's easy to be an armchair-coach from within the ranks, but when you're up front it's a whole new ballgame. I'm sure I'm speaking to the choir, but this is a new revelation for me. Fortunately, I'm also taking Kenpo, so I have a different methods of teaching to fall back on.


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## psyon82 (Oct 20, 2011)

jks9199 said:


> First, you're running into a common challenge for instructors of any level.  Balancing teaching everything or teaching to your own level with teaching to the student's level.  I went through a stretch where I lost new students because it took months to learn a single punch...  (and I'm only slightly exaggerating the time!)  Look at the technique, and come up with a "road map."  I'm just going to use a simply twist punch as an example.  The first level might simply be the proper fist, chamber, and delivery path of the arm.  Later, as in after another session or two or more, you can refine and add the exact moment to turn, how to use your hips or whatever further elements.
> 
> Second, you need to figure out exactly what he's after, and then how you can provide it.  You might find out you're the wrong person -- or that you have to do some research to learn what to teach him.



Thank you jks, 

I plan to break down techniques as you suggested. He wants to know that he is able to defend himself. He said he doesn't feel "ready" if something were to happen. It's a process of learning for me, and I learn more each session. We'll see how today goes, haha.


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## Flying Crane (Oct 20, 2011)

You've mentioned that you spend a lot of the time with him working on basics, and that is tremendously important.  I think a big mistake that a lot of folks make in the various kenpo systems is jumping too quickly into the self defense techs, without taking the time to really develop the basics first.  The SD techs are more "intersting" and people are eager to get to them.  But they fail to consider that if the basics are not strong and solid, then those SD techs are far less functional and can even be worthless.  So whatever you do, keep working the basics, and strive to help your student understand how vitally important those basics are, so that he embraces the process.

Personally, as I progress, I find the basics more and more interesting, and the more complex material takes second place in both importance and interest for me.  I'm no longer a kenpo guy, I train kung fu and I have one student.  By default he gets a private lesson because he's the only one.  I teach him and we train together and spend about 40 minutes drilling the basics before we move on to more complex issues like forms and interactive application.  overall we probably spend about two hours in a session.

we have a specific way that we step and walk, where we focus on rooting our stance and deriving power from that stance.  Typically we open our training session with a few minutes of working on this walking and stepping method.  I was unable to be in class one day and he told me that on that day, he spent 30 minutes just practicing the walking.  And he loved it, just digging into the most basic and fundamental elements of our system, that are the most important.

Honestly, I was proud as a teacher.  I feel I managed to get the message thru to him.


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## psyon82 (Oct 20, 2011)

MJS said:


> Well, first, congrats on your black belt!   A few questions:
> 
> 1) What rank is your student?
> 
> ...



Thank you for the congratulations  To answer your questions:

1) The highest he has is yellow belt in Japanese Ju Jitsu

2) Judo at 13 for 8 months, Japanese JJ until yellow belt in 1996, and private lessons in Kajukenbo in 2008 for several months.

Yes, he interested in self-defense. More specifically conditioning, contact, and repetition to ensure "readiness". The problem I was facing the first two sessions is I don't want the class to seem to "formal" by running through the basics, but after engaging in this topic, I realize that my intentions are accurate. I now realize that I need to step my game up to another level, and quit being lazy in my training. It's not that I'm lazy, but I'm in massage school and taking a full time senior-level college load, so training barely has room to fit in among all of the reading. Pretty much, I was asking if anyone had a basic rubric to follow when teaching a private lesson. But I've gotten some great ideas already, so I'm not as worried anymore :bangahead:


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## psyon82 (Oct 20, 2011)

Flying Crane said:


> You've mentioned that you spend a lot of the time with him working on basics, and that is tremendously important.  I think a big mistake that a lot of folks make in the various kenpo systems is jumping too quickly into the self defense techs, without taking the time to really develop the basics first.  The SD techs are more "intersting" and people are eager to get to them.  But they fail to consider that if the basics are not strong and solid, then those SD techs are far less functional and can even be worthless.  So whatever you do, keep working the basics, and strive to help your student understand how vitally important those basics are, so that he embraces the process.
> 
> Personally, as I progress, I find the basics more and more interesting, and the more complex material takes second place in both importance and interest for me.  I'm no longer a kenpo guy, I train kung fu and I have one student.  By default he gets a private lesson because he's the only one.  I teach him and we train together and spend about 40 minutes drilling the basics before we move on to more complex issues like forms and interactive application.  overall we probably spend about two hours in a session.
> 
> ...



