That's a big part of the point. If an adult chooses to go to Bob Jones University, that's one thing. But this minor's parents are sending him to a school that severely restricts his rights as a condition of enrolment. That I have some issues with.
Teen May Be Suspended for Prom Attendance
- Thread starter MA-Caver
- Start date
That's a big part of the point. If an adult chooses to go to Bob Jones University, that's one thing. But this minor's parents are sending him to a school that severely restricts his rights as a condition of enrolment. That I have some issues with.
celtic_crippler
Senior Master
It's a private school, the family is aware of their rules and were reminded. He broke the rules. It's that simple.
It's not fair to make a judgement assaigning your value system to the situation. Though you may not agree with their beliefs, reason dictates you must accept their values are what apply in this situation. Consider that it would be extremely strange for this family to enroll their child in a school, especially a religeous based school, that did not mirror their own beliefs. Therefore, they should have expected negative repercussions.
Personally I think the school's rules are ridiculous but if you believe in freedom of choice then you have to accept freedom of consequences.
The student has no argument and must accept the school's decision IMHO.
It's not fair to make a judgement assaigning your value system to the situation. Though you may not agree with their beliefs, reason dictates you must accept their values are what apply in this situation. Consider that it would be extremely strange for this family to enroll their child in a school, especially a religeous based school, that did not mirror their own beliefs. Therefore, they should have expected negative repercussions.
Personally I think the school's rules are ridiculous but if you believe in freedom of choice then you have to accept freedom of consequences.
The student has no argument and must accept the school's decision IMHO.
CuongNhuka
Senior Master
Dancing was a sin for a while (like 100 years I think)
There are a few separate issues here.
While I strongly disagree with religious based schools, and religion in general, this is not about that. This is about the application of rules outside of school grounds, outside of school property. I feel that in general the school is crazy, however they have the right to implement and interpret their rules as they see fit. The school is crazy, but correct in their actions.
- ItÂ’s a private school. Hence a private organization that sets its own rules. (I donÂ’t know what the rules are south of the border, but up here private schools still have a set minimum curriculum they have to teach.)
- The student attended; yes his parents enrolled him, of his/their own free will.
- Does the school maintain authority over the student outside of school property? ItÂ’s a school sponsored event, does that count? On a school trip he would need to act accordingly as a representative of the school.
- You canÂ’t just follow the rules you like or agree with, if you are putting yourself in a private group, you need to follow the generally applicable rules.
While I strongly disagree with religious based schools, and religion in general, this is not about that. This is about the application of rules outside of school grounds, outside of school property. I feel that in general the school is crazy, however they have the right to implement and interpret their rules as they see fit. The school is crazy, but correct in their actions.
ShelleyK
Brown Belt
Key word.. WAS
shihansmurf
Black Belt
I gotta back Bill up on this one. The parents had to know going into this what the rules were at this school and they chose to allow their son to violate them knowing ahead of time that there would be consequences. If the kid didn't want to face those consequences he should have made a different choice.
At the end of the day this is a private institution that the boy is a voluntary member of. Its not like this is a public school that is attempting this sort of thing. The boy doesn't have a right to a private education. He, or his family, chose this baggage for him when they elected to choose the benefits of a private education over a public one. Seems like they want their cake and to be able to eat it as well.
He made his bed, let him lie in it.
He has a girlfriend to keep him company, afterall.
Mark
LuckyKBoxer
Master Black Belt
The parents had to know going into this what the rules were at this school and they chose to allow their son to violate them knowing ahead of time that there would be consequences. If the kid didn't want to face those consequences he should have made a different choice.
At the end of the day this is a private institution that the boy is a voluntary member of. Its not like this is a public school that is attempting this sort of thing. The boy doesn't have a right to a private education. He, or his family, chose this baggage for him when they elected to choose the benefits of a private education over a public one. Seems like they want their cake and to be able to eat it as well.
He made his bed, let him lie in it.
He has a girlfriend to keep him company, afterall.
Mark
I think alot of people are working off of part of the story only.
Just to make a couple things clear here..
The student signed a voluntary code of conduct before entering the school year that stated things he would not participate in anywhere.
The student and the parents and the school all knew about the kid going to the prom before the event happened. The rules and the consequences were squarely on the table, everyone knew what they were, agreed what they were, and went forward with going to the prom anyways.
