# Live Sword Cuts on Human Body



## Brian R. VanCise (Dec 15, 2007)

Rarely do I post negative video footage but this struck
me as wrong on so many levels.

[yt]YHO2rCk1y-c[/yt]


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## Kreth (Dec 15, 2007)

World Record Holder. I assume Guinness has him listed as World's Biggest Moron...


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## theletch1 (Dec 15, 2007)

Theatrics like that inspire so many ignorant (in the true sense of the word) people to try the same thing and wind up killing someone.


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## jks9199 (Dec 15, 2007)

What's he world record holder in?  Stupid People Tricks?  Bad Band Back Up?  

I hate when I see people do any variant on the vegetable chopping on your buddy stunts...  If you know anything about it, it's not impressive, because VEGGIES CHOP, while flesh has to be cut.  (Don't take my word for it; try to chop some meat next time you cook dinner.  It ain't easy...  Then try it with a veggie on top.  It's easy to cut the veggie without hurting the meat...  OK, somehow that sounded a little bluer than I intended!)

And then some idiot still screws it up... didn't someone recently post a clip where the "master" managed to cut his assistant's neck?  Reminded me of the TV series *Dinosaurs* where they did a spoof of Mr. Wizard and similar shows.  Lab assistant Timmy was always the one holding the explosive or standing behind the rocket engine... "We're gonna need another Timmy!"


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## theletch1 (Dec 15, 2007)

Dinosaurs!  I loved that series.  "Not the momma!"

I think that folks who know better and still do the sword demos like that should be ashamed of themselves.  The most humiliating thing I've ever done in my MA experience was as a young green belt in kempo.  My instructor was impressed with the way I was able to manipulate a katana and chinese broadsword while goofing around in the studio.  Looked great, very movie-ish.  He had me do solo performances during a demo with both weapons.  Afterward folks came up to me and complemented me on the performance.  I kept thinking to myself "Man, if you only knew."  I knew that what I was doing was nothing like the real thing...I just didn't know how far away from the real thing and how potentially dangerous until I learned alot more about weapons.


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## FearlessFreep (Dec 15, 2007)

(in tandem) "Say It!!!"

_ "We're gonna need another Timmy!"_


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## Dave Leverich (Dec 15, 2007)

Apparently not much cardio work in that dojo?
Stupid stunt as well.


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## Skip Cooper (Dec 15, 2007)

gotta love the band playing in the background!

did the samurai also tape their wrists before doing battle with cucumbers?


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## arnisador (Dec 15, 2007)

Those aren't even martial arts techniques--they're cooking cuts. It's like he studied under Soke Wolfgang Puck.


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## tellner (Dec 15, 2007)

Socially acceptable words fail me. The guy is a grandstanding, incompetent, ignorant, bloated <BAD WORD> <EXTREMELY BAD WORD> <GOOD LORD I DIDN'T THINK I KNEW A WORD THAT BAD>. 

At least he wasn't likely to hurt the poor dupe who was lying on the chairs. Skin is pretty resilient to chops as opposed to drawing cuts. But I still can't imagine what inspired the student to lie there while "Grandmaster" Blivet whacked away at him. Especially the bit with the strategically placed final cucumber.

His dog-lame cutting technique didn't look like any sword work anyone ever used for fighting. You wouldn't even hire him to chop salad for Sizzler. 

And this 24 karat brass plated board certified flaming twit represents us?

:barf:


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## FearlessFreep (Dec 15, 2007)

arnisador said:


> Those aren't even martial arts techniques--they're cooking cuts. It's like he studied under Soke Wolfgang Puck.



I could do that with a steak knife (if I could get my cat to hold still....)


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## MA-Caver (Dec 15, 2007)

What was sad was the guy trying to be such a bad *** and failing miserably. C'mon you want to impress me use a full sized katana ... or is that gonna be too unwieldy for the likes of you big boy? 
Eventually as mentioned above, someone is going to try that and seriously hurt or kill someone. Eventually big boy sensei is gonna make a mistake and cut one his students in front of an audience and will have to spin something to cover up his boo-boo. 
Yeah the band in the background was almost as bad as the demonstration. 

Sigh. Ah well... now back to the *real* world of *real* martial arts shall we?


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## exile (Dec 15, 2007)

What I thought was particularly pathetic was the very obvious effort of the guy with the... sword, I guess you'd have to call it... to look ominous, dangerous, lethal, brutally efficient... all of the adjectives in the latest Matt Furey full-page ad in _Black Belt_ flogging some product or secret routine or whatever. The stoney expression! The flinty look in his eyes as he decapitated that cucumber like Tony Soprano whacking a suspected informer! The hand held up in warning that something really amazing was about to happen! 

It doesn't work all that well when you waddle along like that, alas, but still, _very_ high marks in the theatrics department! :lol:


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## newGuy12 (Dec 15, 2007)

Oh my.


