11 year old pregnant

[fightingfat]

The case of a schoolgirl who fell pregnant at the age of 11 has prompted calls for a better teenage sexual health strategy in Scotland.
The girl from West Lothian - who would become one of the UK's youngest mothers - told a newspaper that she was looking forward to having her child.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/edinburgh_and_east/4764417.stm
Do you think this is ok or wrong? If you think it is ok, why? If you think it is wrong where do you draw the line with this sort of thing? What should be done?

 

[BrandiJo]

i think its wrong that an 11 year old is sexually active, education is good but will not solve the problem. I think the culture that created the situation needs to be addressed. The parents should have been more involved in this girls life, and she should not be looking forward to having a child and thus ruining her childhood.

 

[ed-swckf]

The case of a schoolgirl who fell pregnant at the age of 11 has prompted calls for a better teenage sexual health strategy in Scotland.
The girl from West Lothian - who would become one of the UK's youngest mothers - told a newspaper that she was looking forward to having her child.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/edinburgh_and_east/4764417.stm
Do you think this is ok or wrong? If you think it is ok, why? If you think it is wrong where do you draw the line with this sort of thing? What should be done?

I read this a few days back and discussed it on another forum. When a child begins smoking and drinking at the age of 9 you have to question the parenting there.

Personally the saddest thing about it for me was that i didn't find the news of this girl drinking, smoking and getting pregnnant at such a young age at all shocking. In fact its disturbing that its becoming an accepted part of our society for young teens (children) to become mothers with little preperation or stability to do so.

 

[MJS]

I read this a few days back and discussed it on another forum. When a child begins smoking and drinking at the age of 9 you have to question the parenting there.

I couldn't agree more with this statement!!! How is anyone supposed to know right from wrong if they're not taught the differences? Many times, parents are the first ones to blame others for the downfall of their child, instead of opening their eyes and not be so clueless as to whats going on with their child!

Mike

 

[Swordlady]

My god...it is NEVER okay for someone *this* young to become a parent. This girl is still a child herself - and now she's going to try to raise a baby? Where are her parents? Does she have the family support that she's DEFINITELY going to need? Raising a child is a HUGE responsibility that changes one's life forever. This poor girl really isn't going to have much of a childhood if she keeps her baby.

The article says that the girl's 34-year-old mother is "proud" of her daughter for wanting to keep the baby. Does this mean the girl's mother thinks that her behavior was "okay"? And this girl is smoking 20 cigarettes a day. Does she know how bad that is for the baby? And why on God's green earth is she smoking to begin with?!

I think it says alot about today's society, if children smoking, drinking, having children, etc. is practically "acceptable" behavior. I am especially alarmed about the growing number of preteen/teen parents. Most all of the single mothers I've worked with started having children during their teen years. Many of these single mothers didn't finish high school, and are stuck in minimum wage jobs, if they are working at all. And many of their children also wind up having problems at school, drop out - and further perpetuate the cycle. Don't get me wrong; some of these single mothers *do* succeed and make a better life for themselves. But unfortunately, the odds are usually stacked against them - especially if they lack a proper education.

 

[fightingfat]

*Just to play devil's advocate for a minute* :wink1:



Consider that if this girl is capable of conceiving a child, then biologically, it is possible, and therefore within nature, i.e. natural for her to do so. Could it be that our social constraints are out of step with our biology?

 

[Andrew Green]

Biologically possible does not mean that the child will come out healthy, I got to question whether an 11 year old is capable physically of carrying a baby and giving birth, even if they are capable of getting pregnant.

In nature, do you think this baby would survive? I'd guess there is a good chance neither the baby nor the mother would have...

 

[terryl965]

Well not trying to dis-agree with everybody, but in the older days was'nt it practice to have childern that young, I'm against anybody have childern until they have there life together. 11 is in no way old enough for her to physically or emotionally carry the burden of a child!!!!
Terry

 

[Kenpobldr]

This is so WRONG! Parents need to be more aware about who their children asscociate with. My daughter is eleven and her body and mind are no where ready to produce a child. She cant even take the dog out without complaining at times. Some girls her age are "boy crazy" and since I coach that age braket in soccer I hear it all the time that one girl is "going out with" that boy. But in reality there going out consists of IM ing each other, they dont ever meet outside of school. A couple of months ago I over heard one girl say "Why would I go out with him, we don't even have the same recess." So this eleven year old being pregnant is so very wrong and seems so off base of what I have seen from girls at that age.

 

[MA-Caver]

*Just to play devil's advocate for a minute* :wink1:



Consider that if this girl is capable of conceiving a child, then biologically, it is possible, and therefore within nature, i.e. natural for her to do so. Could it be that our social constraints are out of step with our biology?

