Bill, you and I agree that self defense is often not fighting ability. I think you’re spot on when you talk about self defense as things that actually make you safer. That can be as simple as not going to a bar or avoiding other high risk behaviors.
Personally, I think self defense is highly contextual. So all that said, what do you think is effective self defense for people who are older or with physical limitations? What sort of training and skills will actually make them safer?
I believe it requires an even-handed and level-headed evaluation of risk. Not the risk we imagine, the risk that actually exists.
As you said, context. As martial artists, we're trained to see risk as a physical threat, one which has to be approached with physical acts of self-defense. Of course those risks are real, and of course martial arts training is one way to address them.
But what are we most likely to die of? Heart disease. At least in the western world. One would think that this is a risk that all would take seriously and take steps to defend against. However, that's not really sexy, is it? Self-defense by eating right and losing weight and exercising?
As I've mentioned before, I see self-defense as running the gamut of threats, from natural disasters to physical and mental health, to common sense (avoiding bars, don't fight for ego or imagined slights or 'honor', etc), to actual physical violence.
In my world, the threat of physical violence is shockingly small. If that were my only reason for training, in my opinion, it would be a poor reason (for me).
In the world of actual violence, I've certainly talked my way out of quite a few thumpings, sometimes after having talked my way into them in the first place. Learning to curb my mouth is a skill I'm still not as good at as I should be. My father used to refer to it as letting my mouth write a check my body could not cash.
Soft skills like body language, choice of words, inflection, eye contact, attitude, and just generally not being a puffed-up jerk spoiling for a fight can certainly be self-defense techniques, even if they don't give out belts in how not to get punched.
The types of violence I might actually think could befall me would things like a carjacking or a strong-arm robbery, since I work in a not-nice city in SE Michigan and commute through some sketchy areas. And frankly, I'm not about to bust open a case of whoopass on someone who sticks a gun in my face and demands my car or wallet. I'm most likely to hand it over and do my best to make myself scarce with a quickness. I would only ever consider a violent response if the attacker attempted to take me somewhere, which I honestly think is not likely to happen.
So yes, I train for reasons other than strictly self-defense with violence. And I'm not that smart myself; even with heart disease, I don't always make the right choices regarding heart health, and I am doubly guilty because I know that heart disease is far, far, more likely to claim my life than a guy with a gun and a hoodie.
Ultimately, I guess we all have to choose what threats we'll defend ourselves against.
