# You might be a Yankee if...



## KenpoTex (Mar 10, 2004)

You might be a Yankee if...

1. You think barbecue is a verb meaning 'to cook outside'.

2. You think Heinz Ketchup is SPICY!

3. You don't have any problems pronouncing 'Worcestershire sauce' correctly.

4. For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes au gratin to grits.

5. You don't know what a moon pie is.

6. You put sugar in your cornbread.

7. You've never, ever, eaten okra.

8. You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.

9. You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen are on road trips.

10. You have no idea what a polecat is.

11. You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on a poodle.

12. You don't have bangs.

13. You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than Six Flags.

14. More than two generations of your family have been kicked out of the same prep school in Connecticut.

15. You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show.

16. Instead of referring to two or more people as 'y'all', you call them 'you guys', even if both of them are women.

17. You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-and-knife show.

18. You think more money should go to important scientific research at your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach.

19. You don't have at least one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.

20. The last time you smiled was when you prevented someone from getting on an on-ramp on the highway.

21. You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.

22. The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at Neiman Marcus.

23. You call binoculars opera glasses.

24. You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side of the road and stopping.

25. You would never wear pink or an appliqué sweatshirt.

26. You don't know what appliqué is.

27. You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean)

28. You don't have doilies, and you certainly don't know how to make one.

29. You've never been to a craft show.

30. You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.

31. You can't do your laundry without quarters.

32. None of your fur coats are homemade.


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## jkn75 (Mar 10, 2004)

1. Oil and all are pronounced differently. 

2. You have a pick-up truck and no gun rack.


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## OUMoose (Mar 10, 2004)

> 1. Oil and all are pronounced differently.



depending on where you are, it could be all or earl...  :idunno:


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## TonyM. (Mar 10, 2004)

Funny stuff. Here in northern new england (Vermont, New Hampshire and Maine) us goobers are pretty much undistinguishable from southern goobers. 
1.Plenty of farms. check
2.Plenty of cows. check
3.Plenty of chickens. check
4. Pickups with gunracks. check
5. Good NASCAR race. check
6. Tubetops. check
7. Trailers. check
8. 18 wheelers. check
9. Feedstore and tractor hats. check
10. Country music. Sorta
Todays joke is: Politics in northern new england is like the **** of a beautiful woman. One cheek is Vermont and one cheek is Maine.


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## edhead2000 (Mar 10, 2004)

kenpotex said:
			
		

> 5. You don't know what a moon pie is.


 
Mmmmm.............my favorite..........in the microwave..........yum.


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## Rich Parsons (Mar 10, 2004)

jkn75 said:
			
		

> 2. You have a pick-up truck and no gun rack.


A friend of mine in the Navy was at a base in Idaho, and the local police pulled him over for having local plates and no gun rack in his truck. He was not allowed to take firarms on and off the base


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