A minor annoyance

Balrog

Master of Arts
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I'm sure that this has happened to all of us. Someone in the course of a conversation finds out that we practice martial arts, or they see us in uniform outside the school, such as stopping at the grocery store on the way home. And what do they all say?

"Oh, please don't hit me!"

"Oh, I better not mess with you!'

Or variations of the above. Lately, it's started to bug me and I have to force myself to just smile and say, "Ha-ha, very funny" instead of asking them, "Did you really think that I woke up at 0600 today and before I got out of bed, I said to myself that I was going to find you and hit you?"

I don't know why this has started to annoy me like this, but it has. What are some of your pet peeve misconceptions that you have encountered?
 
"You don't look like a martial artist", that one annoys me. I think mostly because it's often said by parents or by prospective adult male students, what I think they mean is 'you can't teach me anything being a smallish older woman' and it does get right up my nose.

The 'oh I'd better not mess with you' is the one I tend to get at work, I do get a bit sarky I admit especially when I'm tired on night shift and it tends to be a short sharp answer, 'no you really had not better mess with me cos I'm not in the mood'.
 
Ive only encountered this Twice.

Both times I replied, "Possibly. Perhaps We should Flip a Coin?"

It works strangely well.
 
It's always sort of amused my wife and I that security comes looking for me when there's an unruly patient in the ER.

That being the case, I don't get too many comments like that. It's more often that one of our staff will say "I'm glad you're on our side".
 
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I avoid wearing a gi outside of school at all costs.

I'm with you, but I teach darned near every day and have no changing room ... and it does, unfortunately, come up in conversation occasionally.

I've noticed that when women find out I study martial arts, they are usually either fascinated or turned off. It's mainly the men who say things like "so you could theoretically kick my ***, huh?" or "I know not to mess with you unless I wanna get hurt."

But *honestly* my deepest peeve is this:

I keep my sword and a few other things right next to the head of my bed, mainly for convenience and safety - my bedroom stays locked and secure and it's the best bet right now until I can afford a safe. My husband often jokes around with others who know I train by 1. revealing this and 2. saying, "I know how I'm going to die ... in my sleep!"

:tantrum:

I informed him that if he truly felt that way that we should separate and get some therapy - he laughs it off. He has said it enough where people are starting to look at me funny.

What happens if someone breaks into our home and uses my weapons on him? What are people going to think about me? We've talked about this, too.

Yeah. My deepest pet peeve.
 
I avoid wearing a gi outside of school at all costs.

That used to be the norm. No one would be allowed to leave a dojo in uniform. I used to think only kids did that, and wondered about how a dojo could allow it. That said, my GM used to travel between classrooms in uniform in Korea, but then he was a GM on a schedule. And if, like shesulsa, you don't have a changing room, what can you do?

When people make comments to me I usually just blow it off. I usually take it to be someone who figures they should say something, but don't really know anything intelligent to say. I guess they think they are being cute. But sometimes it can be annoyance. I guess they are fascinated to actually meet an MA.
 
"Oh, please don't hit me!"

"Oh, I better not mess with you!'
I got that at work once when a coworker overheard a conversation (two of my other coworkers train with me) and said, 'Come train with us,' and then sang, 'then you too can say... nobody bothers me.'

He nearly died laughing.
 
I'm with you, but I teach darned near every day and have no changing room ... and it does, unfortunately, come up in conversation occasionally.

I've noticed that when women find out I study martial arts, they are usually either fascinated or turned off. It's mainly the men who say things like "so you could theoretically kick my ***, huh?" or "I know not to mess with you unless I wanna get hurt."

But *honestly* my deepest peeve is this:

I keep my sword and a few other things right next to the head of my bed, mainly for convenience and safety - my bedroom stays locked and secure and it's the best bet right now until I can afford a safe. My husband often jokes around with others who know I train by 1. revealing this and 2. saying, "I know how I'm going to die ... in my sleep!"

:tantrum:

I informed him that if he truly felt that way that we should separate and get some therapy - he laughs it off. He has said it enough where people are starting to look at me funny.

What happens if someone breaks into our home and uses my weapons on him? What are people going to think about me? We've talked about this, too.

Yeah. My deepest pet peeve.

