I almost broke my nose and it was hilarious.

Has anyone else hurt themselves attempting martial arts? Let's hear some funny stuff.
My very first class, the instructor was teaching the high block. He gave the analogy of bringing the arm up as if I were going to wipe my nose on my sleeve. I promptly punched myself in my own nose.
 
I once blocked a pool noodle and the noodle wrapped around my arm, scratched my eye, and resulted in a corneal abrasion that resulted in antibiotic treatment and a useless eye for a week. Worse than getting hit from an actual fist.
 
So I was working on this take down and basically did it wrong, I grabbed the guy by the waist and tried to rotate my hips and pull him over me leg, but his back was facing me so I ended up bringing his elbow into my face.

We laughed for like 5 minutes then tried it again and I got it right. Has anyone else hurt themselves attempting martial arts? Let's hear some funny stuff.

I got hurt in the dojo by being a dork.

We have a 'Bob' and I was goofing off with some of the kids in one of the kids classes during a break. They were punching Bob and I stood up behind him and pretended I was Bob's arms, so they'd have to duck or block when they punched. Unfortunately, that put my face directly behind Bob's face. One kid promptly and effectively drilled Bob in the nose, which translated to my nose really well through the back of Bob's foam head.

I've probably done more than a couple other idiotic things, but that was the one that stands out in my memory.
 
I was practicing some full-force kicks on a heavy bag once, and decided to practice an instep kick (this refers to an upward kick). The bag was at the perfect height for it, so I just turned loose and kicked hard. I was pleased with the impact until I noticed the pain. That's when I remembered the heavy bag had an attachment ring on the bottom, too. It took weeks for that bruise to fully heal.
 
The same thing happened to me but I do that kick with my shin rather than the instep. So my shin had this huge purple knot on it for awhile, I played it off real cool though when I did it, didn't flinch, just one manly tear down my cheek.

I know never to do that again.
 
My very first class, the instructor was teaching the high block. He gave the analogy of bringing the arm up as if I were going to wipe my nose on my sleeve. I promptly punched myself in my own nose.
I think 99% of us have all done something like that when practicing blocks lol heck I still do it. The other day doing a form I was doing a block while bringing my other hand back to my hip and I hit my knuckles against each other. Yeah that sucked
 
I think 99% of us have all done something like that when practicing blocks lol heck I still do it. The other day doing a form I was doing a block while bringing my other hand back to my hip and I hit my knuckles against each other. Yeah that sucked
One of the elbow strikes taught in mainline NGA teaches the hands kept within an inch of each other at the knuckles. I can't count the number of times I punched my own hand doing that damned thing.
 
I think this thread needs to be revived.

Here's a tale:

I strolled by one of my senseis one day on the mat and playfully attempted a foot sweep. In response he threw me with a surprise... alright I can't remember the name but it's the throw where you put uke in a sort of headlock and throw them off your waist. Stupid me thought nothing of it when he put me in a headlock, I just thought, "alright I deserve whatever choke or noogie is coming."

That's why the throw was a surprise, had no idea what was coming till I was on the ground fairly certain I'd broken my hip (lesson learned, don't pick fights with black belts during water break!)

Sorry if that was lame, but I think this falls under the thread as I hurt myself by poking the bear.

I could reminisce about the time I didn't know I broke my ankle and walked on it for 2 weeks (and still went to practice!) but I don't wanna bore you guys further...
 
I think this thread needs to be revived.

Here's a tale:

I strolled by one of my senseis one day on the mat and playfully attempted a foot sweep. In response he threw me with a surprise... alright I can't remember the name but it's the throw where you put uke in a sort of headlock and throw them off your waist. Stupid me thought nothing of it when he put me in a headlock, I just thought, "alright I deserve whatever choke or noogie is coming."

That's why the throw was a surprise, had no idea what was coming till I was on the ground fairly certain I'd broken my hip (lesson learned, don't pick fights with black belts during water break!)

Sorry if that was lame, but I think this falls under the thread as I hurt myself by poking the bear.

I could reminisce about the time I didn't know I broke my ankle and walked on it for 2 weeks (and still went to practice!) but I don't wanna bore you guys further...
I think most of us have "poked the bear" once or twice. Some bears respond more notably.
 
Sounds like you're talking from experience. You've poked the bear I take it?

Been there a few times. Once earned me a bruised sternum. The other times were gentler, but actually more obviously humiliating. I've also been the bear a few times. One of my students seems to enjoy poking the bear.
 
Been there a few times. Once earned me a bruised sternum. The other times were gentler, but actually more obviously humiliating. I've also been the bear a few times. One of my students seems to enjoy poking the bear.

Us students enjoy that. It's all fun and games until it turns into The Revenant.

You can't say there's more humiliating stories and not tell! What do you think this forum is for? :D
 
Us students enjoy that. It's all fun and games until it turns into The Revenant.

You can't say there's more humiliating stories and not tell! What do you think this forum is for? :D
Well, the more humiliating ones were simply visually humiliating. I remember one rather large senior student (he may have been the senior brown belt at the time) who was also a bouncer. I was probably a blue belt (white-yellow-blue-green-purple-brown-black). He was demonstrating a technique on another student, and I came out with the "what if" questions. You know, when the student starts saying, "Well, what if he has a knife in that hand? Or what if he has a buddy? Or what if he is Aquaman and has three eels with him?" I didn't get to the Aquaman thing, because he stopped me at "has a buddy". He looked at me, and said, "Okay, you're the buddy." Then he started the same technique as before. I stepped in halfway through and grabbed his arm to stop him.

