Do you fight like a Coward?

[geezer]

The other day a friend of mine remarked, "A coward is more dangerous than a brave man". He was referring to some workplace backstabbing, but I thought it applied equally well to the martial arts, in a literal sense. In a self-defense situation, the most dangerous aggressor may be the coward. Similarly, in defending yourself, your best bet may be to resort to deception and any devious, underhanded, dirty tactic you can. Still everyone seems to reference sporting combat to justify the effectiveness of their art as self-defense. What about you, do you fight like a hero or a coward?

 

[thardey]

The other day a friend of mine remarked, "A coward is more dangerous than a brave man". He was referring to some workplace backstabbing, but I thought it applied equally well to the martial arts, in a literal sense. In a self-defense situation, the most dangerous aggressor may be the coward. Similarly, in defending yourself, your best bet may be to resort to deception and any devious, underhanded, dirty tactic you can. Still everyone seems to reference sporting combat to justify the effectiveness of their art as self-defense. What about you, do you fight like a hero or a coward?

An absolute coward all the way. If I am forced to fight, that means I am scared for my life, which means I will fight like a cornered, scared man, which is exactly what I will be!

That means I'll have to fight meaner, dirtier, cheat more, and be crueler than the bad guys.

 

[punisher73]

The other day a friend of mine remarked, "A coward is more dangerous than a brave man". He was referring to some workplace backstabbing, but I thought it applied equally well to the martial arts, in a literal sense. In a self-defense situation, the most dangerous aggressor may be the coward. Similarly, in defending yourself, your best bet may be to resort to deception and any devious, underhanded, dirty tactic you can. Still everyone seems to reference sporting combat to justify the effectiveness of their art as self-defense. What about you, do you fight like a hero or a coward?

Hmm, interesting philosophical idea...

Who is the coward in this situation?

Person A: Chooses to walk away from a fight against a drunk knowing without a doubt that s/he could have "won" the fight, even though the drunk and others at the bar are calling him/her every name in the book for walking away and "not standing up" for themself.

Person B: Is taunted by a drunk and is afraid of what his/her co-workers are going to say so s/he engages in the fight and beats the drunk down and "wins" the fight.

I can think of more situations where it takes more courage to walk away from a situation than it does to fight.

As to the other aspect, I think playing scared and fearful can be a good tactic in the right situations. Of course, in the wrong situation I think it could invite someone to attack. Kind of like when a shark smells blood in the water.

 

[Kacey]

The other day a friend of mine remarked, "A coward is more dangerous than a brave man". He was referring to some workplace backstabbing, but I thought it applied equally well to the martial arts, in a literal sense. In a self-defense situation, the most dangerous aggressor may be the coward. Similarly, in defending yourself, your best bet may be to resort to mdeception and any devious, underhanded, dirty tactic you can. Still everyone seems to reference sporting combat to justify the effectiveness of their art as self-defense. What about you, do you fight like a hero or a coward?

First rule of self-defense: don't get into a situation where you need to defend yourself.

Second rule of self-defense: run like hell

Third rule of self defense: if you can't run, do whatever you need to do to get away; see second rule.

Corollary to third rule: do it first, do it fast, do it dirty.

Now, if you consider the above to be the coward's way of fighting, then I guess I fight like a coward. However, should the situation arise, I will also fight to protect others - which is definitely not the cowardly way to do things. Self-defense, and the defense of the defenseless, is, ultimately, about self-preservation - which is a very selfish motive; being selfish is often seen as being cowardly. So I guess it's all in your perspective on what a coward truly is.

For me, a coward is not someone who fights dirty when the circumstances warrant; for me, a coward is someone who starts an unfair fight (could be physical, mental, emotional, etc.) with a horribly unmatched opponent, and then proclaims loudly and proudly about his/her "wonderful victory" over that opponent... who then runs, crying foul, when someone who is closer to being evenly matched appears and offers a fair fight.

From "The Coward of the County" by Kenny Rogers:

He was only ten years old when his daddy died in prison.
I took care of Tommy 'cause he was my brother's son.
I still recall the final words my brother said to Tommy:
"Son, my life is over, but yours has just begun.

Promise me, son, not to do the things I've done.
Walk away from trouble if you can.
Now it won't mean you're weak if you turn the other cheek.
I hope you're old enough to understand:
Son, you don't have to fight to be a man."
...
Twenty years of crawlin' was bottled up inside him.
He wasn't holdin' nothin' back; he let 'em have it all.
When Tommy left the barroom not a Gatlin boy was standin'.
He said, "This one's for Becky," as he watched the last one fall.
And I heard him say,

"I promised you, Dad, not to do the things you done.
I've walked away from trouble when I can.
Now please don't think I'm weak, I didn't turn the other cheek,
and Papa, I sure hope you understand:
Sometimes you gotta fight when you're a man."

Ev'ryone considered him the coward of the county.

 

[championmarius]

A wise man once told me this little gem of combat wisdom.

"Win Ugly"

Do whatever it takes to win, this is not a sport folks, you won't get points for sportsmanship.

So yeah, if you're gonna do it, do it dirty, but you better do it best and first. If that makes me a coward then yup, proud to wear this yellow.

But I see the logic of your inquiry, it is a thought provoking idea. It kinda reminds me of a Sun Tzu thought.

Simulated Chaos is given birth from control. The illusion of fear is given birth from courage. Feigned weakness is given birth from strength. Order and Disorder are a question of numbers; courage and fear are a question of the strategic configuration of power; strength and weakness are a question of the deployment of forces.

