Why did you start? Why did you stop if so? And why did you come back?

[oftheherd1]

It's more than touching though, having someone's groin in your face is a bit odd male or female lol, being tangled together in a very intimate way with a stranger is disconcerting for any beginner, not only is it intimate it's with someone who is trying to hurt you! We've had men who just wanted to do stand up not grappling because they don't like that close contact, women don't seem to actual mind so much with other women and men they know.

Strangely enough it's not the touching that tends to put women off, it's the thought of punching and kicking people to hurt them. It's not even that they will be kicked or punched. I find the hardest thing is teaching women to be proactive in sparring, to actually go for strikes, for many it's the way they've been brought up ( unlike the female student you had with the brothers) they are told not to hit, not to hurt and years of this is quite hard to overcome. It's not 'ladylike' to fight or to even want to is also a common thought. It doesn't help that men are taught not to hit women and carry that onto martial arts.

Thanks, that all makes sense.

... A while back I went to a JKD class in the local leisure centre, the instructor knew I was coming and was quite happy with it but when I walked in the male students kindly told me the gym classes were in the other hall, I said I was here for martial arts they looked at me disbelieving, they weren't rude or nasty just incredulous which could have been uncomfortable for someone just starting. I didn't say I had any experience in martial arts as it was a completely new style for me, I just wore a plain t-shirt and black Gi bottoms, no belt. A couple of them were quite patronising, it wasn't a conscious thing I think they were trying to be genuinely helpful but it reminded me of garage mechanics when they talk to a woman about her car! A couple of the much older men though when I was holding the pads tried to really hit it as hard as they could, not a problem for me so I just smiled at them, then when it was my turn I returned the favour. If I had been new to martial arts and less confident it was have been hugely off putting. I'm used to working in all male environments so being the only female doesn't bother me. The ones that were most welcoming and helpful were the teenagers, I'm obviously much older than then but they didn't patronise or try to punch too hard, they explained things normally. I will say sparring with the old chaps was fun, we could spar how we wanted the instructor said, so I did, I enjoyed it not sure they did though. Sparring with the teenagers was also fun, they were faster ad had good techniques but they matched themselves to me which was kind and gracious. Sadly, I only went a couple of more times before the instructor gave up the class. I hope the teenagers found somewhere else to go, they were a credit to themselves.

Very kindly put to describe some of us old fogies and our less than enlightened ways concerning women. ;-)

 

[Tez3]

Thanks, that all makes sense.



Very kindly put to describe some of us old fogies and our less than enlightened ways concerning women. ;-)

Being an old fogey myself......... These chaps were in their fifties and low belts so hadn't been training long perhaps a year at most. I tend to think now it was less about their gender or age and more to do with they finally had someone of a lower grade they could 'impress'.

 

[hussaf]

I stopped between7-8th grass because I stared working, and getting into girls and sports. Got back in my junior or senior year in HS because I missed it lot and could manage my time better. When I can back, my karate dojo had started training aikido with another group, and that group also did iaido, judo, and jujitsu. So I got into all that stuff. Since then the karate dojo closed down and I've been training with that other group for about 15 years now


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[KenpoMaster805]

when I was a kid i took Taekwondo and quit when i was yellow because my dad was sick then when i enter college I meet a friend name steve he would teach me Eskrima Tai chi chi gung and wing chun then after that I moved to Bakersfield Ca I took shotokan for 6 months I quit when i was a high Orange because i moved back to my hometown Oxnard ca when I moved back to my hometown I took American Kenpo Karate and been doing American Kenpo Karate for almost 3 years and im a green belt going to be brown in December im also member of my karate's swat team and soon to be assistant instructor

 

[Wilde]

I started training in Taekwondo Chung Do Kwan when I was eleven, then I started Hapkido about a year and a half ago, and my newest art is Wado Kai Karate. I still train in all on a regular basis, martial arts are my life, I have not found one thing I love more than doing martial arts.

 

[Tez3]

Interesting that someone, a male, disagrees with a female's point of view! ( yeah thanks for the 'disagree') Perhaps females aren't supposed to have a point of view or that as a male, he thinks he knows how women think better than a female.

 

[marques]

Started because I was young and watched movies. Quite enough. Then it was a physical activity with practical use, outside the 'sport'.
After a decade politics in the organisation... put me out. And no reasonable alternative to continue.
An incident made me rethink. I started training with friends.
Moved away... And nothing good enough again (according to my values). And little/no free time. Tried a few things, anyway.
Moved again. Tried archery. But was not it that grabs me. Then I found a nice little club just around the corner. Quite happy now.
Will move again soon... (It is becoming monotonous/repetitive. But only to the reader...)

 

[lifelongstudent1]

I began my martial art training officially year 1978, in Tae Kwon Do (traditional style, my Instructor leaned more toward Hapkido). I stayed in it all the way until I entered the Marine Corps in 1984 and was a 1st dan black belt. I was honorable discharged in 1993 after severing my Achilles tendon. I got away from the Martial arts, do to knee pain. YEARS, later I finally got a knee replacement. I have now got back into a totally different art, which has less "high kicks", at 50 years young.

 

[stephlcurry]

I practiced Hapkido for about 3 years but quit because my husband didn't think it was "ladylike" for me to come home with bruises and stuff. Obviously that relationship eventually fizzled and died.

I am currently looking into various places locally to venture out into other forms of martial arts that are closer to my new place.

 

[kuniggety]

I practiced Hapkido for about 3 years but quit because my husband didn't think it was "ladylike" for me to come home with bruises and stuff. Obviously that relationship eventually fizzled and died.

I am currently looking into various places locally to venture out into other forms of martial arts that are closer to my new place.