Or so I thought. Instead, he finished the technique as if I didn't exist. I'm pretty sure the other student knew I existed, since his butt was on my head when it was all said and done. No injuries, but I do wish Aquaman had shown up to stop that.
 
Well, the more humiliating ones were simply visually humiliating. I remember one rather large senior student (he may have been the senior brown belt at the time) who was also a bouncer. I was probably a blue belt (white-yellow-blue-green-purple-brown-black). He was demonstrating a technique on another student, and I came out with the "what if" questions. You know, when the student starts saying, "Well, what if he has a knife in that hand? Or what if he has a buddy? Or what if he is Aquaman and has three eels with him?" I didn't get to the Aquaman thing, because he stopped me at "has a buddy". He looked at me, and said, "Okay, you're the buddy." Then he started the same technique as before. I stepped in halfway through and grabbed his arm to stop him.

Or so I thought. Instead, he finished the technique as if I didn't exist. I'm pretty sure the other student knew I existed, since his butt was on my head when it was all said and done. No injuries, but I do wish Aquaman had shown up to stop that.

Yeah, I've had a few of those what if scenarios. Always have my face planted in the mat or my limbs cranked a tad too enthusiastically by the end :D God I'm making it sound like my senseis are monsters, they're awesome, they just know it takes a bit more to keep me in line.

Aquaman, really? If you want a superhero to show up don't wish for the one that can ask a piece of kelp how it's day was, my God, get Wolverine or Winter Soldier in there! Or if you're a DC man, Slade Wilson!
 
Yeah, I've had a few of those what if scenarios. Always have my face planted in the mat or my limbs cranked a tad too enthusiastically by the end :D God I'm making it sound like my senseis are monsters, they're awesome, they just know it takes a bit more to keep me in line.

Aquaman, really? If you want a superhero to show up don't wish for the one that can ask a piece of kelp how it's day was, my God, get Wolverine or Winter Soldier in there! Or if you're a DC man, Slade Wilson!
Yeah, but those guys would actually win. I'm not going to manage a useful wristlock or takedown on Wolverine. Aquaman and 3 eels? I think I can take 'em!
 
Yeah, but those guys would actually win. I'm not going to manage a useful wristlock or takedown on Wolverine. Aquaman and 3 eels? I think I can take 'em!

Perhaps... depends on your rank I think. And I don't mean experience. If your belt is the color of the eels you could trick them into thinking one of their own sided with you and turn them on Aquaman.
 
Perhaps... depends on your rank I think. And I don't mean experience. If your belt is the color of the eels you could trick them into thinking one of their own sided with you and turn them on Aquaman.
Undefiable logic, Zoltan.
 
On the poking the bear point, I personally have never done that, so I have no idea what you are talking about :)

Way back in my Jujutsu days this sort of thing happened all the time, but for the most part it was all pretty friendly. However one day a senior student, a Brown belt, had recently won a golden gloves competition and came to class with an attitude, which he freely spread around to all of us younger less experienced students. Then he did something real stupid, he threw a punch at and hit sensei in the cheek, Sensei moved his head and went with the force but said nothing. Then at the end of class we always did some sparing and after all of us kids were done sensei said he felt like a bit of sparing today and called the golden gloves champ to the floor. The bow was the last time the golden gloves champ stood up for the next few minutes, He spent the entire match knocked down in various ways, getting up and being knocked down again.

A few months later the same guy won another match and again came to class and spread this attitude around the younger less experienced students but avoided hitting Sensei. He did however slap a couple of the younger students.... again he sparred sensei but at the end of that match he was asked to leave and told never return.

Some people seem to have a propensity to poking the bear
 
On the poking the bear point, I personally have never done that, so I have no idea what you are talking about :)

Way back in my Jujutsu days this sort of thing happened all the time, but for the most part it was all pretty friendly. However one day a senior student, a Brown belt, had recently won a golden gloves competition and came to class with an attitude, which he freely spread around to all of us younger less experienced students. Then he did something real stupid, he threw a punch at and hit sensei in the cheek, Sensei moved his head and went with the force but said nothing. Then at the end of class we always did some sparing and after all of us kids were done sensei said he felt like a bit of sparing today and called the golden gloves champ to the floor. The bow was the last time the golden gloves champ stood up for the next few minutes, He spent the entire match knocked down in various ways, getting up and being knocked down again.

A few months later the same guy won another match and again came to class and spread this attitude around the younger less experienced students but avoided hitting Sensei. He did however slap a couple of the younger students.... again he sparred sensei but at the end of that match he was asked to leave and told never return.

Some people seem to have a propensity to poking the bear

That's not poking the bear, that's intentionally putting your *** between its teeth and closing its mouth for it. I get it if people get amped at tourneys but he took it way too far.

Hope he bit his tongue on some falls :p
 
That's not poking the bear, that's intentionally putting your *** between its teeth and closing its mouth for it. I get it if people get amped at tourneys but he took it way too far.

Hope he bit his tongue on some falls :p
I've been that bear a time or two. I get annoyed when someone decides to show their might to lower-ranking students for ego's sake, especially when I don't have the authority to call them on it. I'm the nice, quiet guy (okay, maybe not so quiet...), until I'm not. It's normally not something others in the school would even notice. Most students can barely tell when one black belt gives another a double-leg sweep, versus a standard single-leg sweep, much less how hard the throw actually was.
 
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