Sure they are... but is our sense of RIGHT and WRONG out of sync with common decency/sense. There's a reason why we advocate "wait til you're older" to have sex/babies. Maturity in every aspect of a child's development to an adult; emotional, mental and physical.
Sure she's able to have menstration and ovulate at that young age, but it doesn't give her the emotional capabiltity to handle the stress that pregnacy can and does bring. Have you been around (long periods) with a pregnant woman... you understand the concept of mood-swings? Do you understand the concept of post-partum stress syndrome? That alone is hard enough for a mature woman... how is that 11 year old child going to handle it?
Also physiologically the 11 yr. old probably will not be able to carry the child to full term, nor will the fetus be fully developed if the girl does manage to do so. It will most likely either miscarriage, be a premmie, underdeveloped or basically dead in the womb. The 11 yr. old probably wouldn't even survive the labor (yes, of course she would have to have a C-section... duh!).

Her mother is obviously the problem. The article quotes that she is "proud of her daughter and will help her raise the baby". This kind of parental irresponsibility is what going to bring a downfall of society as we know it.

I find it horrifying and terribly sad that this happened. I've several 11-14 yr old "nieces"... I can't even phantom the idea that one of them would be pregnant, let alone being sexually active at that age.

 

[patroldawg27]

This is wrong on any and all levels! How can one CHILD hope to raise another CHILD? Who will care for it while mommy is at jr high school? Where were her parents during all this? This one simply just boggles the mind! :idunno:

 

[shesulsa]

To play devil's advocate for the mom, perhaps she's proud that her daughter is going to keep her baby IN LEIU OF having an abortion. Perhaps this is the only way in which she can be supportive of her.

But my gawd ... she is a child. I'm flabbergasted.

 

[Swordlady]

*Just to play devil's advocate for a minute* :wink1:



Consider that if this girl is capable of conceiving a child, then biologically, it is possible, and therefore within nature, i.e. natural for her to do so. Could it be that our social constraints are out of step with our biology?

Just because a person is "biologically" capable of having a child, it does NOT mean she should go out and have several children before she turns twenty. Granted it may be normal and expected in other countries, but those countries may also have *different* views about parenting (e.g., it may be a community effort to raise the children, NOT just the mother).

However, in the United States (especially in the larger cities), single mothers often do NOT have the same family support. I've worked with this one single mother who was my age (I was 26-years-old at the time) - and had nine children from three different men. I don't know how old she was when she had her first child, but she must've been in at least her early to mid teens. None of the fathers were anywhere to be found. Unfortunately, situations like hers tend to be more of the *norm*.

Though there are exceptions to the rule, single parenthood almost always falls on the mother's shoulders. And as I stated before, American society still doesn't treat single mothers too well. Trust me on this; I've worked with single mothers for over four years. They definitely have a long hard road ahead of them.

Edited to add: I realized that I went a bit off-topic a bit with my single mother rant. Then again, that is where this young girl is headed. I really hope and pray that she learned her lesson and does not have any more children until she becomes MUCH older and a LOT more mature.

 

[mantis]

just a question
what makes it wrong for 11 year old
and makes it right or at least okay for 18, or even 32?

 

[Kacey]

There are several things going wrong here.

First, biologically, girls, especially those from Europe and America, have been reaching puberty younger and younger for decades - the most prevalent theory suggests that better nutrition (and therefore higher body fat) triggers puberty at younger ages, where before a girl would have to have been 15 or 16 to able to become pregnant; however, there are exceptions to everything; the youngest known girl to give birth was 5 1/2 - see http://www.snopes.com/pregnant/medina.asp for details. This article also states that the average age of first menstruation in the US is 12 1/2 - and for that to be the average, some girls must be starting younger.

Second, the child is totally out of control, and is living the life of an adult - an out-of-control adult, at that. While, in my opinion, the primary fault lies with the family, there must be some societal acceptance, or they would be trying to cover this up, not allowing it to be touted in the press.

Finally, I knew a girl who had a child at that age. The primary difference was that the girl I knew was cognitively delayed - IQ in the low 60s. Some boy had been nice to her, and therefore she did what he asked her to do - namely, she had sex with him. When I met her, she was in 7th grade, and her son was about 18 months old - conceived in the summer between 5th and 6th grade, so, when she was either 10 or 11 (I was a sub, so I didn't know her that well). She told me that she didn't understand what was so hard about raising a baby - she didn't have any problems with him at all during the hour a week that Social Services let her see him. Given her cognitive delay, she also didn't understand that it might be different if she had him all the time. However, I have read about other girls of about that age who had children for one or more of these reasons: someone was nice to them (especially if no one at home paid any attention - I read about one girl who let a boy have sex with her because he bought her her own order of french fries); they didn't know enough about sex to realize that's what they were doing; they thought it was a way to be popular; having a baby is a status symbol in their society (and in that same society, getting a girl pregnant was, likewise, a status symbol); and/or incest (after all, if you're banging your underage female relative because 'you just can't help yourself' then you certainly can't buy condoms - that would show intent).

