Ya'll are so naughty! lol!
I think what may help you "relax" in your movements in Si Lim Tao may be to focus on flowing from one movement to the other. Say when you do tan sau to (what we call chit sau) and back to tan sau, flow each movement from the other. Don't stop in between movements to much.
I've seen a couple of WC/WT stylists do SLT form where they kinda "jerk" from one movement to the other to "accentuate" each separate movement from the next. But, I've found that if you just flow from one technique to the other you'll be more relaxed in your movements. Your structure will come because your going slow.
Focus on flowing from one to the next movement. (and yes, your going to be using some muscle strength to actually lift your arm. But, don't get hung up on that. It just doesn't take alot of physical strength to lift your arm up in the air and move it around.
I try to keep WC/WT simple because well, it is simple.)
We had a couple of guys that studied Wing Tzun for a long time come in and when they did the form they focused more on (what seemed like to me) kinda "jerking" from one technique to the other. I guess to focus on forward pressure or accuentate each movement.
Not that this is wrong or anything, I just have noticed it does make them more "tense" when doing the form. And we do the form differently.
See how this Sigung does the form. It's so slow!!! And only 3 and a half minutes, but it seems so much more slow than that! lol! We do the first part really, really, reaeeeeally slow.
That's your chi building section, by the way. internal energy and forward though force come from the first part of the form, as I've been taught.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNX8VG_t6to
When each movement is completed focus on already beginning the next movement to flow to. Don't "stop" for each specific movement. (yes, you still kinda focus on accentuating between techniques just 'softer") Flow from one to the other.
Forward thought "force" is a mindset. You just "think" forward, even when your movements are coming back to the centerline. Even whey your moving backward with hands or stance your intent is still forward. No movement from your body will actually improve this. Your working with "intent". Like a spring that is always "loaded" or "coiled" ready to spring.
It's just weird at first. I just litterally think the word "forward" over and over in my head when I do the form, application, or even sparring. This silences everything else my mind would want to bother me with and allows me to utilize true forward pressure and spring energy.
But, that just helps me. It might be a different thing for someone else.
As for the "abduction" well, from reading ya'lls posts, I may be doing it wrong. lol! We focus on major tension in the legs, and butt. We don't bring the knees together so close as a fist distance away. But we really focus on keeping alot of tension in the legs and butt, while keeping the upper body "loose and relaxed". (kinda makes me think of the movie Kill Bill vol. 2 when she meets Pai Mai and she spars him and tries to kick him in the nuts.. remember? He was in Basic SLT stance and when she kicked then he brought the knees closer together to catch her foot when she tried to rack him. like a "block". a fist distance away. That would be a great way to demonstrate when you actually use the stance in that position.) But anyways... lol! (I love that stupid movie!)
One drill you could do for stance... and I think it would help you not be too tense but keep the right amount of tension in your stance at the same time.....
You could use a children's ball, get one at a dollar store. One of those little rubber balls about 6 inches in diameter, (ya know, like with spiderman on it or something. lol!)
...and put that between your theighs just above the knee. If you squeeze too hard the soft rubber ball will kinda "sqwish" out from your legs. If your too light it will eventually drop. Sometimes we use a volleyball, but I've found that the softer kids rubber balls are better.
But, here's a different spin on using a ball....
Try to walk in stance while keeping the ball between your knees. I used to have a kids class where we had "ball races". Where the kids had to try to "run" from one wall to the other while keeping the ball between their legs in a race. If it dropped they had to stop and start over from the exact place where it dropped. This kept them from "cheating". Kiddos loved it, and it was a good way to "trick" them into doing stancework.
But, I found out that their stances ended up being better than the adults because of this game, and more "versitile" when sparring. So, if you can get an adult to "play with a ball" when training stance you'll get a better stance.
I'd have them do this when chainpunching the moving bags and focus mits too. That way they got used to ALWAYS using abduction when applying Wing Chun application and sparring.
If you can turn, pivot, and step in SLT basic stance while punching and keeping the ball between your legs then you'll keep your "structure" in a pinch, or a fight. And soon, you won't even have to think about it either.
Sifu Hubbie tells me that when he trained with GM Fung that he'd make them litterally run around in SLT stance like jogging in a way. Try running in SLT stance for a considerable distance and see how it makes your legs feel. Then see how you use the stance when sparring or doing WT application. It will become more of a natural way to stand for you, and you can focus more on your hand work without thinking so much on the two at the same time.
Hope that helps. Little wordy. Sorry.