crises. need help.

[Gavin]

I feel depressed, detached and excluded by everyone. My family are out doing their own thing and they never seem lonely because they have a partner. My so-called mates are out tonight and didn't even ask me to come with them. Instead, I am now at home, by myself, on the internet, when everyone that I have tried to call is out. I know I will be famous one day though, and then everyone will make it their business to know me. This is why I must work hard and get to the top of my field, thereby achieving recognition, respect and ultimately glory. Once I am famous everthing will change! they're all actually a joke... let them enjoy themselves. They'll wanna have my attention someday soon, and it'll be too late. I would have moved on! I think I'm going to try and meditate and train harder to achieve my goals and release my rage

 

[Feisty Mouse]

Sounds like you may be depressed. Is there anyone you can talk to?

 

[Gavin]

No, training has been more only escape so far. and it works. any martial arts guidence or training advice?

 

[Bester]

Meditate. Read a good book. (Zig Ziglar, Les Brown, both good writers).
Grab a video game, load it up and hammer at it until you figure it out.
Watch that DVD you've been meaning to watch but no one else wants to.
Nap.
Take a long walk, breath deep and let the mind flow (walking meditation).

 

[Marginal]

Dwelling on this kind of stuff is pointless. You can wallow, or you can do something productive, like train. Can't do both.

 

[BrandiJo]

im sorry i hope you feel better

 

[terryl965]

When I feel alone I train my mind with books and video of my Art Tkd to learn things that I have forgotton all those years ago, your mind needs to expand and the feeling your having will dimines all together, control is the key to success.

 

[mj-hi-yah]

Gavin I'm sorry for your current situation. There are some things I think you can try and do to change that. Have you spoken to your family and friends and expressed your loneliness and anger? They can not help you if they do not know about your feelings. Also, since you tell us you are depressed you could try and talk to a professional who can help you to work through your rage and help you learn to communicate your feelings to the people in your life. You are doing great at communicating your feelings here, but it would be fantastic to see you do that with the people in your life that matter to you. I think a professional would be able to help you to work through your stuff, and teach you communication skills so you can express your thoughts honestly to your friends and family, and you'll then be more equipped to move beyond those thoughts. I think focusing on your training is an excellent idea also. If you are having immediate rage that you need to work through hit the heavy bag and totally exhaust yourself, this way you'll hopefully release some endorphins and that will help you to feel a little better, plus you'll be too tired to have negative thoughts.


Feel better!
MJ :asian:

 

[tshadowchaser]

wu su is a great art that takes much time to learn and the work outs leave you feeling relaxed. How about telling us about you workouts and your instructor

 

[Shaolinwind]

No, training has been more only escape so far. and it works. any martial arts guidence or training advice?

Just don't dwell too much on self pity. I get caught in that rut and it doesn't do me any good.

Assume everything is your fault and work to undo the damage you've done. Seems a little self destructive but it's working for me.

 

[Sin]

Its all about breathing....rememmber to breath

 

[Touch Of Death]

I feel depressed, detached and excluded by everyone. My family are out doing their own thing and they never seem lonely because they have a partner. My so-called mates are out tonight and didn't even ask me to come with them. Instead, I am now at home, by myself, on the internet, when everyone that I have tried to call is out. I know I will be famous one day though, and then everyone will make it their business to know me. This is why I must work hard and get to the top of my field, thereby achieving recognition, respect and ultimately glory. Once I am famous everthing will change! they're all actually a joke... let them enjoy themselves. They'll wanna have my attention someday soon, and it'll be too late. I would have moved on! I think I'm going to try and meditate and train harder to achieve my goals and release my rage

Try to lay off the "someday" stuff and take charge now. If you consider people that are important to you a joke, then you shouldn't worry about what they think, do, or wheather or not they include or exclude you; so, start by changing your attitude and admit these people are have become too important to you, or else you wouldn't be posting about them. lashing out at them, even in your head, is not helping either. Get some self help books, see a councelor, or even - God forbid - watch a little Dr. Phill once in a while. You and people like you are why they make these shows... to help shed the victim mentality.
Sean

 

[Corporal Hicks]

Hey, most of us have been there some time or another. It may sound harsh but man stop thinking about it, and do it. You know you want to get out there and do something about it, you know because of the anger thats in your words.

Just remember however you dont need to be proving anything to anybody! You are you own person! Your not in this world to live up to anybody's expectations.

As the other guys/gals said here, talk to somebody, seek help, train hard. Try to look at the good side of life, and dont tell me that there isnt a good side to life, because you have already stated your MA training is a good part of life. So focus on it. When you feel down, think about what your going to do next to enhance your training. What combinations are you going to think up? How you going to carry them out?

Releasing rage on your friends could show that you have a lack of control. (Am I angering you yet lol?). Do you think that you will find fufilment when you have become famous and that they will see you differently. You dont need that, you are a person now, you are somebody worth knowing now. You dont need status to be friends with somebody or somebodies.

Sometimes , not saying you are not, but you have to be a friend to have a friend!

Kind Regards
Nick

P.s. dont worry, it happens to us all, your kick *** eventually!

 

[TigerWoman]

Doesn't everyone have days like that? When I was young, time was full but spent not wisely. When I had children, job etc. time was spent for them, I had very little for myself. Now I have time again, and I know to spend it wisely, well...have to limit myself on MT! Take your time now and find out what you want to do with it Gavin. Don't depend on others for your happiness. If you are in high school, college, delve into what interests you, what can build you up. Don't dwell on what can destroy you...self-doubt. You can do anything your mind is made up to do but it is not to impress others. What others think of you is much less than what you think of yourself. Did you spend your day wisely? Did you excel at your work from school so that you can continue in your goals?

Have you put on paper what you enjoy to do? Work must have some "play" accompaning it. Does your play only involve others to be fun? Why do others have to make it more fun or do you make it fun? For example: my son likes to play paintball. Shooting at a target only got so far. So, he got another friend to play it with him. Now he has an organized website and about 50-100 regulars. He has organized a multi-state (3) event just this last weekend. He made his own "fun". People are attracted to leaders because they give them something.

Obviously you have an interest in martial arts. There are many videos and books regarding this. There is this forum which is great to read and learn more. You can always practice your martial art. I practice form when I have spare time. To let out pent up energy, frustration, do punch and kick a bag and release some of those endorphins. Then channel your energy into something productive for yourself. Grow. Do not wallow and stagnate. You have a choice like all of us. And we are always here for you. TW