There is nothing positive I can say about this child's situation... only hope that her story can be used as a cautionary tale for other children who think it can't happen to them - a belief which is, after all, the definition of adolescence.

 

[MA-Caver]

just a question
what makes it wrong for 11 year old
and makes it right or at least okay for 18, or even 32?

Re-read my post please... it's wrong because physically, mentally and emotionally she is just NOT READY for that type of changes to her mind, body and spirit!

 

[mantis]

Re-read my post please... it's wrong because physically, mentally and emotionally she is just NOT READY for that type of changes to her mind, body and spirit!

well she's obviously very ready!
but that's not my point
my point is what decides if im 17 it's wrong to be pregnant, but the day after my 18th bday it becomes alright.
my point is the society is not strict enough in identifying what's wrong and what's right. that's why over time what's wrong becomes right.
im told im a devil's advocate when raising this "stupid" question. well i think who illegalizes this for the 11 year old and allows it for the 18 is the one, not me.
maybe this is a healthy thing in a society, or maybe not.

just for the record, im not defending that or anything. i personally think wrong is not enough a word to describe it, but that's my personal view of the matter

 

[Rich Parsons]

*Just to play devil's advocate for a minute* :wink1:



Consider that if this girl is capable of conceiving a child, then biologically, it is possible, and therefore within nature, i.e. natural for her to do so. Could it be that our social constraints are out of step with our biology?

First, in todays society 11 is too young. Oor society has not propared tehm to be an adult by this age. We ahve grown to charish those years of being young and wish them to be carefree for our own young.

Second, in the past a 16 year old was an old maid. This means she had been passed by a few times. Later 16 year old had a coming out party to bascially let everyone know she is available. While now, in some states it may be legal, but the accepted age is 18 in the USA and a fwe other countries.

A few years ago while doing some research, France had more Vigins and less sexual activity in their children/teenagers because sex is accepted in theri lifes and not a taboo, than the USA which was trying to teach lack of knowledge and abstinence versus edcuation and teaching that there are responsibility for actions taken.

So let us look at some other research I have seen on the The Learning Channel, that most young female start to menstruate when they reach and maintain the body weight of 106 lbs / 48 kgs. Given the current situation in the USA and some other countries of over weight young people having young women begin to menstruate at an early age may not be an issue that their body/mind/emotions are ready to have sex and deal with the responsibilities, but is an issue of overall health and possible a weight issue.

Not knowing the health and eating habits of Scotland, I can only make these comments in discussion and for thought.

 

[mantis]

First, in todays society 11 is too young. Oor society has not propared tehm to be an adult by this age. We ahve grown to charish those years of being young and wish them to be carefree for our own young.

Second, in the past a 16 year old was an old maid. This means she had been passed by a few times. Later 16 year old had a coming out party to bascially let everyone know she is available. While now, in some states it may be legal, but the accepted age is 18 in the USA and a fwe other countries.

A few years ago while doing some research, France had more Vigins and less sexual activity in their children/teenagers because sex is accepted in theri lifes and not a taboo, than the USA which was trying to teach lack of knowledge and abstinence versus edcuation and teaching that there are responsibility for actions taken.

So let us look at some other research I have seen on the The Learning Channel, that most young female start to menstruate when they reach and maintain the body weight of 106 lbs / 48 kgs. Given the current situation in the USA and some other countries of over weight young people having young women begin to menstruate at an early age may not be an issue that their body/mind/emotions are ready to have sex and deal with the responsibilities, but is an issue of overall health and possible a weight issue.

Not knowing the health and eating habits of Scotland, I can only make these comments in discussion and for thought.

that's awesome.
but if more 11 year olds(!) do the same it will become 'right' over time, or at least it will become acceptable.
if i asked this questions about homosexuals a couple of decades ago i would have been called the devil's advocate again!
however, homosexuality is becoming more than a normal thing in several societies.
im not defending, or discussing homosexuality, or 11 year old girls getting pregnant, but i am pointing out that the society is unable to protect its values because they are not explicitly defined.
that what i personally believe is wrong.

 

[Kacey]

The difference is between 'physically capable' and 'ready to raise children', I think. Lots of people are physically able to do things that have implications they are not ready to deal with.