Heh

Jade Tigress

RAWR
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Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

 
Shouldn't this joke belong in the confines of the LLR? Huh? I mean really... s'not funny!
For men this is a scary thought. Might spur some unwanted ideas here. Geez.



(j/k)
Kinda like
Q: What does a red-headed woman do after sex?

A: She unties you.
 
Shouldn't this joke belong in the confines of the LLR? Huh? I mean really... s'not funny!
For men this is a scary thought. Might spur some unwanted ideas here. Geez.



(j/k)
Kinda like
Q: What does a red-headed woman do after sex?

A: She unties you.
Obsessing over the LLR again, are we? I'll tell Juan you're ready.
 
Obsessing over the LLR again, are we? I'll tell Juan you're ready.
No, not obsessing... I've accepted the fact you gals need to have that private space... that's cool and sometimes necessary. Tell Juan to chill out and peel more grapes for you. I'm alright, thanks.
 
Q: Why haven't they sent any women to the moon?
A: Because it doesn't need cleaning yet.

Q: How many men does it take to open a can of pop?
A: None. It should be open when the woman gives it to you.

Q: Why can't women drive?
A: There ain't no road between the kitchen and the bedroom!

Q: Why doon't women need watches?
A: Duh!! There's a clock on the stove.

Q: Why did the woman cross the road?
A: Forget that, why is she out of the kitchen?!!

Q: What does it mean when your wife serves you breakfast in bed?
A: You made her chain too long!!


A man is walking down a beach, and accidentally kicks a bottle out of the sand. He opens the bottle, and a genie appears. The genie said, "I am so grateful to get out of that bottle that I will grant you one wish. I can only grant one." The man thought for a while and finally said, "I have always wanted to go to Hawaii. I've never been able to go because airplanes are much too frightening for me and boats make me seasick. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii." The genie thought for a few minutes and said, "No, I can't do it. Imagine all the work involved. All the piling to hold up the highway needed and all the pavement. Ask for something else." "Well," the man said. "I would like to be able to understand women. What makes them laugh and cry, why are they temperamental, why are they so difficult to get along with. Basically, what makes them tick." The genie considered this for a couple of minutes and said, "So, do you want that road two lanes or four?"


In a transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning. One woman in particular loses it. Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane. "I'm too young to die!" she wails. Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on Earth to be memorable! Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN??" For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril, and they all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. Then, a man stands up in the rear of the plane. "I can make you feel like a woman," he says. He's gorgeous. Tall, built, with black hair and jet black eyes, he starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time. No one moves. The woman is breathing heavily in anticipation as the stranger approaches. He removes his shirt. Muscles ripple across his chest as he reaches her, and extends the arm holding his shirt to the trembling woman, and whispers, "Here. Iron this."
 
Shouldn't this joke belong in the confines of the LLR? Huh? I mean really... s'not funny!


LOL! Nope, posted it here to keep you all in line. ;)

Cirdan - :lfao:
 
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