My answer to the highlighted quote would be, "No, not theoretically. I can do it in reality."

Regarding the husband comments, mine keeps telling people that if our daughter and I keep progressing, he is going to have to get a concealed carry (weapons) permit, just to feel safe coming into our house. That is so not true. We stopped trying to show him what we had learned in class after we passed the mid-yellow belt level, due to all the whining. (That man gets so fussy about one little kidney punch...)

The main comment I keep hearing is the, "So I guess I had better not make you mad..." one. What? They were planning to do things just to make me upset otherwise??? Whatever. It is easy to see how great the divide is between the reality of MA and the public perception of it.
 
"What, you? Wow. I never expected that!" I merely smile and shrug it off - they're right. I'm tiny.
"So I shouldn't mess with you, or you're going to kick me ding-dong and chop me up in pieces, right?"
I can only smirk and be vague. I don't want to challenge people, but I don't want them seeing me as a weak target either :/
 
I'm with you, but I teach darned near every day and have no changing room ... and it does, unfortunately, come up in conversation occasionally.

I've noticed that when women find out I study martial arts, they are usually either fascinated or turned off. It's mainly the men who say things like "so you could theoretically kick my ***, huh?" or "I know not to mess with you unless I wanna get hurt."

But *honestly* my deepest peeve is this:

I keep my sword and a few other things right next to the head of my bed, mainly for convenience and safety - my bedroom stays locked and secure and it's the best bet right now until I can afford a safe. My husband often jokes around with others who know I train by 1. revealing this and 2. saying, "I know how I'm going to die ... in my sleep!"

:tantrum:

I informed him that if he truly felt that way that we should separate and get some therapy - he laughs it off. He has said it enough where people are starting to look at me funny.

What happens if someone breaks into our home and uses my weapons on him? What are people going to think about me? We've talked about this, too.

Yeah. My deepest pet peeve.

My answer to the highlighted quote would be, "No, not theoretically. I can do it in reality."

Regarding the husband comments, mine keeps telling people that if our daughter and I keep progressing, he is going to have to get a concealed carry (weapons) permit, just to feel safe coming into our house. That is so not true. We stopped trying to show him what we had learned in class after we passed the mid-yellow belt level, due to all the whining. (That man gets so fussy about one little kidney punch...)

The main comment I keep hearing is the, "So I guess I had better not make you mad..." one. What? They were planning to do things just to make me upset otherwise??? Whatever. It is easy to see how great the divide is between the reality of MA and the public perception of it.

Not trying to second guess or play armchair psychologist -- though that is what I'm doing -- but that seems pretty nasty passive aggressive behavior. I think in both cases something more going on in the background in both these cases. I don't know if your spouses are having their masculinity threatened, are just insecure, or what... but there certainly seems to be something more there, especially when they persist despite your request they stop. Y'all may want to consider some couples or family counseling, before the underlying issues spread...

Though, of course, my thoughts may be influenced by some holiday family drama of my own...
 
I avoid telling people I study until i have known them for a long time but if the do find out some how and ask a silly question I invite them to come study with us. That usualy ends the conversation as most do not want to put the time into working out.
As for the uniform I tell my student that if they must come to class in a uniform they may wear the bottoms and a plain t-shirt and cary the top and belt. Thay are told never to wear the complet uniform outside of class or an event we are going to.
Going back to the stupid comments people make: I usualy try to just laugh them off and smile that makes people wonder what I find funny. If they ask I just tell them I'm a lowly student and have no skills yet.
 
I get "teased" at work from my frieds but its all in good fun. "karate Kid" and did you get kicked in the ***** today. are the normal ones. Never been approached out of class but I too try to not wear a Gi outside of class. At most I wear the pants and a jacket or t-shirt if I need to stop for gas or something.

I will say I get SO tired of "I didnt do it" or "Bob cops are here for you" when I wore a uniform and would walk into any public place. I prob heard "I didnt do it" 10 times a day. Do people really think they are the only one that ever thought of that joke I mean come on man.
 
when i used to train as a kid id just done a grading and my mum took me out for dinner as a celebration. (i was about 12)

there was a restaurant we'd often go to but that time i was wearing my gi. they didnt say anything but my mum jokes it was the quickest service we'd ever had :D

always makes me chuckle a bit
 
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