Thank you sir, that is exactly what I needed to read. Sigh, the power of the social network never ceases to amazing me.


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## shesulsa (Oct 20, 2011)

I have an ongoing self-defense class for adults. We meet weekly and cover a lot of basics.

Core curriculum right now:

1. Movement - as in, your feet under your shoulders, weight distribution, posture, hand placement, bob 'n' weave, etcetera.

2. Proper and effective striking - dainty hands have little business punching, so elbows, knees, vital targets.

3. READING THE OPPONENT!

4. Responding to opponent's movement

5. Basic, all-around approach to self-defense; clear your body from the line of attack, take control. Taking control could mean running, using one's voice, de-escalating the threat or necessary force.

6. ESCAPES FROM GRABS and counters.

7. GROUND FIGHTING ESCAPES and counters.

8. Safer falling techniques.

9. Easy but effective techniques.

and finally but not last nor least - PRACTICE!  Skills need to be practiced and the venue to do that is in your training area.


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## MJS (Oct 20, 2011)

psyon82 said:


> Thank you for the congratulations  To answer your questions:
> 
> 1) The highest he has is yellow belt in Japanese Ju Jitsu
> 
> ...



Glad to help.   Given his training background, (and again, I'm just offering suggestions, you're free to do as you wish) but I'd definately start with the basics.  Make sure he's doing things correctly.  No, you dont need to spend hour after hour doing punches and kicks, but it sounds like he could use a base.  You could probably take the average Kaju class plan and gear it towards a private lesson.


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## jks9199 (Oct 20, 2011)

psyon82 said:


> As far as my instructors teaching me how to teach him or the classes - that doesn't happen. If I ask what should I do with the class or in my privates, I'm told, "do whatever you want to do" (quoted from recent a text message). Some days I get discouraged to go to class because I don't want to be left to my own devices. I don't have written lessons plans or anything of that nature, so when I walk in the door and find out I have to teach the class on the fly, I get nervous. The kids' parents are sitting there with the eagle eye on me, and I don't want to look like I don't know what's going on. I've been student-teaching since brown belt, but I still get nervous when I teach the class by myself. I don't want to have a boring class. It's easy to be an armchair-coach from within the ranks, but when you're up front it's a whole new ballgame. I'm sure I'm speaking to the choir, but this is a new revelation for me. Fortunately, I'm also taking Kenpo, so I have a different methods of teaching to fall back on.


You've got a management problem, there.  Especially as a new black belt -- you shouldn't be unexpectedly thrown into teach a class.  But since it's happening -- make a few standby lesson planes for yourself, and keep them in your bag.  That way, you've got something to fall back on.  Talk to your instructors, don't just text them.  Go in with a few ideas, and bounce them off of your teachers.  (Not to plug somebody, but you might look at Rory Miller's Drills e-book, as well as his other books.)  That way, you're not going in saying "do it for me" but "help me make this better."


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## jks9199 (Oct 20, 2011)

psyon82 said:


> Thank you jks,
> 
> I plan to break down techniques as you suggested. He wants to know that he is able to defend himself. He said he doesn't feel "ready" if something were to happen. It's a process of learning for me, and I learn more each session. We'll see how today goes, haha.



OK...  serious moment here.  Are you trying to teach him self defense, or how to apply kajukenbo dynamically.  They are not the same.  For self defense, you need to learn how to teach self defense.  It's different.  I'm not going to go on & on here; you can find plenty of threads and discussions about it around the site.  Might even give you some ideals...


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## Buka (Oct 20, 2011)

You might want to teach him how to avoid the wrong situations, which is as important in self defense training as anything else. Maybe teach some situational awareness, some dynamics of social violence as oppossed to predator violence.
You might want to teach any of the physical components based on what he does the best, as opposed to the weaker parts of his game.


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## Thesemindz (Oct 20, 2011)

jks9199 said:


> OK...  serious moment here.  Are you trying to teach him self defense, or how to apply kajukenbo dynamically.  They are not the same.  For self defense, you need to learn how to teach self defense.  It's different.  I'm not going to go on & on here; you can find plenty of threads and discussions about it around the site.  Might even give you some ideals...



This was my first thought as well. You say you are teaching him "self defense," but it sounds like what he wants is to develop basic fighting ability without relying on a training model that is heavily weighted towards pre-arranged patterns. That's fine, and can be done using the material of almost any martial arts style, but it is vastly different from teaching "self defense." Self defense involves discussions about engagement psychology, legalities of personal protection, environmental awareness, and many other concepts and skills. Many of us incorporate those lessons in to our martial arts classes anyway, but if you are not teaching those things you are not teaching "self defense." That isn't really a problem, you can teach whatever you want, but the first step to determining how and what you want to teach is to clearly understand your goals as an instructor and the goals of your students.