Sounds like a good guy to kick to the curb.

 

[stephlcurry]

Oh he definitely has been... Next time I will find a guy with enough of a spine to deal with me, haha!

 

[lifelongstudent1]

Not just a spine, but one who respects you and your passions. I been there once myself with EX, will not happen again.

 

[Flatfish]

I started with Judo when I was 11 or 12 or so and did that for about four years. Got up to green belt, then our club leadership made some personnel changes that really ticked me off and I quit, started Life guarding etc. In college I took Aikido for a semester but I did not like the atmosphere in the group very much. Then life happened, grad school, postdoc, real job, kids.

I got back into MA when I tried to find an activity for my son, then 4 1/2. We checked out TKD, he liked, his sister wanted to try, she liked, and I felt stupid sitting around watching them, so I joined up, too. That was about 2 1/2 years ago, my daughter has since quit in favor of gymnastics but my son and I still train.

Eventually when the kids get a bit older I would like to check out some FMA but time does not allow that right now. Alternatively, if they mess up my knee surgery next week, TKD might be out for the future and I'll be looking for something else with fewer kicks.

 

[Gerry Seymour]

As someone whoi stopped doing martial arts and am know aiming for come back, why did you stop (if so) and why are you coming back? For me, I first started doing Karate because, well, I don't know why. Probably because at age 9 or 10 my parents thought it was a good idea. And I stopped because, well, I was a kid and probably couldn't be bothered any more. As for TKD, I started that at 12/13 because some friends were doing it. And I stopped at age 16 because of laziness mainly and I just wasn't feeling it anymore.

I am coming back because I felt I didn't give them a fair chance and it was always in the back of my mind, but I always found excuses (it costs too much, I work shifts, Game of Thrones is on, etc etc) but now I feel motivated to knuckle down and get back with something I've always wanted to do.

So I want to hear your stories!

The first time I started in MA (Karate, that time, at the YMCA), I'm pretty sure I started because I'd just watched a Chuck Norris movie or something. I was 12. I stopped because my instructor closed the program - I think she moved.

The second time (this time Judo), I started because I had a real interest after seeing some Judo (I forget where), and one of my dad's friends opened a program at the college where he taught. I was 13, and the instructor soon added a Karate class, as well, which I took part in. I stopped that time because my instructor moved to Jordan to teach there. (Another instructor moving away?)

The third time I started (finally into NGA, my primary art), I had seen a demo by the chief instructor, and was immediately interested in the art and his control. I was 18. After some time, money and college got in the way and I dropped out for a while.

The fourth time I started (back to NGA, the same school now run by his senior student), I was just going back to the art that had been in my blood since I started it. I was 22. I stayed with that until that instructor closed the school. (Why did all those instructors run away?)

A couple of months later (I think I'd be 27 or so now), one of the other instructors re-opened that school, and I trained there for another 10 or 12 years (also teaching some classes) until money issues made me take a break. During that break, I started working on the curriculum for Shojin-ryu. While I was working on that, I kept practicing and dabbling in other arts (seminars, discussions and meeting up with friends in other styles, and some private lessons). Finally, I couldn't stand it any more and opened my own small program.

I'm probably not the only one here who has come back so many times. Once you find something you enjoy and grow from as much as I do in the MA, you just keep going back.

 

[Juany118]

I started Martial Arts in High School with Foil and Saber Fencing. Why? Initially because, well Alexander Dumas. After I started though the physicality, strategy etc hooked me. My next formal training was Aikido. I was looking for a Martial Art that also delved into Philosophy as well as Practical Self Defense (my first Sensei definitely leaned towards the Aiki-Jujutsu origins of the art). I took some time off because that Sensei moved and all the Aikido dojos left in the area were those that leaned more heavily to the Philosophical side but eventually I delved into Ryushinkan. While the school was close to where I work it was a 40 minute commute from where I was living at the time and the art just didn't "click" enough with me to make that kind of commute worth while.

I took some time off. For quite sometime my natural speed and the conditioning training I did, along with the skills I maintained from my Aikido and Ryushinkan days served me well. However I kept getting older and the knuckleheads I deal with at work were continuously replaced with a younger generation of knucklehead. So I went looking around for a school that taught Martial Arts with the following question asked of the Instructors... paraphrase "I am a LEO, do you teach not only an art that is practical for that line of work but is your attitude/method of teaching also appropriate for it." The last question is because the most appropriate Art mechanically can be made inappropriate by the focus/method of the teacher. I really wasn't looking for a particular Art and in this line of inquiry I eventually stumbled on the school I am in now which teaches both Wing Chun and Kali, each complete, in the same class. What made me chose this one, over the Krav Maga school BJJ School and Muay Thai School were the following...

1. BJJ is very much about going to the ground. I do need to know how to deal with that I also need to avoid that whenever possible.
2. Muay Thai is dang effective but many of their techniques again create work issues. The "clinch" invites someone to go to my weapon as but one example.

I almost went Krav Maga BUT the following made me chose my School. WC in and of itself is an excellent "bridging" art to get in close and set up to apply the Aikido locks and throws I already knew. Inosanto Kali not only addresses locks, throws and ground fighting AND right out of the gate the stick work is directly applicable to my favorite "go-to" less lethal tool. Call me an "old head" but I trust my expandable baton more than my taser. I will also admit that it is really the Kali that I fell in love with. I am competent in WC, but to actually test in it I need to go to the mother school (part of the deal with GM Cheung to set the school up the way it is under his "umbrella".) However I don't know if I will ever actually test in it (it's in Jersey and my school is in PA). I can test in Kali at my school and the flow, the rhythm, the no nonsense practicality of it literally sings to me.