# Worth the Bother?



## dancingalone (May 24, 2010)

This is more of a conversational question.  I already know the way I have handled the situation, but I would be curious how all of you would have in my shoes.

Scenario:  Prospective student attends one of your classes and wants to join the dojo afterwards.  He is very gung-ho and can't stop talking about how much he likes your training compared to school X and style X, badmouthing his old school and system the whole time.

Do you take him as your student or do you find a reason to send him on his way?  The prospect is intelligent and reasonably athletic and would be an asset to your dojo if he could learn some discretion, manners, and self-reflection.


----------



## Manny (May 24, 2010)

As a sensei I would take him apart afther class and I will let him know  my dojo policy is to not critice other techs,senseis  or schools (dojos) and I will advise him discretion about this if he wants to be a student in my dojo.

Manny


----------



## bushidomartialarts (May 24, 2010)

Agree with Manny, although I'd lead by example rather than dress the new guy down.

"Man, I used to train down at Local Metro Area Karate. Boy did they suck."

"Really? That's Dan Brown's school. What sort of things bothered you about the program there? I talk with Dan every once in a while and I know he'll be glad to get some feedback."

Usually at that point they shut up. Most of the time they badmouth others because they think it will make us like them better. If we demonstrate that we respect other schools despite being in competition with them, we can teach the lesson without getting aggressive (which can result in the student walking away without ever learning any fetchup).


----------



## Blade96 (May 24, 2010)

Heh, my own shotokan sensei badmouthed the kenpo school I had originally came from (which he knew about) more than I ever did! even though I wasnt fussy about my former school I never talked smack. Its not polite. I'm gonna agree with manny on what to do with this may-be-a-student.


----------



## bushidomartialarts (May 24, 2010)

Addendum:  If I ever caught any of my staff badmouthing another school, I would come down like a two-ton heavy thing.


----------



## knuckleheader (May 24, 2010)

dancingalone said:


> This is more of a conversational question. I already know the way I have handled the situation, but I would be curious how all of you would have in my shoes.
> 
> Scenario: Prospective student attends one of your classes and wants to join the dojo afterwards. He is very gung-ho and can't stop talking about how much he likes your training compared to school X and style X, badmouthing his old school and system the whole time.
> 
> Do you take him as your student or do you find a reason to send him on his way? _The prospect is intelligent_ and reasonably athletic and would be an asset to your dojo if he could learn some discretion, manners, and self-reflection.


 
Looks like you'll be teaching someone to see themselves as others do.

hhmmmm, good luck.


----------



## stone_dragone (May 26, 2010)

I concur with what other folks have said.  Take him on as a student after explaining the polite protocol regarding other schools.  That way you get a student and help him be better.


----------



## Grenadier (May 26, 2010)

Dancingalone, I have given the same lecture to certain individuals who have done the very thing you mentioned.  

You don't have to like the other schools.  In fact, it's OK to dislike them.  For that matter, it's not my business what schools you may, or may not like, only that you're satisfied with being given what you're seeking at my school.  

Instead of bashing other schools, though, put the energy into supporting your own school, and let the merits stand on its own.  Bad schools generally end up closing themselves, and there's no sense in wasting precious calories kicking a diseased dog.


----------



## terryl965 (May 26, 2010)

I believe to each there own but inside my school we try to conveye that being resonable to others is always a great policy. Let by gones be by gones and turn the other cheek.


----------

