Happy Birthday Chuck

Xue Sheng

All weight is underside
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Chuck Norris is 80 years old today (Born March 10, 1940)

220px-Chuck_Norris_May_2015.jpg
 
Happy birthday Chuck, now for another CN joke.

Chuck Norris actually died 20 years ago, death hasnt plucked up the courage to tell him yet.
 
The boogie man checks under his bed for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can build a snowman. Out of rain.
Chuck Norris CAN cross the same river twice.
Death once had a Near Chuck Norris experience.
Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. But he never cries.
Chuck Norris once peed in the gas tank of a big rig. We now know that truck as Optimus Prime.
 
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris but they had to change it....no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he had two missed calls from Chuck Norris.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHUCK NORRIS !
You've always been a inspiration to me.
 
Chuck Norris doesn't have birthdays. The world recognizes another year of Chuck allowing it to orbit the sun.
 
Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
 
Chuck Norris puts the 'laughter' in 'manslaughter'.
 
Chuck Norris once fought Superman. The loser had to wear his underpants outside of his clothes.
 
How did Chuck Norris get his “manhood” to be 12 inches long?

He folded it in half.
 
I honestly wonder which Chuck Norris line is Chuck’s favorite. He’s said several times that he has a good laugh about them.
 
Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
 
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker the second Wednesday of every month.
 
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