When I'm teaching "self defense" I have a basic and intermediate curriculum that I teach which covers many of these aspects. You can find my beginner curriculum, as well as examples of how I incorporate the beginner and intermediate curricula into class plans here on MartialTalk.

Beginner Street Self Defense
Beginner Street Self Defense Class Plans
Intermediate Street Self Defense Class Plans

Those classes also include some kenpo technique training which you could replace with your own material or exclude completely. Understand though, that those classes were for students who had been training in our school for at least a year and were part of a larger martial arts curriculum. I don't really begin to focus on street fighting, or ground fighting, or sparring, until the students have almost a year of regular training in basics and beginner kenpo material.

Rather than go into why I teach what I do, I'll tell you how I go about writing a curriculum for my students. First, I get out a blank sheet of paper and make a list of all the material I want to cover with my students, from the most basic to the most advanced. Then I arrange that material in a progressive fashion so that more advanced skills are evolutions of simpler material. Then I split that material in to classes built around central themes and tied together in such a way as to reinforce both previous material and new material.

You mention that you aren't using class plans. I would suggest you begin. Right now. Start simple. Take a piece of paper and split it into four sections. Label those sections *WARM UP, STATIC DRILLS, NEW MATERIAL, DYNAMIC DRILLS.* In the WARM UP section, write down whatever exercises and basics you like to use to get the students ready for training. Start with a stretch, then get them moving around, then have them work some simple strikes in the air and on the pads. Include calisthenics or not depending on how you like to train. In the STATIC DRILLS section, write down some simple drills that the students can do against a non-resisting opponent. Maybe basic blocking drills, or footwork drills, or head movement drills, or striking drills. Take material you worked on in previous classes and have the students drill it during this time to review and develop skills. In the NEW MATERIAL section write down whatever new basics, concepts, techniques, or discussions you are going to work on with the student in that class. This is lab time, you might slow the class down, or work on form, the key is that you are engaging their minds and giving them something new to work on. In the final section, the DYNAMIC DRILLS section, make a list of competitive drills and activities that the students can practice against a resisting opponent. These can be simple drills like working the clinch position against a resisting opponent, or they can be free sparring, or evasion drills. Incorporate the new material in to the static drills from the beginning of class and use this time to get the students working on something that requires them to really apply the lessons you've been teaching them.

That's a basic, simple class plan. You don't have to follow it exactly. But it's a place to start. Personally, I believe that it is extremely important to have a plan going in to a class. You don't have to follow it perfectly, and the more experienced you become the more free you will feel to go off script. But, especially as a beginner instructor, it is so important for you to plan ahead and not just "wing it." What I've written here is just an example, you may decide to do things differently. But do something. You will teach better classes and your students will benefit from you putting in the work ahead of time.

The student you are working on is a complete beginner. A yellow belt in one art? A few months training in another? And nothing in years? He's a beginner. He might not want to believe it, he might not want to hear it, but it is what it is. Start at the start. That doesn't mean you should bore him or belittle him, but he won't benefit from you skipping ahead in an attempt to get him excited about his training. Just work on making the basics exciting. Like Michael said, the basics really are exciting if they are presented in the right way. Take a simple basic, like a jab/cross combination, or a bearhug, or a straight arm bar, and work with the student. Make them apply it in a static environment, make them apply while you push them around, make them apply it while they are defending, or attacking, or circling, or retreating, make them defend against it. You can make a really exciting class out of a simple inward handsword. But if you never take the time to teach them a _proper_ inward handsword then all their future training will be built on a poor foundation.

I've taught kenpo as a strict series of pre-arranged patterns and I've taught it with no patterns at all. It can be done. Look at your techniques and sets and forms. What are they trying to teach? Take those lessons, isolate them, and teach the lessons without the pre-arranged sequences. For instance, if Delayed Sword is teaching inside defense/lead side counters/hard style blocking, then can you teach the student those lessons without ever teaching him Delayed Sword? Of course you can. You can use spontaneous drills and activities to get him to work on all those concepts without ever having him memorize a technique.

