Office Monkeys

Cryozombie

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A tourist walks into a pet shop in Silicon Valley, and is browsing around the cages on display. While he's there, another customer walks in and says to the shopkeeper, "I'll have a C monkey, please".

The shopkeeper nods, goes over to a cage at the side of the shop and takes out a monkey. He fits a collar and leash and hands it to the customer, saying "That'll be $5,000". The customer pays and walks out with his monkey.

Startled, the tourist goes over to the shopkeeper and says, "That was a very expensive monkey, most of them are only a few hundred dollars. Why did it cost so much?"

"Oh", says the shopkeeper, "that monkey can program in C with very fast, tight code, no bugs, well worth the money."

The tourist starts to look at the monkeys in the cage. He says to the shop keeper, "That one's even more expensive, $10,000! What does it do?"

"Oh", says the shopkeeper, "that one's a C++ monkey; it can manage object-oriented programming, Visual C++, even some Java, all the really useful stuff."

The tourist looks round for a little longer and sees a third monkey in a cage on its own. The price tag round its neck says $50,000.

He gasps to the shop keeper, "That one costs more than all the others put together! What on earth does it do?"

"Well," says the shopkeeper, "I don't know if it actually does anything, but says it's a Consultant."
 
We 50k Monkeys are only worth what the clients are willing to pay... don't blame us!
 
We 50k Monkeys are only worth what the clients are willing to pay... don't blame us!

Not blaming you, blaming our gov that wants to cut education, health care and worker benefits as well require us to work for free from time to time. And the monkey I am referring to is nothing compared to the corporate monkey's (mostly gov pals and pals of gov pals) that the state is associated with the average of 25% of them getting paid greater than $100,000 a year.

But I am off post, sorry.
 
That reminds me of a very similar joke about a store that sold brains. It was a teacher, a rocket scientist and a politician. The politician's is WAY more than the other two. The punch line is that it has never been used before.
 
Once upon a tiem I was dating the sister-in-law of Mike Hammond, one o the founders of Gateway Computers. A rich guy with lake house at Okoboji. SO there he was, drinking his PBR, when we met. he asked what I do, and I told him I was a consultant. he says "the 2 dirtiest words I know both start with C" LOL. he then asked me how I got to be a consultant, and having just heard him cracking Stripes quips with his friend, I replied "Army Training Sir" and we were buddies all weekend :)
 
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