 

[tshadowchaser]

yep i am a coward. I will walk away or run if I can get out of a dangerous situation.
If I have to fight it is to survive and I do not play fair or
nice in that situation

 

[terryl965]

I am like some of the others walking or running are always first option, but if I have to fight then it is all balls to the walls theory. I will and have used whatever I needed to to win.

 

[Andy Moynihan]

The question must also be asked: If I am going about my business, and some random assmunch or group thereof decides he wants what I have or am percieved to have( whether that be something material/spiritual/intangible or otherwise), and decides the only, or easiest, way to get it is not to earn it himself but to attempt to take it from me, and tries to hurt/kill me just to have it, now who is the coward?

And if your math works out same as mine does, and that person is the coward, given what the coward is prepared to stoop to....why does a coward deserve "honorable" treatment?

Just as there is a fine line between confidence and caution, so too is there a fine line between "heroism" and foolishness.

 

[morph4me]

yep i am a coward. I will walk away or run if I can get out of a dangerous situation.
If I have to fight it is to survive and I do not play fair or
nice in that situation

I'm with you, I only know of one way to fight, and that's to win, how I do that may not be pretty, but it will damn sure be effective.

 

[MA-Caver]

My eldest brother taught me a valuable lesson with these few simple words...
"There's no such thing as a fair fight!"


"Everyone considered him the coward of the county"
~Kenny Rogers

"What is cowardice but the body's wisdom of its weakness? What is bravery but the body's wisdom of its strength. The coward and the hero march together within every man. So to call one man 'coward' and another 'brave' merely serves to indicate the possibilities of their achieving the opposite." - Master Po

 

[theletch1]

The brave man fights in spite of his fear. The fool fight in the abscence of fear.

Me, I fight like a coward all the way and encourage those that train under my direction to do the same. It may be a bit misleading to say like a coward though. The implication of fighting like a coward is that one fights on pure, instinctive, panic. I attempt to fight with the ferocity of a coward while still keeping as much of my wits about me as possible.

 

[MA-Caver]

The brave man fights in spite of his fear. The fool fight in the abscence of fear.

Me, I fight like a coward all the way and encourage those that train under my direction to do the same. It may be a bit misleading to say like a coward though. The implication of fighting like a coward is that one fights on pure, instinctive, panic. I attempt to fight with the ferocity of a coward while still keeping as much of my wits about me as possible.

Admirable, but difficult to do in the heat of the moment, especially if you're outnumbered. Difficult but possible. Training, discipline and self awareness have been for me, the key(s).
Yet being human I still have fear(s).

 

[JBrainard]

The brave man fights in spite of his fear. The fool fight in the abscence of fear.

True. And it reminded me of something that hasn't been mentioned (but I'm sure we all know): If you experience fear, you must not show it. Showing fear gives off the "victim" vibe and thus your attacker will feel he is more able to victimize you. And that's true before, during, and after a confrontation.

 

[geezer]

I agree with a lot of what's been said so far, but one of the points I was trying to make in the OP was that fighting for your life (or the lives of your loved ones) is nothing like sporting combat, cage fighting or any other form of dueling by choice. I get so sick of people saying that if you don't prove your skills in a public, full-contact MMA context, you shouldn't be teaching self defense of any kind. I believe that self defense skills may be especially valuable to those of us who are not physically or emotionally inclined to subject ourselves to that level of abuse by choice. Opinions?

 

[tellner]

One thing I've learned for sure from the inside and the outside...

A guy who is angry at you will hurt you and hurt you pretty badly.
A guy who is frightened and doesn't think he has a way out will hurt you badly and may well kill you.

I'd rather be able to fight like a cornered rat than stand up like a Manly Man and play knuckle tag with other Manly Men to get status and breeding rights.

 

[Empty Hands]

I get so sick of people saying that if you don't prove your skills in a public, full-contact MMA context, you shouldn't be teaching self defense of any kind.

If your skills aren't useful in that relatively benign context, what makes you think they will hold up under the fierce pressure and do-or-die nature of a real life-or-death situation?

 

[JadecloudAlchemist]

I do not fight like a coward because a coward is affraid.
I do not fight like a hero because I have nothing to prove.
I fight like a warrior. Skilled tactiful looking and picking my targets.
In my experience growing up and fighting it all had to do with "Heart"
meaning the heart or courage to put aside your fear and stick up for yourself a coward can not do that.

 

[morph4me]

If your skills aren't useful in that relatively benign context, what makes you think they will hold up under the fierce pressure and do-or-die nature of a real life-or-death situation?

I have never competed in my life, but I have fought attackers who were out to hurt me or worse. I've done things to save my *** that aren't allowed in any ring. I've proven to my satisfaction that my skills are useful, and I've done it before the benefit of any martial arts training. I've learned that I don't like fighting, it's something I did to keep myself in one piece, and I know I'm not alone, so I'm with geezer on this one.

 

[theletch1]

If your skills aren't useful in that relatively benign context, what makes you think they will hold up under the fierce pressure and do-or-die nature of a real life-or-death situation?

I think his point here isn't that the skills aren't useful it's that so many folks feel like you MUST PROVE something in a relatively benign context.

 

[theletch1]

I do not fight like a coward because a coward is affraid.
I do not fight like a hero because I have nothing to prove.
I fight like a warrior. Skilled tactiful looking and picking my targets.
In my experience growing up and fighting it all had to do with "Heart"
meaning the heart or courage to put aside your fear and stick up for yourself a coward can not do that.

Most real heroes don't have anything to prove either. They do what must be done despite the gut wrenching fear that they are dealing with at the same time. A true warrior also experiences that same fear. Facing a life or death situation without any fear at all doesn't make you great it makes you a fool.