The school did not expell him, or erase his work. All they have done is forbidden him from taking part in the graduation ceremony, and suspending him from the end of the school year, but will allow him to take his tests and get his diploma.
When all the facts are out there, I find it really hard to find a problem, other then a disagreement with their chosen code of conduct.... but thats not my decision to make.
That's not clear. He's a minor. His parents may be sending him to a school where he'll be forced to miss many of the standard rites of young adulthood--at least one of which was obviously important to him.
If he was an adult at a religious college, full agreement with you. But how far can a parent go in restricting their kids' rights? Is it mandatory that he still be in school at 17 in that state? You simply can't say that as a minor what he's doing is voluntary. He may hate the place.
I don't have anything against Protestants, or Protestant schools. However, such education is a product that is bought and sold like everything else on the free market. The people that are buying are parents that are generally looking for this kind of school that incorporates staunch discipline like this one is.
Perhaps the boy clearly know he was to do no dancing, no where, no how. But, he went to prom anyway and got in trouble by his own bragging, or because someone ratted him out. This was not clear by the article. If that's the case, then I think the boy needs to take responsibility for his actions. That doesn't bother me.
What does bother me is if this is all basically a marketing effort. If the school has a policy that is more vague, and they are trying to make an example out of him to show potential "buyers" that they have tough disciplinary standards, then I think that is wrong.
Perhaps the boy clearly know he was to do no dancing, no where, no how. But, he went to prom anyway and got in trouble by his own bragging, or because someone ratted him out. This was not clear by the article. If that's the case, then I think the boy needs to take responsibility for his actions. That doesn't bother me.
What does bother me is if this is all basically a marketing effort. If the school has a policy that is more vague, and they are trying to make an example out of him to show potential "buyers" that they have tough disciplinary standards, then I think that is wrong.
shihansmurf
Black Belt
I'm not sure about what the law specifically says about how far a parent can go in restricting a minors "rights", but I'm of the opinion that if we hold the parents accountable for the actions of the child and the child's welfare to the degree that we allow the parent to make decisions for the child such as where they will attend school then at that point I'd consider that as voluntary attendance.
Too ofter we hear the lament after a child, which is what we are talking about here a 17 year old child, commits a crime of "Where were the parents?" , but then we are steadily eroding parental authority in our culture. This isn't a comment aimed at you, so no offense is intended, but I'm always amazed at how often I hear the cries of "The Children Have rights". Insofar as they have the right not to be abused, I concur, but as to miss prom, life sucks, deal and move on. Mom and Dad made a choice for him that they thought was in his best interest. When he is an adult(shortly, in this case) he can make whatever choices he wants and more power to him. I think he just got a damn good lesson in accountability and responsibility for our actions. He knew the what would happen if he attended prom with this girl, went anyway, and is getting a slap on the wrist. It ain't the first time a kid has gotten in trouble over a girl, and I'm sure it won't be the last. Good object lesson.
Mark
Archangel M
Senior Master
If Im responsible for my kids actions (legally) till hes 18 then..no my decisions trump his desires.
Parenthood isnt a democracy.
Parenthood isnt a democracy.
Brian Jones
Blue Belt
Restricting your child's "rights" are a big part of parenting. I enjoy rights as an adult my chidlren do not because they are not ready, nor mature enough to make those decisions.
Brian Jones
Blue Belt
Actually no It wasn't.
At what point is the line of reasonableness crossed? A dance is just a dance, but this sounds like a pretty restrictive group.
People under 18 are still people, and still deserve freedoms.
Take away enough of those freedoms and everyone agrees it is child abuse.
Telling a 17-year old that they are not allowed physical contact with the opposite sex, are not allowed to dance, are not allowed to listen to anything but gospel music, etc. Basically telling them that if they don't suppress a good chunk of their strongest natural desires and feeling they are bad people and will be punished in this life, and the next is riding that line pretty close (if it hasn't crossed it) IMO.
Suspended for Dancing
And at the other end of the spectrum:
Pa. high school orders shot glasses as prom favors
And at the other end of the spectrum:
Pa. high school orders shot glasses as prom favors
ShelleyK
Brown Belt
Thats actually not uncommon! I actually have a couple of shot glasses from 2 proms I went to as a teen!