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## Senjojutsu (Dec 16, 2007)

Not being a member of The Tribe, but perhaps this is not a Martial Arts demo but a modernized Bris ceremony (Jewish Ritual Circumcision) and the good "professor" is performing the role of the Mohel.
:uhoh:

I do not know what is more stupid, this demo or the old watermelon cut on a bare stomach while being blindfolded.


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## Cirdan (Dec 16, 2007)

Another "master" so full of BS he is going to wash away in the rain....


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## Cruentus (Dec 16, 2007)

Wow. I didn't know the dunkin donuts guy moonlights as a sword master. Who knew?

"Time to make the do-nuts"


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## shesulsa (Dec 16, 2007)

*sigh*

I don't care if he's hefty, he's carrying a sharp long metal blade.  And he's using it to chop veggies with on someone's body.

I don't want to be disrespectful, but ... I don't know how comfortable I feel with this.  I've seen videos of and read about experienced people getting seriously cut.  Even the pros make mistakes.

Lordy, lordy, lordy.

This was a psych trip too - what the crap was he doing, putting a cuke in the guy's mouth, then removing it to place on his groin???  Did anyone else catch that but me?  What's up with that?

:idunno:


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## tellner (Dec 16, 2007)

Senjojutsu said:


> Not being a member of The Tribe, but perhaps this is not a Martial Arts demo but a modernized Bris ceremony (Jewish Ritual Circumcision) and the good "professor" is performing the role of the Mohel.



I wouldn't let _him_ into the Mohel Majority


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## exile (Dec 16, 2007)

shesulsa said:


> This was a psych trip too - what the crap was he doing, putting a cuke in the guy's mouth, then removing it to place on his groin???  Did anyone else catch that but me?  What's up with that?
> 
> :idunno:



I noticed it, but assumed that it was a standard part of the live-cucumber-cuts-on-student's-body thing... I mean, what do _I_ know about such things??


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## exile (Dec 16, 2007)

shesulsa said:


> This was a psych trip too - what the crap was he doing, putting a cuke in the guy's mouth, then removing it to place on his groin???  Did anyone else catch that but me?  What's up with that?
> 
> :idunno:



I noticed it, but assumed that it was just a standard part of the live-cucumber-cuts-on-student's-body thing... I mean, what do _I_ know about such things??


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## shesulsa (Dec 17, 2007)

I thought he was going to perform a horizontal slice, but when he didn't and the cuke was removed from its original location (plunged into the throat) and placed on the groin ... well ... one wonders.


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## exile (Dec 17, 2007)

shesulsa said:


> I thought he was going to perform a horizontal slice, but when he didn't and the cuke was removed from its original location (plunged into the throat) and placed on the groin ... well ... one wonders.



Indeed one does! 

The whole episode left me feeling a little bit...disturbed, as though I had stumbled into an S&M orgy room while trying to find a discount CD shop...


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## newGuy12 (Dec 17, 2007)

:rofl:


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## Cirdan (Dec 19, 2007)

exile said:


> The whole episode left me feeling a little bit...disturbed, as though I had stumbled into an S&M orgy room while trying to find a discount CD shop...


 
You may be right. That fat guy does look a lot like Ron Jeremy....


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## shesulsa (Dec 19, 2007)

Cirdan said:


> You may be right. That fat guy does look a lot like Ron Jeremy....


:uhohh:

Is that how he beat the competition?  :bangahead:


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## tellner (Dec 19, 2007)

Cirdan said:


> You may be right. That fat guy does look a lot like Ron Jeremy....



Ron Jeremy is at the top of his field. And from all reports - I've never seen his work - he has a better weapon and wields it with competent professionalism


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## shesulsa (Dec 19, 2007)

tellner said:


> Ron Jeremy is at the top of his field. And from all reports - I've never seen his work - he has a better weapon and wields it with competent professionalism


... oh the possibilities with this one ... but Bob doesn't like it when his staff members veer a thread off-topic, hence I'll refrain ...

*sigh*


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## exile (Dec 19, 2007)

shesulsa said:


> ... oh the possibilities with this one ... but Bob doesn't like it when his staff members veer a thread off-topic, hence I'll refrain ...
> 
> *sigh*



C'mon, Geo&#8212;I'm sure Bob will forgive you just this once!

Besides, who's to say it will be _judged_ as off-topic, given the weirdness of the original topic? I mean, we're already in Horror Stories, so might as well go for broke, eh?


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## tellner (Dec 19, 2007)

shesulsa said:


> ... oh the possibilities with this one ... but Bob doesn't like it when his staff members veer a thread off-topic, hence I'll refrain ...
> 
> *sigh*



Come on. If you're getting straight lines like that you are *Morally Obligated* to take advantage of them. It says so right here in the Constitution


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## shesulsa (Dec 19, 2007)

Your constitution or mine? :boing1:

But I can't say ... it ... here. :uhoh:


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## RBaddorf (Dec 22, 2007)

NVM looked at the video again.

Sorry for the waste of bandwidth.


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