Personally, with new students I have a list of beginner techniques for standing and ground fighting, for grappling and striking, for attacking and defending, for hands and feet, for stances and moving. Regardless of the technique material I intend to teach them, I work on these basic techniques as well in order to develop the beginner skill set. For instance, my beginners learn Clinch, Bearhug, and Arm Hold as the beginner "control positions." We practice and explore each of those techniques in a number of situations so that they can understand and apply them spontaneously. The beginner locks are Hammerlock, Straight Arm Bar, and Headlock. The beginner kicks are front, side, and rear. Etc, etc.

One last thing. You've just started teaching. You will make mistakes. I've lost students because I went too fast, I've lost students because I went to slow. I've lost students because they've gotten hurt, I've lost students because we didn't train hard enough. You are a white belt instructor, and instructing is a completely different skill set from karate. You have a lot of learning ahead of you, and you're doing the right thing by asking questions. Be patient with yourself. Be patient with your students. One of the most important lessons of karate is that we are never done learning. No one here has it all figured out, neither do your instructors or senior black belts. Just keep working and you'll keep getting better. Learn from every old class. Try to do better with every new class. After you finish teaching one, take notes on your lesson plan about what worked and what didn't and what you had to change on the fly and what conversations or drills came up that you hadn't planned. Then study those notes and lesson plans when you go to write your next one. This is part of learning too.

Good luck. This is a good place and you will find a lot of good people here. You will also run into some jerks. Don't let the negativity get you down. Stay focused on getting better and you will. But it will take time. You didn't get your black belt in a day, you won't become a black belt instructor in a day either.


-Rob


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## Twin Fist (Oct 20, 2011)

tech the techniques, grab art 1, trick 1, etc

when he says "i dont know that block" 

you say

"thats why you learn basics"


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## Chris Parker (Oct 20, 2011)

I'm with JKS and Thesemindz here, self defence is a very different animal... the problem is, of course, that most people don't get that, even when they're asking for it. Most people equate physical fighting methods with self defence, which isn't correct, and martial arts with fighting, and therefore by extension self defence, which again is not correct. Again, there are a huge number of threads around here that go into that, have a quick search and you'll find them.

But to give a brief idea of what we mean (or at least, what I mean), the physical fighting aspects are really the last resort aspects of self defence. They are what you rely on when actual self defence has failed, really. The hierarchy of self defence is as follows: 
- Awareness (intuitive, observational, common sense etc), avoiding dangerous situations, leaving when something looks to be turning "bad" etc
- Distance and de-escalation (physical and verbal, aggressive and passive), preventing a situation from going bad, or providing the option of escape if you haven't already left
- Pre-emptive striking to enable escape before you are attacked
- Actual defensive actions applied against an attacking opponent

This also needs to be teamed with an understanding of the effects of adrenaline, relevant psychology, knowledge of the legal system you are operating in, body language (yours and other peoples), pre-fight triggers and indicators, and more.

Honestly, if you're most interested in actual self defence, the majority of the work will be on de-escalation, dominant body language (without looking like you're "challenging" an attacker), observation, how to apply adrenaline to affect a "flight" responce in the opponent rather than "fight", and some pre-emptive drills. That is then supplemented with some defensive work, which should be teamed as much as possible with adrenaline drills and drills that simulate the effects of a sudden assault (such as spinning, starting with your eyes closed and being shoved etc). But you may note that the physical "fighting" aspect is the least important, and the least relied on.

All that said, I feel that the guy you have there doesn't get any of that at all, and if you present things that way to him, he'll leave. It just doesn't match the image he has in his head, which is purely "fighting techniques", while wanting the short cut of not doing anything he isn't personally interested in. With his minimalist background, I'd personally tell him to join a school and not waste my time with him. He's shown no real commitment to anything (not sure what a "yellow belt" in Japanese Jujutsu might be... but I'm assuming that it was a modern Western system, frankly, and it's a low level rank), which shows that he just wants a "quick fix", which can be done, but is typically not advisable, as those who request it do so because they aren't prepared to put in the effort to seriously work it or keep the skills drilled and fresh (exceptions are organisations such as Law Enforcement and Military who only have so many hours a year to train).

So really, you can pretty much give him anything you want, just avoid the formal kata approach to keep him happy. He doesn't get what self defence really is, so if all you do is some bag or pad work and some sparring, he'll be happy. It's not actually self defence in any way, but it's more what he's after. Don't stress about the value of it too much, honestly, all you're doing is filling an unconscious image (fantasy) that he has in his head anyway, and no matter how good your material is, how relevant it is to what he says he's after, it'll have the same result... in fact, the bag and pad work with some sparring could have a more positive result, as that's what he's expecting and wanting, so it could keep him around a bit longer.


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